How do I 'spin plates' in an LTR without fucking them?

seever · 2014-06-21T05:00:01+00:00

You already have these girls in your social circle, so that's good. Hang out with them in group settings so you can talk them up and get to know them without it being weird. If you have the chance to get their numbers, take it. (And if your girlfriend gets jealous, remind her that you're not cheating, they're literally just friends).

From then on, just maintain semi-regular contact. Texting is an easy way to keep it going, combined with the face-to-face contact in your social groups.

The overall point is, you want to be interesting to them while making it clear that you're not their "best friend" and you're not available for dating, either. Use TRP tactics when hanging out in groups like this guy.

Finally, as far as your gf goes, you can't stop her from having guy friends. That's her choice. But there's no way to tell if she'll react that way, so deal with that when/if it comes up.

W_O_M_B_A_T · 2014-06-22T02:59:55+00:00

without giving her an excuse to make hang out with new guy friends.

She does that already and lies about it. Nothing you can really do to stop it. Women are rarely emotionally faithful, because they're addicted to validation and "narcissistic supply."

(Also if you point this out to her, she'll unleash every ounce of bottled up shame and guilt she feels about her behavior, and project it all onto you. Expect death threats.)

If you were to break up with her she could easily have a rebound over to fuck her in 12-24 hours. this is why spinning plates and being prepared to walk out if necessary is so important. This is why one-its and giving too many fucks is always a recipe for disaster.

The only solution is to make your validation and narcissistic supply more expensive, much harder for her to to get, more potent, and not reliable.

maivry · 2014-06-21T19:12:27+00:00

Why are you even in an LTR? You clearly don't care about her. Just dump her and spin plates. Would it be acceptable for her to maintain contact with guys that would fuck her at the drop of a hat? Of course not. Why not live up to the standards you hold for other people?

[deleted] · 2014-06-21T12:05:09+00:00

Short answer,I don't think it's possible, either you give them the alpha D or the beta attention, something need to keep your more than a colleague. I don't really get why you would bother?

Why just not leave?

Why is it important to "have prepared" something, I mean, if you already know your targets why not just approach them after you break up with your current girl without any previous prep work?(don't even tell them you broke up, it make things more fun)

But you know your shit better and I don't really care. I would play the "unhappy marriage" card. It's relatively blue pill because you basically flaunt RMV and let their ovaries make the bad calls instead of their vagina. This does take some time to warm them up, but it does last longer and considering how indecisive you are that should be your main focus.

Meglomaniac · 2014-06-21T04:21:05+00:00

Having multiple girls is not about cheating on a girl.

Its about establishing the fact that you are non monogamous immediately, women dont understand that the first step in non monogamy not monogamy. She needs to earn that.

If she asks if you are fucking other girls say "yes". If she asks why "I like variety". Ignore her other questions. If she gets mad, next her.

Title	How do I 'spin plates' in an LTR without fucking them?
Author	aguy01
Upvotes	5
Comments	12
Date	June 21, 2014 3:28 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/28p3yc/how_do_i_spin_plates_in_an_ltr_without_fucking/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-do-i-spin-plates-in-an-ltr-without-fucking.140387 https://theredarchive.com/post/140387