3. Categorization
This means you understand which women qualify for FB, MLTR, or OLTR relationships and which ones do not. You need to develop a system (and a feel) for which women are only good for causal relationships, which ones are good for dating but not something to the level of girlfriend (or OLTR in the nonmono world), and those very few who qualify for something serious, as in girlfriend or wife.
This is my version of âscreening,â as I described here. The Alpha Male 2.0 model does not involve any screening beyond physical appearance and drama levels. If sheâs attractive to you and sheâs nice to you, sheâs in; nothing else matters. Her upbringing, lifestyle, intelligence, race, education, family history, religion, outlook on life, and so on are completely irrelevant. If sheâs a lower quality woman, thatâs fine; sheâs an FB and thatâs it. If sheâs of higher quality, then, and only then, sheâs an MLTR or possibly a candidate for OLTR.
Most men donât understand how to categorize women and relationships this way. They treat all women they have sex with the same. Players treat them all like casual FBs, betas treat them all like girlfriends or close to it. Both of these methods are a recipe for problems.
A lot of other guys know how to do this, but lack the emotional control to actually follow through on it. These would be the men who get serious (i.e. something beyond FB) with attractive but clearly problematic women when they know damn well they shouldnât.
Failure to get good at categorizing means youâre going to have a lot of drama and problems in your relationships and your relationships wonât last as long as they otherwise would.
4. Congruence
You can consider congruence as the second part of categorization. Once you categorize a woman as an FB, MLTR, or OLTR, you must treat her this way throughout the entire relationship, and no other way (unless you decide to upgrade or downgrade her later, but that is a deliberate and purposeful choice).
Too many guys donât know how to do this.
Theyâll take their FB out to the movies. No!
Theyâll introduce their low-end MLTR to all of their friends and family. No!
Theyâll treat their OLTR like a whore. No!
They spend the night with one of their FBs. No!
They see their MLTR three times a week. No!
And so on. Men are really bad at congruence. It’s one of the biggest things they do wrong in relationships. Lack of congruence in relationships causes all kinds of conflict, arguments, and hurt feelings, and itâs almost always the manâs fault.
You need to get good at treating FBs like FBs, MLTRs like MLTRs, and so on.
5. Sexual Skills
The guy who does nothing but one-night-stands and the typical monogamy guy can just whip his clothes off, mount a woman, pump pumpity pump, cum, roll off of her, and be done. But the guy who wants long-term, low-drama relationships with multiple women at the same time needs to actually make women feel good during sex, and do so every time they have sex.
If you donât do this, women will bail on you fast. Asking her to be cool while you go have sex with other women is a lot to ask of a girl. Itâs a direct assault on her Societal Programming, ASD, and Disney.
However, if you fuck her the way she loves and make her orgasm like crazy every time you have sex, sheâll A) stick around even if youâre having sex with other women, B) quickly return to you if she ever leaves you for other reasons, and C) wonât be nearly as dramatic or demanding of you. This has been extensively field-tested by me and lots of other men who have done this. Making a woman feel really good sexually is very powerful in ways most men donât understand (namely because so many men are bad in bed; women become accustomed to it).
This means you need to learn how to A) make women feel good in bed and B) communicate with women to understand what makes them feel good individually, since all women are different.
6. Outcome Independence
Outcome independence is a requirement for all Alpha Male 2.0 lifestyle aspects of course, from dating, to relationships, to location-independent entrepreneurship, and so on. But itâs absolutely core to maintaining nonmono relationships.
Without outcome independence, you will do things like:
- Fall into Sheâs Not Like The Rest⢠traps
- Get angry and/or reactive when she does things you donât like
- Get jealous (even if sheâs not fucking other guys!)
- Get depressed and/or needy if/when she LSNFTEs you
- Fall into her frame more often
- Have drama and arguments more often
All of these things will severely damage your relationships, as well as reduce your return rate for if/when she leaves you.
Stop giving a shit. So much of success and happiness in life is about not giving a fuck.
The more you give a fuck, the more power she has over you. As the old saying goes, and itâs right, the one who cares the least has the most amount of power. Moreover, the one who cares the least produces the most attraction in the other.
7. Drama Management
Nonmonogamous Alpha 2.0s have far less drama than men in normal monogamous relationships, and by wide margins. Yet, women are still women, so occasional drama will still occur in MLTRs and an OLTR no matter how good you are. A core relationship skill is to not only reduce the odds of drama occurring, but to know exactly what to do when drama occurs so that the drama itself, the damage it causes to the relationship, and the damage it causes to her level of attraction is all minimized.
Soft nexting is a big part of this, but there are many other aspects of this skill involved as well.