TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

Rebuilding the mound

Dalrock
February 8, 2013

img-1685878146-647c7582ecf061.48718045.gif

Once you understand the nature of the fire ant colony you can provoke them in relative safety.  The fierce response to any disturbance of the mound is entirely predictable.  The ants simply have no choice in the matter.  Poke the mound and they come storming out, furiously stinging and attempting to restore the mound to its previous shape.

You can witness the same thing whenever discussing issues which offend the feminine imperative.  Much of what we do in the manosphere is knock down the false frame of feminism.  In fact, we generally need to focus more on the frame than the facts because the facts are indisputably on our side.  However, even when the focus is on the facts, the response from the feminine imperative is the same;  out boil the ants to rebuild the frame.

In the discussion of my post A Tale of Two Beaches, commenter T provided an excellent example of this.  She immediately set out to rebuild the frame of Sheila’s Now Hear This post (the picture alone says it all).  I’ve excerpted several comments below so you will need to see the original discussion for full context, but the excerpts show T’s constant reframing of the discussion to the idea that compliance is sexy, and the corollary; husbands who don’t comply are repulsive losers who ultimately risk frivorce.  Note that each segment separated by ‘…’ is from a separate comment.  This isn’t a series of excerpts from just one or a few comments.  To her credit, T held on to the compliance is sexy frame through to her final comment in the discussion:

So are the things that Shelia Gregorie mentions in her post unreasonable?

I saw most of that list as things that husbands should be doing anyway. So the problem is that she doesn’t say that even if he doesn’t bother with any of that, then she should still have sex.

Having to do this causes vaginal dryness. Just FYI.

But a wife whose husband doesn’t do most of those things actually isn’t going to be happy. Although I agree that she shouldn’t withhold sex no matter how she feels, a husband who doesn’t do some of those things is a turnoff.

Having to explain what you want to someone who is sexually incompetent (and a man who can’t find a clit and doesn’t know what it is for is incompetent ) is not sexy.

However I do think that a husband who doesn’t do the stuff that she listed is likely to actually turn his wife off.

Not turning her off and being a good husband?

I think that whether they are valid prerequisites to ungrudging sex is irrelevant for practical purposes. Most women won’t be able to have enthusiastic sex with a husband who is lacking in many of these areas. You can tell her that her prerequisites are invalid and she will tell you that you’ve turned her off. She may grab some lube and fake it for you if she believes that she owes that to you, but it isn’t going to get you a mutually satisfying sex life.

Sex is not just physical for some women, it’s emotional as well. Before I developed some emotional control if my feelings were hurt, or I wasn’t feeling loved at the moment I didn’t want sex and couldn’t enjoy it if I had it anyway.

I have told friends that there is no reason to deny sex and that their marriages will probably improve if they are sexually generous with their husbands. That doesn’t change the fact that sex can be difficult for women to enjoy when they aren’t feeling good about their relationship.

This is exactly the reason that many women “frivorce”. They look at their husbands, see someone who creates more housework than he does, doesn’t meet her emotional needs and wants sex while not being sexy. If she’s already going to work and dropping her kids off at daycare then he is also redundant.

The problem for men is that we tend to respond to fairly obvious reframes as if they were an attempt at a logical argument.  It isn’t that responding to these reframes is never a good idea, but that you should always be aware of what is going on.  Either way, in this case T’s problem was the framing of the OP was overwhelming.  No amount of petty shaming would change the fact that no woman reading would want to associate her sexuality with Field Marshal Gregoire (left) instead of Mrs. Yes (right).

img-1685878152-647c7588104419.20224723.jpg

Which kind of wife are you?

One thing which is worth noting is that when the ants are rebuilding the mound they generally aren’t aware of what they are doing.  Women absolutely can argue logically, but certain topics have a tendency to bring out a little known module of the rationalization hamster, the emotion to logic converter.  When this module is engaged what comes out is structured in the form of a logical argument, but it is really just emotion in translation.

Private beach image licensed as creative commons by Jarrod Trainque.  Standing Guard image licensed as creative commons by the German Federal Archive.

TheRedArchive is an archive of Red Pill content, including various subreddits and blogs. This post has been archived from the blog Dalrock.

Dalrock archive

Download the post

Want to save the post for offline use on your device? Choose one of the download options below:

Post Information
Title Rebuilding the mound
Author Dalrock
Date February 8, 2013 11:47 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Blog Dalrock
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/blog/Dalrock/rebuilding-the-mound.8010
https://theredarchive.com/blog/8010
Original Link https://dalrock.wordpress.com/2013/02/08/rebuilding-the-mound/
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2024. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter