~ archived since 2018 ~

Don't Try to Be One of The Guys

February 16, 2012
TIME and TIME again I meet girls that try to set themselves apart from other women by identifying with men, hanging out with men and professing to be OK with all the fucked up stuff guys do to girls. This takes many forms. Here are some of the more common examples:

  • Having only or mostly guy friends
  • Claiming that "girls are too bitchy and emotional, guys are just easier to get along with"
  • Laughing at stories about guys treating girls like shit
  • Scoffing at girls that get upset or "overreact" when a guy breaks up with them
  • Being proud of the ability to drink a lot, or to drink strong liquor
  • Pretending to be OK with just hooking up or just having sex with a guy
  • Being proud of her one night stands, and telling stories about them openly
  • Not making demands of a potential boyfriend because "it's no big deal"

Yes, these things do get positive responses from men. However, in the same sense that any attention is not necessarily good attention (a lesson many men need to learn), any attraction is not necessarily romantic or even sexual attraction. The men that laugh at these comments or encourage your drinking feel the same kind of attraction for you that they feel for their buddies: casual, asexual, platonic camaraderie. If this sounds like the kind of attention you want from men, keep it up.

To put the phenomenon in perspective, consider a guy that tries to attract you by constantly identifying with you, hanging out only with girls, and professing to like the things girls like or do. I have witnessed a lot of men who do exactly this. For example,

  • Talking with girls about how "guys can be such assholes" (implying, of course, that he is different - which is probably true enough, but really beside the point)
  • Being the shoulder for the girl to cry on when the guy she actually likes rejects her
  • Admitting that he likes sentimental movies and even that cries sometimes because he is sensitive
  • Pretending he likes the same music as a girl, even if it is gay
  • Pretending that he cares more about her personality than her appearance - or at least (because it is at least conceivable that some men do care less for looks than personality), pretending he cares less about looks than he really does

All of this behaviour - in both men and women - is rooted in projection but ultimately is caused by a failure to differentiate between romantic and platonic affection. When you act like a man and constantly try to identify with him, you will attract him no more than the actions that I've just described attract you.

As obvious as it is, I think it bears repeating that men are attracted to women, not men. While they might complain about a girl who is "too emotional" or "a prude," there are ways of correcting feminine faults without reverting to masculine behavior.

TheRedArchive is an archive of Red Pill content, including various subreddits and blogs. This post has been archived from the blog The Rules Revisited.

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