Just found the RP a couple of days ago and trying to get through all the posts and ordering some of these books.
What just happened probably 30 minutes ago.
So I get home after hitting the gym for about for an hour and I'm down in the basement working. I own a business and all of my employees are remote.
I head up around 11:30am and I decide to make an early lunch because I'm hungry as shit after working out. Wife is going to be headed out with our youngest daughter and her mom to go get some lunch. Cool no big deal. I'll hit a quick lunch and then get back to it for a bit.
I'm sitting there and while I'm eating my wife and I are talking my mother in law gets to our house and walks in with our youngest daughter. She picked her up from school because she was doing some activity there.
The first thing out of her mouth to me "Wow is that all you do all day sit at home and eat sushi?" Then proceeds to laugh.
I sit there mid bite and there is a trigger in my head that just got turned over. Like wtf lady, I build a business for this family, your daughter and your grandkids have everything they can possibly want and YOU say that shit to me?
I continue to chew my food. I think I said something like "yeah it's lunch time and I'm hungry." Continued to chew and ponder wtf just happened while she's chatting merrily to my wife who I think might have caught something shift in my demeanor because later when she was leaving she came over to give me a hug and asked if I was ok. Yeah I’m good. Shrug
I didn't think I gave any indication that it bothered me but they see shit you don't.
So RP bros, I come here for advice. How would you handle that situation?
I think I have my shit fairly in order. I eat good, I take care of my business, my family, but I have thin skin and easily get rattled by verbal strikes.
What the fuck do I care what anyone thinks or what my mother in law thinks?
How do I control the rage of wanting to smash shit when I'm disrespected?
When I was younger I wouldn't hesitate to get into a scrap because I was disrespected.
I'm 32 now and it seems like everyone has a degree in shit talking except for me. Beating someone's ass isn't exactly a way to solve any problems unless you want to end up in prison. It's especially not a way to solve problems with females.
My wife's family are fucking word smiths when it comes to talking shit as well. I'm sort of lost in this dance of sarcastic jabs and back and forth. It wasn't how I was raised. So I struggle with it.
I know for a fact that they are supportive and have been super appreciative of everything I do for the family.
The women in particular though just like to run their mouth and check you CONSTANTLY.
- How would you have dealt with the above situation? 2) How do I control this rage that almost consumes me when someone "disrespects" me? 3) When someone is talking shit to you in a "fun" way but really are just disprecting you... do you get in the mud with them or just ignore them and walk away? Or do you say some sarcastic shit back that makes everyone laugh at them? 4) How do quiet stoic guys who aren't prone to shit talking, or making fun of people deal with others who try and talk shit in front of others to try and get a rise out of you?
I feel like this is a weakness I need to address immediately. Any thoughts from you guys who have this shit down would be appreciated.
Foundation stuff that /u/creating_my_life requested in one of the below posts.
Do you own your shit? What's your age, height, weight, bodyfat, and squat, anyways? Are you well-groomed? Fun?
Age: 32 Weight: 155 Height: 5'8" Bodyfat: not sure. I kind of have abs? Squat: don't know Well groomed: I shave, shower, and brush my teeth, occasionally do my hair. It's not a priority for sure. Fun: Probably ranked low here. I work constantly either at my day job (just left not too long ago) or on my business. As you can see from this post and below I'm also insecure.
In highschool I benched 265 at 135lbs and was a state placer in wrestling. Played corner in football as well. Ran a 4.5 40 and could squat over 400 lbs. Was recruited by some d2 schools for wrestling but didn't want to go north.
Now? A shadow of my former self and I'm currently in physical rebuild mode. I met my wife at 18 at my physical peak.
10 years after college I climbed the corporate ladder and sat on my ass 10 to 12 hours a day doing very little physically other than the occasional sports pickup game.
At 30 I decided I need to leave corp America and started my own import / ecommerce business. What ensued was 2 years of 7 days a week 4-6 hours of sleep per night plus my day job. My already slacking physical activity dropped to almost nothing. In the Fall of 2017 I got the stomach flu and for the first time in my life I threw my back out. Fucked up. Then two months later while stretching I threw it out again. Never before have I felt so worthless.
At this point my business was to the point where it had replaced my day jobs income. I needed alot as my wife is a stay at home wife / mom and we have two kids. In Jan of 2018 I left and have since been going to the gym. I've been swimming (yeah lol I know) but it's been good for my lower back. I've been doing some resistance training and isometrics until I feel like I can start lifting again. My plan in the next few weeks is:
M-F- swim 1hr, pickup games of sports at night T, R, lift high rep for now and move to bigger loads after listening to body S,S - air bike / yoga whatever
As far as being fun. I'm working on it. I put up goals and knock them down. I guess I'm just a serious dude who needs to get my emotional self checked. I'm working through all the books and sidebar.