I've finally gotten the chance to start my life. Living and working on my own in a new city. Working on myself and my boundaries and self esteem. Have a long history of low self esteem.

Recently pretty much all my old friends and family have had a fight or disagreement with me about something and we've ended up cutting ties. Nearly everyone in my life pretty much.

I've been described as "rigid and uncompromising", "selfish", "stupid", "arrogant" and some have silently cut me off via proxy to hold allegiance to friends who are logistically going to offer them more than I can. I'm none of those things but still think my boundaries are lax as fuck. The family I have left are still shaming me to be more of a doormat like I used to be or covertly threaten to cut contact. I'm not scared but sad.

How normal is this. Is this something I should be overcoming through game/charm? I haven't made any friends in my new city yet and it's been 6 months now but I haven't really had a strong chance yet due to work and other commitments. I have work friends but that's it. I don't really get on with fake people and it's just a struggle to meet up with people I know unless there's strong plans going on as the friendships aren't that strong and everyone is busy.

Is going completely solo a common experience? Any advice on breaking through this? Cheers