This is an obvious throwaway, and an embarassing admission. I need an ass whooping.
Wife and I have been together 5 years, married three years. The first year sex was amazing and constant, but then we had three kids in four years. Over the course of the past four years we have had sex a half dozen times.
Swallowed the pill about three months ago. Killing it in the gym (lost 25lbs, loads more to go, but my SMV is considerably higher than it has been). Killing it at work too. I fucked up with my wife by talking about "upcoming changes" early on, but I've been doing a great job with STFU and being cocky, funny and lighthearted since. I took up old hobbies again that get me out of the house a bit more. I'm fixing shit around the house before she even knows that shit needs to get fixed. I shaved off a prematurely gray beard, bought some cowboy jeans and am finally starting to give my wife tingles.
After all this work of creating a new frame (really almost a new persona entirely), she finally got horny enough to fuck yesterday. I built it up for hours with flirting, kino, etc. Then, dammit, I fell asleep on the couch watching the GOP debate.
When I woke up, she was already in bed asleep with our two month old next to her. I crawled in bed next to her, got her horny (will spare the details, not necessary) and went in for the fuck.
Then, damn. One thrust and done. Nothing I could have done to prevent it. I was just ... done.
So all that work I have done to become cocky, funny, lighthearted ... really someone that others want to be around ... just blew up in a second. I laid there in shock, felt like a fat kid who just blew his virginity in one load, and had NOTHING to say. My wife was saying "It's alright, it's alright" and I finally responded with the worst fucking thing I could say - "I'm so sorry. I'll do better next time."
Fuck fuck fuck.
She was asleep again in minutes.
What I think I should have done
I'm honestly not sure here. I did a bit of googling and searching on reddit but failed to come up with a good response. If I made a joke of it, I would be making a joke at my own expense. Self deprecation can work okay in certain circumstances, but the last thing I think I want to do is make fun of my sexual abilities in front of my wife.
I could have just STFU and rolled over and gone to sleep, but I can't see that turning out well considering this was our first sexual experience in almost a year.
So I am putting this question out to you mean bastards. What should I have done differently, and now that I am where I am, how can I rebuild my frame in her eyes?