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January 29, 2014

Hi, I'm /u/margerym; a former feminist turned submissive wife turned onto Red Pill after reading Red Pill Room over my husband's shoulder nearly a year ago. I blog about our marriage, working towards being more feminine, and the problem(s) with feminism at Margery + The Man and am a contributor at Girls Being Girls, a community of women embracing femininity. Feel free to ask me anything!

/u/Phantomdream09: This is a very strange experience for me, mainly because I didn’t even know what reddit was until my SO, OccamsUsername, sent me a link to the Red Pill Women sub. I poked around a bit, and the more I read, the happier I felt. I made an account that day solely to comment on one thread…and I haven’t really shut-up since. I’m the newest member to join the RPW Moderating team, and it’s been a lot of fun getting to peek behind the curtain and see how things work. Gentlemen, please feel free to ask me anything. :0)

Hi, I’m /u/TempestTcup and I have been a moderator at /r/RedPillWomen since almost the very beginning. I have a blog at TempestTcup and I also write for Girls Being Girls. I just celebrated my 20th wedding anniversary and my 30th year of being with my husband. I found the Red Pill, liked the idea of a RP relationship, and fed the RP to my husband. We are really enjoying it!

Post Information
Author redpillschool
Upvotes 143
Comments 485
Date 29 January 2014 09:07 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit TheRedPill
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the red pillfeministfeminism

[–][deleted] 16 points17 points  (31 children) | Copy

What would you do if your daughter came home with a PUA?

[–][deleted] 22 points23 points  (14 children) | Copy

Kick him out, sit her down, and have her read some of the entries on TRP. This space is definitely for men, and I respect that. I only comment when and where I think I can contribute productively to the conversation, which means there are a lot of threads I simply ignore or click out of. I support TRP sub, but that's not the same as saying I agree with everything that goes on here.


[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (12 children) | Copy

How would you even know the guy your daughter was dating was a player/PUA? It's not like they all dress like Mystery.

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points  (11 children) | Copy

Well, if they're not in a committed/exclusive relationship - I'm going to have a problem. Also, if I had a daughter, I'd keep her so busy and focused on school/sports/clubs that she wouldn't really care about guys until college or later. If you teach her certain values, she won't fall into the player trap.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (3 children) | Copy

If you teach her certain values, she won't fall into the player trap.

You can only hope. I grew up in a family that held traditional values, and my parents worked hard to instill these values in us. I have three sisters, two of them don't date players, and one seems to be capable of only dating players.

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[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah, so one of my other sister's is now a rad-fem lesbian. She used to be normal, and date normal men. But at some point in her late twenties she became a lot more immature and started doing a bunch of weird shit. She has quite a few ugly tattoos now and lives with her girlfriend and her girlfriend's husband.

I do have one sister who is completely normal and has a really smart and awesome boyfriend she's been dating for three years now.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

You can only do so much. If I had a daughter, and my best wasn't enough, I'd be disappointed, but some people only learn through their (sometimes repeated) mistakes. All I know is that this worked for me. My family gave me the tools, all I had to do was be patient and not screw-it up.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy

I think trying to keep her busy, or even not allowing her date would be counter-productive. I mean, if you tell a teenager they can't do something, what are they going to do? They're going to go do it.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (3 children) | Copy

Again, this goes to instilling boundaries and respect. I always respected my parents, and I wasn't allowed to date until I was 16. It was never a problem and I didn't have the interest to even try until I was 18. The child's personality is going to play a huge role in this as well.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

You never even had the quasi-secret-boyfriend, the guy you would only hold hands with?

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

HAH! When you're playing 3+ sports, and you're on the road every weekend for another game or tournament while juggling a full class load - the thing you usually want most in the world is your bed and eight more hours of sleep. :0)

I got along just fine with everyone, but I was honestly more interested in sports. I had goals I was pursuing, and I didn't get distracted. I went to some school dances, and they were fun. I didn't go to house parties, or drink. I had guy friends, but wasn't attracted to them, in fact the thought never crossed my mind. I had a crush or two, but I was also pretty shy. The male counterpart to one of the sports I played always came to our games, yet I didn't really know any of them all that well. I'm sure there were opportunities that I could have pursued if I were interested, but I wasn't so I didn't.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Fair enough.

[–]1FloranHunter2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Keeping her busy but not telling her why wouldn't trigger her rebelliousness so long as she feels in control of her decisions. Telling her to play soccer and not kiss boys sure would though.

[–]pony11080 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

People have been doing this for ages. "I would instill values in her head, forbid her from seeing this guy or that guy, kick some sense into her, blablabla." You may love catering and deferring to your husband, embrace the red pill in your marriage but it's NOT for everyone. I realize it's a lifestyle that may suit many people well, but the humankind is extremely diverse and every person is different. Parents have been trying to shove their values down their kids' throats for generations. Same thing has been happening and will continue happening - some of the kids will be good kids and do what their parents say, but the rest (most) will do exactly THE OPPOSITE of what you want, and sometimes just to spite you. I understand embracing a certain lifestyle, but why push it on others, if they don't want it?

What I agree that is wrong in the world: the sluts, and guys who chase the sluts. But if there is a woman is simply more dominant and finds a guy who is comfortable with having her taking care of things? Is that so hard to believe? ...That functional relationships can exist based on this scheme? I think it's feasible - and moronic to believe that everyone should conform to the one and only, red pill lifestyle.

Why do you (not YOU per se but one of you RPW mods) feel sorry for men? Everyone is here on this planet for themselves, everyone is given a life that they can do whatever they please with. There is enough women for all men to choose from. There are nasty, rotten apples in both genders. Nobody is an end to another person's means. Nobody should feel bad for anyone. Everyone has a fair chance and everyone should be able to choose the path they want and try as hard as possible to not make others miserable as they go through life. Too many of the angry men are simply men who have failed (YES FAILED) and post whiny, bitchy rants that still reek of "betaness"... Half of the men who claim they swallowed the red pill still sound "beta" as fuck and just simply delusional... You want to be a happy, functional being? Get off of reddit and do something for your life instead of blaming women for your own failures... That being said, there are also many smart and reasonable individuals on here who give valuable and sound advice to others..

Finally, some of you, and the people here on TRP give way too much credit to the guys on here. How do you know the guy typing out this angry rant is not some fat loser with a bad hygiene or some other mental, physical or social deformity, who has a sense of entitlement way bigger than the assets he brings to the table? I'm sorry but I will never, EVER believe that all these "poor" guys on here are some great, wonderful, innocent men getting screwed by ruthless sluts who are just running amok on the world. If you can't get a right woman, or a functional relationship, that means there is something wrong with you. Male or female.

[–]RPW Mmargerym20 points21 points  (0 children) | Copy

No doubt her father would have words for her.

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[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (6 children) | Copy

Not necessarily. If anything, it means he's good at keeping appearances, like I was, or was a Beta.

I think the important thing would be to instill RPW values in a daughter, and teach her to keep a man interested without giving up sex off the bat.

The hard part about this is the fact most young men are only looking for sex. At twenty-three, I'm only interested in flings. If a girl isn't putting out for me, I'm done. And this is the dilemma a young RPW faces.

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[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (4 children) | Copy

So how do you teach your daughter to go look for an Alpha with ethics, vice an Alpha who subscribes to Dark Triad behaviour?

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[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

I really hope I never have a daughter. I'd be stressing my ass off.

[–]haiimaperson0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yup. I am so thankful I have a son, and so is my husband. We were both like "please don't let it be a girl" before we had the gender ultrasound.

[–]enticingasthatmaybe1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

my husband would step in and put the unholy fear of jesus in the guy and then I would have to sit my daughter down for a long talk.

She's still going to bang the dude... even more so not that it is forbidden

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[–]enticingasthatmaybe1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

You're right, it's all about education. I have a nine year old so I'm not looking forward to the day guys like me start sniffing around... Cause I've seen me do some jacked up shit.

[–]drok00715 points16 points  (33 children) | Copy

What are the largest issues that women adopting the red pill need to identify and change, and what types of examples do you use to show them results on these mindset/lifestyle changes?

For example, many new people reading the red pill realize how their behaviors are blue pill or beta, and they make corrections to change it. There are also tons of examples of blue pill behavior ending terribly, while showing that adopting a red pill view will bring success and happiness.

On our end, we see entitled women getting what they want a lot. What motivates you to not be a part of that?

I'm also curious about your backgrounds. Do you have any sort of ideas about what your political and religious ideologies are of your subscribers or maybe a general idea of what the majority tend to fall towards? Age range, income, occupations, things like that as well?

BTW my girlfriend likes your community, but I don't know many other women who seem like they would fit. Women like you seem rather rare at the moment.

Thanks for your responses!

Edit: Left out a word.

[–]RPW ECFleetingWish18 points19 points  (9 children) | Copy

Not mod, but regular.

Between us we actually have a lot of differences. There's only a few of us, but I haven't noticed any common occurrences.

I think what motivates all of us though is wanting to make our men happy. I think of you want to look at it from a more selfish angle, you could say that when we make our men happy, the kind of men we're attracted to are more likely to stick around, we get happier relationships, and the sense of satisfaction that comes with making someone you care about happy.

I read an article saying that women like us are becoming more and more common. And it asked where are we coming from, and why now? I don't know if that's true or not, but if it was, maybe it's people waking up to the fact that feminism isn't working to get them what they want.

[–]drok0075 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

That's refreshing to hear. It's odd that what humanity has done for most of its existence because it's natural and biologically rooted, needs to make a comeback.

[–]marlybarrow2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Could you provide a link to the article?

[–]RPW ECFleetingWish0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I should have specified, it's not a scientific article by any means. It's just a feminist making an off hand observation, but here's the link anyway.

[–][deleted] 27 points28 points  (5 children) | Copy

I think a lot of women think being a Red Pill woman means that they will have no power. That it will lead to resentment, abuse, or that they have to defer to every single person they meet. None of that is the case. It's important to help them see that acting out like a snotty brat may have immediate rewards for a while, but it doesn't make them good candidates for LTR's or marriages. Also, many women realize they are unhappy, but don't want to admit they role they play in creating a toxic relationship. It can be a humbling experience for many women, and it's definitely a process.

I had a very traditional upbringing (but non-religious). My father was was the leader, and my mother helped. I was taught to think for myself, show respect for my elders, and be kind. Sports and being physically active were a main focus in my life for a very long time, and I saw a lot of really cruddy behavior from both men and women. Seeing all the drama and rotten attitudes of my female peers really solidified certain things for me. I was never attracted to parties, drinking, or clubs, and I'm not in the least bit rebellious - so maybe that helped.

I'm glad your GF enjoys the RPW sub! She should create an account and say hello.


[–]drok0078 points9 points  (4 children) | Copy

Will do. She has an account but I believe she mostly just lurks on all of reddit and hasn't actually posted anything yet. The other day, she said she found an article she thought RPW would appreciate. She is a social worker, so it was something pertaining to that. I'll follow up, and get her to be active.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

tell her to get her ass over to RPW!

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yes! Please do!

[–]RPW Mmargerym10 points11 points  (1 child) | Copy

Please let us know who she is, too, so we don't vet her as ruthlessly as we do others. ;)

[–]drok0075 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

She was originally using /u/Nicanooni but she might change to /u/Nicanooni13 if she can't remember her login info.

She says you all take the words right out of her mouth on most issues, so I'm sure she will fit right in haha.

[–]TempestTcup15 points16 points  (16 children) | Copy

The biggest issue to taking the red pill is making women realize that their husbands are the most important people in their lives and should be treated as such. They need to put their husbands first in their lives.

Entitled women do get what they want short-term, but what about over the long haul?

Our subscribers are all over the place - all ages, all backgrounds, ethnicities, marital status, etc.

[–]drok0074 points5 points  (15 children) | Copy

It just seems possible with the way society is, that some women could hamster their way to the grave with their entitlement. Ride the carousel, settle for some providing chump, don't keep up their end of the commitment, cheat on him, and just go around the whole time believing they are in their right. I'm just wondering what breaks that in a good woman.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is very simplified but: upbringing (a good childhood can instil certain values, while a bad childhood may drive some girls to become good women - although I know the latter is much harder and less likely) and personality (if a woman isn't happy with who she is as person - she will never stop looking for validation from other people...and multiple men).

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[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

hear, hear

[–]j_arbuckle20120 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

So, no responsibility, or agency, or choice? Just a good man. No need to take responsibility for yourself and your actions, just wait on a good guy to come and put you in your place! That's all you'll ever need.

Right. /s

[–]Gyaltso0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Men are the proactive force.. In large part, the woman you are with will react to whatever kind of man she perceives you to be.

[–]TempestTcup2 points3 points  (8 children) | Copy

I do know a lot of the older entitled women and yes they still get what they need because there are an endless number of guys who would love a relationship but are unable to attract a higher value woman. Lol, I even found out recently that one of the eldersluts I know is now an escort at the ripe old age of 45!

If you look around flyover land, you will notice that there are a huge amount of women who do not do this. I know a lot of very long term relationships. I couldn't tell you about the big cities though, life there seems to garner a lot of restlessness and competition.

[–]TRP VanguardYouDislikeMyOpinion2 points3 points  (7 children) | Copy

This makes me wonder, are most of you ladies at RPW from flyover land or from big cities?

[–]TempestTcup2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Flyover here, or as I like to call it: The Great NorthAmerican Outback :)

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[–]Ruthydugs1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yorkshire, North of England

New RPW but have made some contributions, the tipping point was not wanting to end up like my mum and dad , she used him as a doormat and I always knew she didn't treat him well but not until I found my BF did I realise how I could avoid making the same mistakes and RPW fits my relationship beliefs.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy

Philly born and bred

[–]drok0071 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Philly, nice. Northern DE here. Good to see some of us are living the dream even in the big cities haha.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Our dream is to move to Montana the day before Philly is nuked

[–]enticingasthatmaybe1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Philly born and bred

...on the playground is where I spent most of my days

[–]heist_of_saint_graft33 points34 points  (21 children) | Copy

Are any of you raising daughters? What advice do you give them, or would you give them if you had a daughter?

[–]RPW Mmargerym40 points41 points  (15 children) | Copy

Yes, we are. Currently they are too young for any "sit down" advice but we already are telling them marrying young is ideal, to stay healthy and fit, to respect men, etc. I try and lead by example, mostly. But we also want them to know that men and marriage are worthwhile and so they need to be worthwhile themselves, not just expect everything to come to them.

[–]TRP__22 points23 points  (11 children) | Copy

Why do you consider marrying young ideal ?

[–]RPW Mmargerym66 points67 points  (10 children) | Copy

For women marrying young is marrying in our prime. We have more time to have healthy children and we are giving our husbands the best of us. Wife goggles come into play eventually with the help of the memory of that 20-something girl you knew once upon a time.

Delaying marriage and children is not in a woman's favor. We age like milk, after all, as do our ovaries.

EDIT: it also is beneficial to grow with your husband, not grow and then think you just add him into your life. It really doesn't work that way, not most of the time, anyway.

[–][deleted] 28 points29 points  (9 children) | Copy

it also is beneficial to grow with your husband

Me and the wife met when we were twenty. We had some "off and on" times in the beginning but now we're 27, have a daughter, and things could hardly be better between us.

And we did indeed grow with eachother, as she got older and stopped taking birth control, she wasn't as attracted to my beta traits anymore, and was ready for me to be a man... I don't think she really knew this on a conscious level though, or maybe she just didn't want to tell me out of fear of hurting my feelings or something.... We just started to fight more and have sex less...

I can honestly thank TRP for helping me out in this department, probably saved my relationship.

[–]TRP VanguardCyralea6 points7 points  (8 children) | Copy

Can you expand on the birth control thing? My current girlfriend is on it, and she sometimes encourages beta behaviours -- which I have to suppress falling back on. What sort of changes did you see?

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (3 children) | Copy

When women are on birth control, it basically tricks their body into thinking they're pregnant, therefor they tend to be drawn to more "nice", "nurturing", and physically non-threatening men.... betas. They basically looking more for more feminine seeming men.

After they're off birth control, their bodies resume a natural hormonal state. There for, their sex drive increases, and their tastes in men goes from non-threatening betas, to more classically masculine men.

When my wife first met me, I was kinda emo and not in the most positive state of mind. I wasn't working out, I was kind of a push-over, I was sensitive, etc...

Fast forward like 5 years... She's not on birth control and we're starting to fight more and fuck less. I always thought of myself as kinda alpha, a desirable man, so I was confused when she implied that she didn't like me the way she used to... it hurt, but I had to make it work for the sake of my kid. TRP showed me how beta I was, and I made changes to be more masculine.

Me and her are FUCKING GREAT now. Every chance we get, we bang. SHe doesn't get her feelings hurt by me as much because I know how to frame everything I say in a non-angry, yet still firm and masculine way....

I did a lot of things to become a better man, but the bottom line is that, women are more a slave to their hormones than men, and birth control fucks with those hormones like nothing else.

If your GF goes off birth control, just step up your masculinity some how.

[–]BooksofMagic1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Me and her are FUCKING GREAT now. Every chance we get, we bang. SHe doesn't get her feelings hurt by me as much because I know how to frame everything I say in a non-angry, yet still firm and masculine way....

Can you give an example of the difference in how you say things?

Additionally, how long have you been taking TRP and how quickly did things start to change?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Instead of asking her to do things, I tell her to do things. Do it somewhat playfully, not mean or angrily. Also, a more nefarious thing to do is "instill dread" which means to basically plant the idea that you might be cheating, or you could cheat if you wanted to, this is just to remind her of your SMV. Do it in a playful, joking manner so you don't start a fight, it's about balance.

Additionally, how long have you been taking TRP and how quickly did things start to change?

I don't know, like 6 months? Things started to change almost instantly. I was able to descelate fights by giving her tingles and that's when I knew I was a believer.

Basically, instead of "getting into it" whenever she would start getting fussy, I would just take off my shirt and start doing push-ups while ignoring her. Almost always ends with fucking. My girl is real simple though, so I don't pretend like this is fool proof.

[–]boredinclass20 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Basically, instead of "getting into it" whenever she would start getting fussy, I would just take off my shirt and start doing push-ups while ignoring her. Almost always ends with fucking. My girl is real simple though, so I don't pretend like this is fool proof.

I laughed but this is fantastic advice. I love it!

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy

Also, how does she encourage beta behaviour? This might have nothing to do with birth control and it's just her being a woman...

Even though my RP changes caused our relationship to "click" and start working smoothly, my wife will never fully understand the dynamics of what's going on, her hamster won't let her. To her, love is still this magical thing that can't be defined, and it's in my best interest to keep it that way, otherwise she might become depressed or something. I most definitely love my wife, but when I say that, I mean that she helps me to produce oxytocin, dopemine, etc. all the chemicals which many people describe as that feeling of "love". My wife and most women could never be so cold and logical about what's happening.

For example, I was talking to my younger brother the other day, and he was was going through his first major break-up. This bitch had him move across the country for her, just to dump his ass a few months later.... Anyway, I was prying into what was going on and my advice to him was "shouldn't have shown her so much of your tortured, broken, emotional side. Chicks hate that." My wife heard me say that and she was all like "that's not true...", and I appreciate that she said it, but our relationship was proof that it was true. SHE was proof that it was true, but she'll remain oblivious.

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[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Not saying you should, just sayin'.

Yeah, I've tried, she understands a lot, but some of the more bitter truths are hard for her to admit because it might make her seem shallow or something. She want's me to be able to tell her everything. I do tell her everything, I just don't think my sob story and being a "sensitive artist" type makes me interesting anymore, thx to TRP. Now it's time to be a warrior poet, It's time to make and create things instead of describing how other things make me feel.... I can still express myself, just in a different way.

She wants to think that her love is unconditional, but it depends on me.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

You just restored some hope in humanity for me. Thank you.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

While I understand the rationale behind marrying young from a RP perspective, I worry about it in the sense that divorce rates are higher for younger couples usually because they get married before they're done developing as a person

[–]RPW Mmargerym8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

THis is true. The problem is we are a culture that coddles our young. We can prevent this from happening by both actually raising adults not just older children and reestablishing the social stigma of divorce (don't get married willy nilly!)

[–]StingrayVC11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'm not a mod, but a short time poster at RPW, so I hope you don't mind me answering this question. I have daughters and I wrote this and this a while back as my own advice and how I am trying to raise my girls.

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[–]Endorsed Contributorvandaalen1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I asked RPW the exact question.

Many many useful advices where given.

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (17 children) | Copy

In general, what are your opinions on the users here on /r/TheRedPill? Do many of their opinions or comments on women infuriate you? Or do you simply understand the resentment many contributors have?

[–][deleted] 51 points52 points  (2 children) | Copy

I have said this in various places at different times: TRP is a space for men. They are undergoing a very difficult process, and it's not my place to harass them at every junction. Some of the users here are young, other users are angry - so what? Over time, a lot of that anger will dissipate. There are men here that only want to use women for casual sex, and that's fine too. They may or may not change their mind as time goes on. I know many users here are in long-term relationships or married. I trust the more experienced members to guide and call "foul" when the newer members step too-far out of line. I trust that time and experience will lend a calmer brand of clarity. I also look at TRP as a safe-haven for men to talk to other men as men. The users here don't keep up social pretenses. Men talk differently to each other than they do to women. I don't see a problem with any of that.

[–]Gfresh4059 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

You are very wise.

[–]Endorsed ContributorDoxasticPoo6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'm torn...

On one hand I'm happy that your are not affected by my anger. Because I really don't want to hurt anyone with my emotional BS.

On the other hand.... what the hell is the point of anger if the target of your anger doesn't feel bad!

I guess that second point is reason enough to get rid of the anger, eh?

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[–]Endorsed ContributorDoxasticPoo2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

It's ok.

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[–]Endorsed ContributorDoxasticPoo1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

When I say, "It's ok." I don't mean to say it's ok for some women to do what they do. Because it's not. Abuse sucks (this is coming from someone currently suffering from C-PTSD after his last "relationship").

I just mean to say YOU shouldn't feel bad. 1) it is what it is, reality is important to RPers, 2) "feeling bad" creates an abuser/victim dynamic which is unhealthy for both men and women, 3) it could pendulum you into the other direction where men become the "abuser" and you feel like it's ok to be "victimized" because of what's happened to men.

Women are who they are. It's ok.

We men just need to figure out what in the hell we're going to do about it now.

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[–]Endorsed ContributorDoxasticPoo1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thank you. And I'll be fine in time.

The main reason I say, "It's ok." is that shaming women for shaming men... it's just a vicious cycle.

Building yourself up to the point where someone's shame doesn't affect you, that stops the cycle.

So yes, it's not ok for them to do what they do. But the answer isn't to go after them. The answer is to say, "It's ok." And build yourself up so they won't be able to affect you.

Also, the past is the past. Ain't nothing we can do about it now. Whatever responsibility you feel about your husband and children is not worth holding onto because you can't go back. You are only responsible for what you do now. And it sounds like now you're on the right track. :)

[–]RPW Mmargerym15 points16 points  (0 children) | Copy

I understand it and am sympathetic for the most part. Some of it stings but then you have to ask yourself why it stings and where they are coming from.

[–][deleted] 33 points34 points  (2 children) | Copy

i have endless sympathy for men in this disgusting feminized eunuch hellhole of a decadent mess of a culture. i cant believe more men arent angry. honestly, i cant believe there isnt a revolution

[–]1FloranHunter4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

honestly, i cant believe there isnt a revolution

That's a really good question. I think motherhood's the answer: mothers teach their boys to be betas while their fathers are sidelined or not even present. Since the indoctrination starts at birth, it's resilient to mere truth.

If men as a whole were raised RP, we probably would have a revolution. Hell, Muslims are already destablizing some European countries despite being a minority. Eventually the Islamic version of the RP will revolutionize parts of Europe.

[–]analrapeage-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

as a dude, i know the answer: guilt. men have been raised with the notion that they've oppressed women and now it's time to step aside and restrict aggressive behavior.

[–]PenguinLovr5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

For me its the latter. If it was the former, we would be /r/thebluepill

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[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

I sometimes want to comment here, but feel like I might be out of line if I did (this is a forum for men, my opinion here is not valid or relevant.)

I'm pretty sure no one has problems with RPW posting here.

However, here is the typical process of what happens when a non-RPW posts here:

  1. Non-RPW makes a thread telling us she has an "open mind" and is simply wondering what our viewpoint on a matter is.

  2. 100+ comments ensue trying to convince the woman that we're not all that bad, but respond to the woman explaining the flaws about her viewpoint.

  3. She responds by saying "well I'm not like that at all, so how do you explain that TRP?"

  4. Every man on here praises her for "not being like that"

That shit gets fuckin' old. Those are the most blue-pill threads we have. If she went on /r/RedPillWomen and tried that bullshit you guys would rip her apart, so I don't know why that doesn't happen on here.

[–]blazingblue162 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Old beta tendencies die hard.

[–]MSoftHarem23 points24 points  (15 children) | Copy

Given the reputation of /r/TheRedPill to the majority of Reddit, and the manosphere's reputation with the Internet in general, why do you think both communities are experiencing such a surge in growth?

When we started TRP a little over a year ago we would have never expected it to have this many subscribers, or even so much demand we had to create a community for RP women.

[–]RPW Mmargerym31 points32 points  (4 children) | Copy

Note that more "traditional" ways of viewing men, women, and relationships are seeing a resurgence at the same time. I think people are realizing the promises of modern mainstream feminism aren't actually a thing and are, in a very real sense, "going back" to what worked before. I think Red Pill in particular is popular because it doesn't candy coat the truth which makes it more available.

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[–]MSoftHarem5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

Seems like with the popularity of "50 Shades of Grey" and "Game of Thrones" that women seem quite attracted to RP theory. Perhaps as these ideas spread we'll see a more mainstream resurgence in raw masculinity, and the accompanying femininity to balance it.

[–]RPW Mmargerym7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yes. I watch teeny bopper shows on the CW while doing housework/running (your judgment here) and the same is true, there. Sure, there are still the whiney Beta guys but they fall all over themselves for the masculine men. I was just thinking about this very thing this morning.

[–]StingrayVC15 points16 points  (2 children) | Copy

It's the truth. A lot of people have been seeing things happen around them with no explanation whatsoever. Then they come here, often through those who intentionally deride, and think DING DING DING! And stay to learn more.

For those who are immediately turned off and click away, a seed has been planted. A seed that, if they allow themselves to look around, can grow into bigger doubt about popular culture. Then they come back to learn more.

The truth can only be buried for so long before it comes to the surface again.

[–]MSoftHarem8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

Even mutant hamsters on steroids eventually run out of energy, or, we hope.

[–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (2 children) | Copy

"There's no such thing as bad publicity." The more other people complain about how backwards TRP and RPW subs are, the more curious people will become. Many subscribers find their way to these subs because other users were throwing hissy-fits. When they actually take the time to look around and read, they are surprised because the material is actually applicable to them and makes sense. They start to wonder and question. That's all you need.

Granted, some of those new subscriber numbers are bound to be newly converted trolls, but that doesn't really matter in my opinion. They are still increasing the size of the sub(s) and helping to make them more popular. It's annoying, but trolls are good for business.

[–]MSoftHarem17 points18 points  (0 children) | Copy

I've maintained that the feminists are the best PR department we never hired. They're rabid, read more of our threads than we do, and never shut the fuck up! Thanks "ladies"

[–]dr_bloodmoney5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

"There's no such thing as bad publicity."

Doesn't matter what they are long as they are saying it.

[–]notseriouslyserious2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think quite a number of guys instinctively knew that something about the status quo was fishy, but couldnt quite put our finger on it. Anybody with an ounce of reasoning skills should be able to see why after visiting this sub. Of course most dont know this sub exists, but that's where the sub bashing on /r/askreddit comes in for the advertisement.

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[–]MSoftHarem3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

It clearly does, but I just wanted to hear different perspectives on what we already know.

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[–]StingrayVC22 points23 points  (0 children) | Copy

If you maintain frame and don't make a deal out of it, it's not as crippling as a lot of men think. A short alpha man is still alpha. Might she think about it from time to time? She might, but she will hamster those thoughts away because she wants to be with you. It's the alpha she wants, not the height.

On a side note, my husband is one inch taller than I am. I love to wear very high heels. I asked him once if this bothered him and he laughingly said, "Not at all. I'll just tell people I'm with the big broad over there." He couldn't care less and this just makes his frame all the more dreamy. ;)

[–]morganlane19 points20 points  (1 child) | Copy

Not a mod, but an RPW engaged to a 5'6" man. My advice is simple: don't let your height be the thing that speaks for you. Be interesting, be confident, take care of your body (aka, be fit), and exude mastery and control over yourself and your life.

When I met my fiance, I barely noticed his height. I was too busy swooning over his obvious intelligence, his engaging and confident personality, and his ridiculous muscles. A short man's height will always work against him, it's just the way it is. But he can control the degree of impact it has. Get ripped, handle your shit, and forget about your height. If you're self-assured enough not to worry about it, most women won't either.

[–]JJTheJetPlane56570 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

The benefit of being on the shorter side is that your physical fitness starts to show sooner and more easily. Go to /r/fitness for five minutes and you'll probably find a post about a taller guy lamenting at the rate his physique is developing.

(Note not that I'm blaming them or placing judgement on them, I imagine it must be incredibly frustrating to be giving things your all and not getting the results as other people)

[–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (0 children) | Copy

my husband is not tall, hes about an inch taller than me. he has a VERY dominant, bantam cock-of-the-walk frame, a devastating "jerk-smirk" and an insane sense of humor that keeps me laughing all day. he always seems bigger than life to me.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

I never really focused on height, because I was always on the tall side of my peer group. For me, it never really mattered one way or the other. That said, once I did date a gentleman taller than me, I realized how nice it was.

Don't be insecure about your height, and don't comment on how tall she is - all that does is shine a big bright light on the issue and it's not as though you'd be telling her anything new. :0)

If you're relaxed and comfortable about the situation, she's more likely to follow suit and ease up. That said, if you come across as antagonistic or like you have a chip on your shoulder - you're more likely to drive her off.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

I never saw it as a problem since I have a cousin who is a natural alpha at the height of 5'4 and he has all kinds of women tripping over themselves to get to him so it's not a crutch if you got everything else on point

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

Not a mod, fellow red pill woman here. :)

I am 5'10" and my man is 5'5". Do not fret, many girls love short men! My SO also has absolutely no problems with me wearing heels, even if they place me at 6'0"-6'2".

[–]Endorsed ContributorDoxasticPoo2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah, this is the inverse phenomenon.

I'm 5'5". I've learned to go after girls under 5'3" and over 5'9".

For whatever reason the shorty's and tally's love me. The ones around average and slightly above tend to be a harder sell.

[–]TempestTcup4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

I would tell each and every one to read Dannyfrom504!

[–]PenguinLovr4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'm not a mod, but I'm 5'0 and dating a very short man. When people complain about being short, you gotta recognize you're still way taller than short women!

[–]menina_realista2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Not a mod but I have a lot of personal experience with this. Basically, I would put extra emphasis on building muscle and practice showing confidence and power with your gait (observe how military guys carry themselves.) Almost every guy I've dated has been 5'6-5'7 (I'm 5'5) and they were hot because they had a commanding presence and exuded signs of masculinity with traits like body and facial hair, big muscles, not taking shit from people, making me laugh, etc.

Height is nice, but it's just one facet of your overall attractiveness; playing up your other assets or dating smaller girls can compensate for it. A lot of women end up taller than their men when they wear heels, anyway.

[–]JJTheJetPlane56570 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

From a little bit of a different perspective if you're interested, I'm a lesbian and I'm 5'1 but I'm "the alpha" in my relationship (my girlfriend is 5'8).

The dynamics aren't exactly the same because lesbian relationships straddle this weird relationship line where some dynamics are more similar/the same as heterosexual ones, and some are inherently different because two women. But there you go.

Also I'm not particularly butch or anything, you probably wouldn't point and say "lesbian" if you saw me on the street.

[–]Endorsed ContributorOccamsUsername12 points13 points  (3 children) | Copy

If you were to introduce your daughters to the commonly talked on features of female nature discussed on TRP (hypergamy for example), would you attempt to be explicit and clinical in discussing these natures with them, or try to educate less directly?

[–]RPW Mmargerym10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

When they are younger, the latter. When they are older and hopefully already have that "sugarcoated" foundation then the former.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (2 children) | Copy

In this day and age, it's going to be a lot rarer for women in relationships / marriage to stay at home and not work. Because women have comparably good prospects coming out of college, and exceptionally good prospects if they go into tech, do you think the advice of "find a good man, marry young, be his dream housewife" still applies?

With an economic downturn, way less guys interested in supporting a household themselves, etc, do you think the optimal strategy for women is to keep one foot in their career and one foot in their relationship, so to speak? I know that typically this advice is considered bad - "You can't be a great wife, make dinner, clean, and work full time!" and women who do this are accused of wanting it all, despite the confines of reality.

But if you are looking to lock down a high value guy, then perhaps the independence / non-gold digger status that you display by having your own solid career makes up for the fact that you can't spend as much time being his perfect feminine housewife?

[–]TempestTcup6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

There are plenty of soft careers that pay good money and are very flexible like bookkeeping for a company, dental assistant, etc. They don't require a lot of education but are in demand.

When I was a kid in the 60s my mom and all her friends worked until first kid, either worked, worked part time, or stayed home with the kids until the youngest was in school, and then went back to work. The 50s housewife wasn't the overwhelming majority at all.

[–]RPW Mmargerym5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

This really depends on what you are looking for. I stay home and we are far from "well off". It's not as hard as people like to think it is. But, again, it depends on what you are looking for, how you would like to live your life.

But I am not in the majority on RPW. You can, in fact, work and still be a good RPW. There is nothing wrong there. But husband and home must come FIRST, always. Even housewives need to get that because there is plenty they can put first that isn't those two things.

[–][deleted] 55 points56 points  (19 children) | Copy

Other mod here. i wasnt sure id be around but if anyone has any questions for me here i am.

i little about me. i wrote my first antifeminist letter to the editor (that's what we had before the internet)in 1987 when i was 17 in my first year of college and discovered there was an insane "date rape" hysteria going on. later in my anti feminist career i made the woman who wrote "i never called it rape" cry on talk radio. i was a prolific commentor at heartiste (then roissy) back before the man-o-sphere got started and "the red pill" was called "game". i had a short lived man-o-sphere/HBD oriented blog that was included in's link round ups and hawaiian libertarian's sidebar. i met the cave man of my dreams in 2003 and he's been dragging me around by my hair ever since. and yes, i really am a woman

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[–][deleted] 25 points26 points  (11 children) | Copy

it wasnt sudden enlightment, i was never ever a feminist at all, college served to make me virulently anti-feminist, but i have always been of the right, and hated leftism, marxism and any form of collectivism. you have to remember that feminism as it is now was really just coming into vogue then and hadnt taken over yet. my parents introduced me to a ev. psych/biological worldview at a very early age and i just always agreed with it, i think i was like 13(?) when my mom gave me desmond morris's "the naked ape" to read, i wa salways obsessed with historical fiction and the ancient world, feminism just didt figure anywhere around me that i could tell. my mom had a "job" but not a career. my parents stayed together and have been married for 45 years, in fact, there is no divorce in my family at all. you guys dont really know it, but things were a LOT different in the 70s and 80s than you can imagine

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[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

the red queen by matt ridley, the selfish gene by dawkins, the moral animal by richard wright, demonic males, the chapters on sex in the blank slate by steven pinker, steven pinker and elizabeth spelkes debate on sex differences at, i cant think of any more off the top of my head heres a free pdf of the naked ape for fun, take what you can or doesnt seem dated, discardf the rest--it and the human chapter in EO wilsons "sociobiology" kinda started it all

[–]jjshinobi0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy


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[–]alcockell0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

God - was it the 80s when BBC2 aired the docco series that accompanied the book?

WOuld go out on BBC4 nowadays..

[–]1Zackcid11 points12 points  (3 children) | Copy

Off-topic, but it seems you have a strong aversion to using capital "i" in your comments.

why such hatred?

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy

i loathe capital letters with the white hot intensity of a thousand suns!!! away with them!!

[–]Retsaot353 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

And yet you're willing to reach for the shift key for all those exclamation points...

[–][deleted] -3 points-2 points  (0 children) | Copy

im an enigma wrapped in a mystery

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[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Cross cultural miscommunication between classes and races as the universities became more and more economically and ethnicly diverse

[–]marlybarrow9 points10 points  (6 children) | Copy

TRP subreddit has a lot of unsavoury things to say about women.

women only love you so long as you provide some sort of value.

a womans emotions will dictate to her what is reality and what is important

you cannot be vulnerable (breakdown emotionally/express doubts about yourself) around your wife or gf, otherwise you will turn her off and she will look elsewhere for her fix of alpha

There are many other examples on the TRP that is accepted as fact. Do you think they are correct?

[–]RPW Mmargerym10 points11 points  (1 child) | Copy

Yes. I also don't view them as "unsavory". All that seems pretty benign to me.

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (2 children) | Copy

i believe the portrayal of women in TRP is pretty much correct in almost every aspect. i have a few quibbles

[–]1FloranHunter2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Can you elaborate?

[–]RebootedMale1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Men and women both need to offer value to each other. The female's value is based on fertility and beauty and the man's value is derived from status and accomplishment. This is actually symmetrical yet different.

[–]1mrust20 points21 points  (29 children) | Copy

I just read through the FAQ you put up yesterday on RPW and one of the things you don't mention or talk about is The Blue Pill. I'm not talking about the subreddit, but the actual metaphor of denying reality to live plugged-in and blissfully unaware.

Since men's blue pill is to live conditioned in a world dictated by the feminine imperative, what do you see as the blue pill counterpart to RPW?

[–]TempestTcup110 points111 points  (8 children) | Copy

what do you see as the blue pill counterpart to RPW?

Being a plate or riding the cock-carousel while getting your Masters in Women's Studies, gaining 30 pounds, buying those sassy thick-framed glasses and cutting your hair.

[–]1blahbergstein5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy

What do you recommend to women who realize this all too late?

[–]TempestTcup3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

I am assuming that you mean to find a good man, so along those lines:

It's really never too late. There will always be men around for every SMV. If an elderslut reforms, acknowledges her faults, and vows to go straight and narrow, she should be able to find a good man. She needs to be honest with herself and the man, and she needs to be extremely grateful for his love and leadership. Gratitude is essential because without it she will likely get booooorrred and revert to her old ways.

[–][deleted] 26 points27 points  (0 children) | Copy

You deserve the highest of high fives.

[–]Pill_Red2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Many men are blue-pillers because that is the 'default setting' that society puts them in. Do you think that the 'blue-pill woman' is the default setting for women in our society?

[–]TempestTcup4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Do you think that the 'blue-pill woman' is the default setting for women in our society?

Yes, absolutely. Women are not only encouraged to be blue pill, but are actively shamed for being any other way. If you aren't a strong independent woman in charge of your sexuality (by repeatedly giving blowjobs in bar bathrooms) then you are a throwback and a doormat to today's society.

[–]VinylGuy4201 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I'm a sucker for women with short or shoulder length hair. I just think its attractive. Is that shunned for a RPW as not embracing femininity, or does it matter as long as that's their style or what not? Serious question.

[–]TempestTcup3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

It all depends on their man. The reason that we say for women to grow their hair long is that it appeals to the largest portion of the male population, but if a woman's man likes it short, by all means cut it off! She needs to do the things that are attractive specifically to him.

[–]RPW Mmargerym41 points42 points  (8 children) | Copy

To me it's the feminist dream- women are just like men, we don't need men, our worth is measured by our degrees and careers, and if any man doesn't want us he's just weak and bad and stupid. AKA grrrrrrrl power.

Finding out women are actually the weaker sex, that we are different, that our biology won't be happy with pretending to be men, etc is a huge part of taking the Red Pill in this modern world.

[–]salty-lemons8 points9 points  (6 children) | Copy

When you say that women are the weaker sex, do you mean women are weaker physically or on mental/intellectual/emotional levels as well?

[–]RPW Mmargerym17 points18 points  (5 children) | Copy

Definitely physically and emotionally. The latter tends to get in the way of the mental and the intellectual.

[–]salty-lemons4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

Women are obviously the weaker sex physically, no question. Emotional intelligence- the ability to identify, assess, and control the emotions of oneself, and the ability to identify and respond to the emotions of others. Intellectual intelligence- the ability to learn and apply knowledge.

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[–]rapreaper6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

I've noticed that the female scientists, engineers, managers and lawyers etc. Are much better at controlling their emotions during working hours than those who didn't get into a field requiring a high level of intellect.

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (1 child) | Copy

I am not a red pill woman but YES! There are smart women but only smart for women. Women need to realize the feminism lied to them, they are not men's equal.

[–]The_Determinator1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Rather, we're counterparts.

[–]JJTheJetPlane56571 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

To me it's the feminist dream- women are just like men, we don't need men

And what about lesbians?

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[–]Lady_Motido 4 points4 points [recovered] | Copy

Are these men married or single? I think you'll find that most married men are not any happier unless the wife also swallows the redpill.

[–]TRP Vanguard: "Dark Triad Expert"IllimitableMan22 points23 points  (5 children) | Copy

Despite the nobility of the commitment you ladies work and strive for, it's going to take a legislative change to get the majority of redpillers to put a ring on it. Some will take the plunge and I will not be the first or last to brand them naive idiots, red pill lady or not. If I'm making a legal contract with someone whose primary mode of thought is emotional, I want to have the more favourable terms in the contract, not them. Marriage contract is what is known in legal terms from the perspective of the male as SUFFICIENT but not ADEQUATE. Meaning there is sufficient grounds for a contract when reviewing marriage papers, but the contract is not adequate (meaning FAIR in the exchange of promissory legal value) he is required to give you more value as per divorce law and family law than you are required to legally reciprocate to him.

I'm in law, and contract law is red pill as fuck - that's inherently what marriage is, a form of contract law linked to divorce law and if children are involved, family law. In fact, marriage is the only contract now one can terminate at any time without fulfilling the conditions of the contract (your matrimonial oath) as "till death do us part" would imply as a legally binding verbal contract that should you initiate divorce as the violator of the contractual terms (without a legal exemption) that you would be liable for damages and he would be awarded a remedy, however where the blur comes in contract law is that once you become close associates/family the court automatically assumes anything you say as a promise in passing verbally is not intended to be a legally binding contract, however the marriage ceremony is official and thus if the law was actually non-feminist and logical, it would hold true that you should be bound by your oath with all your friends and family bearing witness to the signing of a marriage contract.

Feminist family law is fucking up everything, it's unfair to demand marriage as a man has no recourse and gives up a lot of power (what you're attracted to) in the process because "you know you have him now." Marriage provides him with no additional benefits to cohabiting with you and the children, in fact it primarily exists to give you (the woman) peace of mind and an economic avenue to screw him for money "every penny" if a divorce should ever occur, that's basically what it is, a redundancy back-up plan for a woman to fall back on in the result of relationship failure. Yes lifelong marriages can work, but they're outliers in todays culture, or remnants from a less feminist era. The benefits of divorce for a woman can serve as an incentive for you to give up if the going ever gets really tough and he's not as alpha as he once was, it's a huge tactical fallibility in any man's reign in a relationship with his woman.

That's not your fault as RP ladies, that's the fault of feminism and the state, but that's how it is as it stands and thus you unfortunately don't become magically exempt from that due to your hard work and traditionalist values.

If traditional laws were adopted in regards to marriage where the woman is most likely destitute if she decides to leave and not work on things as well as require her to need good reason to leave if she so chooses (abolish no-fault divorce, require evidence of abuse and other such things like they used to) then it may become a viable option again, otherwise you're essentially asking a guy to sign his nuts over in a legal contract simply because your SMV beyond aesthetics is high.

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[–]notseriouslyserious3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

I think you mean a prenup.

Unfortunately a prenup signed as a requirement for marriage can be voided in court because of duress.

The only way a prenup would hold is if the woman suggest it, and i just dont see that ever happening for the majority of women.

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[–]notseriouslyserious0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It not realistic because feminists would scream oppression or patriarchy.

It also far too drastic a change and people likely wont support it. Change need to occur slowly. Divorce and alimony reform is a good starting point, and you can see how much resistance there are against it. Some women are screaming bloody murder when NJ was trying to change their lifetime alimony rules that would stop lifetime alimony payments when the guy retires.

[–]suscitare-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Why was I never consulted about these egregious changes to the law? This makes me so angry.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

I don't need my wife to "swallow the pill". I just need to be credible as a man and then she will let me take control. However you are right, it's depressing for men until that happens. It doesn't happen overnight.

[–]TempestTcup0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It's funny because it works the opposite way too; if she steps aside and relinquishes control, the man almost always steps up to lead.

This process also takes a long time and the woman cannot question her husband's decision or she will derail the entire process.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

same blue pill for us. its the same worldview, we just seek to use red pill knowledge to make ourselves into something good men want to commit to.

[–]Hokuten856 points7 points  (21 children) | Copy

Are there any ideologies that are coming out of this sub that you guys disagree with? What are they and is there any evidence that provides weight to your disagreement?

[–]RPW Mmargerym14 points15 points  (13 children) | Copy

I think marriage can still be worth something. But I'm a woman and don't have the threat of having my balls cooked over hot coals, so... But in general I think marriage is still worth something. As for evidence, I got nothing that isn't purely anecdotal.

[–]TRP VanguardYouDislikeMyOpinion2 points3 points  (12 children) | Copy

Why not just have marriage without the marriage contract? In other words, simply have a life-long marital relationship under your own terms without involving the state. Have a wedding, wear wedding rings, and legally set everything up the way you want to, without actually getting legally married.

[–]RPW Mmargerym6 points7 points  (6 children) | Copy

I'm sure that would work for a lot of people and more power to them. But I think there is something to be said for a contract. It definitely means something more to put it all on the line vs just having a show of it.

[–]TRP VanguardYouDislikeMyOpinion1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

You can put it all on the line using regular legal means without getting the state involved. Custom contract.

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[–]andromede82 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think it's just a matter of tradition... here in Quebec most young couple do not marry anymore (1 out of...20?). But I know a lot of them who are in a LTR (5 years +) with kids and everything. Neither man or women express the desire to marry as much as americans do I think.

[–]1sailorJery-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

think about it in terms of having children, marriage is necessary to legally define your rights with your children, especially in cases where something happens to the SO.

[–]1independentmale0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It definitely means something more to put it all on the line vs just having a show of it.

The problem is the man is the one "putting it all on the line" in most cases. I'm no millionaire, but I do well for myself and have a great income and some solid assets. Why should I put all of that on the line in hopes that she won't leave me? Where's the incentive for me? I'm the one who will lose in a divorce by being forced to transfer a substantial portion of my assets and future income to her, and she can initiate this any time, for any reason or for no reason at all.

There's absolutely nothing in it for me. A whole lot of risk with no protections and no rewards.

[–]enticingasthatmaybe0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

But I think there is something to be said for a contract.

It's only a contract for men. Of course you're going to use the tag line "There's something to be said for...". Yes, there is something to be said for a man giving you everything he offers without legally enforced reciprocity on your part. If I could get that deal I'd be trying to add artificial sentiment to it too.

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[–]andromede81 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

ho GOD. It almost happen in Quebec too.... (but people speak against it).

[–]1independentmale0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Unfortunately, if you act like a married couple and hold yourself out to be married, in a great many jurisdictions the state will legally consider you to be married.

[–]haiimaperson0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Would this potentially cause issues with taxes, power of attorney if one of you is severely injured or sick, etc?

Also, if a woman wants to take her husband's last name without going through the modern avenues of marriage, can she still do so? I know I was required to provide a marriage certificate when I took my husband's name, and from what I have heard, name changes without a "legitimate" reason are pretty hard to obtain.

[–]TRP VanguardYouDislikeMyOpinion0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy


Layers can do most of it.

You will lose some money tax wise as well.

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[–]TempestTcup3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

It could lead to a large number of partners if she chooses unwisely or if she doesn't provide value to the relationship. As long a woman is honest and shows the man that she is attracted but vetting him, he should understand if he's a good man and she's not a reformed slut. If he doesn't understand, then she just dodged a bullet.

[–]enticingasthatmaybe1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

As long a woman is honest and shows the man that she is attracted but vetting him, he should understand if he's a good man and she's not a reformed slut.

This is key! I'll wait (for a while) if she's making her intentions known overtly... Not with indecipherable hinting she sees as "obvious".

[–]TempestTcup3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Oh lol, women are terrible about hinting cryptically. They also think that a smile and a nudge is initiation!

[–]TempestTcup9 points10 points  (2 children) | Copy

Do you mean TRP? Not really. RPW subscribes to the same basic ideology but whereas TRP is all about having sex without a lot of commitment, RPW is all about keeping our numbers low while looking for a good man to marry. We try to get commitment before having a lot of sex with the one man.

[–]Hokuten853 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

Yes, TRP vs RPW. Was curious if there were any big differences. Frequently I'll run across instances where women are essentially considered a small step above a monkey in intellectual capacity and it's not worth the time to educate on trp principles. Just fuck it and move on...

While we are all strongly influenced by biology, women still have a brain and can use it.

[–]TempestTcup6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

TRP has a lot of men who are just now finding the red pill and some of them are rightfully angry about the lies they have been told their entire life. They blame women for a lot of it because it was usually women who told them to "be nice, be yourself". The best thing to do when you see stuff like that is to remember that they are going through a sort of grieving process for their blue pill self, so right after denial is anger before they move on to bargaining and acceptance.

Sometimes you have to take what you need from the process and leave what will only hurt you in the long run.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (12 children) | Copy

For Tempest: What's it like feeding your husband the red pill? How did that affect the dynamic being that it's "supposed" to be the other way around.

[–]TempestTcup13 points14 points  (11 children) | Copy

At first I didn't tell him about the RP. I was so horrified and scared about the fact that I had been fitness-testing him pretty hard; I immediately quit fitness testing and started to try to cater to him instead.

The way I introduced it was by leaving the computer on and open to a RP site. Captain Capitalism was pretty tame, so that was the first, followed by Apocalypse Cometh. He liked those and found the rest by himself.

I also quit making decisions that didn't involve my work, what I was cooking for dinner, or other household things. He was then making all decisions and didn't like it one bit at first, but has warmed up to it since then. It has really worked well for us!

[–][deleted] 7 points7 points | Copy

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[–]TempestTcup13 points14 points  (1 child) | Copy

I immediately quit showing any sort of negativity and replaced it with enthusiasm. I quit making decisions knowing fully well that I could NOT question or object to his decisions. I can only change me; I can't change my husband except by allowing him to find his way on his own.

By stepping aside and getting out of his way I created a vacuum and he stepped up to fill it. Your husband doesn't need to take the pill necessarily, but you can up his alpha by allowing him to be your Captain.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (7 children) | Copy

I'm a little confused about your answer. Isn't fitness testing supposed to be normal behavior? If you quit fitness testing aren't you going against your nature?

[–][deleted] 22 points23 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah, but it's her husband... That behavior is for single women trying weed out the chumps. What she did was what a good wife would do, stop playing games and simply show him RP material so he can evolve into the man she wants without him being confused by her shit tests.

[–]dropit_sphere14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy

The nature of most men is to sit at home and masturbate all day.

Surely we can all do better than our nature.

[–]TempestTcup5 points6 points  (3 children) | Copy

I had been fitness testing a lot, and decided to not do it at all for a while. If a woman's nature is to be a bitch, snipe at her husband, and be a shrew, perhaps going against her nature is EXACTLY what she should do

[–][deleted] 3 points3 points | Copy

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[–]TempestTcup4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

We aren't really into that sort of thing we are both introverts - INTJ, so we are pretty quiet and like our life smooth :)

[–]1FloranHunter2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Ah, you want your fitness tests to be a catalyst for him to hit a positive feedback cycle of frame enhancement so eventually he can deal with any of your fitness tests, even far above your previous level.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

That is a great question. Thanks for asking.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (6 children) | Copy

Have there been any honest negatives for anyone of you when making your relationships more redpill?

[–]RPW Mmargerym19 points20 points  (4 children) | Copy

The negatives generally lead to positives. For example: it's hard for me to hold my tongue, I don't want to get off my butt and exercise or clean the house, etc. But sucking it up and dealing has led to some really great things. It's harder being in a Red Pill relationship and it's also more rewarding.

EDIT: and hopefully that came close to answering your question.

[–]TooMuchToDoo8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

Completely agree. The same also goes for men; getting off the couch to go lift at the gym, or to work on ourselves to become people of high value.

Definitely not the easy road, but the best road no doubt.

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[–]andromede82 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

My relationship have always been redpillish (ish because not 100% perfect) WAY before I learned about redpill. It's as much hard for me than it is for my boyfriend because we actually work for our relation to... you know... work. But it's natural for us so nothing is really hard as it may be for someone who tried to change what they always done. Long term awards are better.

[–][deleted] 16 points17 points  (0 children) | Copy

I haven't experienced anything negative, and I'm actually much happier because of the Captain/First Mate dynamic. In the past, I have tried the whole "equality" based relationship model, and it was a headache. I was the main driving force for everything, and it really took a toll after a while.

My SO takes the lead, and I provide feedback. We're always on the same page and there's never any confusion or bickering.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (5 children) | Copy

Do you have sex more now than before you went red pill??

[–]RPW Mmargerym16 points17 points  (0 children) | Copy

No but we've always been like rabbits. However the quality is something else entirely. Way better.

[–]TempestTcup11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yes, and I now have a nice collection of Victoria's Secret Mini-Cheekies!

[–]PenguinLovr9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy


edit: I always liked sex, but I do more things that make my guy want to do it more :)

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy


Unless something is severely wrong, every RP couple will (or at least should) be answering this question with a resounding "YES"

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (5 children) | Copy

I'm a man and I love the blog Girls being Girls...

[–]RPW Mmargerym4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

You aren't the only one!

[–]StingrayVC3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy

Thank you!!

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

Can I.. Can I marry one of your blog moderators? lol jk

[–]RPW Mmargerym5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

We're all married! But maybe we'll attract some young singles in the comments.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Silly moderator. Being married to your blog isn't a thing.

lol. And thanks for answering.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (34 children) | Copy

Here at TRP, we get a lot of flak for expressing what I think are common sense ideas, yet, I see very little attention sent your way to RPW. Is that really the case? Or am I oblivious to the goings on?

[–]RPW Mmargerym30 points31 points  (14 children) | Copy

Oh no, we get tons of crap. Maybe not as much as you do but we have our fair share of trolls, even of the "concerned" variety. They like to send us numbers to abuse hotlines.

[–]MSoftHarem17 points18 points  (8 children) | Copy

Still my favorite RPW post.

[–]TRP VanguardHumanSockPuppet6 points7 points  (7 children) | Copy

Who what now?

[–]MSoftHarem9 points10 points  (6 children) | Copy

There was a post a little while back, from TBP, that listed the RAINN hotline number along with a nice little propaganda speech about how RPW were all abused and needed to "get out." It was hilarious.

[–]still_very_alive11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

Saw that thread. Ahaha holy fuck did I love it. Typical, really - Men listen to RP, they're disgusting misogynistic neckbeards who can't get laid. Women listen to RP, they're poor abused girls who don't know better.

[–]TRP VanguardHumanSockPuppet3 points4 points  (4 children) | Copy

I'd love to read it. Gonna see if I can find it and then post a link.

[–]MSoftHarem7 points8 points  (3 children) | Copy

It was deleted within seconds-minutes, but

"What your husbands/fiancés/boyfriends are doing is abuse. But there is hope.

Safe Haven: 1-877-701-7233

National Domestic Violence Hotline[1] :1-800-787-3224

National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-HOPE (4673)

RAINN Online Hotline.[2]

National Resource Center for Child Protective Services: 704-845-2121

Whatever he is telling you, you don't deserve to be treated like this."

[–]TRP VanguardHumanSockPuppet9 points10 points  (2 children) | Copy


Disregard the comfort, and fulfillment, and satisfaction you feel in living a life of your own choosing. You don't deserve to be treated like that.

Instead, live your life for a faceless, demanding movement of loosely-associated self-serving opportunists.

[–]RPW Mmargerym6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

Oh, you speak feminist!

[–]EnforcerBudu23550 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Only because... they're a SPY! Doesn't TRP have some kind of KGB/flamethrower to stop this kind of thing?


[–]dropit_sphere16 points17 points  (4 children) | Copy

They like to send us numbers to abuse hotlines.

hahahahahhaa I'm sorry I love this.

[–]RPW Mmargerym3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy

as in seriouslyjustdropit?

[–]dropit_sphere3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy


[–]RPW Mmargerym3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

Close enough. Hi! :)

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (15 children) | Copy

On the RPW sub, we have our share of trolls and critics, but TRP definitely gets a lot more heat. I think this is partly to do with the fact that the RPW sub is a lot smaller than TRP, but also because our focus is much more narrow. Our focus is on obtaining (or maintaining) long-term relationships, and being good women. By and large, our sub doesn't have as much "shock value" as TRP sub does.

Thanks for the question!


[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (14 children) | Copy

One of the big pieces of advice for RPW is marrying young, which is difficult due to the fact many young RP men don't want a LTR. They just want sex, and to keep a soft harem. How does a young RPW compete in a world like that, and convince a RP man to settle down?

[–] points points | Copy

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[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I like the answer. Thank you kindly.

[–]TRP VanguardCyralea6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy

Not a woman, but the obvious answer is to marry a slighter older RP man who's seeking commitment. You'll have the added benefit that he likely has access to more resources and clout. Your youth will appeal to him, so you have a natural advantage.

An RP man who's not looking to get married simply won't.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Dammit, I'm not a female (second this has happened in this thread). I'm asking for the sole sake of understanding TRP pill better.

But I appreciate the response and logic, which makes sense.

[–]1FloranHunter2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Heh. It never occurred to me that RP women would aim for men their own age.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (4 children) | Copy

I have no desire to get married, so I'm not especially helpful there. What I do know is that patience is key, and you have to stick to your guns. Don't compromise your RPW beliefs in the hopes that slutting it up will snag you a committed RP man. Women can also keep an eye out for slightly older men as well (2-5 years or so). Also, there are plenty of good young men that actually want a relationship - you just have to keep your eyes open.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

that slutting it up will snag you a committed RP man. Women can also keep an eye out for slightly older men as well (2-5 years or so). Also, there are plenty of good young men that actually want a relationship - you just have to keep your eyes open.

Sorry, I should have clarified, I'm a male. I'm asking for curiosity's sake.

As for the young men looking for relationships, the VAST majority of those guys are betas. Landing a Red Piller doesn't sound like an easy task.

And holy shit, the light bulb just clicked- it's not supposed to be an easy task for a woman because men have the upper hand in relationships!

[–]RebootedMale1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Slightly older is out the window. Subtract 7 and multiply by two. A 22 year old shouldn't shoot down a 30 year old based on age and historically 35 could be a solid match.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Sure, the age gap can always be expanded to include more men. 2-5 years older was simply the range that I always used and it worked well for me.

[–]CThaxter0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Realistically, how many 22 year old women would date 35 year old men? Not trying to be disrepectful, but at that age, all of my friends dated men their own age. There was always one or two women who would date older guys, but the vast majority of young women in my circle preferred dating men their own age (and their parents, too, preferred that their daughters avoid significantly older men). Has that dynamic now changed, or do you see it changing in the future?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Why should we have to find someone our own age? Historically it doesnt make sense for a young high quality girl to marry an equally young man. The idea is find a man right after he finishes "sowing his oats" and wants to settle down. For my, my boyfriend is 8 years older than me and im probably going to marry him in the next few years. I know this sub hates marriage and LTR, but sometimes people want families. Anyway, we are a perfect match. I have met absolutely 0 men in my age range that are both RP-ish AND ready to want something a bit more meaningful in life than just a new pussy every night.

I saw a write up in this sub actually, and it said men looking for high quality girls should always try to find someone younger than them because frame is easier and all the quality girls in your age range are going to already be taken by men who are older than you.

But yes, its very hard. You dont work to "convince" the RP guy. He has to be looking. I would never go hang out at a club or go home with guys so most RP guys in the game mindset would never have found me anyway. The idea for us is to just be good choices if a man looking to settle down comes along. Be faithful, dont fuck around, and work on improving yourself. Then, when you meet a guy and start dating, he will WANT to stick around. If I can make the man happy enough and make him feel like a king, no way will he just "pass."

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

... Thanks for the insight, but I'M A FUCKING MAN. (Third time this has happened to me in this thread.) I'm only asking to understand The Red Pill and RPW in general, so thanks for the input.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

Hahahahaha sorry. Actually I think I sorta knew you were a guy but I got lost halfway through and started using the wrong pronouns I guess. Not used to telling guys how to attract guys.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I believe it. I'm a naturally a curiousperson, and while new to TRP, I want to learn everything about from all angles. Appreciate the point of view.

Edit: Forgot a word

[–]TempestTcup2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Do you mean good attention or bad (troll) attention?

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

I was referring to troll attention specifically.

[–]TempestTcup3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

We delete any troll remarks and troll posts that we get, right after we ban them.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (4 children) | Copy

If someone is looking for red pill women where would they find them?

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

Well, I know that I never attended large parties, hung out in bars, or went to clubs. Bookstores, hiking groups, photography/art classes. You're going to get a mixed bag wherever you go, just be on the look-out for positive traits.

[–]RPW Mmargerym4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Mostly at church is the truth of it. But I think what you are going to have to look for is RPW in the making. None of us are born RPW these days what with being dropped directly into feminism. Look for women that are open to it. You can tell with how they treat men and how they care for themselves. They are everywhere there is just so few of them...

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Young (18-24) and not at parties. They will be in the gardening club or cooking classes or even not going out at all because honestly, its hard to find friends who arent poisoned. I know a lot of women on the sub feel very lonely because they cant relate to other girls in their social circles, and cant "be a bro" because that is counter-intuitive.

[–]PenguinLovr0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

My sorority (we're the not slutty, pretty and cute and fun, honest and friendly, motivated, feminine, belive in justice and loyality, truth and friendship, faith, honor, purity, path and desire for improvement)

Sorry we just finished recruitment so I am all gushy about our values and our sisters and how amazing I think my sisters are and how I really do believe our values.

We are there for our friends when they need it most. We appreciate girls who are unique and can be themselves, can embrace their nerdy or awkward side and laugh at situations, but who also dress, speak, and act like good women, and who have the drive to improve themselves and be the best they can be at what they love.

[–]rainydayman155 points6 points  (10 children) | Copy

what is the definitive red pill relationship ?

[–]RPW Mmargerym8 points9 points  (9 children) | Copy

Like a historical/fictional example?

[–]rainydayman154 points5 points  (5 children) | Copy


[–]RPW Mmargerym9 points10 points  (2 children) | Copy

You know, it's hard to come up with something because we never quite know what is going on behind the scenes. Is JFK and Jackie current enough? Because around the 50th of his assassination I read more about her and their marriage and saw a lot of RP themes. I was inspired by how important it was to Jackie that no one see her husband in an undignified position so she laid across his body until his bodyguard covered him with his jacket. I looked at this all from Jackie's POV being a woman myself and saw a lot of what an RPW should be in that.

But it's all rather romanticized. This is just the first that came to mind.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

With all due respect, a Red Pill husband can go out a cheat, but is honor-bound not to for his loyal wife. I doubt any of the RPW here would agree to be marry to man, regardless of his stature, knowing infidelity was a given.

[–]rainydayman15-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

seems legit

[–]RPW Mmargerym5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

It's way easier to say who isn't these days, sadly. Let me think on this, too.

[–]rainydayman153 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy


[–]Mr_Mori 3 points3 points [recovered] | Copy

Tailgating on his question, I would like to hear your take on one example of each.

[–]RPW Mmargerym5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

I would like to hear an example of each, too! Let me think in this for a few minutes. Just wanted you to know I did see your inquiry.

[–]RPW Mmargerym4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

I offered JFK and Jackie as a more current historical. From what I have read Victoria and Albert were close to it, even if she was the ruler (she also despised feminism)

As for fictional- Stingray mentioned Maria and the Captain in Sound of Music (the movie) and I think she's very right.

EDIT: And from what I have read Czar Nicholas and Czarina Alexandra. She had a lot of crazy going on, though. Can't blame her. Things were a bit... stressful for them.

[–]Mr_Mori 7 points7 points [recovered] | Copy

Guys fall of their own RP trail from time to time and make mistakes. How do you deal with a guy who slips to the point where you notice but he may be mildly oblivious to?

On top of that, what are some of your techniques for re-establishing the RP ideal into your man, without causing him to deal with potential issues of emasculation?

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (1 child) | Copy

As First Mate, I consider it my responsibility to point out any fractures or signs of weakness in my relationship's overall foundation. I wouldn't immediately assign blame or try to identify the cause of the problem - but rather just alert my SO to its presence. I'm lucky in that Occam is very sharp, and detects even the slightest deviations in our routine and my overall attitude/energy level.

He actually helps me out a lot by dropping hints. If he mentions that work has been busier than usual, or that he's been trying to help some friends navigate through some problems - I take that as my cue to step up and go the extra mile. The best defense is a good offense. I strive to always make sure that I'm taking the time to make sure his needs are met. The results have been wonderful, because there's no negative energy in our relationship, and we don't have any conflicts.

[–]RPW Mmargerym9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

Up your "girl game". Femininity brings out masculinity. Ian Ironwood's advice about issuing a challenge is a good idea, too.

[–][deleted] 6 points6 points | Copy

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[–]RPW Mmargerym4 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy

  1. No. It wouldn't be of benefit to anyone, I don't think, to move away.

  2. Alpha/Beta come down to traits. Beta men with high Alpha traits are desirable and just fine. I think this is what you are asking?

  3. I think so. I know it has on my blog.

  4. No. We all have our thoughts on it, though.

[–][deleted] 5 points5 points | Copy

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[–]RPW Mmargerym7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

Not all men can be Alpha but all men can build up Alpha traits. That's really how we "handle" this. It's not about finding the Alpha, they're far too rare for us all to nab one, it's about helping our men (getting out of their way, mostly) to build up those traits.

[–]TempestTcup7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

For #2 I was actually wondering if you promote "If you want to be Queen someday, marry the prince."

Yes I wholeheartedly endorse finding the diamond in the rough and encouraging him to be the best man he can be. That's one of the benefits of finding your husband young, when you are young he is exciting and then you both work towards your future together.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Do you expect you will ever have to distance yourselves from the official TRP subreddit because of it's anti-PC delivery? TRP itself was at 3k subscribers not too long ago...

No. I made a reddit account to comment on the RPW sub, and being part of that community has been really great.

For the uninitiated woman that stumble upon RPW do you promote introducing boyfriends to TRP material and making their own alpha? I see you promote getting married young, do you also promote avoiding contextual alphas in favor of betas / greater betas with potential?(For your own daughters or RPW subscribers)

I think Married Man Sex Life, and TRP are useful tools for men. If the women are working within the RPW sub to better themselves, it only makes sense to me that their men would be looking for ways to improve (or get a better handle) on things as well.

Has engaging the feminists and white knights through subreddits like /r/purplepilldebate[1] or in the general population of reddit resulted in any converts?

There are a few ladies on the RPW sub that found us through negative posts and expected to hate us, or that used to be against our message(s). Some of our mods used to be feminists, and then they learned better. :0) Anyone can change and improve if they're willing to let go of their assumptions and actually listen.

Does RPW have an official stance on the men's right movement? MGTOW? Heartiste, Return of Kings, Rollo?

Not to my knowledge. I know we support men and have a lot of sympathy for the various piles of garbage they have to deal with simply because they're men.

[–]dropit_sphere5 points6 points  (8 children) | Copy

I've got one, actually: How would you recommend "awakening" a girl while there's still time? Schadenfreude is great and all, but some TRP members do indeed have a heart. All of the posters from RPW went through this transition at some point. Is there any way a guy could spark it or speed it up?

I'm looking for impressions and feelings more than a straight-up "method."

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

I look for opportunities to give advice, and provide an alternative point of view. I never bother to do this if I am in a group of women (too much cross-talk and derailment). When I'm one on one with a friend, I have a much easier time setting her at ease, and she becomes more honest (and less concerned with what other people listening will think).

Patience and kindness. If you listen to a person, and don't rush them - amazing things can happen. I let them work their way through justifying poor behavior, and burning through any anger they may feel...after that, they reach a point where they are finally willing and able to be open to change. I never rush my friends, and the vent sessions sometimes last quite a while, but I know it's worthwhile to sit and wait.

I never make them feel judged, or attacked. I ask simple questions, and gently nudge them in certain directions. Women have to feel that they aren't being criticized in the process of receiving advice or they are very likely to shut down.

I will share stories and disclose mistakes I may have made in the past. If you can admit you're not perfect, she will be more likely to follow suit.

Water can wear down and smooth over even the sharpest stones over time. I am a refuge, a source of calm, acceptance, and happiness. I make a point to always end the conversation with a plan for them to follow, and laughter. If my friend hasn't smiled or laughed, the conversation isn't done yet.

Not sure if that's what you were looking for or not, but either way, there it is.


[–]StingrayVC7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

When a woman is in love with a man, most want to impress him. They want him to notice her. So, notice what she does that you like. Praise her for it. If you see an example in a woman that you don't like, point it out to her. She will solipsise (is this a word? ;) ) this and compare herself to this woman (compete with her) and measure whether she is "better". She will want to do these things to earn your admiration (in a woman who is attracted to you).

She will do these things and begin to act in a more feminine way but her head might not see it yet (hamster). This is when you can begin to sway her more to the red pill way of thinking. Do it gently and teasingly (cater it to her or it won't work as well). When you say something that she doesn't agree with give her examples of how she does because she does that exact thing for you (she just doesn't want to admit it yet). Then let her see that this makes you happy.

Lastly, be her Rock. She will need you. A woman needs a herd and she likely won't find one in the world. She will be outside it. Be the herd she needs.

[–]RPW Mmargerym3 points4 points  (5 children) | Copy

Is this where I tease you about already having the pick of the litter? ;)

This is a tough one. She really has to be receptive is what it comes down to. As soon as that much is out of the way...

1) provide her with good examples of RPW 2) reward her (with praise, mostly) for being feminine (this is a biggie!) 3) be masculine. Hold your frame.

[–]dropit_sphere2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

Is this where I tease you about already having the pick of the litter? ;)

I knew you were going to say that, ha. I'm not in Utah anymore, and you of all people should know that it's possible to be feminist there and in the associated cultural milieu.

What do you mean by examples? Did you notice women that you would now describe as more RP, and they made an impression on you?

[–]RPW Mmargerym2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy

You know how I was raised, of course I saw women like this. ;) I also read a lot of classic novels. I think Jane Austen is "in" for a reason, let's just say. There are tons of historical and fictional examples of women being women. It's even helpful to point them out when you seem them say on TV or in a movie, etc.

[–]dropit_sphere2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Excellent, thank you.

[–]dropit_sphere2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

The reason, btw, that I ask, is that the hardest feminists to deal with are the ones who are convinced they're not feminists.

[–]RPW Mmargerym2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Eliza R. Snow, not Emma, is the best historical example I find. Just throwing that out there. She knew how to be a wife and how to submit. Emma, not so much.

[–]dsrpta6 points7 points  (3 children) | Copy

  • What do you do when you suddenly realize you're hamstering about something?

  • What steps do you take to control your hamster, so it isn't as big of a problem next time?

  • How would you advise or teach other women to control their hamsters?

[–]RPW Mmargerym7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

  • Take a breather. Give myself a "suck it up, buttercup" talking to. Remove myself from the situation until I can think clearly.

  • I really try and think things through, first. If I feel a response is coming from my chest and not my head (you know, that upset build up you get in your chest when you are responding emotionally not intellectually) I try and real it in. Most times I take it to my husband or trust worthy friends "am I being totally emotional about this?"

  • By sharing the steps above and telling them "don't believe everything you feel"

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

What do you do when you suddenly realize you're hamstering about something?

I worry over silly things, that really aren't worth thinking about. A comment to a friend that might be misinterpreted, if I made an error on paperwork, why is everyone always in such a rush at the store? My SO simply reminds me when I'm worrying over non-issues, and that's the only prompt I need to let it go.

When he isn't around, I'll usually make a list or write out exactly what the problem is. If I can't define concrete repercussions for failing to address the issue, I drop it.

What steps do you take to control your hamster, so it isn't as big of a problem next time?

Work out, listen to music, spend more time with my SO, take some time to relax, draw, or read. Positive outlets that focus my energy into useful tasks, as opposed to endless thought-loops.

What steps do you take to control your hamster, so it isn't as big of a problem next time?

Remove yourself from the situation. Pretend you are talking to someone you really dislike. If they came to you with this same problem or line of thinking - how much sympathy and tolerance would you afford them?

[–]PenguinLovr0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

What do you do when you suddenly realize you're hamstering about something?

A. don't realize it

B. Ignore the realization and hamster it

C. Stop what I'm doing, withdraw, and contemplate my actions

D. Immediately dismiss my hamstering and let it go entirely

Its usually one of those. Ideally it would be C all the time. Nature is hard to fight.

[–]bgny6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

I just wanted to say thanks to the RPW going against the grain of today's feminized culture and having the courage to express it. I have been MGTOW for the last few years, but hearing you talk gives me hope that it's not impossible that there could be a good woman in my future. Keep fighting the good fight and being good to your men!

[–]RPW Mmargerym2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Be sure to send her our way, if and when you find her.

[–]itsonlyabottle3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

Hi All - For margerym - What truly convinced you to become part of the Red Pill movement and changed your beliefs on the whole aspect of mating?

[–]RPW Mmargerym8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

A lot of things I found in Red Pill were things I already knew on some level and when I found it I felt very vindicated in a way. Like "Yes! I knew it! And people thought I was crazy!" I pretty much said just that to my husband. Nothing had to convince me, per se. I saw the truth in it immediately. If it was any one thing, though, it'd be the idea of SMV.

I'm not quite understanding the second part of your question, could you expound?

[–][deleted] 4 points4 points | Copy

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[–]StingrayVC4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Context is important. Very important. Because women can sympathize with feminism ideals and not realize how detrimental they can be. We can face the detriment after we face why women wanted feminism to begin with.

[–]RPW Mmargerym5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

No, I will never ever ignore it. We live in it. They have to know all about it in order to arm themselves against it. I give them my opinion but also teach them about it objectively. It's not all "this is the worse thing ever, run away!" It's important they get it on an intellectual level.

[–]Endorsed ContributorDoxasticPoo4 points5 points  (5 children) | Copy

We often mention how a woman doesn't love like we expect, hope or want them to. And some go as far to say women don't love, they are loved.

What's your reaction? How do you view love? What would you expect to get from someone who "loves" you and what would you expect to give?

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy

The love I have for my SO is very different from the love he has for me, and that's all right. He has readily admitted that he would put himself in harm's way for me - his love comes in the form of protection (among other things). As much as I like to think otherwise, I don't believe I have that same instinct. It's impossible to know for certain how I'd react in a dangerous situation without actually being in danger, but based on my natural reactions to being nervous/afraid - my impulse is usually to run away and hide.

My SO has previous experiences with legitimate danger, and he did not turn tail and run, so when he says he will protect me, I know that's not just a line. My love is not the same as his, but it is complimentary, where he provides strength, I bring tenderness. My love is more nurturing. I spend a lot of time focusing on non-critical concerns, that he would normally just ignore.

Respect plays a huge role for me when it comes to showing my SO that I love him. I listen to what he has to say, I trust him to lead, and I am supportive. I tend to his physical and emotional needs and make sure that he does not feel neglected. I do not harp or minimize his actions, and I do not turn him away when he tries to spend time with me. The reason TRP focuses so much on maintaining frame is because they know women need to respect their men in order to love them. If a woman doesn't respect a man, she cannot love him.

I'm not bothered when TRP says women don't love in the same way as men because I agree. I think everyone (sans psychopaths) can love to varying degrees. Some women will love more deeply than others, some will only love on a very shallow level. I think you can partially gauge a woman's ability to care and love by examining how self-absorbed she is. Women that worship material goods and crave the attention of many people, may seek to be loved more than to actually give love.

[–]Endorsed ContributorDoxasticPoo4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

OMG... you are awesome.

The "love" you describe, honestly, is the love that men want.

I couldn't care less if a girl would take a bullet for me. Because really, if a gun came out I'd be the one standing in front of it, not her.

But when you said, "I bring tenderness. My love is more nurturing.", I swear my heart sank. Because I have yet to meet a woman like that.

Do the world a favor, have many children. So that your way of viewing love may pass down and make future generations of men as fortunate as your husband.

[–]Endorsed ContributorDoxasticPoo2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Actually, I'm going to rewrite one sentence.

"Because I have yet to meet a woman like that while dating."

The last two words are important. Because I have experienced women like you but just as friends. I've come to realize that I put myself in the friendzone, not women. Because I'm attracted to the love I feel when we're friends. But I've never met a women who would be like that when we're more than friends. And I think it's because women don't want to date a weak man. And nurturing/tenderness implies someone is weak. So instead of putting bandaids on my wounds then poke at them thinking it will make me stronger. Irony is, it only makes me weaker. Whereas a bandaid was all I needed in the moment. And had I gotten that, I could have regained the strength she found so attractive in the first place.

Still though. I like you.

[–]PenguinLovr-2 points-1 points  (1 child) | Copy

I think that it means that women don't love the way you want them to; unconditionally. Love should be conditional, but that doesn't mean love isn't real.

[–]Endorsed ContributorDoxasticPoo1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Totally. I'm not saying it's not real. It's just really confusing to see it from my perspective, thereby defining from my perspective, and not seeing it in return.

The fix is to get the proper perspective.

[–]1mrust4 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy

I read through your list of acronyms expecting them to be very similar to what we have in TRP, but actually you have almost double! SMA.

We talk about Hamsters and The Wall and NAWALT and One-Itis.

What concepts/tropes have you discovered within RPW by talking and comparing experiences with other Red Pill Women?

[–]TempestTcup7 points8 points  (2 children) | Copy

LOL, I ripped off every list of acronyms that I could find and added them all together!

[–]1mrust2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Interesting, does that mean there are other specific communities besides TRP that you see RPW to be the intersection of?

[–]TempestTcup4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

I got some of them off of Married Man Sex Life, and I think Heartiste and some other sites - mainly red pill manosphere sites.

[–][deleted] 4 points4 points | Copy

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[–]TempestTcup2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I didn't think that he would disagree with it for long, the RP is tough to swallow, but he's always been a mostly alpha conservative and realized a few years earlier that everything we had been told about food was a lie when we went paleo.

There was a risk of him reading everything and deciding that I just wasn't worth the effort, but luckily that didn't happen! Whew.

[–]specter5041 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Awesome. Coming back to this when I leave work.

[–]bama79rolltide4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy


How would you feel if you had a son, and he was a PUA?

[–]RPW Mmargerym8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

Concerned for his health, mostly. ;)

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy


Can you give examples of your husband's former Beta behaviour, and what you needed to see as far change to help your marriage?

[–]TempestTcup5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

He wasn't really ever very beta; he was super natural alpha when I met him: pilot by 18, skydiver, rock climber, fought competitively in high school, scuba, etc. He was a fun and exciting guy! After a decade or two I guess I broke him down little by little by nagging and fitness testing, and he went along to get along, which was the wrong response!

Our marriage was always good, but now it is really great. We are so much happier not butting heads all the time.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Glad to hear. Thanks for the insight.

[–][deleted] 4 points4 points | Copy

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[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

the type of devotion men want from women that is called love is inspired by the male's high value and dominance. its not that women dont love, its that they love differently than men. you can see this as an icky tragedy or you can accept it, deal with it and learn to inspire it.

[–]PenguinLovr-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

My belief is that when we (RP network) say "all women are the same" we are generalizing. Some women are truly different, but it's rarely like that in every way possible. The idea is to figure out what qualities are most important to you and finding a women who displays those qualities. Sometimes she may dissapoint you and fall back and do things most women do by nature, but it's a guys role to show her what's right, and to inspire her to want to better herself. Most RPW agree that 100% Red Pill is not neccessary. In fact, these women ARE appreciative of the "blue pill" aspect of their mostly alpha mates. Unlike the majority of women who take advantage of that.

[–]tallwheel3 points4 points  (11 children) | Copy

What do you think of Men Going Their Own Way (MGTOW)?

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

The important thing is that they probably don't care what my opinion is one way or the other. :0)

That said, I tend to agree with them on many things, and I support the movement.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

i think they are doing the smartest thing a lot of men could do today,, then again im an objectivist so anything going galt is going to resonate with me

[–]PenguinLovr-2 points-1 points  (8 children) | Copy

I do feel sorry for them while understanding where they are coming from. Love is a beautiful yet rare thing. I truly wish everyone could experience it.

[–]tallwheel3 points4 points  (7 children) | Copy

Are you operating under the assumption that most MGTOWs have never experienced LTR's/marriage? Because this is not necessarily the case. In my experience most of the folks on MGTOW Forums are divorced or have had multiple LTR's. These men have experienced what most of us refer to as "love" and decided it is too much trouble for them to bother with. Yes, there are a few Omega virgin MGTOW as well, but many seem to falsely assume that this constitutes the majority.

[–]suscitare2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

What advice would you give a man trying to navigate this current society and find the red pill woman of his dreams?

[–]omegainvictus 3 points3 points [recovered] | Copy

In college, where's the best type of place to find RPW/ where do you think they congregate?

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (3 children) | Copy

find a reasonably young feminine girl and make her into one with your presence. they really dont occur in the wild that much, they are a reaction to an alpha male

[–]eatplaycrush6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy

I can agree. Not a mod, but I am 21 and the only reason I was introduced to this train of thought was because of my boyfriend. He was the one who taught me these things so I can only support that it is a reaction to an alpha male. If I was still surrounded by my so-called friends that I had prior to this then I would be an absolute mess to put it nicely. With females in my age group it's going to be super sad slim pickings to find a natural RPW train thought. This is the age where we are suppose to be "finding ourselves" which basically means go to school, drink cheap beer until we black out, post pictures of it everywhere, and think it's completely okay to be a slut. Not everyone is going to be that extreme, but that is the basis of my age group today.

[–]omegainvictus 3 points3 points [recovered] | Copy

Would you say it's impossible to reform a party girl?

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

no i wouldnt, but the amount of sheer caveman alpha it takes often treads on illegal territory

[–]PenguinLovr0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Maybe my sorority...haha...we are very much women on the same general path as RPW. But we still need to be lead by an alpha to be better.

[–]omegainvictus 3 points3 points [recovered] | Copy

Unfortunately those change from chapter to chapter at different unis.

[–]alcockell2 points3 points  (10 children) | Copy

I'm curious - how do red pill women view a bloke such as myself - who is saving himself for marriage?

Granted, I'm dealing with a lot of damage (Asperger Syndrome - was diagnosed in 1987 at 16, one of the first to be diagnosed in the UK); suffered low-level sexual abuse from girls my age at age 12-13 (chorono age 8) - derailed my sexuality completely; horrendous bullying through school... basically a perfect storm. Am currently working on the weight...

But when I was lighter, I did have some offers, but knocked them back as sense of ethics and a strong Christian faith meant that I can't lie with my body.

Blue Pill and PUA would have me down as a lost cause... but is that truly the case?

I'm 42 at the mo.. would a late-bloomer like myself be able to win the heart of a good RP woman?

For the record, I'm also active over at MMSL, using the same username.

[–]RPW Mmargerym2 points3 points  (9 children) | Copy

This is greatly going to depend on the RPW. There are some women out there whether overtly RPW or RPW "in spirit" that are in a similar boat as you. You're probably not going to get a 10 but it's not impossible for you to get a good woman.

[–]alcockell1 point2 points  (8 children) | Copy

As is visible on my MMSL threads, I'm working on getting the weight down and the fitness back.. and psych for the abuse...

But regarding the male virginity and how this is apparently not viewed very highly.. it does seem a rather unfortunate double standard.. I couldn't in all conscience sleep with someone outside of marriage because I couldn't in all conscience take OR give what wasn't legitimately mine. God's seen me through the horrendous experiences I had in my childhood, given me a good career - how could i smack Him in the mouth like that?

In that context - would this aspect of me be viewed as high or low value?

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

I'm new to RPW, but my husband was a virgin when we met (I took care of that very quickly though), and I love that he was a virgin. I felt guilty that my number was higher (and still do a bit), but I felt special and comforted knowing I'm the only girl he's ever slept with. However, he was way younger than you, and I'm not sure what I would think of a man who was that age and a virgin, but it being religious I think makes it a bit easier to understand.

I would be way more turned off by needing to wait until marriage. I refuse to go into that kind of commitment blind.

[–]alcockell0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Just for completion - here's the full intro I sent to MMSL...

I grew up suffering the abuse described right alongside the AIDS crisis in full flow, AND Dworkin-era sex-negative feminism. So - that little lot can tend to derail everything for years..

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I'd say of all your problems being a virgin is one of the least troubling of all. It's really just a symptom, not the main problem.

[–]RPW Mmargerym1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

As I said, this really depends on the woman herself. Some women, namely religious minded RPW, are going to find this beneficial but not others.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

since most women are nice and i am not i will answer. a man who doesnt have the vetting of other women having found him attractive by sleeping with him or having LTR with him is going to have a lot of trouble outside i guess your specific religious community. since women are the actively pursued sex, a woman who retains her virginity is showing (to men) restraint and good character int the face of an onslaught of male suitors. a male who has no sexual history by your age will generally be seen as having failed to attract women and will mark you as low value to anyone who doesnt share your specific religious beliefs. this may sound unfair, but thats the way it is. women seek men who have been "preselected" by other women as attractive, its part of the staus seeking and ranking process of female mating. youre religious values are fine, but to anyone that doesnt share them they just appear alien and will not help you attract anyone who doesnt share them.

[–]alcockell1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

So I'm effectively dead in the water.


Any Baptist monasteries around?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

there are women who do not require super alpha aggressive game,you will have to set your sights low no more or less than an older woman would, there is a place for almost eveyrone in the sexual market place, its just not always the place we want. im 44, if i were to end up sigle tomorrow my sexual market value would be low, but it wouldnt disappear--if i only set my sights on the highest possible value males id be "dead in the water" we have to be realistic. cant you look in your church?

[–]alcockell0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Considering I've never really "dated" or "courted" either... I don't really have any clue how it all works.

Is there any third-party assistance that can be called upon to ease the path for someone like me? Neurotypical RP-friendly "mentors" for instance?

Just that if you look around at the stuff on AS - Game is pretty much impossible for Aspies... then again - I have a long way to go on my MMSL MAP..

Maybe one day, some of the excesses of Combat Dating and Combat Marriage will be tempered...

[–]Gold-Summary5 points6 points  (5 children) | Copy

What advice do you have for parents with daughters? How can we teach our girls to treat guys?

You want your girls to grow up and become a valuable member of society, but not end up as a toy for some pig, and you also don't want her to become part of the big problem -- a princess that accumulates orbiters... etc.

I'm new to TRP and I happen to love this concept, but I'm still trying to figure out how to incorporate it as a parent without causing harm to anyone. I personally think that a lot of games going on between the sexes are evil and that they should stop... but I can see how it's empowering for some betas to become more alpha. I can see good and bad alpha behavior from men. I can see good and bad submissive behavior from women.

I'd just love to hear what you ladies have to say about TRP for young women.

[–]RPW Mmargerym6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

I answered this a bit a few days ago here /r/RedPillWomen/comments/1vj3bv/advice_a_father_of_a_six_year_old_girl/cesroiq

I am also raising daughters and this is heavy on my mind daily. My #1 piece of advice is live it and surround your daughters with people that live it. Not Red Pill per se, as that would be hard, but there are still examples of good women out there in life, literature, history, etc.

[–]Gold-Summary2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks this is exactly what I was looking for! :)

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (2 children) | Copy

I don't have any children, but I think you have to start the process before girls start noticing boys. If you raise your daughter to respect authority, use her head to think critically, and build her self-esteem up (so that she doesn't feel the need to conform to peer pressure, or follow the heard on widely accepted ideas like feminism), then she has a big advantage over other girls. She needs to know that she doesn't have to expose her body to feel validated, or drink to have fun. If she's active physically with sports and mentally with school clubs (debate team, for example), then she won't need a guy to make her feel worthwhile. Women that crave the attention of many men, will have a harder time feeling satisfied and content when they try to invest in one man.

If she has a stable and positive home life, that's a major plus. That said, even if you, as a parent, do everything right - your daughter still might make a wrong turn. So it's just as important that you teach her to accept responsibility for her actions, and don't spoil her rotten. If you give children whatever they want, whenever they want it - they become ungrateful. Gifts won't mean as much to them, and they won't have a great deal of appreciation for the things they do have. My favorite example to use is this:

If you give your 16 year old child a car on their birthday, they won't appreciate it as much as the 16 year old that had to pay for half of it, or wait until they were older to get their own car. When you have to work for something, you feel a lot more satisfied when you actually get it.

[–]Gold-Summary3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

This is really awesome advice. Thanks! :)

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

No worries, glad I could help! >'O'<

[–]0ringer1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Hey RPW mods! I'm a fan of your board, and find the information there just as (if not more) interesting as RP.

My question is this: If you have a male (unwittingly BP) friend that is having difficulty attracting women how do you advise them? Do you tell them about the red pill, and or other reading materials? or do you offer specific advice to their current situation?

What do you think would be the most important thing to impart to him?

[–]RPW Mmargerym2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I would definitely tell him he needs to work on himself first. "if you build it, they will come" sort of thing. I'd encourage him to accept his masculinity and run with it.

[–]PenguinLovr-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

I sometimes tell them about the red pill. I just honestly tell them what I think they need. I believe I am a good judge of emotional matters, considering I experience emotions very vividly. I accept my state, and therefore will give them personalized honest advice.

[–]16 MGaiusScaevolus1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

One of our major premises is that men and women are fundamentally different. What major ways would you say RPW is similar to/different from the rest of the RP network? (RP, BaM, AskTRP)

[–]PenguinLovr0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

same: at the core we believe that men and women are different. That men should be leaders.

different: a rpw's agenda is not helping men get the best out of their situation with a population of average and sub standard women. Its to rise above the status quo for women being given a so called pussy pass. It's to improve themselves while also putting their mate first. Their relationship is their number 1 priority in their lives.

[–]Tway_the_Parley1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

What do you think that TRP and RPW needs to change?

[–]RPW Mmargerym1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

In themselves or in the world?

[–]Tway_the_Parley1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

In themselves

[–]RPW Mmargerym1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

This really depends on the person themselves, the level they are at. But accepting their innate natures would be a good starting point.

[–]Tway_the_Parley1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Sorry if my original question wasnzt clear, but I was talking about the subs in general.

[–]PenguinLovr-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

The Red Pill need to be confident with how they really think and feel and be comfortable in leading women they wish to date (not just pumping and dumping them)

RPW needs to embrace their feminine side more and better themselves on a spiritual, emotional, and practical ways.

[–]brokecollegekidd1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Hi, I recently made an account on reddit, and have not commented on many things, but I recently saw an reference to this sub-reddit, and so I came to check it out. After what I've read, I am still trying to grasp my head or "swallow the red pill" so to speak. I am an 18 year old male currently in college. I have dated before and have been in a few relationships, and I would like to ask a few questions.

I've always been a nice guy. A lot of girls I have known (friends and ex-gfs) have told me I'm a "really genuine guy". From what I've read on TRP so far, it seems that just being the nice guy is not the way to find a relationship, is this necessarily true? and also, if I am in a relationship with someone, should i be trying to get them to swallow the pill as well? I just feel like I'm trying to tell a woman "know your place" which seems a little too harsh in a place where most woman are more feminist than not.

sorry if this response seems strange, I am pretty new to this idea and as a man coming "into my prime" so to speak, i feel like what is being preached on these sub reddits could really be beneficial to long, healthy relationships in the future( as i do not want to go the way my parents did)

[–]PenguinLovr-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

I feel like being a "nice guy" should be reserved for someone who deserves it. You are the prize - not the girls you try to win over with being "nice". Only after a girl has proven her value, should you reward her with your true self, your genuine self.

Mystery is more coveted than niceness. If you hold back on constantly validating a woman, it would optimize your chance of finding a woman who doesn't thrive on attention. At the same time affection and closeness are fundamental in a relationship. But don't you want to reserve such feelings for a woman who is truly right for you?

The way to do it is to have standards and not be afraid to call women out on their shit tests, even if it offends them. Being "Mr Nice Guy" isn't doing you favors. Real relationship material can handle constructive, honest criticism. Those girls who want to improve themselves and keep a man they adore happy, are the ones who will stick it out for a guy who isn't afraid to take his rightful masculine role in the relationship. And part of that is to lead and provide. "Mr Nice Guy" doesn't make her feel like that. Perhaps its because he might be capable of providing, it doesn't mean he is a good leader. And women want to be lead.

[–]Hardparty1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

What is the Red Pill Women sub about

[–]PenguinLovr2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Read the RPW FAQ! If you have any more questions after this gets answered feel free to ask them!

[–]hiccupsweets3 points4 points  (7 children) | Copy

Hey RPW mods! As someone who has just recently encountered your philosophy and has identified as a feminist, what would you say is the most convincing part, to you personally, about your philosophy to someone who potentially identifies as a feminist?

I know the subreddit have semi-addressed this in the recent post about being ex-feminists, but I am curious to what you may say in this AMA :) I also promise (though on Reddit, this means nothing) that I am NOT trying to troll. I honestly just came across this way of philosophy and would love to know more.

[–]RPW Mmargerym3 points4 points  (6 children) | Copy

I don't quite understand the question.

[–]hiccupsweets3 points4 points  (5 children) | Copy

I guess I wasn't being clear, since perhaps I'm not completely all sure either! How about this: what, for you, was the most convincing thing about the RPW/TRP philosophy? If you were trying to 'convince' someone into this philosophy (which I completely understand isn't your mission), what would you say, especially in relation to your own personal experiences?

Again, I understand that a lot of the basics of RPW/TRP philosophy is in the FAQ - I'm potentially trying to get at the more personal side for all you mods!

[–]RPW Mmargerym5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

This is a great question, almost like asking us for our elevator pitch.

Natural gender roles. That's where my "pitch" would be based, the idea that abandoning the understanding of natural gender roles has made us less not more happy. They worked for us before, why is that? Why has abandoning them harmed us so much? etc

[–]hiccupsweets1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Ahh, exactly! An elevator pitch is actually the perfect way to describe what I'm asking for. Thank you also for your thoughtful response :) this whole community has definitely given me a lot to think about!

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

The Red Pill Woman lifestyle resonated with many things I had always thought, and grew up understanding. Finding the RPW sub simply gave concrete form to wordless instincts I had always carried with me.

[–]hiccupsweets1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Not to be too leading, but what would you say those "wordless instincts" were, for you specifically? Obviously, from what I read on the sub, I know the core tenets of RPW philosophy, but which of those tenets (or the combination) resonated most with you?

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Well, I was never comfortable with the casual hook-up culture, having sex with random people seemed repulsive. I didn't see how I'd be able to maintain any amount of respect for myself if I let just anyone into my bedroom.

I don't like loud parties, where people get sloppy and drunk. If you're doing something drunk that you wouldn't do sober - that's a HUGE red flag in my book. I saw a lot of my peers acting out, and they didn't seem happier or more content with life than I was, so I dismissed their way of "having fun."

I was taught that no one is responsible for my actions or my words except for me. No one else is supposed to make sure I stay safe or make good decisions, that's my job. I learned my limits, and adhered to them.

[–]Endorsed ContributorDoxasticPoo4 points5 points  (22 children) | Copy

Personally, I'm curious whether this is all just the next step in female manipulation. Men seem to be changing in so many ways that are appealing to women. We go to PUA seminars. Become more alpha. Become more attractive.

What are women doing? Or are men improving themselves just to find the same old girl at bar after bar after bar?

[–]RPW ECFleetingWish2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

All people manipulate to get what they want out of people. What matters is how successful they are at it. PUAs who are bad at manipulating women are hated by women, while PUAs who are good at it get lots of sex. Same with women. Women who are bad at manipulating men are resented by men (especially red pill men, but betas too), where as women who are good at pressing men's buttons in the right way are adored by them. People like it when their buttons are pushed the right way, and they gravitate towards people who are better at pushing them.

[–]Endorsed ContributorDoxasticPoo2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I agree 100%.

There is nothing I love more than a woman who makes me feel like more of myself than I ever have. Who drives me to do the things I love. Who helps keep my life in order. Who keeps me on track.

I've always said there's 2 kinds of women that you'll date.

There are parasites. Who come into your life, take it over and eventually destroy you.

And there's rockfuel for your car. Where sure, gasoline is what you usually put in there. But once you get some rocket fuel you're off!

This is what you're describing. Some women manipulate only for their benefit. Others make sure their man gets something out of it too.

I like to think of the scene in The Avengers where Iron Man comes home to his girl after underwater welding. He wants to stay in and bang the shit out of her, but she knows what's best for him. She'd like to get attention from him but he has "homework to do." So she leaves, sacrificing a night of attention and sex so that he can prepare to save the world.

He gets to be the awesome badass. And now she's with a guy who's probably got the highest SMV of ANY man on earth! (Rich, smart, sexy, confident, AND saved the world from evil!)

This is an example of positive manipulation. And men love it.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy

I think it's up to men to develop criteria and refine their nonsense barometer so they can differentiate between good women and women pretending to be good. As Red Pill women, we face the same dilemma. We have to know when a we're dealing with good RP men that are actually interested in (or, at least open to) a committed relationship and men that just want to turn us into another plate. Both men and women stand to lose something. Men can get worked over financially, while women can fritter away their value by accruing multiple partners. Both sexes stand to experience emotional scarring.

I would say that if you are dissatisfied with the quality of women that you're encountering, then you should start looking in different places. Bars and clubs are going to attract a certain type of personality. Women that enjoy going out, getting attention and partying will naturally frequent social hot-spots. Start looking in bookstores, churches, in community volunteer groups, at animal shelters, hiking clubs etc. The definition of insanity is something along the lines of "doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results" (Einstein...?). Increase your chances of meeting higher quality women by looking for them in new places.

I'm sure some women will use certain tactics to manipulate and coerce men, this should be nothing new to you as a TRP subscriber. That's why it's important for you to have enough skill to spot the frauds and excise them from your life. A little caution and common sense go a long way.

[–]Endorsed ContributorDoxasticPoo1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

Good point. However you missed a fundamental tenet of TRP.


So whether I'm at a bar, a bookstore or a church. AWALT. "Filtering" is of no use.

And yes, I'm pretty sure it was Einstein.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

It depends on whether you simply want to hook up, or if you sincerely want a relationship. Men that want a relationship, have to alter it to "All Women Are Probably (but not absolutely) Like That. You go from automatically dismissing every woman, to filtering for certain triggers and qualities that make her undesirable personality wise. If you truly believe that all women are liars, cheaters, whores, and manipulative - then you're not going to recognize a good women even if you do meet one. You'll assume it's a mask hiding deeper problems. You need to know what you want, and use fitness testing to see how a woman that catches your eye stacks up. I'm not saying it's easy, but I do think it's worthwhile.

My SO started a series that focuses on men currently in, or looking for LTR's. I'll provide the links below:

1. LTR Game: Maintaining Frame

2. LTR Game Part 2: Building the Foundation

3. LTR Game Part 3: Unicorn Hunter Checklist

4. LTR Game Part 4: Positive Masculinity

TRP is about men improving themselves and taking control of their lives. This sub is big on accepting responsibility for your actions and attitudes. If you aren't physically fit, then that's your fault for not hitting the gym more. This is a wonderful and pro-active mentality, and it's applicable to looking for a good woman. If you aren't meeting good women, then you aren't doing enough to locate, recognize, and filter for them. If you aren't attracting the quality of woman that you desire, then you probably aren't as high value as you think. If you treat all women poorly, then naturally you are going to chase away the good ones because they have enough sense to avoid you.

This is something we strive to teach the ladies on the RPW sub, we don't want just any RP man, but rather a good RP man.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Of course.

But some men get tired of spinning plates. If you really only want to have sex, then you neednt worry about RPW at all, since you will never encounter them at bars/whatnot and wont be able to get them to have sex with you anyway. For other men, they want children eventually, and that kinda requires a LTR. Regardless of whether women are 'horrible', you should at least respect that some people want meaningful relationships once they reach a certain age. We want to find the highest quality of THOSE guys, and make sure they pick us, because we are making sure we are the least Hamster-y and the most faithful and the ones who can make them the happiest.

Women are the gatekeepers of Sex, and Men of Relationships. Its your choice whether you want to enter a relationship even knowing the risks, just as its my choice whether to have sex with someone even knowing that the risk is my lowered value. I would only take that risk if I thought the man would be very likely to enter a LTR with me or we are already together. Not as a way to trap him, but because why would I waste my only "resource" on a guy who only wants pussy? Only whores do that.

RPW and TRP having EXACTLY opposite goals makes perfect sense. A woman swallowing the the RP means she has to accept that she should never have sex with men for no reason, that men want sex more than relationships every time, and that quality men will only LTR high quality women, if at all. Those are truths. If she wants a relationship she will have to work for it and maintain it every day just like men work for sex. RedPill has no overall agenda, its just truths for either gender. We use that information differently.

[–]Endorsed ContributorDoxasticPoo1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Ok. So it's not that you're a unicorn. It's that you accept who you are yet because you want a relationship, family, etc... you choose to go in a different direction than a "slut".

I guess in a way a RP man wanting a LTR does the same. Cuz deep down guys wanna fuck as many of the hottest girls as possible. But a RP man wanting a LTR is putting that "natural urge" aside for his desire to have a family and LTR.

Makes sense.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I would also like to point out that feminism has actually made it hilariously easy for guys to fuck the hottest babes whenever they want. 200 years ago, these game techniques wouldnt work out very well because women were all instructed not to let men do that. A woman hanging out at a bar ready to go home with someone would be a prostitute, ostracized by the town. But women couldn't really hamster either, because her parents would drill into her head to take care of the family first, to be faithful, etc. Everyone used to have to put aside their urges because if you didnt have lots of strong male children, you had no one to help you with your work, no one to inherit your house, and you were going to die alone on the side of the road as soon as you age past your prime or hurt yourself.

And they did die alone on the side of the road sometimes. And women did get trapped in truly abusive situations. Hence social security and divorce was born, to try to keep a safety net. Unfortunately safety nets mean you dont have to try anymore..

[–]RPW Mmargerym2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy

I think your fear is valid. The bigger this gets the more women are going to use it to manipulate men.

What are women doing? We're learning to keep our mouths shut, to respect men, to take better care of ourselves and not expect men to love us/find us attractive simply because we have vaginas. Feminism has robbed us of femininity and we are trying to get it back while ditching the entitlement it handed to us and told us would make us happy.

[–]Endorsed ContributorDoxasticPoo-1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy

Interesting choice in words....

I didn't say I was "afraid", but I understand why you went that direction. You are, now, manipulating me. (or at least trying)


Seriously though, did you intentionally use the NLP, twist of words here to manipulate the conversation into one where I was "afraid"? Thereby making it a situation where there's a good & bad, where you are the "good". Thereby putting me in your favor. ESPECIALLY since men love the comfort of a "good" woman when there's trouble.... oh man I love that shit.

Or was that twist of words just natural? Just a part of being a woman?

[–]RPW Mmargerym0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

No. "FEAR: an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat."

It's a way of saying "you're concern over women using this to manipulate men is founded" not a way of saying "you're such a big scaredy cat, come to mama"

[–]Endorsed ContributorDoxasticPoo1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Damn you, Webster!!!

Ok. I'm going to just interpret your first response as you didn't mean to do it. It was just natural. And that you wanted to say, "That is a possibility."

But even to say, "Your concern...", again, I did not make this into "a concern" or something that requires good/bad; where you end up in the "good" camp for providing comfort, understanding, willingness to "be different".

I was just curious.

Granted, I did say, "...just to find...", but that's more of an expression of frustration.

You used the words "fear" and "concern", not me. So you are the one reframing the conversation.

And it's ok. I honestly don't care. I was, again, more curious about whether you intentionally reframed or unintentionally reframed.

[–]TempestTcup2 points3 points  (6 children) | Copy

LOL, why are you looking for good women in bars? All you are going to find there are bar sluts and the occasional married woman with her husband.

The only manipulation that we advocate is to manipulate our husbands with sweetness, looking good, filling his belly and emptying his balls :)

[–]Endorsed ContributorDoxasticPoo1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

True that! Bars are a terrible place to find decent woman.

But the point wasn't specifically about bars. The point could still be made had I said any location of your choosing.

Wherever we go, will we still find the same woman? And remember, AWALT. So where we actually go is irrelevant.

The only manipulation that we advocate is to manipulate our husbands with sweetness, looking good, filling his belly and emptying his balls :)

That sounds nice.

[–]TempestTcup2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

Find a sweet introverted girl with a low N (I know, I know, unicorn) and turn her into a RPW. We weren't born this way!

[–]Endorsed ContributorDoxasticPoo1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

That would be very, very nice. I like I's. INFP is by far my kind of woman.

[–]TempestTcup2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

It's funny but most RPW are either INTJ or a close variation. Yes, go forth and find an introvert!!!

[–]Endorsed ContributorDoxasticPoo1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

You're a HIGH N? Oh man... that's my FAVORITE.

Couple that with a high T, you're awesome.

[–]TempestTcup1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy


[–]PenguinLovr-2 points-1 points  (2 children) | Copy

I don't think that if you are doing this for a woman, that you are doing it for the right reasons. Its about you being fulfilled. Red pill women care about that. Not about you trying to change yourself. Its about being comfortable with who you are, being confident enough in yourself that you feel like you could lead the women you date; not the other way around with them tugging at the strings. "Women" as a whole aren't doing a damn thing, but the women on RedPillWomen at least actively try to undergo a metamorphosis turning them into more beautiful, lively, and graceful/elegant women towards their man.

[–]Endorsed ContributorDoxasticPoo1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I agree 100%. Doing anything for woman is not the right reason, especially self-improvement.

So I guess the same could be said about women. "Improving" for us men is for the wrong reason.

Maybe I should just keep doing my thing, see what women do, and if one day I do find that girl who's genuinely caring, giving, loving, nurturing, affectionate, forgiving, understanding (you know, what "femininity" used to be), as well as trustworthy, positively manipulative, and actually gives a shit about ME (so, not completely solipsistic).

Then I guess I jump onboard. Until then, I just do my thing.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

If you really want this, you are going to have to work really hard. The women like on RPW are so so rare, especially if you dont particularly want to marry someone religious/conservative.

Honestly, and this is totally serious, my boyfriend right now found me because he put up a poster at my university asking for a tutor in exchange for teaching Korean to whoever wanted it. But the poster totally made me think he was female because it had smiles on it and looked "female-ish". I really wanted to learn a language and I thought tutoring someone in exchange for language skills would be neat, but I never would have texted the number for the info and went that first day if id known he was male. Being alone with guys iv never met makes me nervous.

I was also totally going to never go there again and never text him back. But then he texted me that I had forgotten something after that first meeting (he had my number because I had texted him off the poster..), and wouldnt tell me what it was, so I had to go back a few days later and meet him again. I arrived and had supposedly left a single pencil that he just HAD to return. But then he made me help him with his work while I was there, and then I felt bad because he really did need help, so I agreed to meet up again later (all of this in the library). He never once tried to get me into bed either. ALL he did was ask me to tutor him, and ask me a million questions about my life, text me, and "accidentally" walk me to my car after we finished every night. Eventually, guess who initiated it? Me. The rest is history.

Genius level shit. He told me much later he did that on purpose to the poster because no one wants to help guys. That he said I left something because he knew I might not come again. He knew exactly what he was doing the entire time, meanwhile I was falling hook line and sinker and had no idea what he was doing.

So you better develop some crazy ass strategy if you want to compete and find those girls before someone else takes them. Hes 8 years older than me too so you better have that going for you.

[–]chillmonkey883 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

If you are reading this right now... save this thread... This is one that is worth it

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (26 children) | Copy

When has your other halves' behaviour become unacceptable and how did you resolve that?

I'm speaking about.... Too much stereotypical RP rather than dealing with a beta Captain. So, let's pretend you were acting like a cunt and he stepped out (Soft nexted you). What if you thought you weren't acting like a cunt?

What if you were acting a cunt and you knew it?

I'd be really interested to hear how you guys would process that.

[–]RPW Mmargerym5 points6 points  (20 children) | Copy

When has your other halves' behaviour become unacceptable and how did you resolve that?

It hasn't. But your examples aren't what I consider "unacceptable"

What if you thought you weren't acting like a cunt?

If he thinks I was I probably was. I try and shut up and think on it before I react.

What if you were acting a cunt and you knew it?

He usually knows when I know and puts my in my place, calls me on it. "Go pout in the room until you can address me like an adult" sort of thing.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (19 children) | Copy

So if you were acting out and he went and slept with another woman are/would you (be able) to process that he's done that to essentially maintain what attracts you to him in the first place - or would you decide in your own RP framework to choose to spend your emotional fidelity somewhere else?

(Thanks for the response btw)

[–]TempestTcup11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

LOL, if he was going to go sleep with another woman then he wouldn't be my husband. Your woman acting badly isn't a free pass to have sex with someone else!

[–]Bakerofpie5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Whoa. Immediately made me think of Anchorman: "boy, that escalated quickly." Not a mod, but for most of us cheating is a deal breaker. If our SO's were going to get a little something on the side because I was an asshole during one argument, that isn't displaying his dominance. If he were doing it as some sort of punishment, that is crazy behavior, not the level-headed actions of a respectable alpha.

[–]RPW Mmargerym4 points5 points  (16 children) | Copy

This is a pretty extreme example. The short answer is he wouldn't just go out and sleep with some other woman if I was "acting out", he'd correct me head on.

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (15 children) | Copy

It is an extreme example. You had a fight - you come back and he says I slept with this girl last night (safely).

  • Two things.

  • You shortly after he says this realise that you were entirely wrong about the fight - how do you handle this situation now?

  • You shortly after he says this realise that you were entirely right and he was wrong - how do you handle this situation now?

[–]StingrayVC4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

I can tell you that for my husband, cheating is just not in the cards. Not because I would leave him (because he knows very well I wouldn't) but because cheating is something he would never do for himself. It would go against everything he stands for regardless of what my opinion is on the matter.

So, there really isn't any answering it. However, I can say that he would freeze me out (which is horrible). If I realize the fight was my fault, I tell him I was wrong and why, so he understands I'm not just sucking up.

If I'm right and he's wrong, I ask myself, why was he wrong? What didn't he see. Is he so stressed out right now that he couldn't think straight and did I push his buttons? Was what the fight about really worth pursuing or should I just let it go? If it is worth pursuing, I look for the right time and place to calmly bring it up again.

[–]RPW Mmargerym2 points3 points  (13 children) | Copy

This is impossible to answer because the entire premise is a false one.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

When has your other halves' behaviour become unacceptable and how did you resolve that?

Occam has never acted out of line or done anything to make me pause and question his behavior or actions.

So, let's pretend you were acting like a cunt and he stepped out (Soft nexted you).

Then we would no longer be together. Occam and I both have a strict No-Cheating policy. We only get one shot to make this work, so it's all or nothing as far as our relationship goes.

What if you thought you weren't acting like a cunt?

If I ever stepped out of line, Occam would tell me. If I disagreed, we would discuss the situation and my behavior. This has never happened however, so I'm just going off of how we would deal with anything else.

What if you were acting a cunt and you knew it?

I'm not really into the whole "playing games" thing. I've seen a lot of bad behavior from women over the years, so I probably have a shorter fuse when it comes to women acting out than Occam does.

[–]Endorsed ContributorOccamsUsername8 points9 points  (3 children) | Copy

I probably have a shorter fuse when it comes to women acting out than Occam does.

Confirmed. Phantom is ~0.1% more misogynistic than I am.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

HaH! I thought it was more. :0)

[–]Endorsed ContributorOccamsUsername7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy

Well, now that you've giving me lip like that, I'm suddenly 28.32% more misogynistic than you are.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (8 children) | Copy

Do you think you can maintain your own interests, your own identity, and your own self value while in a somewhat submissive role to a man in your life?

Sorry if that's aggressive, this all seems a little weird to me still. The idea of women saying that they want a man to provide and lead is a real new thing to hear.

I am also calling BS a little. One key tenet here is YAWALT, and it seems like you are the exception, just from reading. Do you really not flirt with other guys, not test the leadership ability of your men, and not buy into just about everyone else's feminist ideology? How do you respond without suggesting that NAWALT?

Thanks, been looking forward to this AMA

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

Do you really not flirt with other guys, not test the leadership ability of your men, and not buy into just about everyone else's feminist ideology? How do you respond without suggesting that NAWALT?

this is women in the state of nature, unswaddled by the frame of a dominant man. when a woman is in the thrall of a dominant man you wouldnt recognize her. when you see women acting like this they are frustrated and shit-testing the whole world. rpw women are MADE by their men's frames, not born, most of the time. this flows the other way as well--since most men are beta (not OMEGAS, which many confuse beta with), it is the woman who can bring out or squash the alpha traits in him. there is too much emphasis on words in this culture. we need more active molding of each other in relationships

Do you think you can maintain your own interests, your own identity, and your own self value while in a somewhat submissive role to a man in your life?

i am a realtor, i have about 67 hobbies my husband doesnt give a flying fuck about except for sleeping under or wearing the byproducts. i have an extremely strong identity, and personality, it just happens to MESH with his. we are complementary and compatible--he sees us as being like magneto and mystique or zod and ursa from superman 2. he doesnt want a doormat, he wants me to be his sidekick, but never to forget that HE'S the leader. submission in our context is so misuderstood. i prefer "deference" or "rank". i am a just a lower rank than him, not a groveling worm slave with no existence.

[–]RPW Mmargerym8 points9 points  (1 child) | Copy

Do you think you can maintain your own interests, your own identity, and your own self value while in a somewhat submissive role to a man in your life?

I don't think so, I live it. Think of it this way- it's really key. My husband married me for me. What would happen to our marriage if I lost me?

I am also calling BS a little. One key tenet here is YAWALT, and it seems like you are the exception, just from reading. Do you really not flirt with other guys, not test the leadership ability of your men, and not buy into just about everyone else's feminist ideology? How do you respond without suggesting that NAWALT?

We are not perfect. Speaking for myself here it's not about never ever doing these things and being absolutely perfect all the time. No, that sort of RPW does not exist. Being an RPW is about being aware of those things and making the active pain-in-the-ass choice not to devolve. It's constant work, a constant battle against what I call our inner shrews. But we do it. THAT is what sets us apart from other women- not that we aren't like them inherently but that we chose to change that every minute of the day.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks, lucky man. I'd imagine you have to be pretty content with who he is and what he does for a living

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

Being with Occam has allowed me to embrace and behave more like myself. I have some odd quirks, and I'm a goof. Around outsiders, I can be very quiet, and withdrawn, but my SO can't get me to shut-up. I don't filter my behavior, opinions, or thoughts. For me the reverse is true, it's hard to maintain my identity when I'm around other people (particularly if they have feminist inclinations). I seek peace and tranquility in social situations, so I will opt to remain quiet instead of voicing an opinion I know will be poorly received.

As for you calling BS, that's fine. All that matters to me is that Occam, my friends, and my family know the truth of my character.


[–]Endorsed ContributorOccamsUsername4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

my SO can't get me to shut-up

It can be a problem around bedtime, but I have a few methods to secure silence.

[–]RPW Mmargerym4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is a really good point; our men do not eclipse us they bring us out.

EDIT: I feel safe enough in my husband to be myself. It has made my confidence and understanding of myself grow, actually.

[–]TempestTcup2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

It's not that we are the exception, it's that we are aware of what is going on and what it leads to. Any other woman that finds us and follows us will be the same: aware of their actions and therefore able to stifle the worst of them.

You don't lose your identity, you are just doing your best to make your husband happy and letting a man lead makes most men happy. Plenty of us have our own careers and we are in charge of them, even SAHM run the home, so it's nice to come home and let the man run the show.

[–]KoelSchenken1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I still consider myself at an early stage of "digestisting" red pill, but i've been here long enough to understand the last sticky(before yours) on this subreddit should be respected more, that being said. My sister is probably a HB7-9, she's a year younger then i am(24) attending a bachlor degree and probably getting it. I've been able to see most of her relationships over the last few years. starting at 16 to were she is now. everything TRP says has been too true to the fucking letter.The assholes that woke me up with her screaming out of orgasm, and the blue pill beta shit that maybe had sex while i slept comfortably.

How do I make her more aware about the "attributes" she should look for in a man. How do i get rid of the guilt i feel toward in improving her? or how do i improve her as a person without making myself an ass. i'd write more but i could care less. This is holding me back more then it should, AWALT and all the shit i read here, but it's still my fucking sister and i'd appreciate your import.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (15 children) | Copy

I just wanted to say you ladies are awesome! My question is do you think women are finally turning their backs on feminism? Even though there are a ton of feminist clubs on campus, they just seem so desperate! It is so obvious feminism is a lie! Also are you ever tempted by feminist thought?

[–][deleted]  (2 children) | Copy


[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy

True...feminism has really corrupted everything for the last 150 years. Women were so much happier when they were angels of the hearth and not involved with masculine things such as politics, education and business

[–]RPW Mmargerym4 points5 points  (11 children) | Copy

I think it's happening. Is it taking over feminism? No, I think feminism is going to be here for a long while to come. But it's happening.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (10 children) | Copy

That's good...I am a Traditional woman's rights activist and hope one day things like Women's Sufferage will end!

[–]RPW Mmargerym2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy

Are you the owner of the blog?

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

No, but Secular Patriarchy is one of my favorite blogs. So may manosphere blogs are so politically correct to the point they never touch early feminists from the 19th century...these women were the poison that tainted the well! What do you think of his blog?

[–]RPW Mmargerym4 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy

I like it! I love the secular POV.

I find this blog to be fascinating. It sort of feels in the blanks you are talking about-

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

yeah the thing is those religious men? totally wrong about god(they didn't know any better) but really right about women! So you would be okay with getting rid of women's rights to vote and even own property? You are a really remarkable woman indeed!

[–]RPW Mmargerym2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

I didn't say that. :) But I am not a fan of democracy to begin with. My views aren't against women they are against the whole institution.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Well as long as you hate democracy then you are fine...I am not really against women either. Like children they have been lead astray...back in the 1800s women were happy when they were wives who stayed in the private sphere

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

i would also advocate the end of women's suffrage, along with that of most other people's

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

agreed...only white men who own property or are in the military should be able to vote

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

hear, hear--in the modern context id replace property ownership with some sort of net taxpayer scheme TBD

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Men like to give females a 'number' for attractiveness (appearance). If you would give yourself an honest guess, what would your number be?

[–]PenguinLovr2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy


[–]RPW ECFleetingWish1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy


[–]Almondbiscotti-1 points0 points  (36 children) | Copy

Serious question- I've been reading RPW for awhile, don't participate much bc it seems if you disagree with someone you ban them. What gives? Why the temper?

[–]RPW Mmargerym6 points7 points  (11 children) | Copy

We get a ton of trolls all the time. It's not a matter of disagreement we also look into their posting history and will talk with them (though not always). 90% of the people that come in are there to "save us from ourselves". We're trying to maintain a space where women can focus on self-improvement not constantly have to fight with everyone and their aunt about the merit of what we are or aren't doing.

[–]Almondbiscotti4 points5 points  (9 children) | Copy

I witnessed one post the other day....where the woman was being respectful but you all had no tolerance for her view point, which was RP . I don't want to talk about the thread but she was ban. I did not view her as a troll. I do think you ladies might benefit with a bit of tolerance. :) I do enjoy the sub but am reluctant to participate. I am RP but don't feel respected. Appreciate the floor.

[–]RPW Mmargerym6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Feel free to PM me a link to the user/conversation so I can figure out what you are talking about. I don't want to derail this thread, though.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

Without knowing what you are talking about specifically, I can't adequately provide a response. Context is important.

As far as tolerance goes, we are wary of brand new submitters with limited posting histories. We deal with a lot of trolls pretending to be sincere and interested, only to have the conversations derailed. Keep in mind that because you're not a mod, there may have been comments the user made that were deleted (so you wouldn't have seen them).

[–]Almondbiscotti-1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy

I am very interested in gender issues but don't understand all the mod procedures.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

What gender issues specifically?

[–]PenguinLovr1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

I missed out on that thread, but there have been plenty where the mods were too tolerant and found a troll on their hands at some point.

It's one thing to disagree, and it's another thing to become argumentative, and question the stance RPW take, or try to overly explain your own stance when it doesn't have really a place at RPW.

What about RPW does not make you feel respected?

[–]Almondbiscotti-2 points-1 points  (3 children) | Copy

The gang up mentality, I feel like it's happening now, with a mere question. The proof will be in how the sub moves forward. I appreciate your time.

[–]MSoftHarem[M] 4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

You're treading dangerously close to concern trolling on a 4 day old account. You're not going to have to worry about what the lady mods do because if you continue along this line of reasoning you're gone.

[–]Nemester2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thumbs up.

[–]PenguinLovr4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

To be honest, I asked Almond a question and she answered HONESTLY, but at the same time, she is getting offended by not hearing what she wants to hear, which is something we can't do anything about.

[–]PenguinLovr5 points6 points  (22 children) | Copy

It seems like if you are trolling, or concern trolling, you are breaking the rules. It's not if they disagree, boom, you're banned. Just don't break the rules.

[–]eatplaycrush4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

This. I've seen many posts from females who openly admit they are not 100% RPW and from ladies who aren't RPW at all. If they are nice and not out to "shame" what that sub was created for then there really isn't an issue that I've seen, honestly.

[–]RPW Mmargerym2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I don't have an issue with this, either. But if they are a repeat offender with "Well, I am sort of RP buuuut...." it quickly turns into how they aren't RP and how we should adopt that, too.

[–]Almondbiscotti-3 points-2 points  (19 children) | Copy

There seems to be a ganging up ....on that sub. Just say'in. It would be nice to show more respect to one another. That's all. Have a nice day.

[–]TempestTcup8 points9 points  (9 children) | Copy

We have to be tough and proactive to keep the sub on point. We have a ton of trolls, so basically if it looks like a nail it gets the ban hammer. We have other things to do, we don't have all day to ponder on trollishness.

[–]Almondbiscotti-5 points-4 points  (8 children) | Copy

Again, a little tolerance is appreciated, for other view points.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (7 children) | Copy

I think it's a close knit community, and newcomers need to "pay their dues" to an extent. If you have no history posting on either TRP or the RPW sub, but you come in attacking a well-established member, then your comments won't be well received. That said, I'm not sure exactly what situation you're talking about, so it's difficult to provide more feedback.

I don't think of the RPW sub as intolerant, but rather focused. We try to weed out comments that derail or muddy up the conversations, we don't allow bad advice or input to go unchallenged. We won't learn how to be better women if we aren't willing to dole out some tough-love.

[–]Almondbiscotti-4 points-3 points  (6 children) | Copy

I haven't seen posters attack.....just banned.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (4 children) | Copy

Again, specific information would be useful. We get a lot of "empty" accounts suddenly popping up and asking loaded questions. Some people just prove themselves "guilty" faster than others.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

who exactly have you seen banned, specifically

[–]PenguinLovr5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

I feel like that aspect is part of the RPW "hazing" stage - when you're new, its very likely as a woman, you have been used to hearing platitudes and praise and validation your whole life, and stepping into RPW is a different sort of world, where things aren't all pretty and amazing all the time. Women there tend not to sugarcoat their answers, and even when I've tried to be nice and respectful to new users, I get a little slack for giving non RPW advice. In a sense, the women there aren't going to nurture and coddle women the same way society does.

[–]TempestTcup3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

It's not temper - we simply do not have the time to mess with people that are either trolling or are not RP.

[–]KoelSchenken0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

my sister's a bh7-9, she's not "that promiscuous", but well, she probably is to other readers here. How do i improve her lifestyle in choosing men without making myself an asshole?

[–][deleted]  (2 children) | Copy


[–]RPW Mmargerym3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Personally, I don't like the smell of burning human flesh.

[–]PenguinLovr0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I feel like there would be more trolling though.

[–]PenguinLovr0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

So I know I'm NOT A MOD but I've been following RP. I am not 100% RPW and also very honest about where I don't agree, but I tried my best to take an RPW stance on all of my replies so if something is not exactly RP feel free to call me out. I've been called a good RPW "ambassador" as dana has put it, but there's still more for me to learn.

[–]totorox0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

WTF are you doing is this wretched hive of scum and villainy ? Why did you betray your sisters and mothers ? What about your daughters, why do you want them to be slaves to the patriarchy ?

K sarcasm aside, how are you dealing with the backlash you're getting from feminists on reddit, and what blacklash are you getting ? I wouldnt want to be in your shoes.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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