Not sure what details are relevant, let me know if I should provide more:

  • Married for 10 years
  • I've been doing general self-improvement for about 3 years
  • I've been incorporating more from red pill ideas for about 1 year

My wife has become more outgoing over the past year, and flirts with other guys more than before. She sees this as harmless flirting. I'm (mostly) fine with this as I understand women generally like attention from men, so I don't feel (much) anger about that, and instead of expressing my opinion on it, I don't engage in much discussion about it and continue with my own self-improvement.

Last week she made a "new friend" and it's persisted beyond just one encounter. She talks with this guy on FaceBook a bunch and they've gone together (with others, but without me) to a couple social events. I don't expect that she would intend to hurt me, but I'm quite aware that AWALT, and I see where this kind of thing could be headed if I fuck up.

On one hand, I can continue with STFU, lift, and outcome independence. From that perspective, I wonder if she's recruiting this guy as an orbiter, and I am the alpha fucks. It doesn't feel that way to me but it's certainly possible given the situation. In that case I'm doing well and maybe this is even a positive thing?

On the other hand, I may not be exciting enough to her, and she's going out with this other guy to get her tingle fix. Whether it's for him specifically or just for a more exciting night than not going out, it still seems like this is headed in a bad direction. In that case I'm not sure what to do - my current attempt at OI might have her pursue this route more, but any attempt to lead her away from it will probably just make her want it more (just like telling a teenage daughter that she can't date some particular guy). Both seem like a bad approach.

Also, it's only been a week, so this might fizzle out as quickly as it started. But it may not, and I'd like to be headed in the right direction now just in case.

Thanks all