First I'd like to explain what happened. This was 7-6 months ago. A girl I wasn't specifically interested in liked me a lot. After the first 'date', which was in public (yes it matters), I started liking her a lot but also started questioning if I should continue as many people I know were giving me doubts. After the second date, Netflix & Chill at her home, I escalated to cuddling (oh god I'm awful, I know this is bad) and called it a day.

I'm a lot different in school than outside of it, because my friend group doesn't include students on my school anymore and I've known many of my classmates since primary school, where I was bullied quite a lot for unimportant reasons. Her brother is a classmate too (this was one of my 'doubts' at first, I learned this later) and started to interfere. After a whole week of listening to people's bullshit while also starting to doubt myself, I had a third netflix & chill date. I did nothing. After that she cut contact and it was done.

Recently, my friend has become good friends with her and texted me that they chat about me for a while. She said that she wasn't sure if I liked her (honestly this part is kinda weird) and that I didn't take enough initiative. I was pretty tipsy when I got the message and felt bad, pretty much awful, because it reminded me of her.

But this is not a oneitis post.

Seems unbelievable, but I'll explain. Because classmates keep 'bullying' me with it and now my friend has contact with her, I keep getting reminded of my failure. I'm ashamed of it. I don't necessarily want her, nor do I think I can ever get back to her. I put her behind me but I can't get rid of her (okay this sounds very harsh but I don't mean it like that, I just don't want to have to deal with her anymore). And for me, that is a problem.

This is the problem: ever since I failed with her I haven't had a girl anywhere. The only progress I had made was with an HB2 when I was pretty drunk, who I immediately broke contact with, and a few girls with carnival who all turned out to have a boyfriend (and that is not a problem, unless the day after they're kissing for hours in front of you). I can't seem to get any girl, and I've realised the little confidence I had was gone so I started lifting more. It was getting better and better but, as said, now I'm being confronted with that bullshit again, this time on a whole different level. The worst is, my friend is sending me screenshots of what she says about me and it seems like I still do have a chance. Watch a girl's actions, not her words. Still, it gives me some false hope. But that hope increased when I tried again in a club (I was dumb to give it another shot) but she didn't want it, but as if nothing happened she came up to me last time in the same club because she was happy to see me. Of course I thought maybe if I could get her, my problems would be fixed. But I should fucking stop thinking that and find a different solution.

How do I fix this?

TL;DR I don't want to be reminded of my awful failure with a girl I was dating but I can't stop it from happening due to circumstances. It destroyed my self confidence at the time and I haven't had a girl for months. Tried lifting more, didn't work, recent events made it a bit worse. How do I fix this?