When a guy is in my room, more often that not we already have a plan of what we're gonna do.
But when a guy is in my room, not necessarily for sex - we just worked on something or caught up after a while - sometimes they signal they wanna throw down.
There are attractive ways to do this, and there are unattractive ones.
One I have been getting from guys who aren't passive types when they're with me is lying with their back on my bed, EYES CLOSED, and going "ahhhh."
One guy even escalated this by nuzzling their head on my pillow.
It's not not-understandable -- initiating sex and getting an IOI are anxiety-provoking, especially when you're the one wanting a little stronger.
But what the guys had in common was that in the past they had the perfect opportunity to sleep with me -- playfully carrying me across a dance floor, or even having a kiss -- but they thought against it.
Certainly they may have had second thoughts at the time because they were wanting less than they had felt I was wanting, and sensing someone wants you more than you want them will often trigger caution. But maybe they had a moment of self doubt despite the game hanging in front of them.
Above all things, acting like a bitch when you're trying to signal you want to take a guy to town as the dominant one is like waving a pink hanky to get an army recruiter's attention as a worthy candidate.
The bed-pillow guy got in the habit of wearing tank tops whenever we hung out to 'get me interested,' or remind me that he has some muscle mass. That's very feminine behavior, because he is making it so he is the object and I am the subject/judger in that situation.
If I had walked into his world and he was in the middle of something, on his mission, and he was wearing what's best for his job, that's another scenario entirely. The bottom is left wanting to get a piece of that mission in his pants, preferably the backseat.
Maybe it's hotter to visit a bottom on platonic circumstances who dresses up (down) for you. That's a feminine receptacle saying, "hey, care to show me how you do what you do? You can use me if you want, that's cool." Completely different with a top relaying the same message to a bottom.
Guys, top or bottom, we have to stop signaling not even need, but any kind of I am doing this action to get you to like me, or even vibes of not having the other person.
People don't want to give you something you don't have; they want to give you something you already DO have. "I make millions of dollars successfully managing people's money; care to join the cow pile?" Yes please! "You can tell I have guys hang off of me." Yes; if there's any possibility I could join I'd appreciate it.
One of the highest-stakes sexual situations I was in was at a gay club where I thought I lost something (I forget what). A fairly muscular handsome older guy who does security comes to me, not much taller than me, and dictates some important info to me with his eyes off to the side, where I guess people look when they're relaying something important from memory. I told him thanks and admitted I was attracted to him. He grabbed me playfully as he responded, and I came back to the same club the next night to go somewhere secret he knew at his workplace so I could blow him.
Stay on your missions!