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FR - Main event & on my way out

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[deleted]
January 30, 2017
12 upvotes

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Title FR - Main event & on my way out
Author
Upvotes 12
Comments 42
Date 30 January 2017 02:35 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/206573
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/5qy2f8/fr_main_event_on_my_way_out/
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Comments

[–]Alpha_Rising3 points4 points  (12 children) | Copy

She sounds mentally ill. Has she gone to a psychiatrist?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

She's sounds like a normal woman that's not attracted and not afraid of losing her lifestyle.

[–]smidevaek8 points9 points  (7 children) | Copy

Are you ready to give up on just this marriage or on MRP altogether? I'm asking because to me you seem still stuck in her frame (e.g. describing her unwillingness to have sex with you as "shame issues that aren't going away" rather than "she's not attracted to me") and the build-up to what you call your "Main Event" (but really just seems like the point when you decided you've had enough) is lacking. Why doesn't your FR show any sign that you are actually able to use fogging, A&A, AM rather than just DEERing and STFU? What makes you think you will do better in a new relationship? I could be wrong, but I get the sense that you haven't made as much progress as you think. Where's your game?

I wouldn't blame you for cutting your losses and starting over with a new woman who hasn't seen you as her beta bitch for years, but just don't kid yourself that you've truly implemented MRP with this one if all you've really done is enter the anger phase and start covertly contracting with her that she really ought to fuck you now that you're lifting and learning to STFU.

[–]trp_dude1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

No, I disagree. He's blaming her refusal to show herself on shame issues. Separate issue from sex.

She's using sex as a weapon. She doesn't realize he's ready and capable of leaving.

The problem here is that OP has never dialed in the dread. He's not even at level 6/7. His wife doesn't know how precarious her position is.

OP, if you're ready to pull the trigger, go for it. Lord knows you will upgrade big time. But let me tell you what's going to happen. As soon as she realizes you're serious about the divorce, she will turn into your personal slut and porn star. She will start dancing for you naked in broad daylight. She will eagerly swallow. Just be prepared is all I'm sayin.

[–]ReddJiveRed Beret6 points7 points  (11 children) | Copy

ok hold on

Im not buying this bullshit.

how the fuck do you do this for 2 years and still yet fail a simple shit test? and she's throwing things at you? that just doesn't happen.

how is it after 2 years this is the first we've even heard of you?

it looks like you Just ran down our checklist of things to improve. Gave yourself an A on all the subjects and somehow...she's just a bitch.

now it is true that sometimes people are shitty and they aren't going to get it. But damn i don't see shit from you here. you don't even have the guts to respect the men working here with a real user id. Just some throw away bullshit. Get your validation and move on.

[–]trp_dude2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

No, I think he's real. He never showed her real dread. In her eyes, his SMV is still low.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Got to bottom comment, scrolled up to reply but something caught my eye and told me to go read it. Glad I did. I gotta start conditioning my time based on post history again.

[–]ReddJiveRed Beret1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

read it. i pull guys post history before i do reply. Mainly to see where they post on reddit and how much time they've put into MRP

im not faulting him for wanting to leave a shitty person. We all have them and need to purge them if they aren't providing value. Im doing that myself and my snowflake is on the list.

still to use a throw away? Post here about all this Did he want validation over his plan? that he was a good soldier and did everything he could but the girl just can't see it right?

i am more about mens mindset the internal process. we have tons here about gaming and kino and women yet that is external. i don't see that internal work here. Plenty of educated rich men have fucked up the world. Doesn't make you special .

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Meh, could be. I lurked here for over a year before I got the guts to post, and when I did I got shat on so hard, I still get whiffs of it from time to time.

If it's legit, I'd like to see how he does going forward. If it's BS, he's pathetic in a way that life itself is a punishment.

[–]ReddJiveRed Beret0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

and it s because your word can't be taken for granted. Anyone can talk the talk here.

i myself was called out on it once. Really i thought i was providing value to what i knew already. I came to see it differently. If you want to add value you have to go through the mill.

guys like pook, jack10ofhearts, and ultimate cad are rare. And so far we've had 3 guys claiming long term process only for it to blow up. Sorry. I don't buy it.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

If you want to add value you have to go through the mill.

I like this. It's funny how some of the most valuable things I've received from MRP are from the comments.

[–]Sapphire_Jizz3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Congrats on making the right choice.

Keep us updated with your progress, let us know how the divorce plays out, etc.

Good luck.

[–]Aaren_Augustine1 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy

I'm curious. If you had to describe yourself when you two first met, how would it go?

[–]470_2_700_nm2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

This sounds like a fucking mess for you.

There are men on this sub, hopefully who have been through this, who can help you find your way.

Good luck, great job with your self improvement, too bad she can't come along.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Good on you for making a tough decision. Divorce with kids can be a quagmire. Once you start, don't stop. Don't feel sorry for her. Don't let others around you shame you. Make up your mind and do what you need to with iron resolve. I went through through this shit on my own years ago and it sucks. PM myself or some of the others here if you need to when it gets difficult.....because it's going to get difficult.

Having said that, as with most difficult things, it was worth it.

[–]man_in_the_worldRed Beret0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

I doubt that we're getting the full story here.

Progressing for 18 months. ... I calmly come in to calm everyone down. ... This turns into my wife throwing something at me (missing) and then texting me things like "get the fuck out" and "back the fuck off" among others. ... I'm calm, she's livid. ... Since then - Hard no and rejection 100% of the time for almost 4 months now.

Maybe she's nuts ... But my guess is that OP has either

Why do I think OP's frame is lacking?

I've been really focused for almost 18 months.

Hard no and rejection 100% of the time for almost 4 months now.

Yet

New throwaway. Posted to MRP but there is a 3 day wait.

What's the fucking hurry to get our validation right now? Why does someone 18 months in need emergency validation, anyway? Sure doesn't sound like solid frame to me; my guess is that OP has some fundamental misconception(s) about frame, has been behaving incongruously or autistically, and this so-called "main event" was the final straw when she gave up on him and checked out.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

yeah, it's so hard to assess the guy's frame. My guess is emotionless retard. But if she's always been weird about sex, that's not likely to change

[–]man_in_the_worldRed Beret1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

My guess is emotionless retard.

Mine, too. I was triggered by the "calmly ... calm" in the same sentence.

I can imagine a day in the Throwaway household, fogging and withdrawing from any emotional engagement whatsoever like its a shit test, even when it has nothing to do with him ...

Her: "My mom called me at 2:30 to tell me she needed me to come pick her up and take her to the mechanic to get her car back at 3. I'm really annoyed at her; she's known about this for two days, but only tells me at the last minute and ruins my schedule."

Him: "I can understand that you found this irritating. However, I am not responsible for your emotions."

Her: "I never said you were responsible for my emotions! I just want a little empathy from you when I vent about something that upset me."

Him: "I agree that you never said I was responsible for your emotions. What makes you feel that I have no empathy when you vent?"

Her: "You seem so emotionally disconnected these days, like you were replaced by a robot."

Him: "I realize that you feel that I am emotionally disconnected. In what ways do I seem robotic to you?"

Her: "THIS! THIS! You're talking like a robot!"

Him: "Yes, I am a robot from Mars! I have been sent to attract human females and fuck them!" (Does a little robot dance) "Let's go to the bedroom right now."

Her: "That's not funny. Having sex with you right now is the last thing in the world I would want to do, you fucking IDIOT!"

Him: "I understand that you didn't find that funny. I'm not interested in continuing this conversation until you calm down. I'm going to the gym now."

Her: "You fucking asshole! You told the kids you would take them to the playground this evening."

Him: (Disappears)

Him later to himself: "Let's see how I did ... fog, fog/negative inquiry, fog, A&A and escalate, OI/fog, Dread Level 4 withdrawing time and attention; I crushed that shit test! A+!"

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

You set this mess up. Own it before you run off, Peter Pan.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Divorce her. Your happiness is paramount.

[–]BobbyPeru0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Having a 3rd kid is just her way of locking in her SAHM status for another decade.

[–]2235520 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Hey mate, I am VERY new to red pill, only discovered it about 1-2 months ago.... In this short period I learned enough to agree with the other people about your frame... You are still blaming/rationalizing her behavior, You SETTLED for poor sex (why would she give you anything else, if you take the scraps...), you didn't set boundaries and made it clear what the consequences of them being broken are ( you let her throw something at you, and abuse you 4 months ago, and still there asking for sex???)

I have no doubt that some marriages will not work, and I may be in one myself, and some women are just too crazy, but you will carry same issue into your next relationship, and will start settling for things that you don't like, and you know how the rest goes....

I wish you best of luck.

[–]weakandsensitive0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Why the fuck do you care about money? It's just money. At best it's a symptom, not a cause. Figure out what the problem is, then find your solution.

You're doing more fuckarounditis bullshit. 4 month, christ. I don't even care about your bullshitting your progress. It's the lack of self respect that triggers me.



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