Been married to the wife for 5 years. Typical white knight beta fag. Thought I could save my wife from her terrible life style and life choices.
Looking back know I realize that I missed a shit ton of red flags. My wife had crushing credit card debt from being irresponsible in college. She lived like someone from an episode of hoarders. And she went raw dog with me on our second date. But, I overlooked all thus because she fucked better than a pornstar. And I thought I could help her change.
Fast forward a few years. We got married. Bought our first house. And shit was really great. Had sex all of the time and both the wife and I were into lifting. She accepted my finial advice and consolidated her debt.
I fucked up by agreeing to have a kid with her. I doubted she could handle the extra responsibility but I wanted too make her happy. She swore up and down that she wouldnt get fat and would make our sex life a priority. After the kid was born things instantly changed. Shocker.
Our boy had a severe reflux issue and couldn't sleep without being propped up. This lead to him co-sleeping with my wife. And I moved to the downstairs bedroom because I'm 6'3 and I did not want to crush my son in my sleep.
I lived in exile downstairs for 10 months. The wife and I work different shifts so we rarely see each other. We had sex maybe twice during that time. I grew butthurt and depressed. Started snapping at my wife like a bitch. And she spiraled and became more and more negative. In my depression I stopped lifting and checked out of my marriage. I played video games and drank. I got fat. Truly pathetic shit.
When my son turned a year and a half I got a message on Facebook from another man's wife. She had discovered some messages and pictures between my wife and her husband. She had been sex messaging this guy for 4 months. Like hundreds of pictures.
This was literally the worst day in my life. I had been hoping that things would just go back to the way they were with my wife and her she was being set for someone else. I did not see this coming.
I confronted the wife, screamed at her. And we started therapy. I started lifting again and i discovered the red pill. Started strong lifts 5x5 and have made it to the gym 4 days a week for the past 6 months. She seemed genuinely remorseful but I couldn't get over the fact that she cheated. That she is an oath breaking liar.
I do the petty thing and I throat fucked a 21 year old chick in our house while my wife was gone for the weekend. I am 33. I also picked up a single 41 year old mom while working out and fucked her in the ymca shower room.
This made me feel better at first. Of course my wife finds out about this. Turns oit shes been spying on my phone since we stared dating.
A couple weeks pass of us talking about this shit in therapy. Then, I get another message from a different dudes wife.
Turns out my wife didn't have just 1 affair. But 2. And this one was much more serious. She sucked this guy's cock while my son slept upstairs.
I want to salvage this marriage because the thought of not seeing my son everyday fucking kills me. Also, my wife was diagnosed with BPD and if we split I don't trust her to not end up with some Nuttball psycho and have him be around my son. Not to mention divorce rape.
I've been lifting. And the last few months I've started holding frame. It took me over a year of trying to really get it thou.
I have forgiven my wife in that I'm not throwing it in her face. But I don't trust her as far as I can throw her. After writing this the answer is pretty obvious now but I will ask anyway. What can I do to fix this abortion? Is this even salvable?