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She's Letting me go

Reddit View
January 6, 2016
18 upvotes

UPDATE 2: Vamp's back. As u/jacktenofhearts suggested, I'm going to get some therapy for myself. I also agreed to couple's counseling, but I'm going to be the one to choose the counsellor. I know that's frowned on here, but any suggestions on how to find a good counsellor would be appreciated. Vamp has agreed to get off Reddit (stop fighting the internet) and start working with me IRL.


UPDATE: We're going out for dinner with the kids in a little while and then Vamp and I are going to have another "talk" We'll see what comes of it.


You may remember me as Whatthel1. I'll just make a long story short. Vamp is leaving. She told me tonight she's realized that she can't make me happy and is letting me go. She packed a bag and went to her brother's.

I fucked up. I did this shit all wrong, and for the wrong reasons. I stupidly expected her to react too quickly to my improvements and then pushed the dread too far. I lost her trust, and It looks like there may be no coming back from that.

Not sure why I'm even posting this, except to admit I fucked up and be an example to others.


Post Information
Title She's Letting me go
Author Astronomoron
Upvotes 18
Comments 18
Date 06 January 2016 03:43 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/207763
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/3znyiy/shes_letting_me_go/
Similar Posts

Red Pill terms found in post:
dread game
Comments

[–]jacktenofheartsRed Beret43 points44 points  (43 children) | Copy

Well, that's unfortunate. I'm in the minority who doesn't think your wife is a cunt. Mostly because I think RPW is actually some really weak shit, but that's another story.

I also suspect you were pretty happy in your "Blue Pill" marriage, until reading some Red Pill shit somehow caused these buried feelings of insecurity, from all the times you were overlooked by some girl in high school/college/whatever, and caused you to resent your wife for no reason. It probably also opened up feelings of insecurity with your own wife, who you likely had heretofore felt that you had "punched above your weight class" to marry, and subconsciously caused you to think expressing anything like kindness, empathy, or agreeableness was actually driving her closer and closer to divorce raping you on her way to branch-swing to the nearest Chad.

In any event -- if you want advice on how to reconcile, PM me. Since the consensus here seems to be that your wife's a piece of shit, and for all I know you actually agree with them, no point in taking up space here if that's the case.


EDIT: Apparently she's still fighting the internet. Sigh. I feel bad for your kids.

[–]Redneck001Red Beret4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

In any event -- if you want advice on how to reconcile, PM me. Since the consensus here seems to be that your wife's a piece of shit, and for all I know you actually agree with them, no point in taking up space here if that's the case.

I'd like to read your advice, and I don't think it would be taking up space. Your perspective is interesting, and I think your thoughts on reconciliation would be beneficial. Especially for RP Rambos that reach too far, too fast (not that OP did, his wife appeared hell-bent on single-handily unraveling her relationship).

Disclaimer: I don't think OP's wife is a POS, but she is certainly a force of nature.

[–]sunfistkid1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I second that notion to hear his perspective on reconciliation. You know, for science.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (15 children) | Copy

I don't know if you're in the minority. I agree with you completely. I also agree with /u/chief_slap_ahoe that we never really got an answer about what he wants, other than "didn't want to end up divorced like my friend." That means he was worried that she was going to divorce him before he came to the Red Pill. Maybe he was unsatisfied too, but that wasn't the primary issue. He felt that she was unhappy in the relationship, and thought that the Nice Guy issue was a central problem because a book happened to resonate with him. Both of them are too guarded to let us in on that, if they're even aware of it.
 
He didn't owe us an explanation, but I worry that he didn't answer because he doesn't have an answer.
 
The Red Pill became a focus for a pair of people who weren't satisfied, weren't sure why, and couldn't communicate well. He then misunderstood the red pill content to mean that he should communicate even less,and things fell apart. She used Reddit as a proxy for him, and now he's out on his ass. The kids suffer, he blames himself, she blames him and us, and she goes blameless for whatever was wrong in the first place.
 
This all started because of the way each of them was feeling. It wasn't about logic. She's picking apart the red pill rhetoric in a pointless attempt to rationalize an emotional problem. She's so fucking desperate to "win" that she has become completely stuck.

[–]dota2nub0 points1 point  (14 children) | Copy

She doesn't seem stuck, since, you know, she's leaving...

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (13 children) | Copy

Smartass.
 
Mentally stuck, consumed with red pill rhetoric to the point that anger at the red pill and her husband had become blended and she railed against both. She seems to be getting unstuck now. I have a lot of respect for Vamp - I hope it didn't come across otherwise.
 
Speaking of mentally stuck, do you consider hanging around with the manipulative characters in TBP to be identifying with your former abuser?
 
I know, I'm a smartass too.

[–]dota2nub-2 points-1 points