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Shit test passed...and I love her more???

by RedishPill | July 14, 2017 | askMRP

15 upvotes

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So my woman is leaving on a trip this weekend (left this morning actually), and was doing some packing last night. One of her 'tasks' was to create a music playlist on her phone using spotify for her girls trip. I tried to lay down with her for a bit after dinner and before the gym, but she was on her phone so I left to do some chores. I cam back 30 min later and she's still on her phone. I tell her to get ready for the gym as I change in front of her and she says "I'm almost done" (she was already in her gym clothes). I let her know she's been working on this for 30 min, and that we need to go to the gym. I go to the door, put my shoes on, grab my stuff and yell "I'll see you at the gym". She says "Just give me more time!". So I walk to the bathroom, have a pee, see her still sitting on the bed on her phone, so I walk out of the house and go to the car. She opens the window to say that "I can wait for her" or something along those lines so I chuckle and give her a "Chop chop!". I get in the car. I start the car. I sit in the car for 3 min (I know this because I was staring at the clock aha) and then I drove away.

I get a text while I'm in the gym parking lot about how she's pissed I left her, I'm a shitty person for starting a fight the night before she leaves, and a "See how well this works for you!". I text her back that I would love it if she joined me at the gym, and that we're doing legs! (It's her favourite). Then I put my phone away and go work out. Now, I'll be honest, I wasn't feeling the greatest in the gym at first, but the longer I was in there, I just started to feel good about setting a boundary (When I say I'm going, I'm going) and I felt like a man who was operating from his own frame and, surprisingly, I wasn't mad at her?! I felt so good, that I was actually happy to go home and be with my woman after I was done in the gym, despite the events of the last two hours. Normally I mentally hate her for a few hours after we fight or something, but this time felt much different.

When I got home I pretended as if nothing had happened, talked about my sore legs, and for the most part she was talkative and normal, though you could tell she wasn't 100%. When she mentioned me leaving her in non-direct ways, why am I so mean to her, I just ignored her etc. I made mention of "Maybe you'll move a little quicker next time" once when she asked me directly about it, but that was it. Then I boned her twice this morning before she left for her trip.

So....is this "I feel good" thing from operating in my own frame? Because I like it, and it's the first time she's gotten angry and my response wasn't anger and thoughts of "Why am I with you?".


Post Information
Title Shit test passed...and I love her more???
Author RedishPill
Upvotes 15
Comments 8
Date 14 July 2017 06:16 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/205875
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/6natz6/shit_test_passedand_i_love_her_more/
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Comments

[–]InChargeManRed Beret8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

Isn't it amazing how deep in the rabbit hole a guy can get, where just the thought of leaving without her wouldn't cross your mind. Nice work, this wasn't being Rambo, she had a shit-ton of warning.

In my house I have a secret code for when people have to do things. We will either leave "around 5" or "5pm SHARP". Apparently it was somewhat tricky to understand, but after a couple of times like your post my wife (and kids) have cracked the code.

[–]UEMcGillI am become McGill, Destroyer of Blue Pill7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

It's outcome independence. You've set a boundary and stuck to it. My wife does that shit too. We'll be at a party and I'm like "I'm ready to go" and I get the 'just one minute'. If it's in the neighborhood, I just leave. If it's far away I'll get an Uber or if it's late and the kids are involved I'll tell her to catch a ride or Uber. The first time my wife got upset at me and I asked her why she was. I didn't really care why she was I just wanted to drive the point home namely we're not connected at the hip and of she's not ready I'm cool with that but it's a modern world and we can get home in any manner of ways.

You feel good because you weren't a slave to her approval or emotions.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

"I feel good" thing from operating in my own frame?

I don't know, is it? You will obviously feel that a burden has been lifted when you do things without the constant need to worry about someone else's approval. But I've also experienced the sensation before that "Whew, I'm glad I'm back with her...the stress of me being away and wondering how she felt was uncomfortable." If it's this feeling, kill it.

[–]RedishPill[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Its been a few days since, and the burden still feels like it's been lifted.

[–]BluepillProfessorMod / Red Beret1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

This is what it feels like to be a man, to lead by example, and to do what you want, when you want. She was time whoring you and treating you like a subordinate. You can ignore it, get mad, or stay happy and let her do what she wants while you do what you want. The Red Pill Alpha man chooses the latter.

[–]RedishPill[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

or stay happy and let her do what she wants while you do what you want

This is it. This is where the happiness came from.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

You have issues with your boundaries.

You know why she drags out her time, making you wait? Because you let her.

You waited for her three separate times to drop her fucking phone.

Also, WTF would you reply to a text or phone call when you're AT THE FUCKING GYM?!?!?

Be at the gym. Be present. Stop fingerfucking your phone. She knows she did wrong, she just got validated by you answering her text.

The," Maybe you'll move quicker" quip was a bit bitchy. ACT, don't speak. Leave if she's delaying. Condition her that when you say go, you're going and she needs to get on the train or be left behind.

You sound new, so this probably comes off as harsh. I'm trying to illustrate that even though your fog is lifting, your voyage is still long. Keep grinding. Be responsible for yourself.

[–]class_starts_now-2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy

You weren't mad at her because you treated her worse than she treated you. Neither of you like how the other treats you. Just laying more bricks on the road to divorce. Why wait? Set her free.



You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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