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Girlfriend's new coworker is a God amongst men

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July 26, 2016

My girl and I have been together for about 10 years. For most of that time I've been pretty beta. Insecure, whiny, jealous, butthurt, all that good stuff. That all changed 2 or 3 years ago when I found the red pill. Things have been great and are currently better than ever. This shit really works as long as you aren't a complete social retard and are at least midly self-aware.

For almost our entire relationship my gf has worked at jobs that primarily cater to women, so her co-workers and customers have been exclusively women or gay men. I haven't had to worry too much about other dudes she spends time with, not that I should anyway, but blue pill me would have imploded.

However she recently changed jobs and now works with basically the perfect human male specimen. She was talking about her new job over dinner and begins talking about this guy like "oh yea, there's this guy I work with who is super hot and every girl there is obsessed with him." I laugh a little because I don't really give a fuck. There's always going to be someone better than me and if she wants to leave me for him, so be it. That's life and no point crying about it. Honestly, I figured the guy was only OK looking and she was just shit testing me about it, but I stopped by a few days later and holy shit, this dude is amazing. 6'5, handsome as hell face, jacked as a mother fucker, from eastern Europe so he's redpill as fuck and he has a sweet accent. I have nothing but respect for this guy and harbor no ill will about the whole thing. I also take it as a good sign that my girl told me, instead of saying nothing. If I was still beta she wouldn't have said shit because I would have freaked the fuck out, so at least I have that going for me I guess.

However I find myself slipping back into some old beta habits. Just feeling down, worrying about if they're hitting it off or whatever. I know she is AWALT, and I have a pretty good abundance mentality, but I would prefer not to completely lose frame and turn into an insecure bitch every time she mentions the guy or whatever. I'd like to keep her around as long as I can and don't want to fuck it up by mate guarding or getting insecure about it.

So I'm just wondering if there's any other guys on here whose women work, or spend a good amount of time with guys that are just way "better" than them. Obviously looks aren't everything, and having tight game and a good personality help, but let's be honest, most guys who are as built and attractive as this guy also have good game and personality, so that will only go so far.

Again, I really don't give a fuck either way, but I'd prefer to not push my girl away by having a weak frame or getting caught up in a negative headspace when she tells me something funny this dude said, or about how every girl there wants to suck his dick off.

Any advice? Is not giving a fuck the only thing I can do? I'm lifting and getting in better shape every day, but I started a few years ago, whereas this dude looks like he has been shoveling Romanian coal since he was in diapers.

Any thoughts on boundries? If they all go out for drinks or whatever after work, what's appropriate and what's not? Should I ask to come along or does that seem clingy and weird? I'm just getting caught up in my own head over this tall handsome ubermensch and need a slap back to reality.

Thanks bros.

Post Information
Title Girlfriend's new coworker is a God amongst men
Author cholomite
Upvotes 12
Comments 52
Date 26 July 2016 06:00 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/207292
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/4upzi8/girlfriends_new_coworker_is_a_god_amongst_men/
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Red Pill terms found in post:
butthurtbetaabundanceAWALTframeshit testliftgamethe red pill

[–]UEMcGillI am become McGill, Destroyer of Blue Pill[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (3 children) | Copy

Oh hey, this thread has been crossposted. So maybe voting is affected? I doubt it, as /r/thebluepill is really losing a lot of its zeal. Maybe they'll get back to their old self but until they get done bashing /r/incels don't get your hopes up.

[–][deleted] 19 points20 points  (15 children) | Copy

Nice Bromance you've developed. If you had the opportunity you should have introduced yourself and viewed this man as a peer.

Moments like these show how far you have to go.

So I'm just wondering if there's any other guys on here whose women work, or spend a good amount of time with guys that are just way "better" than them

And this my friend is why I know you have not internalized the pill.

How many times have I talked about Irrational Limitless Self Confidence it is the fucking elixir of masculinity. When you can meet this fucking masculine dude, be glad you have another Man to converse or interact with (if thats how it plays out) or let it be nothing in your mind.

Your worry shows you have not been lifting enough, working on nutrition, exhibiting masculine traits, or any of the shit we talk about here.

You are afraid to lose you girl instead of her being afraid to lose you. Stop saying AWALT and ABUNDANCE MENTALITY as you don't have these things.

Again, I really don't give a fuck either way

You do.

If this were me, no fucking way my girl would be going out with dudes for drinks. Jacked or not that's not how we role.

I would have no issue with my wife working with Fabio, but I would ensure when I was at her work I made it a point to meet this dude and ensure he also recognized that she isn't married to a pathetic puke.

Men recognize men, this is a fact. You aren't a masculine man and it's clear your physical and mental fitness are not up to standard.

[–]rpnow11 points12 points  (1 child) | Copy

not how we role

This is genius if this pun is intentional.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

I was hoping someone caught that. It was a typo at first, then I read it and thought my god...it's perfect

[–]cholomiteMod / BP Downvote Magnet[S] 2 points3 points  (12 children) | Copy

Thanks, I think I'm in love.

You're right though, I should view this guy as a peer instead of some super man. I just think of how far I've gotten and how much hard work it has taken, and this guy is just like a natural who does it with ease. I couldn't help but be impressed. I guess it's time to reread the 48 laws of power.

My intention when I stopped by was to get free food and hopefully talk to this guy and connect man to man, but he was doing other shit and I didn't want to chase him down like a weirdo. I'll shake his hand when I do meet him and hopefully not pop a boner.

I do need to flip on who is worrying about losing who. You're right about me worrying about losing her instead of the other way around. That was a slap in the right direction.

Thanks man.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (10 children) | Copy

this guy is just like a natural who does it with ease

That's how it should always appear to everyone. I deadlift and squat my ass off, it fucking hurts being sore all of the time but I Love the pain. Regardless, when it comes time for me to pick my girl up and spin her around like a fit and natural alpha, you don't see the work - you see the results.

I just think of how far I've gotten and how much hard work it has taken

You're intimidated by this guy.

I guess it's time to reread the 48 laws of power

You read it once and it did nothing, it's time start shifting your mentality man. The books don't do shit if you can't apply the concepts to the real world.

I'll shake his hand when I do meet him and hopefully not pop a boner.

I don't know the work situation so obviously, if it makes sense to interact - do so. If not, just make your presence known, and not like a fucking douche bag or you come across as needy. I don't know how else to say it except, be a fucking man.

I do need to flip on who is worrying about losing who. You're right about me worrying about losing her instead of the other way around. That was a slap in the right direction.

Mentally yes, but there are no actions to take. You don't punish your wife because a sexy dude works with her. You don't raise dread on her because you are insecure.

You said you've been doing this for years, I do not understand why you are not rocking a strong mind and a strong body at this point.

Stop half assing this.

I said this dude was a peer, but he isn't he is better than you because he isn't worried about you yet you are bringing him home in your head. You should think that this dude saw you and realized he should watch his hands and mouth around your woman - that, is irrational and limitless self confidence

[–]cholomiteMod / BP Downvote Magnet[S] 0 points1 point  (9 children) | Copy

That last part is sort of what I'm getting caught up on. How do I not give a fuck, but at the same time project an image that he shouldn't want to get in between me and my girl? I guess I should just work more on truly not giving a fuck if he wants to get between me and her. Let her chase me or leave her behind for someone better.

Also, it would be great if he looked at me and instantly feared getting involved with her, but the plain facts are that this guy would mostly likely crush me in a physical confrontation, no amount of self belief or body language will change that. I'm getting bigger and stronger every day, but I will not likely ever instill fear in this guy, not that I even really want to.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (6 children) | Copy

Dude, /u/stonepimpletilists left you an excellent response, so I will just add to what I hope you've already internalized from his points.

I am 5'8" - that's not very tall. But I walk like I'm a fucking giant. Not obnoxiously or like an arrogant silver back gorilla, what I mean is my eyes are forward, my back is straight, hands a little outward, shoulders back, and always a smile on my face.

If I met your 6'5" purebred from Algeria I'd walk right up, smile, shake his hand, maintain eye contact, and crack a joke about how he finds a way to fit his frame behind a desk.

I would immediately acknowledge his size comparison and ensure he knew I felt no intimidation from it. Bringing it to light makes it easy, hiding from it makes it a 'thing' that remains unspoken.

From there, I'd want him on my side, like Stone said, masculine men like other masculine men. It's such a rare thing to find another man that when it happens, you respect that.

This dude could help you with chicks, he could help you with travel, he could help you with lifting, is he is as squared away as you say, he could help you improve your 'self'. That's what men do, they help one another.

You are worried, intimidated, and idolizing him like he is your Cory Worthington.

Fuck that, the dude could probably crush me but I'll be damned if I don't go down swinging like a spider monkey on cocaine.

If your girl finds this dude to be worth swinging to, fuck it get the divorce and give him tips on how to make her scream while you find something new and be awesome doing that thing.

Life is easy and fun, stop worrying and fucking Man Up.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

Funny, I'm 174cm as well.

Friends wives hate our 6'7 friend. They have to clean above the fridge every time he comes over lol

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy


[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

He may think he's alpha, jokes on him. I leave random heavy sharp objects hanging from the ceiling.

Only a matter of time, then

look at me, I am the alpha now

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

getting a ladder to put them up is sooo beta

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Spouse found my ladder, now she shit tests me

what do internet?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

theredpillroom post on the male social matrix.

Just because you lost a fight, doesn't mean you lose heirarchy. In fact, most guys will back off and respect a man who is willing to defend his territory.

Granted, with women, the dynamic changes, but the underlying principle is the same

[–]KyfhoMyoba0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

but at the same time project an image that he shouldn't want to get in between me and my girl?

He is not the problem, nor is he ever the problem. Your girl and her perception of you is the problem.

You have to take the focus off of him and on to her. Up the Dread Game. Make sure that she sees you with other women and that they show interest in you. Let her know in experiential terms that you can replace her.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

For all you know he pedastlizes women. Your assumption that he's "Red Pill as fuck " by dent of his ethnic heritage is just that .. an assumption. Don't focus on his traits -focus on making yourself a confident self contained man. Despite a man being short - he can still be confident and strong.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

TFA and Stone gave you some good answers, but keep something in mind.


you don't know his insecurities, his weaknesses. He is just a man. He has plenty of problems in his life and I am sure there are things he thinks he could be better at.

Point being, Do not be afraid or intimidated by the image he generated in your mind.

Actually, don't be afraid.

Fear IS the mind killer.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (18 children) | Copy

I laugh a little because I don't really give a fuck

We have something in common... the laughing I mean. I actually don't give a fuck about him, it would be best if you own your faggot jealousy and say you give a fuck, but pretend you don't. PROTIP, Alphas engage and befriend other alphas. Betas seethe and worry. Take a wild guess where you lie on the spectrum?

If she's going to jump his cock, there's nothing you can do about it. If she leaves and you're alone at home for an extended period of time jerking off with no pings from Tinder/Bumble? That's something you can do something about.

We've all been in that place of wanting to mate guard. It's a deep, dark whole of shit, coming from a position of insecurity. Oddly enough, if she does step out of line, it's the same place that allows you to hamster all kinds of behaviour as 'acceptable' when it really isn't.

There's nothing of note here, stop being a pussy, man up, and maybe this guy and you can go out for drinks later, he can tell you about the hot chicks he fucks on the regular, give you some tips

[–]cholomiteMod / BP Downvote Magnet[S] 1 point2 points  (17 children) | Copy

Solid points. Thanks for the bitch slap. I'll invite him out for an American beer if I get the chance.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (16 children) | Copy

I said befriend him, not insult the man.

Cant you at least find a warm bucket of piss to share instead?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (15 children) | Copy

Well, its not like its an invitation to watch hockey...


[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (14 children) | Copy

It's a baseball stadium I live beside now, not hockey

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (13 children) | Copy

Play ball. Can't be long and the difference between a pitcher and a catcher will elude you no longer. No pepper. Lol

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (12 children) | Copy

Well - he will probably sit behind the catcher anyway

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (11 children) | Copy

No doubt lol. Kvetching all the time how they don't sell Chardonnay

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (10 children) | Copy

Oy vey. Enough with the kvetching already. I'd be upset too if I was cold all year

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (9 children) | Copy

True. True. We can't really expect much when a dude chooses to live in a provincial backwater like that, snow on the ground all year long etc.. Lol

[–]IASGame0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

First point is, your idea that guys as good looking as him also have good game is bullshit and dispelled (by stuff like RSD videos) often enough. There are some, and maybe this particular guy from Eastern Europe is fairly Red Pill with tight game.

From your own post it seems you still have a bit of One-itis left, you state it as a "preference" of "keep her around as long" as you can and such, but it reveals you haven't really managed to break out into the "it's just your turn" mentality. If she does go, you probably can get a better/younger one. At least that is what you need to believe as well.

Is your LTR even the hottest woman at work? Even if the guy may want to have sex with her, it is not so likely that he would LTR her, particularly if he is RP and has game. Presumably your LTR knows this.

[–]cholomiteMod / BP Downvote Magnet[S] 0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

True, there are some physically good looking guys with bad game, but this guy is not one of them.

You're right about having a little oneitis. I guess I still have a few fucks to give. I gotta completely let go and live and let live.

I'd say she is top 5 hotness, but there's definitely competition. She's been getting hotter and hotter everyday, just like I have though.

[–]IASGame0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Not just some, most good looking guys have crap game apparently, and not all "Naturals" are good looking either.

When you say she's been getting hotter and hotter everyday, you mean since the change of job and being around the coworker?

Just try to enjoy the benefits. If she is coming horny from work, initiate and give her great sex. You can't (and shouldn't want to) control her fantasies, get all you can out of the situation.

"Buying temperature" is transferable. Just don't ask me how to do it as I don't know!

[–]cholomiteMod / BP Downvote Magnet[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

No, she's been getting hotter for the past few years. She's been pretty on board with my changes. I'd be writing an entirely different post if she started hitting the gym after meeting this guy.

I get that buying temperature is transferable, but how do you not let it fuck with your head that some other dude was the one she's getting hot for and not feel like she's just settling for you at the end of the day?

[–]IASGame0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Honestly, at this stage...

If my wife branch swung over the board to a better guy that would give her kids (which apparently she wants), I think I'd be genuinely happy for her and just go learn game and never marry again.

If she just cheated on me I'd just divorce her and forget about the sunk costs, go learn game, and never marry again.

And even if she improves a lot but I'm still long distance, I probably should just divorce her, go learn game, and never marry again. It is just that in this third situation I apparently don't (yet?) have the balls to pull it off.

[–]alphabeta49Red Beret0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Again, I really don't give a fuck either way... Again, I really don't give a fuck either way... Again, I really don't give a fuck either way... Again, I really don't give a fuck either way... Again, I really don't give a fuck either way... Again, I really don't give a fuck either way... Again, I really don't give a fuck either way...

Keep telling yourself that.

Not lying to yourself that you feel intimidated is the first step.

Beyond that, listen to TFA.

[–]cholomiteMod / BP Downvote Magnet[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Good points. I guess what I should be saying is that I know I'd be fine in the end, but I'd still be a little butthurt if she bailed on me for him. Thanks for calling me out on that.

[–]alphabeta49Red Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Good work.

[–]IASGame0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Just remembered something else:

Back when he was still posting, Il-est described that his deceased wife used to have a huge crush for a kids' sports trainer. He was completely unfazed by it, apparently.

The example I remember was during a game, he went to her from behind and whispered in her ear making fun of her, stuff like "Oh yeah you really want him don't you - tell you what if you go hang around him and be nice he may even let you blow his whistle".

He probably managed to transfer part of that "buying temperature" into himself with that clever usage of game.

If you can muster it up, that is the kind of thing you can pull off.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

That one was awesome, he just teased her on it.

"I bet you want to fuck him real bad dont you?" or somesuch.

was pretty damned good AM

[–]ZeeyardSA0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

And here I am encouraging my wife to smile at the "Old dude" that she has been checking out at the gym!!!!

[–]Griever1140 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

TFA covered most of this but I will just reinforce something you said so that you really internalize it:

"This is just your turn on her cock carousel."

She will stick around if you stop being a bitch and follow the plan.

[–]Big_Daddy_PDX0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I'm always surprised at how many people talk about how "I used to be blue pill, now I'm Alpha" and then go on to explicitly demonstrate their Blue Pill tendencies.

You don't tell her not to do it. You tell her "it's a good idea (to have drinks w/ some single guy that all the "over girls" are into) because you've been wanting a reason to finally grab drinks w/ that cutie from the gym - you know, the one with the great hair and flat stomach? The one all the other guys want to bang" It's an alka seltzer dread move that will nearly hit her immediately.

You can't control them so stop thinking you do.

[–]SorcererKingMod / Red Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

cholo, cholo, cholo. You've come too far to regress on us.

TFA has it right: mark this guy as an equal, not a superior. And as for your girl, she can pine all she wants, but if Chad-anovich there is such a catch, what makes you think he wants anything to do with a bunch of 6's and 7's he works with? In other words, is he RP as fuck (in which case he knows better than to shit where he eats and probably bangs 8+ 20-something chicks) or is he some thirsty beta after anything in a skirt?

Your fears are lame. Get some OI. Sounds like you're a little too comfy after 10 years.

[–]dandar46000 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

If he wants to nail her and she wants his D than he will nail her. No matter if you're insecure or irrationally confident. Worry about things under your control. Only thing you can do is to have a plan in place for if/when something like that happens and you find out about it.

About boundaries, I'd think you already have those established after 10 years of marriage. If she crosses them you know you can plate hotter chicks than she is if you're on your own. Have some abundance mentality. If she fucks him and you find out, it's her loss.

[–]CrazyTom540 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Again, I really don't give a fuck either way

You say you don't give a fuck but you made a long post about this one guy. You are clearly insecure about him and are worried that he will steal your girl. Don't lie to us m8

[–]anotherswingingdick0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

she's not the only one who can insult a partner by dis-respecting the relationship.

[–]KyfhoMyoba0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Remember this always:

Beta males mate guard, alpha males disregard.

Peruse the posts and comments of YaReally on therationalmale.com. I think he's also got a website.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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