How do you guys lead your wives to physical improvement? I have always been in relatively good shape. Played high school sports and continued to work out (weights and cardio) in and post college. I have been ripped and I have been chubby – but always working out in some capacity. While I am short (5’6), I am pretty muscular. People still sometimes ask if I played college football – so keeping the bulk alive. I was at my heaviest last year (at around 225) but got my ass in gear with MRP and have dropped @ 20lbs while adding more muscle (built like MJD).
The wife has been in and out of shape during our 20+ year relationship. She was slim when we met in college. Gained about 40lbs by year 5 of the marriage. She lost that weight, but only after I had already lost about 20lbs (follow the leader). But, now in our early 40’s and after two kids, she is back up to about 50lbs overweight. TBH, the actual weight does not bother me. A lot of the weight is in her boobs and ass (perfect for me). The problem is her overall health. She has had a multitude of health problems over the last 5yrs – some of which I think is tied to a bad diet and a sedentary lifestyle (not all but some).
So today I am working from home. I drop the hint that some day sex would be hot since we have the house with no kids. She responds by saying that the two of us are on different paths. She says that I am getting younger and acts/feel like I am 30. She says she is getting older and acts/feels like she is fifty. It’s basically a little LMR (I'm too “add in your custom excuse” for sex) which I plan on getting past. This is not the first time that this has come up as in the past she has referred to me a Benjamin Button. She says I am becoming a horny teenager while she is having a hard time keeping up. (FYI, I did recognize this as a comfort test and dealt with it as so).
So my wife sees what I do. She knows I lift. She knows I run. She knows I avoid grains. She knows that I do intermittent fasting. It’s not like it’s a fucking mystery why I am in better health. That being said, she typically rejects any advice I give on health, so I avoid giving any (at least since starting MRP). I will help when she ask.
Can she lift with me? No. I lift at my gym at work and she does not like weights. Can she run with me? Maybe, but she complains about shin splints. Can I help her eat healthier? Maybe. I do 80% of the cooking but I can’t make her eat what I eat. For example, I make a big pot of collards/kale every Sunday and eat a bowl for breakfast each day during the week (some of the healthiest stuff on earth). She won’t touch it.
While we are working on other things at this time, this will become an issue at some point. I want to be married to a physical match. I like to hike, bike, run and generally have adventures. When we do activities together outdoors, my wife struggles to keep up with me. Frequency of sex is another facet that suffers due to her overall health. I’d love to hear your thoughts on motivation. At this point maybe more dread is the answer, but she knows that my SMV is starting to surpass hers.