The wife with other women

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black_second_coming
February 10, 2019
18 upvotes
askMRP

We were at a friend's birthday party last week and she, the friend, kissed my wife, twice.

I have no problem with it, but my wife did. She has expressed interest in women and having a threesome, but has said she doesn't think she could go through with it because she would have a hard time with me being with the other woman.

So last night she asked me a question: why am I ok with another woman kissing her, but not another man?

I replied with Donovan Sharp's answer from a Red Man Group episode, "women are so attractive that they can't help being attracted to each other." Then I said that, unless she decides she's a lesbian, another woman isn't competition, but another man is.

I also said that I was only ok with the kissing because I was present, and that it's a no go if I'm not there. She also agreed with that.

I'm wondering what the consensus is on this question.


Post Information
Title The wife with other women
Author black_second_coming
Upvotes 18
Comments 45
Date 10 February 2019 03:04 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/215522
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/ap4mva/the_wife_with_other_women/
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[–]rpsheepdog19 points20 points  (2 children) | Copy

I've had a few conversations w/ my wife about this topic.

Long story short I told her there is nothing a woman can bring to the table that I uniquely provide.

​

IMO girl/girl play is not the same as dudes actually fucking. There is a primal nature in putting your dick in somebody that girls can't replicate.

[–]black_second_coming[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah that makes sense, I just couldn't articulate it last night.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Which is the reason why lesbian couples fuck eachothers with penis-shaped dildos and why with most of these couples, you can clearly tell which one is the "man" (i.e. dominant one) and which one the woman. Literally every lesbian couple I've ever seen IRL it was the case.

[–]470_2_700_nm4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

If you have to ask you are not ready.

Does your wife ask about equality between the two of you too? Does she wonder why you do driving? Why you are leading? What it means that you have a dick?

Do you know?

[–]black_second_coming[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

No, she doesn't ask those questions.

[–]helaughsinhidden16 points17 points  (9 children) | Copy

Sure, every guy here thinks he is alpha enough for a threesome with his wife and a plate. They also he can still keep her as a side chick and keep his wife happy too. I call bullshit.

IMHO, you came off as week in your wife's eyes because, as her questions indicated, she thinks you are "letting someone else" kiss and/or fuck her and that made you look weak. Check her words out, if women spoke the truth and we all know they don't, she might have asked "what kind of man sits back and doesn't do anything when somebody kisses their wife, especially when the wife did not like it?". Doesn't matter to her if it was a man, woman, trans, or German shepherd... you didn't protect her from feeling violated and humiliated and then told her you liked it.

Can someone with amazing frame pull off threesomes and swinging without long term damage? Yes. You can also win 6 Superbowl's too. Are you Tom fucking Brady though? This will cause the end of the LTR in a VAST majority of examples. Even worse if it is either your wife's idea or the other woman's.

I know I'm not there so I don't try and I don't recommend you do it either. I think your wife knows your a faggot and would see you as a cuck forever.

[–]black_second_coming[S] 6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy

Some good points here. She has made out with other women before, but our friend was drunk and agressive and even though my wife was into it at the time, it wasn't until the next day that she said it made her uncomfortable.

[–]helaughsinhidden16 points17 points  (1 child) | Copy

We all have that fantasy bro, but very few men that are in success LTR/marriages can pull off the threesome with the wife and not mess it up completely. I'd say zero % chance when it is the wife's or the other woman's idea. The 5% of men that make it happen have to be so outcome independent of a breakup that I'd say they didn't have a quality woman to start with.

When I was a kid still, a drunk and sad man I didn't know said something I wouldn't understand for years. He said "if you feel like you have to have a threesome, rent them both" and walked away.

[–]Evomon3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Wow! That's line will stick with me forever.

[–]hack3geRed Beret5 points6 points  (5 children) | Copy

Nah his wife just likes strange - she wants to fuck other dudes but is afraid of the consequences. She knows he’s a faggot and was just confirming it. It’s only a matter of time before we get a wife fucked another dude post from this one.

The tidbit that some may not have caught is that he said other men are competition - that was where he confirmed he was weak and insecure. There in lies his biggest mistake.

[–]black_second_coming[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yep, I realized that after I said it.

[–]civilizedfrog2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

How would you reply if it happened to you?

[–]hack3geRed Beret3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Solid question - it depends on her tone and some history. If she was serious and seemed like she wanted to for real then I’d next her because it’s only a matter of time before she did. This is covered quite a bit - once she’s headed down this path the relationship is over.

If it was inquisitive I’d prolly say something along the lines of “babe you are free to do whatever but my wife doesn’t kiss other men” and then broken record that shit. They get the hint or they don’t in either case who gives a fuck - if she’s gonna cheat no matter what you say won’t change that (unless you push her to by being a needy bitch). Just always be ready to next a bitch and realize it’s just your turn and life gets easier.

[–]helaughsinhidden1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

100% agree

[–]friendandadvisor0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It’s only a matter of time before we get a wife fucked another dude post from this one.

Yep, it'll be a "TRP was WRONG" post.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red22 points23 points  (13 children) | Copy

The group had ruled you are a faggot.

[–]WolfofAllStreetz7 points8 points  (4 children) | Copy

Always quality responses from red on this topic.

[–]BurnedRemains10 points11 points  (3 children) | Copy

If by quality you mean the exact same reply every time then yes.

[–]hack3geRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

That’s because most posters are faggots and the sooner they realize the sooner they can make actual progress.

[–]weakandsensitive1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

You might want to go back to playing video games and jerking off to anime.

Also - going to guarantee your fiance issues are related.

[–]BurnedRemains1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You must not understand trolling.

[–]The_LitzRed Beret3 points4 points  (5 children) | Copy

Yep, blatant shit test which he failed. She is actually breaking ground for a FMM threesome.

[–]vivid_mind0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Most likely without him being present...

[–]madwill0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

So what's passing the shit test?

[–]The_LitzRed Beret1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

OP has no boundaries, shit test was probing if there are, which he sort put there, but still left the door open with the comment about it is ok to kiss another woman unless she is a lesbian or whatever.

Guys always think that having their women experiment with other women is ok because it is a woman. Their porn fried minds automatically jump to hot threesomes withb unicorns and everyone lives happily ever after.

That is not how being a lesbian works. Guys are clueless to this. His wife wants to try sex with someone else. The gender does not matter.

His answers were good and showed good abundance, but it is in response to a situation that never should have arisen.

Not moralizing, but threesomes belong in the realm of plates, not your wife. Few people have the emotional capacity to deal with it properly. There is always some shit that festers in a deep dark corner.

[–]madwill0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

plates

New to this, could you define plates?

[–]The_LitzRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Women you have no actual relationship with but have sex with. Also used as a verb, spinning plates. They can fall at any time and break with no consequence to you. No emotional or financial investment.

Eg. Chad's plate Stacy developed feelz for him so he started spinning her room mate.

[–]black_second_coming[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I already knew that.

[–]friendandadvisor0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

This is the grim, bitter truth.

[–]ManguZa6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

She can't make her pregnant. She can't give her the sense of security like a man do.

[–]FereallyRedHard Core Red5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

That's called a shit test and you failed.

[–]JameisBong0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I agree with this.it possibly could lead to more trouble down the line for OP.

[–]dll1422 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I have no problem with it, but my wife did. She has expressed interest in women and having a threesome, but has said she doesn't think she could go through with it because she would have a hard time with me being with the other woman.

So last night she asked me a question: why am I ok with another woman kissing her, but not another man?

​

This is just her emoting and hamstering... don't DEER and roll with this... she is just expressing her thoughts and fantasies... I suggest taking her on a trip, have some fun with her and take her to a strip club.... no expectations or covert contracts... just see what happens. Her actions will be a tell all. Go slow with this and then see how she reacts to the experience, then see if you can take it to the next level.

My wife likes girls too. She expressed a fantasy about going to a strip club. We did that and now go occasionally and it's a lot of fun. We've had some awesome experiences! Definitely something to consider, but do what you think will work for you.

[–]Big_Daddy_PDX2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Your second answer was actually more accurate. She’s not leaving you for a woman, so they aren’t competition.

I(47) Had lots of threesomes w/ my Ex(52) when I was in my lat 30’s. Had regular girls, scheduled girls, and even picked up some girls in the wild. It was always fine because it was something WE wanted from them. We were landing some great talent for us to play with and then be done with. Unicorns is the word, but these girls we started picking up in the wild were like pre-Unicorns. A few had never done anything like it. But I never had to care about where my Ex was or what she was texting to someone else. Because it was all for us.

Here’s the kicker. Divorced now and dating one of those unicorns(33) and I’ve got zero interest in opening our relationship because having sex with people outside your relationship is a band-aid for deeper, obvious issues that you don’t want to admit. Gee, we kept picking up younger, HB8+, successful girls because my Ex was turning into an unmotivated, fat, harpy.

Just take a hard look at home to see what you’re trying to solve. I’ve had lots of threesomes and my record is 3 chicks at once. I don’t even bother with scoping for hot chicks now because I chose a high value woman.

[–]mrp_awakening1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

Shit test sounds like a shit test.

The first rule of shit tests is to never take the question at face value... unless it's a boundary. Then you defend it, preferably while she's violating it rather than later. If kissing women is not a boundary for you (sounds like it's not), a strategy would have been to ignore the question and try to flip pressure. Her question sets you up to DEER, and that's exactly what you did. Instead of DEERing, ask something along the lines of "why do you care? did you enjoy it?". Bam! Now she's qualifying to you. Bring her feelz to the surface, and then from there you can play with them. Push/pull if you want. Reinforce girl/girl if you want to try a 3way. Whatever. You can take it just about anywhere, so long as you're playing with her feelz. Just get out of the DEERing frame, and don't answer the shit test.

[–]black_second_coming[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Thanks. It's been a while since she's shit tested like this, lately they're comfort tests because of her personal insecurities.

[–]mrp_awakening2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

It's been a while since she's shit tested like this

Failed shit tests usually bring more shit tests, increasing in frequency and intensity. Watch out.

[–]black_second_coming[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Got it. Without launching into what is most likely a victim puke, I've been off the past few months, but am now getting back into it.

[–]SorcererKingMod / Red Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

OYS on the main MRP sub. Get in there and get to work.

[–]RicoDunne1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Your competition is "alpha" whether that alpha has a P or a V. Don't be fooled, because your wife isn't. If womens sexuality is fluid then so is their hypergamy.

[–]JudgeDoom691 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

No matter how you slice it, your woman is looking for something else in the bedroom. Which means you aren't sufficient.

If your wife had a higher opinion of your SMV and had more Dread of you leaving for greener pastures, there is no way she'd discuss the idea of allowing another woman in your bedroom.

Continue to work on you. Unfuck yourself, before it's too late.

[–]C_Till1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

My wife has a girlfriend that she fools around with. It’s harmless fun.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I'd be fine no matter what she does with women as long as she tells me, even if she told me after.

Her behavior is very self regimented though, she doesn't do any single girl shit.

If she was to go out and get drunk and bang random women at clubs I'd be stressed out about STDs... but that's the line. Strange women come with all sorts of unknown dramas.

Fuck all that.

[–]friendandadvisor0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

"Because I'm not a homo. Neither, a cuck."

[–]teabagabeartrap0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I think you should just set boundaries, with that you feel good.

I told my LTR, that if she fools around with other girls, I'm allowed too. She answered (as they all do) - haha you can kiss boys. Where I always answer... they don't work for me. It#s not the same. She can kiss girls, if I'm allowed too.

​

So far every plate / LTR respected it and stopped.



You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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