Time Management When Dating – Part 2

Write down the minimum sexual and/or relationship activities you require for your baseline of happiness. In The Unchained Man, I talk about the Alpha Male 2.0 sexual baseline minimums, which are:

1. The ability to have sex with at least two new women within 30 days whom you consider at least cute.

2. Having sex on a regular, ideally weekly basis.

These are good, and these are indeed minimum long-term baselines, but Iâm talking here about your minimums right now.

To use myself as an example, as Iâve said many times, my absolute minimum is to have sex at least three times a week (on average) without having to promise any one woman monogamy. Thatâs my minimum. Not my ideal, but my minimum. (My ideal is what I have now; a smokinâ hot OLTR wife in my age range and several hot, young FBs on the side whenever I want, but it took me several years to put all of that together.)

So my minimum is just about sex, which means if I had two FBs providing that sex three times a week, that would be fine.

Your minimum might be different. Maybe you have a lower sex drive than me (most men do). Maybe your minimum is sex once a week. Thatâs fine. If youâre sure thatâs what it really is and youâre not bullshitting yourself or rationalizing your laziness, then great, put that down.

Maybe youâre a more emotional or connected guy than me. Maybe you need sex at least twice a week but you want at least one of these women to be in an emotional, connected relationship with you. In that case, youâd state âsex twice a week from at least two women but at least one of this is an MLTR). Not ideal in my opinion because of this, but again, weâre not talking about ideal here, just minimums right now.

Now that youâve defined your minimums, all you need to do is to put in the minimum time required to hit those minimums, and no more. This is often a revelation to a lot of guys. You may realize that your minimums are much lower than you thought. With all this crazy shit in the manosphere and on Instagram and so forth, you might be thinking you need to have a harem of five or six supermodels in order to be âsuccessful.â And if thatâs your eventual goal, thatâs fine, but Iâm sure that isnât your baseline minimum. One or two cute girls are probably all you need at the moment (though I could be wrong; every man is different).

2. Maybe this isnât the time to focus on your woman life.

Now that youâve defined your minimums, you may find that you already have them in place(!). Remember, if youâre really busy, the minimums are all you need right now. You may determine that, for right now, you need to focus on some other goals. Maybe you need to get your new location independent consulting business started. Maybe you need to focus on losing 40 pounds. Maybe you need to spend the next three months studying hard for that certification you really need to hit your business or career goals. Maybe a loved one just came down with cancer and you need to focus on them for a few weeks.

As Iâve talked about before, there have been many times throughout my life where I put my woman life on the back burner so I could focus on other critical areas of my life that needed my time, usually my business/financial life. This is perfectly fine as long as youâve met your minimums.

I do not recommend this âmonk modeâ bullshit where you just donât have sex for a year while you build your business or whatever. Jesus fuck. I did that shit way back in my early twenties and it was a serious mistake. No, you need to have sex at least occasionally, as I talked about here. Get one or two distant FBs, get laid at least a few times a month, then forget about any woman life improvements for now and get to work.

3. You MUST give something up temporarily.

I mentioned this in part one of this article but I need to be more specific here. If you havenât yet met your minimums or youâve decided to focus on the woman side of your life right now and get really good at it, then if youâre a busy guy, you MUST temporarily back off on one or more areas. You MUST do this. You canât do it all.

If you spend two hours a day in the gym six days a week, temporarily back it down to one hour three days a week so you can maintain. And before you say it, no, you wonât lose any muscle mass by doing this, so spare me the bullshit excuses.

If you have a woman who youâre seeing more than once a week (which is a direct violation of the Cardinal Rules so you shouldnât be doing this anyway unless sheâs an OLTR), knock it down to once a week so you can focus on getting some more women (or better women) and/or improve your dating skills. If she really bitches about it, you know what to do: instant soft next! Once youâve mastered all the woman skills you want, then you can settle down (literally or figuratively) with an OLTR if you want, but now is not the time!

You get the idea. Remember, this is temporary only! In six or twelve months or whatever, you can shift back to this activity if you wish.

4. Focus on one game style.

Iâve said this many times before so Iâll just summarize it. Pick ONE style of game to focus and get good at. Night game, daygame, online dating, social circle game, I donât care which one it is, just pick ONE and focus on ONE. Donât try to do two or three of these unless youâre already a master of at least one of them.

Mastery is about focus. Itâs not about spreading your energies all over the place.

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Alpha Male 2.0 World Tour 2019