Regular readers will be familiar with the cute Italian who added me by mistake on Facebook and I’ve been gaming since. It’s now at the stage where she opens me every single time she sees me online and sometimes messages inbetween. It would appear she’s getting addicted to the dopamine rushes of our chats. We haven’t met yet but once we do it’s on. We’ve already been swapping sexual fantasies.
Most of the chats of bantering with droppings of comfort. This girl responds far better to pushes than to pulls so I’m usually hitting her with four or five pushes for every pull, then moving into comfort whenever possible (because that’s lacking). Here’s an example when she invited me to a party one Friday night:
Me: ok     keep the tickets for me, and I’ll let you know after I spoke to my friends
Her: but i need to know asap
Me: tomorrow morning ok to tell you?
Her: yes     u have time til this friday     as too late!
Me: don’t worry     little smelly Italian girl…..
Her: i’m not smelly anymore
Me: you smell like a pack of rats     living under a bridge     in a storm
Her: whaat      i’m smelling like flowers
Me: I smell like flowers     you smell like old socks
Her: my old socks smell like flowers
Me: you made a mistake     you mean your flowers smell like old socks
Her: no     i dnr have flowers
We never did go to the club but as usual she’s hitting me up on facebook almost every day. Here’s a chat from a week later.
Her: oioioiooiioioi     hahaha
Me: still avoiding doing any work, I see
Her: heeeeey i’m off today!!!     sometimes, i’m off ok! hahaha
Me: aha, I remember now      having fun?
Her: not yet
Me: I’m going to Kew Gardens today     very cultural     I must be a culturally sophisticated gentleman
Her: hahahahahha     yes…     ive never been there
Me: they wouldn’t let you in     culturally sophisticated people only     no troublemakers
Her: whaaat      i’m not a troublemaker!     and i’m more sophisticated than you
Me: I’m sure you’ve said that many times, after being caught with your hand in the cookie jar
Her: hahahha     noo     stop talking about you
Me: I cause trouble     I don’t deny it     I’ve been interviewed by police more times than I’ve been interviewed for jobs
Her: hahahahhahahahha     so you are totally trouble
Me: not totally
Her: i’m too lazy today     and i have to do lots of things     pffffff     u should come and do it for me
Me: no     I just had a shower     I smell like a cool summer breeze as it blows across a field of daisies
Her: dirty socks you mean…
Me: you smell like a dead mouse in the corner of a dirty room
Her: hahahaha     have you even smelled one?
Me: yes, in Italy     in your best hotel
Her: hahahaha     our hotels are better than the english ones… i dnt want to imagine about the smell of the dead mouses here…
Me: what are you wearing?
Her: pyjama     well     kind of
Me: shorts or trousers?
Her: shorts
Me: what colour underwear?
Her: i dnt wear underwear when i sleep
Me: me neither
Her: so..    i go for a shower    if u wanna join me the door will be opened     hahahha
Me: already had a shower    but thanks for the offer
Her: back
Me: cool    but I am going out now, to watch Thor in the cinema    take a photo before you put your clothes on    and send it to me    I’ll check it out when I get back    have a great day
She’s given me two lingerie photos. It’s trundling along nicely but I’m careful not to put too much effort into her seeing as she’s quite a time waster. I’ll just keep letting her open me while I’m doing other things online. My guess is 40% chance of sex.