If you live in an sort of multi cultural part of the world, you'll appreciate that the folks you bump into daily have different beliefs. They have their special days; Ramadhan, Diwali, Pesach, whatever.

Would you ever, for a moment, attempt to convince someone of Muslim belief to stop observing Ramadhan? Of course not. It's their day (or, if you're Muslim, your day). Far be it for me to tell you how to go about your days with your beliefs.

I was wandering through some boxes in our storage unit and came across a Valentine's card I gave my wife a few years ago. This was a couple of months ago. It hit me, right there and then. I don't believe in Valentine's Day but she does. Rather than work on convincing her that it's a misplaced belief or trying to participate in a level that is so far beyond what I rationally believe (huge array of gifts and over the top gestures ie. Covert Contracts everywhere), I tried something different this year. I went along with it.

What does that mean? I dropped off some simple flowers and a card saying "Happy Valentine's Day, I love you" while running errands. She was out at the time, came home and seemed to appreciate them. I have no idea if she was thrilled, disappointed or indifferent. It's her day, not mine. Just like saying "I wish you a joyous Diwalhi" to a Hindu guy I work with, it's not about changing beliefs or trying to participate fully. It's just acknowledging some day she believes in is happening. Casual observation.

Let me tell you, for the first time in 20 years, it was a perfect Valentine's evening. No pressure, no disappointment. Great sex, great food and such an air of relaxation.

So as you prepare your posts today denouncing Valentine's Day, give your approach some thought. Is it really worth it to make the point you're trying make? Is the disappointment from an unfilled covert contract worth the effort? We both know the answer is no. Let them have their day. Consider it a great training day for you and your new mental outlook on the home. A chance to happily wander up to the ship's wheel and navigate calmly.