Stupid mistakes. Rookie mistakes.

Maybe this is just a “word to the wise, don’t make this mistake” post.

43yo lifting , 15% bf. 6’2” 200#

Man I goofed up. In an earnest manner that if felt was of the best intents. I fucked up.

I shared in an email to my wife my thoughts on our marriage situation. This was not emotional or feeling based email, but a document of why I am taking my own path forward.

Not embarrassed of it nor ashamed, it was an honest attempt to state clearly a small set of things I believe would be excellent actions towards staying married. It was me trying be fair and say, “Here we are so near the end for these reasons. If we want to try to fix this here are 5 things I will need to see happen.” One of them was fuck me or fuck you. But put very pragmatically. I thought this was the fair thing to do. To put it clearly in front of my spouse, how we can strive to stay together. Stupid.

So I learn from my closest friend that wife shared the email with several of her girlfriends. My friend’s wife is friends with my wife and he would have not and has never gotten involved in this and he would never want to. But this time he did. He told me and he did this at great risk to his own self. I am not mad. I am only wondering why she decided to share it. It was the last of the trust in our relationship, now spent. Seems a stupid thing to do for a woman who has no job and no prospects outside this tenuous marriage. Her choice. Huh...

Anyhow I fucked up. I learned a few things. My friends think I should move on now (20+years married) and they are telling it to me straight (now). This weeks agenda: lawyer up. Hit gym. Stfu. Read.