659,329 posts

Holy crap, life is good ! What are some of you thinking ?

by ImSteveMcQueen | January 08, 2018 | askMRP

18 upvotes

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Holy crap, I can't believe some of the horror stories I read on here. A year ago I was in a crappy relationship too, but nothing like what some of you have.

What the fuck goes through some of your minds ? I have 2 questions. 1) Why aren't you working on yourself ? 2) Why do you give a fuck what she says ?

Why aren't you working on yourself ? When your car breaks down, what do you do ? You fix it ! Do you drive around on a flat tire ? No. Do you try to get groceries with it if the bumper is falling off ? No.

So why are some of you so friggin hesitant to read and lift ? Like WTF ? Your life is shit, your wife has no respect for you and yet you waffle around spend your time arguing with your wife. Let me give you a tip: Absolutely nothing that comes out of your mouth is going to fix you or your relationship. That is why we say "Acta, non verba". The only thing that will change your life is YOU working on YOU. Period. End of story.

When your life is screwed up, you should be spending every spare minute and even some essential minutes working on YOU. Read NMMNG 3 times. Read WISNIFG. Read it again. And again. Hit the gym regularly. Can you press your body weight ? Can you run 5K ? Are your abs showing ? Can you plank while fucking or are you smothering her with your belly ?

Until you got this stuff down cold, there isn't any use coming on here to ask questions. Because nothing people tell you will make a difference. She doesn't care what you say. She is watching what you do and who you are.

Why do you care what she says ? If your partner disrespects, ignores you, you cheats on you, calls you names and doesn't follow your lead, why do you care ? She is showing you her nature and what she thinks of you. Nothing that you say will change her. You can't change her. She is what she is.

So the next time she acts badly, do you care ? No. You observe. You learn from it. You use it as motivation. You don't get butt hurt. You don't retaliate. You don't DEER. You don't negotiate. You work on you in the manner that is best for you. Period. End of story. Act like you are single. DGAF if she is butt hurt by that.

A year ago I was where some of you are. Not all relationships are savable, but your life is. You don't have to live a crappy life. You don't have to be in a crappy relationship with a shitty low value woman. AWALT, but not all women are going to respond positively to your growth and development. MRP saves the man. The relationship might or might not be salvageable. Put that front and center in your mind and do work on what you can: YOURSELF.

Holy crap my life is good now.

I lived in a bad relationship for 10 years. I used to tip toe around my ex, trying to make her happy. Letting her yell at me and control me. "Happy wife, happy life", right ? NOT ! Fuck that. Get to work. Start living up to your potential. Everything else will fall into place in due time.


Post Information
Title Holy crap, life is good ! What are some of you thinking ?
Author ImSteveMcQueen
Upvotes 18
Comments 32
Date 08 January 2018 04:28 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/204975
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/7ozmqy/holy_crap_life_is_good_what_are_some_of_you/
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Comments

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red10 points11 points  (9 children) | Copy

What meds did the shrink put you on man?

Your posts are filled with anger. Are you really working out in the gym? How do you have the time or energy to post this crap every few weeks?

Are you not going thru a divorce and shit?

Perhaps this is your way of dealing with it?

[–]Reach180Red Beret7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

This post is him trying to convince himself.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

He does post some weird shit.

[–]wekacuck0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Really? He reads more bewildered than angry to me...

[–]ImSteveMcQueen[S] 0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

I have absolutely no anger, bud. Life is good.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red5 points6 points  (4 children) | Copy

All right buddy. Congrats then I am happy for you.

[–]ImSteveMcQueen[S] 2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy

Pre RP, I was so fucking lost and I spent years butt hurt angry. And the harder I tried the worse it got.

Now it is like I live in a different universe. My HB8 gf booty calls me. Haven't had a single argument with her in 3 months. Not one. We genuinely have a lot of fun together.

The chick at the grocery store 15 years younger than me is taking pains to educate me on spices.

I live in my own house. I'm doing my hobbies. I have a great relationship with my kids.

Life is good.

The other day my gf is straddling me on the couch when she playfully shit tests me. "Are you an asshole ?" "Yes I'm an asshole ! Haven't you figured that out yet ?" "Why should I stay with you if you are an asshole ?" "You shouldn't ! The door is over there !" She laughs.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy

Hey man, that is great. If you are happy then I am happy.

But, your post read like it is written in the 3rd person and full of anger. It is also written in past tense.

Someone who knows you very little, could read that post and think:

"This guy is talking about himself" not "This guy is providing advice for other people to follow"

Which means you either:

Need to improve your writing skills

-or-

You still have some anger issues you need to work through.

-thus-

This post is an ego protection mechanisim for you to tell yourself this is how I "should" be acting.

But I have been known to read to far into things....

[–]NightFire452 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Looks like validation seeking to me also... Witness me.

[–]straius0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I read it as experimenting with a narrative device that didn't quite work. Think that's about it, like you said, writing style needs some work for the audience.

[–]Red-Curious4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

Why aren't you working on yourself ? When your car breaks down, what do you do ? You fix it !

That would be great if there was a uniformly agreed upon standard of what a "fixed man" looks like. We all know what a fixed car is like and how it's supposed to operate. That doesn't exist with masculinity. That's why the TRP sidebar identifies the sub with the phrase: "in a culture increasingly lacking a positive identity for men."

So why are some of you so friggin hesitant to read and lift ?

Most guys aren't willing to put in effort toward something without knowing they'll get a return for their effort. They're so used to everything failing that they don't believe "sidebar and lift" actually helps. It sounds like another snake oil salesman promising some get rich quick result with nominal effort.

Also, most of the guys you're referencing aren't even here yet in the first place.

Why do you care what she says ? If your partner disrespects, ignores you, you cheats on you, calls you names and doesn't follow your lead, why do you care ?

Because culture has raised them to believe that they must care.

/u/BluepillProfessor wrote this up quite nicely on r/RPChristians: "Men are trained from birth to commit idolatry by pedastalizing women. Then at puberty and as teenagers with the horny hormones raging (when every other society in human history worked hard to marry them off) 90% are denied any type of relief and even denied most types of positive interactions with their female peers because they are interested in the "older boys" (aka riding the CC). It doesn't take a genius to figure out how early training combined with unique physical desperation at a uniquely vulnerable time in their life causes men to turn flawed creatures into Goddesses."

Act like you are single.

That's the meal ticket right there.

AWALT, but not all women are going to respond positively to your growth and development.

I'd be cautious here. This comes off as "red pill only works on women who are receptive to red pill." When a man changes women respond. That's pretty much a fact of life. Over time those changes are virtually always positive (subject to initial negative reactions). But they might not be to the degree necessary to meet the man's standards and expectations. To that end ...

The relationship might or might not be salvageable

This isn't an objective reality; it's a subjective conclusion. Either the wife decides this for the man by leaving him or the man decides it for himself by setting a standard and following through. When a guy starts improving, as your post is all about, it's virtually always the latter. As BPP notes in his podcast, a woman can't stand the thought of leaving a guy who is improving without her commanding him to do so. The "what might he have turned out to be?" question will haunt them forever, so they'll always wait and see. So, once a man starts improving, regardless of how far he is, the decision over whether or not the relationship is salvageable is his to make - and that's a highly subjective decision.

Holy crap my life is good now. I lived in a bad relationship for 10 years.

I'm confused ... is your life good because you escaped your ex? That sounds like some r/deadbedrooms nonsense. You list the answer, but then you make it sound in your conclusion like leaving your ex was really what saved you. "Get out of bad relationships" is often good advice, but nothing in your post comments on how any of your suggestions have improved your life ... except maybe that it's what gave you the balls to leave?

[–]man_in_the_worldRed Beret2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

This comes off as "red pill only works on women who are receptive to red pill." When a man changes women respond.

If you read his post history, you'll find that he never really changed, so she never responded. This reflects only his own experience giving up after sprinkling alpha didn't fix his marriage.

[–]Red-Curious0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Well ... that affirms my last paragraph then :p

[–]SteelSharpensSteelMod / Red Beret2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Pass me your Kool-Aid, Steve, I want a glass.

[–]BobbyPeru2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Lol

[–]ImSteveMcQueen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It isn't the Kool-Aid, it is the pill you take with it.

Holy fuck this stuff has changed my life.

[–]HLM341 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Work on you, everything else is a side affect.

[–]hystericalbonding1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

This post isn't for day 1 of MRP, but after a few months of lifting, leading, and owning your shit. Most of the guys who come here are the source of their own dissatisfaction. That's one of the purposes of the OYS threads. For most, it's only after a few months that he'll calm down and figure out if it's time to next his wife.

[–]outlawrp1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

+1. When you’ve tried and failed and kind of ignored some of the sidebar “that’s not for me, I’m good there” (you cocky little shit, read it ALL, speaking to myself here), then you need this. It’s just when you need it you don’t think you need it, until shit hits the fan. Glad I started posting in OYS, that’s how you progress.

[–]RuleZeroDADRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Hey mods, is this the metaphorical "photos from a beach" I always hear about?

[–]Flagfootball991 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Good post. I’m in the spirit of giving back too.

The key to your better future is YOU.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Shit... it’s Hiroshima in here. Steve just let off a RP bomb and blew the fuck out of askMRP. Sticky this shit for anyone about to ask a question!

[–]throwawaynumber8560 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I am confused by this post. Not sure where to start except to say that I’m getting mixed messages from it.

[–]CrippleSlap0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

A year ago I was where some of you are

Well fucking good for you. Not everyone is where you are now. So stop bitching.

[–]screechhaterRed Beret0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Good for you man. Keep writing about the good life. One of theses obtuse fuckers will catch on. Or, not

But, who knows. Just easier to spank it to milf porn or whatever ..... than to apply oneself, disconnecting and fully waking up

Lift, read. Lift, read, smile. Be attractive. Yup. Amazing how it all plays out

[–]470_2_700_nm0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

“Milf porn...”

I shit you not that triggered me - part of my brain lit up and said “go to the computer”.

Well fuck I may have been in deeper than I knew.

[–]Kosmoknots0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Easy for you to say. You're Steve McQueen!

[–]MikeMRP0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

OP: Why is your life so shit? What's wrong with you?

OP: My life is brilliant. Look at how good it is.

OP: My life used to be shit.

Mental monkey table tennis, Round 1.

[–]PeggedByOwlette0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Lifting is the success barrier for most men. Most guys are so far gone by 40, the second they get here and read that they have to go to the gym they slump down and give up. They tell themselves they are ok with the way things are.

You have to have a spark of alpha in you to actually change your lifestyle, and move past your comfort zone and go to the gym. It's the big equalizer. Even if you are rich as fuck and have a personal chef and Jon meadows himself following you around and training you, you still have to lift the weight, you still have to diet. Even with drugs, you are lifting more weight, and managing side effects. There is no shortcut.

It shows us who the betas truly are, they won't go, they always have an excuse. A man making excuses it's pretty much the most unattractive thing I can think of and considering my username that's saying a lot.

[–]ImSteveMcQueen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You are so friggin right.

Women are animals at their most primitive level when they are having sex. They need to be able to turn off their higher brain and get into their primitive brain to enjoy it. No matter how much of everything else the man has, women can't get to that place with a man they find physically unattractive.

I love the older sports car and muscle car guys. If they worked out as much as they spent $ and time on their cars they would be fit. But no, instead they try to impress the woman with their vehicles. The vehicle sits on the street or in the garage. It doesn't come with them into the bedroom. "Dad bods" are just something that women will put up with in exchange for finding a man to spend time with. "Dad bods" don't turn women on at any level.

I'm dating older women these days. I can't tell you how many times I've heard them tell me what a turn off a beer belly is and complain how few 40+ men take care of themselves. 90% of 45+ men are outright physically disgusting to most women.

[–]ImSteveMcQueen[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I can't emphasize lifting and fitness enough.

I think women are subconsciously passive aggressive. And they've been biologically programmed by nature for 10,000 years to select mates for their physical attributes.

So how do you think she feels when she is forced to pair up with a fat out of shape man in order to survive ? Do you think she is happy about that ? How do you think that plays out, consciously or subconsciously in ever single aspect of her life ?

I dated several great women in the last year. I'm fit. Every single one of these women, no matter how feminist, no matter how accomplished, no matter how academic, have told me what they think about out of shape men and their comments aren't kind at all. And their behaviours are even more telling.

I don't blame them for this. AWALT. It's their programming. Men have their programming, women have theirs. It is what it is. You know how the "game" works, use it to your advantage. 95% of middle aged men are totally out of shape and yet a fit man is what women want and crave. How much easier can it be ? What are you waiting for ? Get your diet under control and hit the gym.

[–]DeeMooreDeeMarriet0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

People care what women want?



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