What is so striking about the modern Christian rationalization of the feminist life script is how much further Christians take it than secular feminists. This seems to be an artifact of claiming that the results of feminism and the sexual revolution are actually God’s will. For example, Christian women have adopted the same “never settle” mantra in their twenties that secular women have, but Christian women claim God is telling them to never settle. Wendy Griffith literally wrote the book on this, but you can see her making the same claim in this video:
Griffith: If we don’t know that, again we’ll settle for much less. You know it breaks God’s heart when we settle. And that’s the other thing that the Lord taught me through the heartbreak was God hates compromise! He hates it when we settle, because He’s a good daddy, he wants to give his daughters – and his sons – His very best. And He’ll let us settle if we ignore all the red flags and if we keep going He’ll say ok but He desperately doesn’t want us to settle. He want’s us to hold out for His best.
More recently Griffith described God’s direct instruction to her to follow the feminist life script. Unlike secular feminists who focus on marrying by their mid thirties (late thirties at worst), Griffith has taken this into her 50s.
Now, God had told me in my late thirties … I had a very clear word from the Lord that I would have to wait for my husband. And I was having a great time. I didn’t even want to get married then because I was traveling all over the world, and doing exciting stories for CBN, and my TV career was taking off. But when I turned 40, I remember driving down the road and screaming. And it wasn’t necessarily a good scream. It was sort of like, “Okay, God, where is he?” But it wasn’t time. I was rushing it. Little did I know, you know, that I would be, you know, well into my fifties.
Griffith then explains that God has finally provided the man He told her to wait for:
But, I’m telling you, Joel 2, Doug, God restores the years. I wouldn’t trade anything. You know, Bill, my boyfriend now, is 5 years older than me. Well, he’s 4-1/2 and, I don’t know, it’s perfect.
That was a year ago, making them 54 and 59 now!* Contrast that with the secular feminist warning to young women not to ride the carousel too long, and to settle in their thirties, when the settling is good. Also keep in mind that Griffith isn’t claiming God had a fairly unique life script in mind for her by having her delay marriage until (it would appear) her late 50s. Griffith is selling “God hates it when you settle” to Christian women across the board.
Christian women have also adopted the same empowerment message that goes along with the feminist life script. The more empowered a Christian woman is in her “season of singleness”, the better her Christian marriage will ultimately be! See never married Wendy Griffith (now 54) and never married Mandy Hale (now 40) discussing how to be successful in marriage at the 700 Club:
Hale: As long as you’re in this moment, as a single woman, loving yourself, thriving where you are at, deciding to live as big and bold and brave of a life as you can, regardless of whether you are flying solo or not.
Griffith: Now, how is being happily single a precursor to being happily taken?
Hale: I think it’s all about realizing that your self worth and your value is really based on what’s inside you and not in who is standing beside you. And I think, I’ve heard quotes that talk about, your married life can only be as successful as your single life. And so I think you really just work on as a single person becoming all the things you hope to attract in another person, you can’t go wrong.
Griffith: And Mandy I love what you said, you said “Stop looking for a hero and become your own hero.” How do you do that?
You can see the exchange between Griffith and Hale here:
You also see all of the same kind of vacuous social media messages aimed at women, but these are presented as Christian, if not God’s will.
As a sign of just how far Christian women are taking this, note that the last tweet by Hale points to an article she wrote for the AARP: Party Of One: Learning To Be Alone And To Like It
*Correction: I originally had the ages of Wendy and Bill as 55 and 60, instead of 54 and 59.
