Reading Sidebar as Quick as I can, but Urgent Advice Needed . . .

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March 13, 2018

I am new to MRP, but I can't get enough of it. I used to (not too long ago) be a beta poster child, but am really pulling my shit together. It has been life changing and I am only getting started. Just in the last couple weeks I have read NMMNG and MMSLP. I DEFINITELY need to re-read them, as there is a lot of information I didn't soak up.

Anyway, I am faced with a situation tonight that I need some advice on. I know I will find it through more studying, but I don't want to fuck this up. Hopefully you guys can lend me some insight in the mean time.

Every time we have sex, my wife is the one with frame. I want it often and am adventurous, and she wants it every 3-4 months and is pretty conservative. So our whole marriage it has been me initiating every day or so and getting turned down and her initiating every 3-4 months and me giving her the vanilla sex she wants. Tonight she has asked for sex, and the only thing that comes to mind that will allow me to maintain frame is to deny her (which I know is breaking a cardinal rule), so without flat-out denying her, how can I maintain frame when she is initiating sex on her terms (which are unacceptable to me [i.e., every 3-4 months and totally vanilla])?

It is possible this won't happen again for 3-4 months, so I don't want to fuck this up.


EDIT: Thank you so much guys...I really appreciate it. Great, great advice. I'm going to enjoy it, and I am going to do it for me.

Post Information
Title Reading Sidebar as Quick as I can, but Urgent Advice Needed . . .
Author ThrowAway8056443228
Upvotes 9
Comments 29
Date 13 March 2018 09:11 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Original Link
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Red Pill terms found in post:

[–]creating_my_life25 points26 points  (1 child) | Copy

STFU, enjoy your vanilla sex tonight, and keep reading like your life depends on it. Anything else is going Rambo for you.

[–]johneyapocalypse1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Your advice sounds good to me but maybe if he had read the sidebar more quickly - like Steve Austin bionic speed - he could have fucked his wife and a neighbor - in a virile, lusty way that would have made Caligula proud.

Regarding the "like your life depends on it" what if he had jumped in front of a bus first? I mean if he came home bloody and bandaged he could have maybe had his first orgy?

[–]FlyingSexistPig7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don't get into power struggles with your wife. Especially over sex.

So, fuck her tonight, and keep working on yourself.

This is not a war that will be one in a single fight. This is a campaign that will last your entire life. If you don't do stupid things, it is a war that you will win easily.

[–]cholomiteMod / BP Downvote Magnet13 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy

Act like you just got done fucking 2 bitches and you'll fuck her too because why the fuck not. Enjoy yourself and stop caring so much about this and that. Keep improving yourself and as your value grows, your options will grow and you can re-evaluate your priorities as time goes on.

My second piece of advice would be to focus on your pleasure only and don't give two shits about trying to make her feel good.

[–]TaipanshimshonRed Beret5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Slow down. Get laid. She is just there. Sooner than you think but later than you hope you will not think about this kind of stuff

[–]SteelToeShitKickerRed Beret7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy

So, what's keeping your from leaving? I wouldn't stick around for sex 3-4 times a year.

[–]zeno_of_shitium0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy


[–]BobbyPeru7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

Rule number 42:

Turn vanilla sex into caveman sex.

[–]alchamest3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

Accept where you are, this is not a quick sprint you are under taking, Accept that sex will not improve straight away, Give yourself minimum 6months to a year to unfuck yourself and make gradual process.

If you care about your wife, you will need to allow time for her to adjust to the improving you. There is a 1000 foot rope analogy around here somewhere.

Work on yourself everyday, a little bit every day, and in 6 months you will probably have had sex 2 more times. As you work on yourself, remember one thing, No one gives a fuck about what you want. The only person that can get you what you want is you. No ones cares. You wife does not give a fuck almost literally. You are in a deadbedroom situation and IMO sex that infrequent is not a sexual relationship. Work on yourself, over time cultivate a mindset where you are willing to leave the relationship if you cannot get what you need from it. But as i mentioned before, if you care about your wife, you need to be patient. This is a long game.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

[–]alchamest1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

thanks for posting that link, Actually thanks for both the link to it and for the post itself, i have found the analogy very helpful & have witnessed it in my life.

[–]rocknrollchuck2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah, enjoy it and do it for you. She's got you on a drip-feed: just enough sex to keep you from leaving, while she benefits daily from the other things you provide for her. But it's not her fault - it's yours.

Read this to understand where she's probably at mentally.

And go slow. Take your time with all of this. Don't go Rambo.

[–]screechhaterRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Dear Nubee.

Finger her until she comes and is grabbing your cock


Eat her until you are drinking from the Fountaim of Youth.

After that, get you coco in her for about five minutes and tell her to get up. You want to kiss her standing up.

Stick thy cock in the clit- gently. Deep passionate kisses. Turn her around deep passionate kisses. Both hands on breasts cock in ass area. Start playing with her clit.

She will invite the bend over and deeply fuck as she starts to grind.

Fuck at a relentless pace, meeting her movements

Come. Cuddle. It’s about a memorable fuck and connection.

All passionate if she dors not respond to anything, your fucked and better work on your shit to move on

Do you even lift ?

The “talk” setting a boundary

“ A relationship is not one sided as per only you deciding sex. If you will not allow me to intitiate, it is unhealthy both emotionally and physically. If it is that, we are done.”

And, mean it.

Yours, is not a relationship Nor is it a marriage. It’s a fucking sham and it’s your fault

[–]justpickanyusernameRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I hope you're not serious and I'm being trolled.

It is possible this won't happen again for 3-4 months, so I don't want to fuck this up.

Work on abundance. That will take time.

Tonight she has asked for sex, and the only thing that comes to mind that will allow me to maintain frame is to deny her.

You've already fucked up if you want to deny her. Don't make this harder than it needs to be. Fuck your wife hard tonight.

My toddler gets mad if I turn on a light switch or push a button that he wanted to push. He screams and says "No! I do it!"

[–]simbarlionRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Have sex and add something that gives you a bit of control.


Show your strength ( lift her up etc)

Do a position that is dominating (doggy)

No cuddles at the end.

[–]-DiscoStu0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Have sex for you. Do anything you want and be selfish. Use her body for your pleasure. Ignore her needs and make sure all of yours are fulfilled tonight.

[–]MrChad_ThundercockChief Autist in Charge0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Gay post.

[–]DeeMooreDeeMarriet0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy


[–]The_LitzRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Fuck her the way you like it, her pleusure is secondary.

One night does not determine your journey, the rest if your life does.

[–]ArticulateSavage0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

"I want it often and am adventurous, and she wants it every 3-4 months and is pretty conservative."

With you... If Magic Mike walked through your front door while you were at work do you think what transpired next would be vanilla?

Get to work. Persistent, dedicated effort over time. Sidebar. Weights. Take care of yourself, you sound like a 'nice guy.'

[–]donedreadpirateRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Sounds like she gets her fill with your head up her ass. That's some kinky shit, really.

[–]FoxShitNasty830 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It maybe too early but rather than just deny her sex you need to tell her sex sucks so make it good or don't bother... Plus fuck her good and don't forget to be fun.

[–]RedPillCoach-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

how can I maintain frame when she is initiating sex on her terms

I would screw her good whether you initiate or her. Why do you want to separate the two? Why can't you initiate when you want and reward her for initiating? Can you even conceive of a world where you bring negative consequences for repeated sexual denials beyond your personal butthurt?

Since you said your need for advice is "urgent" know that you are the type of man I am Coaching. If you are interested in getting personal help with your situation my website and contact information is at:

Private Coaching is a lot more expensive than the free advice you get on Reddit but personal help can be useful if you can afford it and we can help you move forward faster.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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