NMMNG says not to seek external validation. Is working on raising our SMV not doing just that?

2ndal · 2018-06-04T22:55:54+00:00

You do those things because you care about your appearance, not because you get your self worth and validation from the reaction others give you (or don't) because of your appearance.

Fritz_Frauenraub · 2018-06-04T23:55:25+00:00

Less time spinning your wheels over dumbass MRP paradoxes and more time lifting and improving yourself

suprathepeg · 2018-06-05T02:22:52+00:00

One of the hardest concepts to openly admit to yourself is that you need to put yourself first. Develop yourself first. Care for yourself first. Lead yourself first.

I think a better way of looking at it is you take a mental picture of your picture of yourself if you could do and be your own ideal. Then work backward from there. Develop goals, plans to meet those goals and act it all out.

When you do that you don’t imagine yourself fat, lonely and unfulfilled do you?

Rian_Stone · 2018-06-04T21:57:15+00:00

when you get another cert for higher pay at work, are you doing it for your boss validation, or for better job prospects?

TimeToDad · 2018-06-04T22:54:17+00:00

Side note, I have this horrible tendency, where if I'm planning to do something, and then someone asks me to do that thing, I really don't want to do it anymore. And I'm starting to realize, I should do it anyways, because I want to and not give a second thought to what that person thinks about my motivations.

DeplorableRay · 2018-06-04T23:15:07+00:00

There is a difference between accepting yourself, and others accepting you. You can not like yourself and guarantee others won’t, or you can like yourself and hope others do. Hoping others do is a bad strategy. You have to like yourself, and you need a strategy for others to like you. The idea of RP is to give you the tool box for improving both. NMMNG is about accepting yourself internally. While material referring to dread is about how people view you externally.

A lot of the material is about personal growth and cover both internal acceptance and external acceptance. But they aren’t the same thing.

straius · Tue Jun 5 17:11:39 2018 UTC

Validation not equal to value. You are building value. The validation if your efforts will be in greater successful outcomes in your favor. Feeling good about that is not validation, it's satisfaction.

Feeling you have no worth without attention, so you seek out attention to suppress negative emotion, THAT'S validation. Seeking out attention because you like the feminine energy and feel more vitalized after flirting, is not validation.

youcantdenythat · 2018-06-05T11:25:01+00:00

What about self validation?

Don't you want to be nice to yourself? NMMNG is abou others.

Do you want people to be nice to you?

What do you want to see when you look in the mirror? A dirty fat guy? A lazy good-for-nothing?

Raising your smv isn't about others, it's about you. It's about growing up and becoming a mature man. For you.

It will give you opportunities that you never had before. Other people will respect you more and will tend to defer to your judgement and help you get what you want.

You're not improving because you want others validation. You're doing it because you recognize all of the other benefits that a high smv man has that you won't.

RealityTastesGreat · 2018-06-06T16:02:04+00:00

Its not what you do but why you do it

MrChad_Thundercock · 2018-06-04T23:10:07+00:00

Don’t get stuck on stupid.

Get to work faggot.

[deleted] · 2018-06-05T04:24:33+00:00

Accepting yourself is not the same as being content with your life. Seeing flaws that can be improved is not the same as denigrating yourself for having them. Also, who the fuck cares what some book said. Do you believe in everything you read? This isn't science and there no rules. Just some words of wisdom some people share to point the way. You still have to carve your own path to get there.

Title	NMMNG says not to seek external validation. Is working on raising our SMV not doing just that?
Author	TimeToDad
Upvotes	13
Comments	35
Date	June 4, 2018 9:55 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/8olbxy/nmmng_says_not_to_seek_external_validation_is/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/nmmng-says-not-to-seek-external-validation-is.204403 https://theredarchive.com/post/204403