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What Men Think About Older Women

Andrew
February 5, 2012
I spent about a year dating almost exclusively women older than myself. What follows are my observations from that time in my life. For the purpose of this post, by "older women" I do not mean old women or women of any certain age or age range; I mainly mean women who are older than the man in question.

Older women are easier to have sex with. 
Older women are more confident and comfortable around men - especially younger men, since they know that their experience cancels out some of his natural power over her. This translates into sexual openness. Some men know that older women are easier to nail, which is often why they pursue them. Older women should be cynical about younger men who claim they want to date seriously, or remain silent about commitment.

Older women are not as physically attractive as younger women.
This is obvious. Women peak somewhere in their twenties for external attractiveness. All honest men acknowledge this, as do most women. In general, men disagree about the age at which women "peak" - partially because it varies depending on the woman and partially because guys have different taste. But I think it also has to do with the difficulty that men have distinguishing between external and internal attractiveness; often the latter is confused for the former.

Older women are still pretty hot. A woman's attractiveness doesn't take a swan dive after 30. It tapers out slowly and often quite gracefully - far more slowly than it arises in a girl's late teens. The rate of the decline is obviously affected by her genetics and lifestyle, but it is also largely a function of how willing she is to accept that decline gracefully. I think the women who become ugliest due to age are the ones that recognize they are getting older, wrongly assume that they are no longer beautiful, and therefore stop their gym membership, cut their hair short and give up. Some women go instead to the opposite extreme, getting plastic surgery or increasing their make up until they over-compensate. Neither of these is the appropriate or confident response to the onset of aging (in the same way that wearing a toupee is a poor response to the onset of male baldness, for example). An acceptance of reality is the best response, and the reality is not nearly as bad as so many women believe. Although most men of course prefer the looks or bodies of women in their twenties, we would still love to fuck those same women well into their forties - assuming they take care of themselves.

Guys interested in long term relationships will not consider older women seriously.
On a few occasions I was dating women who were older by six to ten years, and really enjoyed their beauty and company. However, when it came time to cut it off or have a relationship, I cut it off. Reconsidering my motivations for those decisions now, I recognize one that dominated the others: despite my attraction for those women at the time, I didn't want to look around myself ten years later and see a hotter, younger girl - closer to my own age - and think "I could have been with a girl like that instead." When my wife starts aging, I want the other girls I could have had (i.e. those in my age-range) to be aging with her, so that I won't be constantly reminded of the sacrifice I made to be with her - even if it was one I know was worth it. The grass is already always greener on the other side, and a man doesn't need an age disparity contributing to that effect when his woman starts losing her initial shine.

Older women are more internally attractive than younger women. 
Older women have miles more personality than younger women. Since the time when I dated older women (a couple years ago now), I've found one, maybe two girls younger than me that I was attracted to and able to connect with - out of all the women I've encountered or even dated. Older women are simply more interesting to be around. This is because of the natural accumulation of experiences over time. Older women are more confident than younger women, because they know themselves and the world better. Their words carry more weight because they have experienced what they are talking about. They are comfortable in their own skin. They are relaxed in social settings. Perhaps most importantly, they are not afraid of men, so their inhibitions in a man's presence are less severe. All of this allows for an openness that makes a date or casual interaction much more enjoyable.


Related Posts
1. Your Age and Your Attractiveness
2. Some Older Women Are Smart
3. Don't Let a Guy Waste Your Most Eligible Years

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