~ archived since 2018 ~

Online Dating – How To Deal With The “I Want To Get To Know You First” Excuse

January 14, 2019

When youâre engaged in online dating, one of the dumbest, and sadly most common excuses women use when you do a date pitch is, âI want to get to know you first.â

This is, of course, stupid. You donât get to know someone over a fucking dating site or app. The only way you can truly get to know someone is by sitting down and talking to them face-to-face in real life.

I suppose one could argue that you could Skype or FaceTime instead of that, but that isnât what these women are suggesting either. They just want to waste more of your time by chatting back and forth over the stupid dating site/app.

Saying that you donât want to meet up with someone because you want to get to know them first is like saying you donât want to buy a lawnmower because you want to mow the lawn first. Itâs just irrational bullshit.

Some women will counter this by saying that what they really mean is that they donât feel safe, and that the need to âget to know you firstâ to make sure youâre not a serial rapist or axe murderer. Again, this is stupid because women know damn well that youâre going to meet up in a very public place for the first meet where she will be perfectly safe, not go right over to the guyâs house, all alone in the middle of the night (and yes, there are always exceptions to this).

You need to understand that this excuse is simply that: an excuse. Thatâs all it is. Donât pay any attention to it whatsoever other than as an excuse to delay the interaction and waste more of your time. Sometimes women do this as a provider hunter move in order to qualify you as a beta. Other times they do it because theyâre just attention whores who have no intention of ever actually meeting you (or any other guy on the site/app) in real life.

It doesnât matter why she says this. Always ignore what women SAY and only pay attention to what they DO. When you get this excuse, you simply need to proceed with the usual proven dating system I describe here. Just proceed.

Granted, you still need to address that in some way while proceeding with the usual system. If you avoid answering any direct questions or requests when talking to a woman online, your odds of success always go down.

I have had sex with many women over the years who used the âI want to get to know you first excuseâ while talking to me online, including in just the last few years. Hereâs exactly how I did it:

First, I write back a message that starts with âSure! I live in such-and-such and I do such-and-such for work. I have two kids and I travel a lot. I work pretty hard but I set my own schedule. For fun I like toâ¦â and give about two more very general sentences about me.

Second, I close the message by saying âIs there anything else youâd like to know?â And then I add, âIf youâre comfortable, we could meet up next Monday after work for a quick coffee. Just for about 30 minutes.â

This way, I’m accomplishing the following things all at once:

1. Iâm honoring her request for more information and not blowing it off, which would raise red flags.

2. Iâm still moving the process forward. The only goal, as always, to all online dating is to get that first date scheduled and make sure it happens. Iâll answer her questions and concerns, but I will not let her delay the process. Otherwise, Iâm gone.

3. Iâm making the date pitch very light, friendly, safe, and âno big deal.â If sheâs giving the bullshit âI need to get to know you firstâ excuse, the odds are decent that sheâs nervous about something and needs a little lighter touch. This is fine as long as you keep moving the process forward.

If you are using a dating app like Tinder or Bumble, the conversation is much more like a texting conversation, so you are free to say something like âWhat else would you like to know?â and answer a few more of her questions. Just a few. Not many. Donât get into friend zone!

If you are using a dating site like OkCupid or Seeking Arrangement, do not make the mistake of saying âOkay! What would you like to know?â and then having some big back-and-forth conversation. Doing that will kill your odds. You need to move swiftly.

If, after this exchange, she still gives you more bullshit about wanting to get to know you, itâs time to drop her and move on. Trust me, she has no interest in actually seeing you (or if she does, sheâs not going to have sex with you quickly). Send her a final message saying, âI completely understand. If you change your mind, just hit me up. It was really nice chatting with you!â and then move on.

By the way, the above technique assumes that youâre doing everything else correctly as I describe in the Ultimate Online Dating Manual, such as your photos are as best as you can get them, youâre not being negative or too sexual in your online banter, your openers arenât too long, and so on. Doing the above will not cure anything else youâre doing wrong, it will only improve your results if youâre doing everything else correctly.

Iâm coming to a town near you in 2019 to do the least expensive Alpha Male 2.0 seminar Iâve ever done. Iâll be in 18 different cities in the USA, Australia, Canada, and Europe. If you want to come to a low-cost seminar to learn how to improve your financial and woman life, click HERE and get your tickets! The next cities coming up are Dallas, Houston, and Brisbane!

Alpha Male 2.0 World Tour 2019

TheRedArchive is an archive of Red Pill content, including various subreddits and blogs. This post has been archived from the blog Caleb Jones.

Caleb Jones archive

Download the post

Want to save the post for offline use on your device? Choose one of the download options below:

Post Information
Title Online Dating – How To Deal With The “I Want To Get To Know You First” Excuse
Author BlackDragon
Date January 14, 2019 1:00 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Blog Caleb Jones
Archive Link
Original Link
Red Pill terms in post
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2023. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter