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That the word of God be not blasphemed

March 6, 2018

As bad as Stephen Arterburn and Fred Stoeker come off in Every Man’s Marriage, I think Brenda Stoeker comes off the worst. None of this is intentional, as Stephen and Fred are supposed to come off bad for having not obeyed their wives’ soul-essences not for creating a mystic vagina worship religion, and Brenda isn’t supposed to come off bad at all.

Yet as Fred describes how they met and married followed by Brenda completely shattering his will, the picture he paints of her becomes one of a pathologically manipulative woman. Fred tells us that early in the marriage he at times sinned by resisting her will.  That ended when Brenda crushed him completely:

Long ago, when my parents’ divorce loomed over my life, a merciless question swirled over and over within my frightened heart.  What are we going to do?  I asked myself.  What are we going to do?

Brenda’s words [that her feelings were gone] brought the question sweeping back, with an even more personal twist.

…Waves of panic washed over me for days, buckling me in unguarded moments.

Fred then agreed to submit to Brenda, first regarding his family, and eventually in everything.  Fred tells us he knew he was dealing with something extraordinary here because making him submit was far more gratifying to Brenda than he would have expected:

Still, I was very confused.  Why was this working?  All along, I thought Scripture taught that women were supposed to submit to their husbands.  Why did my submission revive the marriage this way?  And why was the impact of my decision so huge and dramatic? With the family issues, I thought we’d just been dealing with a simple conflict of wills.  But the scale of the turnaround suggested something much deeper had been going on between us.

Fred tells us that when he finally found a hobby he absolutely loved (upland bird hunting), Brenda’s reaction was to tell him he could only spend two days a year on it:

“Sweetheart, you can’t imagine how good it makes me feel to know you’ve found a hobby you love,” she began.  “You’ve needed one for a long time, but you need to understand what this means to my life.  Hunting means I’ll have to handle the kids six days a week all by myself.  Besides, what good are Saturdays without the fun you bring to the mix?

She continued, “Since you like hunting this much, we should agree now how many times per year you can go.  This way, you won’t be tempted to stretch it when your buddies call.”

Fred suggested three days a year was a reasonable number.  Brenda told him he could have two.  After some back and forth, Fred obeyed her mystical soul essence and agreed to only spend two days a year on the hobby he absolutely loved.

But the most damning things Fred says about Brenda involve the lessons she has taught him and the way he tells us he has come to see her.  Fred is teaching other men what his master Brenda taught him:

Oneness has terms. Comply with the terms and emotional closeness follows. If you don’t comply, the emotions will die.

Try reading that out loud a few times.  Keep in mind for Fred this isn’t just about sex.  When Brenda’s “feelings die”, he goes into a debilitating panic.  He can’t breath until he has regained her approval.

One of the first things Brenda did was take complete control of how, when, and how often Fred interacted with his family.  This of course would fall under the catch all rule of obeying her soul essence, but for Brenda this was especially important.  Fred explains with all seriousness:

You see, Brenda has the gift of discernment. When it comes to family relationships, she knows the good from the bad (Christianity stretches back at least four generations into every branch of her family tree), and what she saw in our in-law relationships made her uncomfortable.

What would happen if Fred were in contact with his family against Brenda’s wishes?

Oneness has terms. Comply with the terms and emotional closeness follows. If you don’t comply, the emotions will die.

Brenda also decides how Fred spends every minute of the day (Chapter 9).

Oneness has terms. Comply with the terms and emotional closeness follows. If you don’t comply, the emotions will die.

She decides what he watches on TV (Chapter 8).

Oneness has terms. Comply with the terms and emotional closeness follows. If you don’t comply, the emotions will die.

And when and how he should bathe and wash his face (Chapter 8).

Oneness has terms. Comply with the terms and emotional closeness follows. If you don’t comply, the emotions will die.

In the Old Testament a Hebrew slave had to be freed by his master after six years.  However, if at that time the slave wished to remain a slave, he could elect to remain the master’s slave for life.  The master would then drive an awl through the slave’s ear on his master’s door post as a lifetime mark of this decision.  In Chapter 7 Fred offers this story as the picture of his marriage to Brenda.

Setting his lobe to the post, he joyously receives the mark, submitting his rights and future for the honor of serving and pleasing his master for as long as he lives.

This Old Testament scene suggests another picture that I’ll paint for you.  One day my eyes opened to see Brenda before me, a woman I’d never known.  Seeing value in me, she paid a dear price to have me as her own, giving up her freedom to seek any other to have or to hold.  I returned this love, happily receiving the mark of a golden ring that told everyone I was now hers.  She was my “master,” to whom I was forever pledged to serve.

TheRedArchive is an archive of Red Pill content, including various subreddits and blogs. This post has been archived from the blog Dalrock.

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Post Information
Title That the word of God be not blasphemed
Author Dalrock
Date March 6, 2018 4:17 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Blog Dalrock
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/blog/Dalrock/that-the-word-of-god-be-notblasphemed.7094
Original Link https://dalrock.wordpress.com/2018/03/06/that-the-word-of-god-be-not-blasphemed/
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