If you are going to grow as a Man, you must know that your undertaking will be long and difficult, marked with failure and most people in your life will tell you to just throw in the towel. Why? Because THEY threw in the towel. Fuck them. Make them rue the day they underestimated you.
Backstory: I am 32, single with no kids and currently weigh 275 lbs. I found out my wife was done with me in late May 2014. When I found out she was leaving, I weighed 315. So I have lost 40 pounds since then and will never stop working toward a better, healthier body. I look great, I feel amazing and most importantly I am MOVING FORWARD instead of standing still. ALWAYS BE PUSHING.
The following is a list of things I am doing daily to follow the red pill literature and also a list of things I am AVOIDING to help me accomplish my goals.
What I do:
- Exercise AT LEAST once a day, twice is the goal. That might sound like madness to some new red pill acolytes, but try it before you knock it. I am not saying act like Rocky training for his fight with Drago. I ride my bike when I wake up for 3 miles, trying to do the whole circuit in under 15 minutes (or 4 songs). I also go to the gym each night and do 20 minutes of intense treadmill, 15 minutes of intense stairmaster and either the bike or extra treadmill until I hit 45 minutes. If you aren’t uncomfortable and sweating, you are doing it wrong. If you are seriously out of shape and need to walk real slow at first to get yourself going, fine do it. But remember the goal: Heavy breathing and sweat all the time. Otherwise you really aint doing shit. Just started weight training, and I am gonna go slow since I care more about weight loss than muscle growth currently. But trust, it is heavy in my future plans.
- Read every day. Last week I read Bang by Roosh. Right now I am reading the 48 laws of Power by Robert Greene. Great book so far that I highly recommend. I have Mystery Method on my desk as my next book and I just ordered The Art of Seduction by Mr. Greene, The Rational Male by Rollo Tomassi (this guy knows his shit), and Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman. The purpose of the Emotional Intelligence book is solely to work on my emotional poker face and master my ability to be a goddamn Oak tree in the face of a women’s shit tests and melt downs. I recommend reading for at least an hour a day. It truly can help with women too, as you always have fodder for small talk (hat tip to Roosh for this one; check out his book reviews section).
- Practice your hobby/passion at least 2-3 times a week. I am a bass player and this means I have value that I can demonstrate to others via performance. Practicing and learning new techniques, scales, chords, etc. is helping me grow. It also keeps me busy so when bitches hit me up, I am not “available.” Remember, you don’t want to be available all the time to a women, it signals you have nothing going on and therefore will invest an inordinate amount of time and energy into your relationship (gag). Instead, “make your mission your priority” (see the 16 commandments of Poon by Roissy for more details). If you are student, hit the books or go meet people in your field. If you don’t have any hobbies, I don’t have any sympathy for you because that means you are one of the boring Betas who make my job easier :) Every man is interested in something – dive head in, get your hands dirty and create meaning in your life. I know my office job certainly isn’t leaving me filling fulfilled. It’s just a paycheck. To a women, that means I am passion-less office drone. So surprise yourself and get heavy into what you love. People will notice.
- Take your appearance seriously. Brush your teeth daily, get a nice haircut every other week, get some new clothes every 3-4 months. Money is not an excuse man. I live in LA and I see broke ass kids all the time looking fresh to death. If it’s important to you, you will make it a priority. And women will see it. You don’t need a new wardrobe over night or an extreme make over. You are a Man who is finding himself and learning his tastes. Find Men around you that you respect, that you see are successful with women and study them. You will notice they wear a time piece; their skin isn’t as greasy as rest of the guys in the office. Their clothes seems to fit them in a way yours don’t -nothing is too tight or too baggy. Their body language communicates they are comfortable and relaxed no matter where he is. Keep studying. Notice that their effortless banter with waitresses and secretaries is made easier by fresh breath and the fact that there isn’t moss growing on his teeth. He packs his lunch with proteins and veggies or makes healthy choices and doesn’t get Wendy’s 3 times a week. Bitches notice this. He washes his car on the reg, no matter how big a piece of shit hoopty it is. Remember the Frame: I am the Prince. Well, if you were really a real prince, you would LOOK like a prince.
- Have fun, everywhere. Be the party. Make a boring night more interesting. People love it when someone has the balls to push a rudderless ship in ANY direction. At least you tried! Why be miserable because you are in traffic or waiting in line at the market? Strike up a conversation and get laughing. Keep your fucking phone in your pocket. No one appreciates another Beta retreating to the comfort of his smart phone instead of acting. No one remembers the “really cute guy with his shoulders slumped and his face staring at his phone.” Everyone remembers the charismatic guy who made the usually boring time at the laundry mat go by really fast.
- Approach strangers if they interest you. Man or woman. I walked up to a 90 year old man at the market on Sunday and started talking to him about his baseball cap; I bought the same type of hat for my gramps because my gramps was at pearl harbor on a battleship and is proud as fuck. So I got him a hat with his ship name and number a few Christmases’ ago. The old guy in the market, whose name is Art by the way, was genuinely happy I stopped to talk to him and guess what? Mad bitches watching me, wondering why a hot young guy in gym clothes is shooting the shit with an old man in the middle of a grocery store on Sunday morning.
- Make empowering music mixes to work out to and to listen to on the way to work and when going out. This is no joke. This shit works. I can literally feel the “power” - the undulating waves of Alpha when I hear certain parts of certain songs. It can also have a useful kinetic-like effect in that the same mix I play when going out or working out is the same mix I fuck chicks to and the same mix I listen to on the way home after fucking a bitch. It internalizes the music and ties it to the powerful feelings you have after you just destroyed some chick and left her weak in the knees. The next time that song comes on, you will get a boner or be transported back to that moment of victory. Try it. I will be making some posts with the music I have been using lately. So useful.
What I don’t do:
Number 1- I don’t watch TV. TV is bad for multiple reasons, red pill-wise. It is filled with shows and advertising that subliminally reinforces the status quo of feminist primacy by displaying bumbling idiot dads being cowed by their bitchy, controlling wives and bratty fuck face kids. I know I’m not the first to notice or comment on this but it is a real problem because it makes you comfortable with those archetypes because you see them so often. Don’t get comfortable. Always challenge yourself and the ideas that you are presented with as “truth”. Have a natural curiosity about people and the world; it will help you immensely. TV is also is filled with ads for delicious and tempting new fat guy foods like Bacon stuffed pizza and pretzel burgers. So it will tempt you when what you really need is a mindset of SACRIFICE, not COMFORT. Lastly, TV is filled with sneering Irony, mocks sincerity, and allows us to live a hermetic existence by watching others live interesting lives but not compelling us to turn off the TV and GO LIVE an interesting life. Go read David Foster Wallace’s essay “E Unibus Pluram: Television and U.S. Fiction” (takes 2 seconds to google) for an amazing analysis of how irony became entrenched in television and U.S. pop culture, turning sincerity into a joke. The article also discusses the voyeuristic qualities of TV watching and how that allows us to escape from ever having to experience some of the most rewarding parts of being a Human. Here is a great quote:
If it’s true that many Americans are lonely, and if it’s true that many lonely people find in television’s 2D images relief from the pain of their reluctance to be around real humans, then it’s also obvious that the more time spent watching TV, the less time spent in the real human world, the harder it becomes to not feel alienated from real humans, solipsistic, lonely. – David Foster Wallace
Number 2 - I don’t play video games. I was a pretty big gamer for a while there (40K+ Gamerscore on xbox) but guess what? When I met my ex-wife in college at age 22 and was super alpha, I hadn’t playing video games since I was 15. Too busy partying. But once I moved in with my girl, I got the Halo 3 edition console and was a permanent couch potato up until about six months ago. Combine that with shitty eating habits, no exercise and an office job and you have a recipe for Beta Bitch tits.
Number 3 - I don’t care about food. Put another way, I reframed by view of food from a pleasure/reward vantage to a fuel only vantage. How did I accomplish this? I took a moment and did some soul searching. I noticed that I am an emotional eater and that when I am stressed out I binge on certain really bad foods, like pizza and ice cream. I would start to eat badly and that would turn into eating badly for a whole weekend, then a whole week. Eating fast food literally makes me sick now. I ate some greasy ass pizza hut pizza last weekend (2 slices!) and it ruined my Saturday night. It was like putting peanut butter in a gas tank. I felt thick, lethargic, couldn’t concentrate and all I wanted to do was take a nap. That is what the old Lazarus would have done, taken a nap after eating 5-6 slices of pizza. Disgusting. Now food has a whole different meaning since I started exercising and eating right. My entire attitude has changed. Exercising first thing in the morning and putting on positive Male music gets my day started right. A healthy breakfast fuels me until my lunch salad. Once I go to the gym again at night, I feel like I could conquer the world. Try it; it’s crazy what endorphins and testosterone combined with a non-shitty diet will do for your mental state. You will think clearly, act quickly and be ready to take all comers.