For example, being told by female relatives all you have to do to to find a mate is "be nice and respectful" and that kind of stuff. I can't help but feel like this is something TRP has right, but I'm looking to be convinced otherwise.

People in general will give you phony compliments and false reassurance, so why is it not true in this circumstance?

Or is it good advice but men misconstrue what it means to be "nice and respectful"?