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FR: "You treated me so nice tonight"

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December 16, 2015
10 upvotes

My gf told me that last night as we were laying in bed and I almost did a spit take. It was a pretty profound moment so I thought I would share it here. It's profound because what she said couldn't have been further from the truth. I was a cocky asshole to her basically the whole night, but that's not what she felt. I'll explain at the end. Hopefully this isn't a shit quality post. Feel free to roast me if it is.

I decided I wanted to eat out last night. I've been getting sick of chicken and broccoli at home so when my gf called me on her way home I said I was taking her out. No big deal. As soon as she walks in she tries talking to me about her day and her job and general venting about nothing. I stop her mid sentence to tell her I only care about getting her pants off and her ass on my lap. She gives me a look, then proceeds to drop her pants and sit on me. We make out for a second and she gets up to get dressed for dinner.

After she's dressed she tries to finish telling me about her day. I bent her over the couch and dry humped her into the pillow while grabbing her hair, then when she's finished I say "I wasn't listenning" then hump her a few more times and pull her up. She gives me a bitchy look and we leave.

At dinner I ignored her request to get a certain appetizer, then I refused to evenly split the appetizer I got with her, telling her life's not fair whIle I laughed and ate more than she did. I told her our waitress was hot, teased her about all kinds of things and at one point pulled out my phone while she was mid sentence and texted someone (I usually don't and only responded because I rarely get texts at night and it was important). She tells me she doesn't like that I cut her off mid sentence and I tell her she doesn't have to like it. I ate some of her food even though she told me no, then I refused to get her dessert and laughed when she tried to act mad. After we get home I refused to help her carry her work shit inside. I honestly don't know what was going on with me but I was in rare asshole form last night.

So we get home and sit down and she tells me she had a good time, and I looked her in the eyes and told her I did too, and that I like hanging out with her. Her eyes got big and she went into the bedroom and came out naked. We didn't fuck because I was so full of ribs but she spent the rest of the night doing slutty stuff and hanging all over me. Eventually we go to bed and she looks at me and says "you treated me really nice tonight, I had a really good time". I almost lost it right then because she was completely serious.

So what happened that could allow me to be such an asshole, yet still have her tell me that she liked how "nice" I treated her? The asshole stuff I did wasn't what she was picking up on. She was picking up on the fact that I was behaving like a high value man. (This was further backed up by a party I took her too last weekend where I was the popular "life of the party" guy, and that social proof is still carrying over.)

The "nice" part is due to the fact that me, as a high value man (at least for now, in her eyes) chose to spend my time with her, and at the end reaffirmed that I enjoy being with her. All my asshole behaviors paled in comparison to how she felt being able to spend time, and be wanted by a high value man. The lesson here is that women will let you get away with anything if they view you as high value. If I had bombed at that party last weekend and been awkward or whatever, my gf would have shut me down the second I told her to take her pants off, and it would have been shit test after shit test. Always remember, a woman would rather be treated okay by an awesome guy than be treated awesome by an okay guy.

note: I cringed writing that part about being the life of the party, I'm not some cocky party asshole obsessed with social dynamics and dominating rooms, but these are things you need to be aware of. Within 15 seconds, your woman will know who the "life of the party" guy is. That's the guy you want to be, even if it makes you feel stupid typing it out 4 days later. I mostly got lucky this time as the party was all old friends of mine who I get along great with.


Post Information
Title FR: "You treated me so nice tonight"
Author cholomite
Upvotes 10
Comments 22
Date 16 December 2015 07:30 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/207817
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/3x46sa/fr_you_treated_me_so_nice_tonight/
Similar Posts

Red Pill terms found in post:
social proofshit test
Comments

[–]rurpe8 points9 points  (10 children) | Copy

I'm not seeing the actions of a high value man in this post. You seem to think that being an asshole makes you an alpha. It just makes you an asshole.

[–]BluepillProfessorMod / Red Beret4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

He treated her dismissively and refused to be drawn into her frame of bitching and whining about her day but where was he an asshole in this post?

I refused to evenly split the appetizer I got with her, telling her life's not fair whIle I laughed and ate more than she did. I told her our waitress was hot, teased her about all kinds of things and at one point pulled out my phone while she was mid sentence and texted someone

A man putting himself first, treating his woman like his favorite fuck buddy, and affectionately assuring her he has a great time with her? I don't get it.

[–]rurpe0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I refused to evenly split the appetizer I got with her, telling her life's not fair whIle I laughed and ate more than she did

I'm 50/50 on this one. Just seems like he was being petty out of spite or to prove a point

I told her our waitress was hot

This was incredible weak. There are hot people everywhere. Had he had any game\class\status, the waitress would have shown interest in him and generated a ton of passive dread.

teased her about all kinds of things

Teasing and playful if fine. who knows what was actually said

one point pulled out my phone while she was mid sentence and texted someone

Being a rude to...be rude? Doesn't seem like something a high value man would do.

The other stuff was good but it just seems like he went out of his way to be an asshole and he seemed to believe that his "asshole" actions got him laid.

[–]cholomiteMod / BP Downvote Magnet[S] 2 points3 points  (7 children) | Copy

No, being an asshole didn't make me an "alpha". A variety of reasons, primarily her seeing me as popular and a social leader last weekend, combined with the red pill stuff made me an alpha in her eyes. The point of this post was to highlight how girls react to supposed "asshole" behaviors when with an alpha as opposed to a beta. If I had been a beta in her eyes she wouldn't have felt so nice around me.

Also I'm not trying to prove I'm "alpha" or anything, just had a good run these last 2 weeks. This could all change tomorrow.

[–]rurpe1 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy

The point of this post was to highlight how girls react to supposed "asshole" behaviors when with an alpha as opposed to a beta. If I had been a beta in her eyes she wouldn't have felt so nice around me.

She didn't treat you like a beta loser because you have a history.

Frame is fluid and will likely move in between the two extremes (beta and alpha). Simply existing on one extreme for a very short time is unlikely to have any real consequence on your relationship.

http://therationalmale.com/2011/10/12/frame/

[–]cholomiteMod / BP Downvote Magnet[S] 1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

History means nothing, I've been with her for 10 years and if I'm a beta in her eyes, she will treat me as such. Same goes for a 1 month relationship and a 50yr relationship. I don't understand your point.

[–]rurpe-1 points0 points  (4 children) | Copy

You seem to think that people are either Alpha or Beta. There is a wide range. Operating on one end for few hours isn't likely to significantly affect your overall history with a girl.

This is why Betas come here and fail hard after trying to alpha up for a few weeks and why Alpha men can show some beta and still maintain frame.

[–]cholomiteMod / BP Downvote Magnet[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

I think you've misunderstood me. I know that women live in whatever emotion they are experiencing in that moment. I can wake up and be alpha in the morning and fuck up and be a beta in the evening, and vice versa. I just didn't understand your point about having a "history".

Also, I disagree about asshole actions not being alpha. While not every asshole move is alpha, plenty of them are. Ignoring her food request, taking her food for myself, refusing to share equally, telling her to take her pants off..etc. It's asshole behavior but I'll be dammed if girls don't go crazy for it.

[–]rurpe0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

I just didn't understand your point about having a "history".

This is not hard concept to understand: Most women will not throw away a ten year relationship because you acted like a jackass for a night. Try it for 6 months and see what happens

While not every asshole move is alpha, plenty of them are

The goal is to be a better man, not to act like an asshole. You can still get what you want out of life without pigging out on appetizers like a fucking twat.

[–]the_Zambony2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Most women will not throw away a ten year relationship because you acted like a jackass for a night.

However, in this instance, the Op's girlfriend rewarded him for being a jackass.

[–]cholomiteMod / BP Downvote Magnet[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

We'll agree to disagree. My goal is to get better and more frequent sex. If being an asshole works towards that goal then thats what I'll be. All I know is that my gf prefers the pigging out twat version of me over the nice guy hungry version of me, she just doesn't know why.

[–]SepeanRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

You clearly did something right, but careful you don't take away the wrong lesson from this.

First, you did lots of push-pull. You take her out, then act like a dick, then show clear interest, back and forth. It's an emotional roller coaster and it is the push-pull that makes it work, not just the push.

Second, you did lots of "++alpha, -beta" moves. The "++alpha" is a step up from the "+alpha" of your usual life and that is exciting for her. But if you keep up this pace of moves with "-beta" you're going to strain your relationship big time.

You had fun and showed your wife a good time and props for that, but this is one of those things that should be done rarely.

[–]AnarchoSurfer1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Doesn't even sound like that much of an asshole tbh. You put yourself first and she seemed to like that.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You acted like a man thus allowing her to be a woman.

If you are hard, then she can be soft. That feels good and feels are all that matter

[–]jacktenofheartsRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Attention from an "asshole" is still attention. This is just typical "pull her ponytail on the playground" dynamics. You don't pull the ponytail of girls you're not interested. They don't chase you, in mock exasperation, if they're not interested.

She doesn't remember tonight as all the times you pulled her ponytail. She just remember you chased her, she chased you, and you ended up tackling each other underneath the monkey bars.

If you came home and she cooked dinner and poured your favorite drink, would you have done all that other stuff? Eaten all her food, etc? Nah. You could spare teasing her because you were taking her out, driving, paying the bill, held the door when you walked into the restaurant, complimented her outfit (which is different than compliment her looks, since her outfit is about her taste), etc. I bet you did a half dozen other "beta" things that you didn't even realize.

I mean, all your points about being high value apply, but your description reads kind of silly to me. You took your girlfriend out for dinner in the middle of the week "just because," you teased her but not anything remotely malicious or "asshole"-ish, and then you're bewildered she reacted positively to that.

[–]the_Zambony0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

She liked that you did not put up with her shit.

[–]WhiteTrashKillerRed Beret-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

You kinda sound like a dick! Hey, it works for you so have at it. Don't get butt hurt when she tella you she startwd cuddling with one of her Beta Orbiters.....

Food for thought



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