One of the best sessions my wife and I had was on a trip to the Caribbean.

We were waiting for our room to be ready at the adults only all-inclusive resort, sipping a few drinks and walking around the grounds. Once our room was ready, we headed up—tipsy and loose, but not drunk—to check it out. The room was impressive: well appointed, with a great view of the ocean, a large bed, and elegant decor. The lights were dim and the TV on and set to the a looped advertisement for the hotel’s spa, with relaxing zen music. We immediately started to make out, and it quickly escalated to one of the longest, most sensual and passionate fucks we’ve ever had. Our inhibitions were completely gone. It was great.

These are the types of experiences we seek to recreate, of course. It hit all of the four DEVI marks from SGM with ease. I was dominant, emotions were strong, being away from the kids and at a hotel provided variety, and the setting and music fueled immersion.

Dominance, emotion, and even variety are fairly easily to replicate at home outside of vacations, but I struggle with increasing what I call “natural” as opposed to “manufactured” immersion. I have explored these manufactured scenarios to create immersion—things like the Coconut Spa—to some success, and while they can be fun, their immersion power fades the more you use it, and its lack of spontaneity gives it an artificial (even hokey) feel that I am looking to avoid.

With that, I ask you: how are you generating more “natural” scenarios at home that provide high levels of immersion? Bonus points if you’re doing this with small kids in the house.