I literally just came from seeing an escort. This was the third time I've had sex, I'm 26. Twice with her in January and once now.

Every single time was so horrendously shit. I came in her but Jesus I just have no ability to do anything near the type of stuff I've read about on here and in my whole life.

Just slipping out constantly, not getting hard properly, doubting myself, seeing zero reaction from her, unable to keep any sort of rhythm, pathetic 'pounding', unable to physically move her at all.

I just don't know what to do really. Do I just write sex off as something I'll never really be able to perform at?

I have this fantasy where in 5 years or so I've been at my career for a few years, making ok money and living independently, finding some post wall woman who's ridden the CC and obviously needs a provider and in exchange she'll be willing to teach me to have sex properly. But after being on TRP even that seems impossible.

Ive always had anxiety going further with girls I've met in real life due to being so inexperienced. From my appearance I look like a tough motherfucker and that's the type of vibe I put out, I can never match this expectation so I just never get anywhere.

Not sure what to do anymore. I always thought "at least I can see escorts if I never make it with an actual girl." But I don't even see the appeal anymore. Sex is shit.