When a man rejects a woman, her desire to get him back usually consists of two parts:
(a) her desire to be with a man she really values and is attracted to, andIn my experience, women are often (if not usually) motivated more by (b) than they are by (a). That is, they want to regain their pride more than they actually want to be with the guy in question. I've had a number of women even tell me (after taking a moment to think about it) that the guy they want back so badly is nothing like the man they imagine themselves marrying. In some cases, they admit that they probably would have ended things with him if he hadn't done it first - or even that they can see themselves ending things sometime down the road if he takes her back. Their authentic desire to be with him is rarely the motivating factor for wanting him back - even if it still plays a small part.
(b) her desire to prove that, deep down, he actually does want her.
So before you drive yourself crazy trying to salvage a newly-ended relationship, think for a moment about your motivations: do you really want to be with him, or are you just trying to fix your wounded pride? Because your pride will naturally heal over time. But forcing yourself back into a relationship that he chose to end once already is a good recipe for having him end it again, which will just scar your ego further.
By acknowledging your real motivations, you will make it easier to come to terms with the breakup and be able to move on as quickly as possible.
If you liked this post, you'll definitely like my book, Beyond the Breakup, which says a lot more about understanding your mindset and your ex's in the wake of a breakup.
1. Why Rejection Is a Good Thing
2. Get Used to Rejection
3. Don't Initiate Contact
4. Know Why You Are Dating