I'm sitting at a crossroad in my current relationship wondering how to proceed.
I'm late 40s, fit, financially sound, 2 younger children married for 8 years. I've been reading, getting fit, passing shit tests, etc. I've got a good set of friends, interesting hobbies, etc.
I'm totally unplugged. I'm far along the dread path, though I haven't applied a lot of pressure (yet). Problem is, I'm not sure I even care about my first mate anymore.
The only thing I need a woman for anymore is sexual fulfillment and maybe a bit of companionship. I have a completely good life on my own. I can raise the kids on my own. I'm happy, I'm free, I'm self sufficient.
As soon as I spend time with my 1st mate there are shit tests and complaining and drama. Frankly I'm just plain tired of it. I understand AWALT, but I also think that married first mates take license of the situation that a plate would not.
I'm not happy with my first mate. I don't like how she prioritizes her time, I'm not sexually attracted to her anymore and quite frankly I could do way better if I left her. Not sure if it is me or it is a general RP thing, but I don't find I get a lot from my 1st mate. She isn't my cheerleader. She isn't really affectionate or loving. She doesn't have a well defined feminine side and has no interest in developing one. Maybe this is why I don't find myself very bonded to her.
Of course the argument comes up that I should lead her better. I agree that I could build her into a somewhat better person, but I question how far this could go. Can't change people's stripes and all that. I'm also a bit peeved that she doesn't have more personal initiative to make things better on her own. Hours spent on children and career are infinite. Hours spent making the relationship better, working on herself ? Zero. Literally.
All this has me questioning what the best path is for a desirable male later in life. Why exactly do I need to remain in a relationship with this woman if she isn't my ideal mate ? Frankly I don't see a lot of good/happy times with in the future due to some of her ideologies and her impending health issues. I've got better things to do with my time than listen to her victim puke.
So what happens if we divorce ? I get a place of my own and I have the kids half time. I'm happy with that. What do I do for sex and companionship ? Spin plates for the rest of my life ? Enter into a LT dating type relationship ?
Will I encounter some of the issues I currently have with my 1st mate ? Maybe, probably. Will they be as bad ? I highly doubt it, due to a number of factors.
Thoughts ? Who has made this decision and how did it turn out ?
Edit: maybe the problem is that somewhere along my RP journey women lost value in my eyes, to the point that they have very little. In fact, about the only things I think they provide are a mother figure to the children and sex. Has anyone else encountered this ? Ironically this would inflame the feminists, but maybe that is why we have MGTOW and how the feminist loop gets extinguished in the long run ?