709,179 posts

Wife can’t understand the way I’m acting

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October 6, 2018
9 upvotes

Stfu. Withdrawing attention. AA. AM. Looking my best every time I leave the house and most of all. NGAF.

The shit test have been flying. And I have been dodging them like I’m muhamid Ali.

I am aware of the 1000 foot rope. But I’m sure I’m Moving a little faster than I should be so she’s starting to ask me. Why I’m being an asshole. Which comes when I use AM. I’m literally having fun and laughing and she’s flipping out. So I just smack her ass and go do something else. It has 100% worked and defused a lot of situations recently. That normally would end in a frame loss or go a different way. So I’m moving forward with this. But there’s still an angry wife at times. I just have reached a point where I don’t care if she’s pissed off.

She will text me. Asking why I have to ruin her day. But in reality. I’m just not caring about her shit anymore. She’s telling me relationships shouldn’t be like this. We don’t talk things out anymore. I’m an asshole. On and on. She’s a control freak and I realize she is probably starting to feel a loss of control and trying to manipulate me in order to gain some back.

I work 10 hours a day. I come home cleaned the dog shit from the back yard. Showered and went to the gym. I get home and she’s asking me to do something. I just ignored it. She was off all day long. She works 3 days or less a week. Yes she does a lot of the house work but she has way more time.

She said how she did all this stuff today so I made a joke and said. You moved 3 boxes and cleaned a half of bathroom (she only cleaned her side. Which idc I can clean my own)

She said yea right. I poked more and she flipped out said I was a spoiled asshole who doesn’t appreciate anything she does.

I laugh and tell her I appreciate everything. And smacked her ass. I could tell the mood was going to continue so I went into the jacuzzi and read. She text me saying all this crazy shit. I didn’t answer. I’m literally a room over. It’s literally just a playful joke and she’s bugging out over it.

She’s on the rag so I realize this is def contributing to it. But is there ever a moment I should tell her why. Or do I constantly leave her in the dark till she just accept this is how it is. Or realizes her bad behavior is what causes this? I feel like she knows something is going on but lost as shit as to why it is.

We don’t see each other too much. And when we do she’s mad about something. Sometimes I snap her out of it. Sometimes I don’t have the energy to care enough so I do something else. She goes to be early and I know feels alone. So I do get conflicted still.

Will she adjust in time or should I give her a little guidance as to why this all is happening?

Edit: it’s also worth noting I have really been trying to add more fun into the relationship. So don’t get me wrong it’s not only shit test and bad behavior. We been having our fun. But the bad behavior is quit annoying and frequent. I have women begging me to sleep with them. And a wife who annoys me bc there’s a spoon out of place in the cabinet. It’s an interesting road.


Post Information
Title Wife can’t understand the way I’m acting
Author InconspicuousWand
Upvotes 9
Comments 51
Date 06 October 2018 05:36 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/203933
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/9ltmx8/wife_cant_understand_the_way_im_acting/
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Comments

[–]simbarlionRed Beret15 points16 points  (6 children) | Copy

It's not a game man. She's not a computer, with you trying to push the right buttons. Get your human on. If nothing else try to be a bit more passive. I would AM no more than 1 time per day, but when I do it comes out naturally, and works.

Even if you can pull 3 chicks right now, you're just going fuck that up to. Wife is your practice. Keep practicing.

It's dudes like you that wind up in 1 year divorced blaming mrp/trp.

[–]InconspicuousWand[S] 5 points6 points  (5 children) | Copy

She’s just a cunt dude.

I literally have tried everything to change this. For her. And then I realize. Fuck her. I need to do this for me. So I just don’t care. I’d love to make it work but I literally don’t like being around her anymore. My favorite days are when she’s at work

[–]SuperCrazy076 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

My favorite days are when she’s at work

I hear ya. I don’t think my wife is as bad as yours, but I get what your saying.

She recently went on a vacation for over a week and while most dudes here would be thinking omg, what if she cheats, I had the best time.

[–]Rian_StoneMod / Red Beret4 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy

deleted What is this?

[–]InconspicuousWand[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

I’m realizing that. And I just. Don’t. Fucking. Want to.

Is it because I have fucked my life upside and am slowly picking up the pieces? I’m not sure. I’m sticking it out until I figure that out.

But I’m telling you bro. I make plans for us and I’d rather do them alone most of the time. Just miserable for no reason it’s like she looks for it. Because she wants everything done her way. And when she doesn’t get it. She literally acts like a child.

I just don’t want to deal with it. I have so much on my plate getting where I need to be. I don’t have time to deal with a grown child. I would have children if I wanted that right now. I’m sure I can be doing 10000 things better. But I just don’t care enough.

[–]Rian_StoneMod / Red Beret2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

deleted What is this?

[–]InconspicuousWand[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

That’s where I’m at right now. Figuring it out.

I’ve lived my whole life as a drug addict who literally just zombied through life without thought. Planning. Or thinking.

So I’m trying to go deep as fuck and figure my shit out. I love coming here and you guys ask me shit that makes me think about “why the fuck am I doing this?” Etc. I appreciate that

[–]BobbyPeruRed Beret7 points8 points  (9 children) | Copy

Covert contracts, passive aggressive, bad timing on ass smacks...

Dude, add a little common sense into your routine. You’re a kid with dynamite- you have all these tools and tricks, but you don’t know when and how to use them, so you’re blowing shit up. You say you’re passing shit tests, but you failed the fuck out of the ones you described above.

STFU. A. Lot. More.

[–]InconspicuousWand[S] 2 points3 points  (7 children) | Copy

I get what you’re saying but I also reached a point where I don’t care enough. I just don’t care. I really don’t even like being around her anymore bc she’s just not fun to be around for the majority of the time. So if she’s not going to be fun.

I am. Because she has been sucking the fun from me for a while and I’m trying to gain it back. Starting with myself. I’m at a point where I’d rather just be myself and live how I want and her either fall into place or Leave. I literally have 3 other women who are begging to fuck me. Who are probably fun as shit. And I have to say no to them and deal with miserable. It really causes ya to not give a fuck.

If you been eating choc pudding for 5 years everyday and it’s getting grosser the more you eat it. And 3 people come with steaks. Ice cream. Cake. Wearing party hats. And you have to say no and eat the fucking pudding. It turns you into a different animal

But I would like to understand where you think I went wrong above

[–]gettingmymojobackRed Beret7 points8 points  (6 children) | Copy

Her behaviours are a reflection of you.

If she’s no fun, then you’re likely overestimating your own fun level.

Or she’s just a harpy cunt. Less likely, given the information you’ve provided thus far.

If you actually do all the work without skipping any steps, you’ll get a concrete answer on which situation you’re in.

Or just skip ahead to the end, divorce the wife, fuck the other 3 chicks and be right back where you started wondering why your LTR sucks and is a harpy cunt.

[–]SteelSharpensSteelMod / Red Beret7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

Or just skip ahead to the end, divorce the wife, fuck the other 3 chicks and be right back where you started wondering why your LTR sucks and is a harpy cunt.

Story of Steve RIGHT HERE.

[–]InconspicuousWand[S] 1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

I’m fun man.

She’s a harpy cunt.

I hate being around her

[–]gettingmymojobackRed Beret1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

I can’t prove you’re not, but I’d be more inclined to believe you if you had a single OYS post to your credit.

[–]InconspicuousWand[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

I do

[–]gettingmymojobackRed Beret1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Typo: more than a single

[–]InconspicuousWand[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Got you. I will be posting more

[–]runnowxxx0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I agree. OP is like a text book bluepill.

[–]officerkondo6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy

Do you even like this woman? It sounds like you just troll her every moment of the day.

[–]InconspicuousWand[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I used to love this girl so much. Now I don’t really want to be around her. Ive been trying. I really have. But It’s like nails on a chalkboard.

It’s constantly bitching. So I just treat her the like oldest teen in the room. This is how I been keeping my sanity.

[–]lifeadept0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

like and love is not the same ... Athol makes this distinction quite clear. I wouldn't want to be with someone I don't like.

[–]SteelSharpensSteelMod / Red Beret7 points8 points  (7 children) | Copy

You have a tougher road to go given your history of cheating and heroin.

You don't get extra points for turning your life around.

[–]470_2_700_nm2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Dammit that guy can write. Did jack10 alpha widow the lot of us?

[–]InconspicuousWand[S] 0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

That guy was a genius.

I guess I realize I have a way tougher road and I think (a lot actually) given such a fuck up of my past and the results of her behavior because of my actions.

Maybe it’s just best to leave. Get my shit together. And move on.

[–]SteelSharpensSteelMod / Red Beret2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

Get your shit together first. Get in a good headspace to make good decisions. You're not in a good headspace yet.

[–]InconspicuousWand[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

You’re right. I swear bro my head feels like it’s been in a blender. Idk how to fix it or even where to begin. I feel like I just woke from a shit storm and everything is thrown everywhere and I’m here trying to worry about finances. Mission. My sick dog. My side business. My annoying wife. My addiction to women and validation. My new place need so much work done to it. And I need even more work. I’m taking on so much. I guess it’s overwhelming and finding a starting point has been rough. I’m all over the place

[–]rocknrollchuck2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Idk how to fix it or even where to begin.

I would focus on two things: finances and the work on the new place. These are both things that are directly under your control. If your side business is contributing to your finances significantly, then put effort into that as well. If it's a lot of time and energy invested for minimal return at the moment, then table it for the time being.

Pick one project to work on this weekend, and decide on one project to tackle for next weekend. Get one project done per weekend, and plan each one for the following week ahead of time.

My sick dog

Take it to the vet if needed, do what you can.

My annoying wife

Just STFU. There's nothing more you can do at the moment. Withdraw your attention some and focus on you.

My addiction to women and validation.

This will somewhat sort itself as you figure out your dynamic with your wife. Keep this on the back burner for now.

Mission

Table this for now until you have some breathing room.

And I need even more work

Pick one thing you can work on for you, and do it. Get a handle on that, and then pick another thing. One step at a time. Make a list of the things you need to do on all of these areas, and just tackle them one at a time. Writing it down will help you sort it out, and will also help you get rid of that overwhelmed feeling.

[–]InconspicuousWand[S] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Good plan. I’ll see you over at OYS next week

[–]rocknrollchuck0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I'll be looking for your post.

[–]Brushyourteethm83 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Your biggest covert contract right now:

"Either 0 to 60 change for me right now into something that I don't have a clear picture of (while I act like a dick towards you) or it's over."

If you've been a drunk captain up til now then she isn't going to trust you. Your acting out is likely to blow the relationship up if you keep the pedal to the floor like this.

Keep it up and she'll go somewhere else for the comfort and acceptance or you'll wind up divorced.

[–]SepeanRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

It’s completely standard. The calling you an asshole thing gets worse and worse until the main event.

[–]MrChad_ThundercockBig Red Machine2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

“But there’s still an angry wife at times“

She can sense the dynamics changing and doesn’t like it. She doesn’t want her beta provider growing a pair of balls and turning hot all of a sudden.

It’s gets worse before it gets better. She probably resents you too, all those years of being an absent alpha.... she was forced to take chrage (because you didn’t) hence the control freak.

She’s not immediately going to jump on board and be a little school girl again. Give her time, she will.

“do I constantly leave her in the dark till she just accept this is how it is”

How long you been since taking the pill?

[–]screechhaterRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

How much more work you gonna do for “Mister Ram-bone ?”

[–]screechhaterRed Beret1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Ya.

1/2 a bathroom.

Wow.

That’s fucking choice man. You picked a high value, quality one there.

Fuck, you got some work to do

How about a little comfort ? Fucktard

[–]InconspicuousWand[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I give her tons of comfort. She’s still being a cunt. So idc

[–]screechhaterRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Will she adjust in time or should I give her a little guidance as to why this all is happening?

Not enough, or, you have been such a shitty captain, she can't sum up the changes.

Take a trip over to OYS and get started

[–]470_2_700_nm1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

“But I’m sure I’m Moving a little faster than I should be ”

Well then slow your roll. Seems to me MRP is doing more damage than harm with you because you type like you have it all down, but then you show me with the cleaning bathroom incident that you still know well how to deer.

I think the other post talking about you being a kid with dinamite is spot on. You’re going to blow yourself up here.

[–]JudgeDoom691 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

She will text me. Asking why I have to ruin her day.

Text only for logistics. "I'll be home at 6, do we need bread?"

Serious conversations need to happen face to face. It's too easy to misjudge tone when reading a text

[–]Rian_StoneMod / Red Beret1 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy

deleted What is this?

[–]InconspicuousWand[S] 1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

this is where I wonder what’s really going on in my head. In a huge sense I don’t care if she does. I been saying I don’t care.

But then I care enough to ask this question.

Why?

Maybe the feeling of not wanting to be a totally jerk to her. But it’s almost she leaves me no choice. It’s like she’s doing all this stuff. I just don’t want to deal with. And just remove my attention. Constantly bc she sucks to be around. And then I think. Well she seems lost by why all this is going on.

Maybe I should tell her. So she knows there’s a purpose behind my actions and I’m not just doing this for no reason.

Like I want to shake her and be like why can’t you just lighten up and be fun. She’s all about control. She even will try to take it upon herself to control what I drink “maybe you should have water instead of orange juice”

Maybe not.. I’ll take orange juice. Like wtf it’s come to the point where I can’t even just drink what the fuck I want to drink without her chimming in

So that’s why I just don’t care. I realize I’m just ranting now. I’m going to meditate.

[–]Rian_StoneMod / Red Beret1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

deleted What is this?

[–]InconspicuousWand[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

To be able to what. Be a totally jerk?

[–]Rian_StoneMod / Red Beret1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

deleted What is this?

[–]InconspicuousWand[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I’d feel more guilt than anything

[–]gameoflibidos0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

She even will try to take it upon herself to control what I drink “maybe you should have water instead of orange juice”

This is a microcosm of a lot of your problem. This comment gets to you, it irritates you, it rattles your emotions. That simple comment is rattling your frame.

In that situation, you completely ignore she even opened her mouth, drink some OJ and go about your business. Eventually when you are comfortable with these types of comments no affecting you what-so-ever, you can begin to banter back with her. .."Water doesn't help get the pussy taste out of my mouth"

[–]boy_named_su1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

She sucking your dick on the regular?

[–]InconspicuousWand[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Yes

[–]boy_named_su0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Well thats good. I'd give her 10% more comfort

[–]FoxShitNasty830 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Do you get comfort tests at all? She sounds fucking exactly like my wife .. so I'm going to also ask about her health?

I'm practicing my arsehole game this week and I'm finding the same as you in terms of reaction but mine has been a slower roll. Maybe it's too far emotionally detached... Idk also sounds like you don't like her much either. Do you take some time to sit down and listen to her shit like look her in the eyes for 20 mins or so and let her rant on to get whatever it is out her system? (Without fixing it) I find my wife is more open once she has done this.

[–]weakandsensitive0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Will she adjust in time or should I give her a little guidance as to why this all is happening?

Assume the answer is "No." Now what?

You do not control how other people behave. You never will.

Figure your shit out. Ultimately, she doesn't matter. You do you.

Your biggest issue right now is that you're treating all of this as a huge covert contract.

I’m realizing that. And I just. Don’t. Fucking. Want to.

So kick her ass out. What are you waiting for? Permission from retards? Okay - you have my permission.

Fuck you come off as a whiny bitch.

And I can't believe you come to random retards on the internet to make your decisions for you.



You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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