FR: Came in her mouth, she wasn't happy

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June 21, 2018

40 y/o, 6'4" 253lbs, doing SL 5x5. Making great progress following MRP program,

Sex went from 2x/mo starfish/ duty to 2-3x/wk & enthusiastic since starting MRP in January. Been pushing the envelope sexually, she's liked it all so far (hard pounding, doggy style, throwing her around, pulling hair, dirty talk) just doing the things I want to do instead of gentle love making & constantly asking her if it feels good to her.

Prior to last night, I have blasted in my wife's mouth exactly once - which was the first time she blew me, 17 years ago. She swallowed, then told me she wasn't cool with it, don't do it again. I didn't...EVER... even though that's exactly what I've wanted to do. This might have been my first failed shit test.

So, it's the tail end of shark week, and I initiated after we had a couple of drinks. Started out with her playing with my dick, I initiated sex, but she resisted, orbs still shark week (she feels gross, etc). I told her to suck my dick, she did. I pulled her hair, pushed her head down a little and thrusted into her some - nothing rough, but all things I've never really done to her. She didn't protest, but I could tell she wasn't thrilled. At that point, I knew she'd be saying something to her good little beta boy after i finished to get me back in line...fuck it, might as well go all-in, right? The time came for the grand finale, I said "mmmm, I'm gonna cum in your mouth" a couple of seconds before blast off - she didn't make an effort to stop it (didn't take my dick out) so I blasted, she took the first burst, then got up quickly as the remainder shot onto my belly. I could hear her scrambling and spitting in the bathroom, etc...she was pissed & appeared near tears when I next saw her.

Without ever saying I'm sorry, I simply said, "I never thought you would react that way" her: "in all our time together, you haven't done that because you know I don't like it...i only blew you because I knew you wanted sex - I was doing you a favor" me: "I just did what felt good to me" her: "like pulling my hair and pushing my head down? You know I don't like that" me: "yeah, I liked all of that... maybe the best blowjob you've ever given me" kissed her forehead, told her I love her and went to sleep.

Nothing awkward this morning, normal hugs and kisses when I left for work. I'm not sure I will get another BJ to completion anytime soon, but it felt good to do what I've wanted to do all along. I probably should've waited for my SMV to increase before being so bold, but WTH, I went for it and seem to have produced no ill effects.


Post Information
Title FR: Came in her mouth, she wasn't happy
Author ChokingDownRP
Upvotes 16
Comments 64
Date 21 June 2018 08:42 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit askMRP
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Red Pill terms found in post:
betasexual market valueshit test

[–]johneyapocalypse28 points29 points  (1 child) | Copy

Nothing says attraction like "I was doing you a favor."

With that said, continue being bold.

Waiting is for assholes.

[–]ChokingDownRPRed Beret[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

My take was "I was doing you a favor" was just her words after I blew my load in her mouth... months ago, I just wouldn't have been getting blown. judging by her actions (blowing me) attraction is building, though still a ways to go.

[–]ChokingDownRPRed Beret[S] 15 points16 points  (12 children) | Copy

UPDATE: Fortune favors the bold. Wife was perfectly happy today - like happier than she ever is. I mentioned earlier that she handled her shit around the house today, tonight she handled my dick with much enthusiasm. There was a hint of comfort seeking, which I provided, then SHE initiated as I was getting ready for bed. I rewarded her with all the dominance I could muster late on a Thursday night...a good time was had by all. Lessons learned - do what I want & pay attention only to what she does, not what she says.

Fuck - as I type this I'm realizing that I'm seriously viewing sex as validation and as a measuring stick of my progress. Hard not to with the 180 that's happening in my sex life..but I've got to stop viewing it that way.

[–]ReddJiveRed Beret14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy

Fuck - as I type this I'm realizing that I'm seriously viewing sex as validation and as a measuring stick of my progress. Hard not to with the 180 that's happening in my sex life..but I've got to stop viewing it that way.

So we have porn level interest from the peanut gallery but this gets missed.

This is key. OP is starting to see through the fog.

[–]Downhere_Seeds4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Semen is a natural anti-depressant for women, now you know what to do when she needs cheering up.

[–]Sapphire_Jizz0 points1 point  (9 children) | Copy

Nice! Did you cum in her mouth? Did she make it clear that she would swallow? How was the status of that elephant during tonight's encounter?

[–]ChokingDownRPRed Beret[S] 3 points4 points  (8 children) | Copy

She didn't bring it up, so I didn't bring it up. I did what I normally do - blew it inside her. We climaxed together. It would have been completely autistic to bring it up or to try to blow a load in her mouth. Her actions (comfort seeking & initiating) tell me she was ok with it. Next time she blows me to completion, I will do it again (with the same warning I gave this time).

[–]InChargeManRed Beret1 point2 points  (7 children) | Copy

I would say don't avoid it either. If it is something you really like then make that clear and act on it.

There was a time my wife didn't want me to cum in her mouth. Then it was cum but she would spit it out. Now she begs to swallow my cum daily.

[–]wkndatbernardus2 points3 points  (6 children) | Copy

How did u transition from no-load zone to load zone?

[–]InChargeManRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Neo: What are you trying to tell me? That I can dodge bullets?

Morpheus: No, Neo. I'm trying to tell you that when you're ready, you won't have to.

You don't think about how to "get her to ..." You don't think about her at all. Think about improving yourself to the point where you get ... without issue, it is just a question of where you get it from.

[–]ChokingDownRPRed Beret[S] 1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

I'm guessing he became a man whose cum she was eager to swallow.

[–]InChargeManRed Beret1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

Yes, although I really was never a BP poster boy. I think it was more related to realizing that I am the prize and if I want to blow my load in an attractive woman's mouth I'm going to do that. Once my wife understands that I desire something and I'm not wasting my life without that thing it is up to her.

"Life is too short to spend it not having frequent high quality sex."

[–]ChokingDownRPRed Beret[S] 2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Well said. Even at my fattest and bluest, I wasn't a complete dumpster fire either. I attribute my quick turnaround thus far to:

1) Having not been a beta bitch my whole life (captain of the major sports teams in HS, high n-count prior to developing one -itis for my now wife). I think I'm showing flashes of my younger confident (if not downright cocky) self and she likes it - a lot.

2) Really internalizing that the stay plan = the go plan. I have set a timeline for my own improvement and expect to see her completely on board. If I have to cut the rope, so be it, but I will live MY life the way I want to - fulfilled.

3) Call it a midlife crisis (wife has said that's what's going on with me), call it an awakening, swallowing the pill, whatever.... but I'm absolutely committed and driven to the idea InChargeMan ended with - "life is too short to..." it's not just about sex, it's my career, my parenting, my friendships, my emotional connection with my wife (yes, I said it, call me a faggot), every aspect of life. I was lazy and more!

4) Being assertive - giving everyone I deal with clear expectations instead of creating covert contracts they had no way of fulfilling their end of (they didn't know the contracts existed). NMMNG and WISNIFG helped immensely in recognizing that I have been manipulative and haven't been direct in communicating my wishes and desires to others. This has helped with my wife, my kids, at work, with friends, dealing with contractors, etc). Great stuff, sms makes me feel more confident dealing worth other people in general.

5) Tracking her cycles - I had no idea that there were such major swings in her behavior as a result of hormonal changes. Now I know when I have to turn up the alpha, or dial it back... her moods and sexual interest swings used to be a I can mostly accurately predict them.

[–]InChargeManRed Beret1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Sounds like you have a good plan. Now execute.

Call it a midlife crisis (wife has said that's what's going on with me)

This has me concerned. Are you talking with her about this shit? You have a lot of goals, be careful not to go rambo and remember to STFU about your planned improvement. That is the fastest way to fuck up your shit. You are not improving for her, so leave her out of it.

And for god's sake, don't get another BJ and think you've arrived. That gas pedal stays down from now on.

my emotional connection with my wife

Nothing wrong with that. Half of the guys on here will give shit for stuff like that, but the reality is that your goals are your goals. For me that is what makes being married worth it. Without it I would just have lots of plates.

[–]ChokingDownRPRed Beret[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I don't talk about it, but she's noticed changes and asked what, why, etc. All I've really said is "I've been lazy in certain aspects of my life and I'm working on that." She's brought it up during comfort tests, shit tests, arguments, etc. Other than what I said above (said once, and only once) I don't feel the need to tell her what, why or how I'm doing it.

Yep, foot staying on the gas. I realize there's no finish line.

[–]Rian_StoneMod / Red Beret12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy

She'll get over it. Be charming, this is what after care is for

[–]PersaeusRed Beret3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

except for the initial

"I never thought you would react that way"

your dialogue was good

I'm not sure I will get another BJ to completion anytime soon

wrong frame brother. i'm getting BJ from some woman

[–]MrChad_ThundercockChief Autist in Charge5 points6 points  (4 children) | Copy

Awesome. Don’t deer next time! You got sucked into a weird conversation.


increase SMV, start pushing boundaries even more.

[–]ChokingDownRPRed Beret[S] 10 points11 points  (3 children) | Copy

Whew, escaped without being called a faggot this time.

[–]mountainbiker1786 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy


[–]Rian_StoneMod / Red Beret11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

Funny how not acting like a faggot works that way 😁

[–]friendandadvisor2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think that being called a faggot may have something to do with being named "chokingdownanyfuckingthing".

[–]FrogTrainer2 points3 points  (6 children) | Copy

I had a similar experience pre RP, then finally got some full BJ's after RP. Made a post about it here:

[–]ChokingDownRPRed Beret[S] 0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

I've read your thread previously. I too had many girls swallow before I got with my now wife. Loved it. Had one girl that let me finish 100% of the time in her mouth and swallowed every last drop. 1st BJ my wife gave me, she swallowed like a champ (I didn't ask, just did what I wanted). She told me to never do that again, she didn't like it & I didn't. In hindsight, I could've had my loads swallowed for the past 17 years if I'd played it right in that moment. She was crazy about me, continuing to cum in her mouth wouldn't have been a deal breaker at all. Instead, I let her clip my balls and lead me down the path to pathetic beta. Sad part is, I had abundance at the time, not sure etc I was thinking.

[–]trp_throwaway_1230 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

I've read this thread as well. I've been struggling with the lack of finish on the BJ front for all 10 years my wife and I have been together. I think I've got solid SMV, a good job, I'm fit, and I'm a pretty good captain, but my wife is just not interested in doing it. The other night before we got down to business I made it clear that was what I wanted and after about 10-15 minutes of BJ she asked if we could fuck and I said, "No, you know what I want to do" and she said she wasn't cool with that, that I know she isn't cool with that, and that if we fucked instead we could both get off. At that point I wasn't interested in either options as negotiations aren't really a turn on. I had a business trip the rest of the week and I've been gone since then which has been nice to be unavailable.

I just don't know where to go from here. It's really starting to bother me that she won't do this and part of me feels like a dick making this an issue, but I'm sick of 10-15 min vanilla/duty sex. She says she has an aversion to swallowing (which I interpret as she has an aversion to swallowing for me). It's really starting to aggravate me though. I don't want to go full Rambo but I'm seriously considering withholding sex from her because why should I meet her needs if she's not willing to meet mine? Now if/when she ever does swallow I'll wonder if she's just doing it to placate me or because she actually enjoys it. The former would definitely not be as enjoyable for me as the latter. Any advice is appreciated.

[–]InChargeManRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

  1. Everything she says ends with "right now".

  2. If late 90's Brad Pitt was there she would swallow his cum like it is the elixir of life. She would also lick his asshole while jerking him off.

I'll wonder if she's just doing it to placate me or because she actually enjoys it

  1. Pure BP thinking. Your dick doesn't care why it's being sucked and neither should you. Also, the "why" a woman does anything is able to change like the wind, both in the moment and afterward. Today's "favor" will be tomorrows desire and next week's obsession.

Bottom line: Are you the prize?

[–]ChokingDownRPRed Beret[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

As my wife told me - she only did it as a favor, and I (in her WORDS) disrespectfully came in her mouth. If you listen to their words, you'll believe that. If you buy into hypergamy and read about countless examples of women who changed when their husbands alpha'd up, you'll realize that what they say is meaningless. Bottom line is she'll blow you if she feels it's what's necessary to keep a quality man. You're likely not a quality man in her eyes yet (just as I'm not yet there myself). She does as little to satisfy you as you allow her to do.

[–]trp_throwaway_1230 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Good call. I guess I need to figure out how to handle it tactically tonight after work. Do I tell her from now I on expect that as part of a blowjob or what? I think she's going to want sex for sure. I'm sick of just acquescing to that though.

[–]ChokingDownRPRed Beret[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Instead of negotiating for it, I'd give her a nice surprise sometime when she blows you and just cum in her mouth. Notice in my OP, I didn't tell her it was coming until it was about to happen, not pre-arranged, not agreed upon, I just did it. That came from a place of "this is something I want, either she does it, or I continue working on myself and I'll find someone else who wants to please me." What you're talking about doing is some combination of going Rambo and negotiating desire.

Obviously I'm the authority on such matters since I've cum in one woman's mouth once in 17 years (sarcasm).

[–]Fritz_Frauenraub4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

Does your wife post on reddit as u/ChokingDownChokingDownRP?

[–]ChokingDownRPRed Beret[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

God damn that's funny.

[–]Rian_StoneMod / Red Beret5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

She'll get over it. Be charming

[–]RPAlternate42Red Beret3 points4 points  (5 children) | Copy

Nothing changes. You initiate like you want and you tell her you want blowjobs like you want. And when she refused, you treat it like any sexual rejection and be unavailable.

Remember, you have to be physically unavailable or she just sees you ignoring get around the house... So go somewhere.

[–]ChokingDownRPRed Beret[S] 0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

Thanks. I definitely need to change my strategy on this... we have 3 kids under 7, initiation are almost exclusively after bedtime and after I've worked out and chilled a little. I usually excuse myself to either read or write, rarely actually leaving the house after a rejection. I realize this should change as it stinks of butthurt when I do that, or worse just shut down and go to sleep. I make OI statements, like "I understand you're tired after last night" or "that's alright babe, rest up for tomorrow" but she knows I hate rejection.

[–]MrChad_ThundercockChief Autist in Charge5 points6 points  (3 children) | Copy

“initiation are almost exclusively after bedtime”

No. If you only initiate at the end of the day you already lost faggot. You got your faggot, faggot.

Always be initiating. Learn some basic text game for keeping the tension during the day, Game her in the morning in the bathroom getting ready for work, in the kitchen pick her and grind her on the edge of the counter, kino in the afternoon, game her using the kids, pick her up and carry her to the sofa for a quick grind and then leave her there. Game her with dread using coworkers or other young hot moms at the park,

GAME mother fucker, GAME. It never ends. It doesn’t start at nighttime. It’s a circle, like stuck in a do loop for you faggot programmers out there.

If only there was a manual about this.. ====>

[–]ChokingDownRPRed Beret[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I do game her - all day every day. As far as our window for having sex goes, it's at night.

[–]Reject4440 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Game her in the morning in the bathroom getting ready for work, in the kitchen pick her and grind her on the edge of the counter, kino in the afternoon, game her using the kids, pick her up and carry her to the sofa for a quick grind and then leave her there.

How is any of this possible when you work a full-time job in an office? I get the usefulness of "Game All Day" but I wake up at 5:00 am to go lift, home by 7:00, get showered and dressed (while wife gets kids ready for school), leave around 8:00 for long commute to office, work all day in the city, get home around 8:00 pm just in time to eat a quick family dinner and get the kids to bed. I do my best to be flirty and fun when we talk on the phone and when I'm home, and I'm not far enough along to game-by-text (I've generally been sticking to the advice for new guys to only use texting for logistics) but like OP, my window for initiating sex is exclusively late at night after the kids are asleep--and my window for in-person gaming isn't much longer. Obviously weekends are a bit different but during the week it's literally impossible for me to do much gaming of my wife, unless I sacrifice my gym time or start blowing off work.

[–]MrChad_ThundercockChief Autist in Charge0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You make it sound so boring and like going through life as a robot. In between all the transitions, do your kino, teasing, push/ pull, 10 sec kiss, drive bys, story telling about that hot young coworker that just started at your work - let her hamster stew on it the rest of the day, etc... makes it fun for the both of you. Talk about weekend plans. You need to keep it relevant, she sure won’t.

Highly recommend learning some basic text Game. Adds a whole new dimension. Even is she’s in a work meeting, it’s just you and her. Ask what color panties she has on today, tell her to pick up steak on the way home today and you’ll ice the beer down, tell her that you’re so horny today, tell her a funny little story that happened just now at work, tell her to be ready at home under the covers with no panties on when you get home. Tell her a car just ran over a little puppy this morning on way to work and you brought it to the vet and it’s okay.

She wants to feelz, give her some feelz. think McFly think.. text game is just between you two, you get to have a straight connection to her. Just don’t go retard and have important conversions or debates via text. Keep it light and playful. Its a great Priming tool.

Edit: take it slow with the text, if she’s new to it, probably won’t go along with the flirting at first. Start with some light stuff first. Your ass looked so fucking great this morning when you got out the shower, I love how your ass jiggles back and back when you brush your teeth, etc.. You’ll find that she’ll start venting about her work via text once you open this line of connection. Don’t solve her problems, just boo her villians and cheer her victories. Yep, sally is a fucking bitch, etc.

[–]Reach180Red Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Username checks out.

[–]screechhaterRed Beret1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

nice update OP

[–]ChokingDownRPRed Beret[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks, no doubt that if this had happened a few months ago it would have been WW3 in our house. I'm eternally grateful to MRP for giving me the tools I need to unfuck myself. Still a lot of work to do.

[–]turbospeedsc1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Keep increasing your SMV, after i started going consistently to the gym and making gains, sex got much better, sex life was good to average, but now is sex 6-7 times a week, wife always gave me good blowjobs, but now they're amazing, i can see her actually enjoying it, lately, i started making her rim me more of a psychological pleasure than a physical one, i been hitting the gym harder, and now she even enjoys rimming me to the point sometimes i remove her from giving me oral to actually fuck, she has requested anal like six times.

It's amazing how after lifting i experienced real primal desire, even better that when we started dating.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

If you were further along you could just tell her that was disrespectful of her to not swallow. That’s how I’d feel about it.

[–]nastynickdrRed Beret2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

I was doing you a favor

You are her beta bucks, the guy who she decided to settle down with, but most likely you are already aware of that. Words that come out from your mouth wont change that.

Dont bring this up again. If she does, tease her, A&A, just dont DEER. Keep working on yourself. Raising on your SMV. Figure out what you want and where you want to be. Draw your MAP and start working on it. Figure out what you expect from your wife. Is having a wife that wont let you finish into her mouth a deal breaker to you or not? (something you should have figured out before putting the ring on her finger, but oh well) Then set a timeline, if in X months your wife still isnt attracted to you/doing the things you want, maybe its time to walk and find other girl(s) that want to fuck you.

[–]ChokingDownRPRed Beret[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

We got together when I was 21, broke, working in a restaurant, partying, driving an old beat up pickup truck. She's from a wealthy family. She wasn't initially south me as her BB. I'm not a career beta bux, though I've let myself become BB.

I'm completely on board with the rest of your post and working the program hard.

[–]maxofreddit1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I found that the more my wife saw things turning me on, the more “normal” they became. It isn’t even a matter of necessarily telling her outright, but I made it obvious when I was enjoying what she was doing. I.e. as she got more fun with dirty talk, I was sure to not hold back when I came. It didn’t take long before she was initiating that type of thing.

There wasn’t any kind of discussion afterwards apart from me saying something along the lines of,”That was fucking FUN.”

If she sees/feels/hears you having fun, she’s much more likely to have fun, with everything, including sex.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Your story reminded me of this U-tube that made it on my playlist.

"Wrong Hole"

Video is funny, but the dude in it is a total beta, DEERing and placating. In this video fantasy his whining leads to more wrong holes, in real life the same whining will lead to another 17 years of dead-mouth.

[–]TeachMeTheWaysOfRP2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I take the gentleman approach to this. I always nut on the face, at least once, before blasting in her mouth. They seem more docile after a few nuts to the face.

[–]InChargeManRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Without ever saying I'm sorry


[–]BluepillProfessorMod / Red Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

This will turn out fine if you hold frame. I would make cum in mouth joked at every opportunity. Tell her you are sorry she doesn't like it but you do so maybe there is a compromise? How about you just cum in her mouth half the time?

That's fair.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

just let her know you can find someone else who will do it without bitching like a cunt

[–]crimson_chris0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Late comment but you'd be surprised with what a little confidence and cockiness can do.

Take what you want from your wife, your career, your family - no one is going to give it to and don't ask permission.

I think the craziest thing I have done is basically face fuck my wife in a 69. She was on her back sucking me off, I got on top and you can imagine the rest. I thought she was going to be pissed (like you) but she did not care I was owning my shit and she wanted to please me. Keep up the good work and be a man that she wants to swallow.

[–]ChokingDownRPRed Beret[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks for the good advice. No doubt it's attractive to women when men take what they want (rape excluded)

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Fake it until you make it. Even if you aren’t attractive, act like you are. So you did. And got predictable results but who cares. At least now she knows the expectations you’ve been too chicken shit to tell her about.

[–]ChokingDownRPRed Beret[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

That's my attitude, enough walking on eggshells, enough pretending I don't want to do despicable things to her, enough of the BS. If I start being who I really am, and She's not cool with it, I'll find someone younger and hotter who is (after I stop being a fat 253lb hunk of shit of course).

[–]JDRoedellRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

after I stop being a fat 253lb hunk of shit of course).

Ya, I wouldn’t make any drastic moves until you fix this. Honestly it could be a year or more of lifting but nothing worthwhile comes easily or quick.

[–]creating_my_life0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

me: "yeah, I liked all of that... maybe the best blowjob you've ever given me" kissed her forehead, told her I love her and went to sleep.

Good Job.

Now keep working. Get fit, add a little dread, live a great life. Internalize that YOU are doing HER a favor.

[–]oneredguy0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You're winning. Don't let her try to take that from you.

Next time she's blowing you, and my god make sure there's more. Look her right in the eyes, as you grab her by the hair and move her head, tell her, I'm going to cum in you mouth.

Hell actually I can't even imagine your life.

You can't go grab her head and fuck it and she'll smile after cause she at least knows you aren't fucking a different girl?

Why not just go do what I did then?

When the girl I married spit up my cum like two months into dating I was fucking pissed. Talked all about it over at ppd where I was shit posting at the time. I thought long and hard about just cheating on her. But didn't at that time. And she somehow saw it and now I'm like years past that.

I have nothing to offer you here. I just can't believe it. You're wife disrespects you this much? And you allow it? Oh man I can't post what I want to post. Progfagism won't even allow terps to post this.

But bro have you tried to make her?

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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