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My LTR has a fuckload of beta orbiters.

Reddit View
March 5, 2019
199 upvotes

Like, these guys will get her free shit, do things for her, one of them talked with her the whole way on a long car trip on the phone, just all kinds of extreme beta orbiter stuff constantly.

She’s cute both behavior and looks-wise. It’s like she really believes the world is happiness and sunshine and that these guys are all good friends and don’t masturbate to her every night.

What should my frame be?

The amount of dread I’d have to do to match her level of abundance is absurd and I have no time for it.

I can’t tell her to not literally receive gifts mailed to her house and free uber credits.

I could next her... for being a successful female? Maybe. This is on the verge of happening. But... really she can use beta orbiters for whatever as long as I’m the one tying her up and fucking her, I guess.

Have any of you dealt with this kind of situation? I basically just ignore them and her interactions with them, and will leave her when she does anything I consider too much with any of them.


Post Information
Title My LTR has a fuckload of beta orbiters.
Author sealdream
Upvotes 199
Comments 172
Date 05 March 2019 05:44 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askTRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/220856
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/axhkxm/my_ltr_has_a_fuckload_of_beta_orbiters/
Similar Posts

Red Pill terms found in post:
betaabundancedread gameframeorbiterlong term relationship
Comments

[–]Endorsed ContributorAuvergnat124 points125 points  (3 children) | Copy

You're an idiot if you really believe that she doesn't know what's up.

You have failed to establish a proper frame on the onset of your relationship.

If you have read and remember The Guide, you know you would ideally get into a LTR only after a time spinning plates and only with a girl who has proven her dedication to you consistently to upgrade from plate, to friend with benefit, to significant other. Such dedication for you is an expression of her respect for you, which would includes NOT actively maintaining a bench of beta orbiters ready to go to bat.

In an ideal LTR, she wouldn't be doing that because you would have never upgraded a plate with that behaviour.

You could let it slide as long as you're not too bothered, but don't fool yourself: she's very aware you're letting her disrespect you so she will lose respect for you and be tempted to push the boundaries a little bit more. Will you react to one of her guy-friend taking her out for dinner? No? What about one of her guy-friend offering her a ticket to fly to Paris with him for a week? Still no?

You don't need a justification to drop a girl. You still have the right to decide that this LTR is not healthy enough to lead to settling down and have kids with her, and so you go back to the drawing board. Paradoxically, this nuclear solution could maybe jolt her into the realization that your commitment is not as secure as she had imagined and that she needs to be a bit more respectful if she wants to keep you.

[–]DeatCoreBoy15 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

You nailed it! Cold hard truth has been said.

[–]grabthecactus1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Why would you not upgrade a girl with orbiters to a fwb? I don't see issue with a fwb having orbiters, especially if they are treating me right cooking meals etc. I simply wouldn't upgrade them to a LTR.

[–]MrAgamemnon359 points360 points  (35 children) | Copy

It’s like she really believes the world is happiness and sunshine and that these guys are all good friends and don’t masturbate to her every night.

Horse shit. She knows exactly what she is doing.

An LTR has to have healthy boundaries, these boundaries come from her not from you.

This kind of person will tire you out and burn you out soon enough.

[–]Pork_Sword3130 points131 points  (16 children) | Copy

Can’t agree with this comment anymore than I already do. Would upvote twice if I could.

Any half decent LTR would drop their orbiters completely from the face of the earth and would only have the time of day for their Chad. They wouldn’t risk crossing the boundary and potentially losing Chad by continuing to communicate with their orbiters and disrespecting their man.

This is something a LTR already knows to do. She doesn’t need to be told.

Not to mention how she’s treating these guys to begin with is a good show of her character value.

The sooner OP recognises and does do something about this disrespectful behaviour the better it will be for him.

[–][deleted] 42 points43 points  (0 children) | Copy

I’d upvote ten times if I could ^ She knows exactly what she’s doing, OP described my ex wife down to an absolute tee...

[–]sealdream[S] 2 points3 points  (11 children) | Copy

Do you have a recommendation? You mean that you think telling her that keeping in contact with these guys is not acceptable behavior is a good idea?

In my experience, women will continue to push the boundary whether I set it or not, and I’ve only drawn attention to it by mentioning it. Have you had different experiences?

[–][deleted] 28 points29 points  (2 children) | Copy

How long have you known this woman?

This top comment strikes me a bit. First of all, she might not understand all these dudes want to dick her down. My wife was ignorant about it, many women have been ignorant about it in my experience [32 relationships over 3 months or more, 7 relationships over 2 years long] so unless she's spending time with them alone I wouldn't worry too much.

Anyone who throws themselves at a person in a committed relationship is one of two things: A moron or a true giver. A true giver gives because they can and because they enjoy it. You can consider them an 'uber orbiter' giving to dozens of women, probably men to, just for the fuck of it.

The other is much more common and typical. A moron thinks someday she will be single and realize what a great friend they have been with all the gifts.

Dude saying she should instinctually drop all her orbiters for you, that's called social suicide. It's unhealthy and borderline insane. She's not a fucking sex slave and these 'orbiters' are in truth a group of individuals she considers her friends.

There are limits to these friendships and you should comprehend them very clearly. Some of those relationships might be closer than others. As a long term partner, you should deeply understand where she is at with each other person that is in her life, otherwise you have a FWB that you are 'pretending' is an LTR.

The difference with an LTR is you know she doesn't want anyone else, you know by her actions that she understands you, she understands what you believe commitment means and you do the same for her.

An LTR is very tricky and I think mostly people are just too scared to 'just be close friends' and jump into LTR relationships way too soon. I know I did, time and time again. I was like "lets throw the LTR label on it and figure it out as we go." which was 9/10 a fucking shit show 3 months later.

Even my long term relationships ended, this current one has higher chances of survival but I remain skeptical and ready to leave at any time. Does she recognize that? Yes. I wouldn't be in a relationship with a woman who doesn't understand that separation is always on the table. I commit to her fully now, but if things change and we should split, I have the will and ability to break our bond and walk away in a positive and confident manner.

Please just fucking communicate with her about these people. You don't need to tell her to drop them up front, you need to understand these relationships and decide together which ones are shit and which ones are worthwhile to maintain. These orbiters might turn out to be excellent life long friends for both of you, if you can't figure out how to enjoy a friend of hers, chances are with time, as she becomes more like you and you become more like her, he will fuck off on his own.

Only things that serve you both will maintain in a true LTR that is meant to last. Anything less is going to fail anyways so it doesn't really matter.

You should have the talk where you tell her every single one of those dudes does beat off thinking about her, they all want to fuck her. I mean technically, we all want to fuck her.

[–]sealdream[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Thank you for this comment.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I've dated women with orbiters a few times. They don't matter much at all, they are in a place with her, she keeps them in that place but I never thought I would be with those girls long term. I mean sure, if I am, then that's fine no big deal, but it's really just a thing that you look at and decide how you really feel about it later.

Later being years, if the relationship survives that long, it doesn't matter. If it doesn't survive that long, it also.... doesn't matter.

[–]Pork_Sword31 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

u/auvergant comment below hits the nail on the head. You’re at a point where this may not be salvageable however it’s worth trying because it seems you would benefit from learning dread and being a bit more assertive about the women you decide to date.

In my experience you could dread the shit out of her and drop innuendos to try and correct her behavior. For example, the moment you see an example of what she is doing whilst she’s with you, wether it be in real life, TV or she mentions one of her friends having heaps of guys friends say something like “that’s great for them but any GF of mine would not entertain other men as it’s not something I would tolerate in a relationship” you need to find a way to start subtly setting boundaries in your relationship without being openly confrontational about it or giving ultimatums, etc otherwise she will smell your desperation a mile away and continue to do it knowing that what she is doing can get to you. Also DREAD DREAD DREAD.

If she doesn’t get the hint your dropping (trust me, girls aren’t this fucking stupid that this would fly over her head like they want people to believe) you need to straight up next her. (Soft next for a week if you really want to try to salvage the relationship but IMO I would hard next) and send a clear message that her behavior in this relationship will not be tolerated. If she asks why, it can go two ways. Don’t say anything, just you need time to yourself to focus on other things OR say something like, remember, I don’t tolerate girls who entertain other men whilst in a relationship. Then leave it like that and don’t speak to her again. After that it’s up to you wether you think you want to salvage the relationship or not. I’m not going to tell you what to do because either way it will be a good learning obstacle for you in a TRP sense.

For future though, make sure you clearly yet subtly set boundaries by using innuendos early in a relationship. I’ve always done this in most of my relationships where I’ve needed to and every time the woman has fallen in line with my expectations completely and submissively. Never be scared to punish bad behavior by withdrawing attention and/or hard nexting.

[–]OutsideTheCage3-5 points-4 points  (6 children) | Copy

Break up with her.

If you're not man enough to do it, just be psychologically and financially and logistically ready for her to leave.

[–]HurricaneHugues0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

He doesn't need to breakup. He can just play her by letting her believe that she has him fooled. He can use those orbiters to his benefit. All he has to do is tell his girl to ask an orbited for something and he'll get it.

[–]InsidiousCurve2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

He's worried that dark triad Chad will come around and slither his way into her pants. Nothing you can do, just going to have to deal with it and continue to use dread game.

[–]RuleTheOne0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Lol so basically there's no other option EXCEPT dread game?

[–]InsidiousCurve4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

Pretty much. He has to condition her by rewarding her when she gives her time/attention to him. Vs. entering her frame and telling her "hey, all your guy friends are starting to make me feel uncomfortable" and automatically dropping himself down a bit on the "value scale." You can't change her opinion, she'll keep seeing those guys because it boosts her ego and self-esteem.

[–]Blaze_Bless0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

If you have slipped up and entered her frame, what's the recovery protocol, how to undue that damage?

[–]InsidiousCurve0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Just use dread until she starts entering your frame again, and then reward her with a compliment/kino. The more desperate/beta you look, the longer it will take for her to "change her mind" subconsciously and see you as a leader.

[–]mrpoopistan61 points62 points  (8 children) | Copy

I'm gonna disagree here.

If the whole world licks your ass clean every day, eventually you just assume that's how the world works.

Throw in the standard solipsism, and it's fairly easy to fall down that hole.

[–]Thisisforporn99999 1 points [recovered]  (6 children) | Copy

Thank yoooouuuuuu. Yeah there are a lot of girls with sociopathic traits but some are just kind and naive. Witnessed it firsthand enough to tell the difference

[–]ilovevidya2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

And I've witnessed that firsthand turn out to be bullshit enough to know that isn't the case. Most women aren't kind and naive, they just act that way so they can justify having orbiters to their beta bf's. This sub is a joke.

[–]L1amas0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

You're probably right about a lot of them, but IME a lot of them are ignorant/naive/downright retarded.

You're giving them too much credit, lol. Or I'm not giving them enough. Or both.

[–]daymi1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

People are different and it's a matter of their age, too. If they are young, they might be oblivious. After 25? No.

[–]mrpoopistan2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

"Kind and naive" is really overstating the case.

Humans are collectors of social capital, regardless of their motivations. Some people just have so much social capital that they suffer from the "born on third base / think they hit a triple" problem.

That doesn't make a person inherently kind or naive. In many cases, it just makes them dangerous and clueless.

[–]Luftiwaffe6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

lol

[–]Gr33d3ater0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Same. You quickly learn how to manipulate the world when people make it so easy for you from day one.

[–]weag5l1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

This would have to be like the mother of all hamsters.

[–]Thisisforporn99999 1 points [recovered]  (2 children) | Copy

You’d be surprised. Some girls really are that naive. I’ve seen both: the ones that are secretly manipulative and narcissistic and are playing dumb and the ones that genuinely thought people were that nice and cried when I explained to her that it’s all anterior motives. She eventually saw the truth and now she sees it for what it is but those weren’t crocodile tears. She was just really naive. A lot of kind hearted rich girls end up that way

[–]kylerosa216 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

I don’t believe that “naïve” trope. AWALT.

[–]jackandjill220 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yeesh.

[–]newflame9731 points32 points  (2 children) | Copy

I disagree totally.

Girls that are really hot, and nice have things incredibly easy. Everyone caters to them, over time you think that doesnt feel natural to them?

Then when these orbiters that they think are "friends" with admit their feelings, the relationship ends and the girls literally cry their eyes out about it because they truly thought they had an amazing friend and lost them.

[–]zaze1210 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

They don't give free shit to people,what they know is that MEN give pretty girls free stuff. Women don't go around paying shit for men,they know what they are doing,at least at some degree.

[–]magx018 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

cry their eyes out about it because they truly thought they had an amazing friend benefits and lost them.

Fixed that for ya.

[–]zaze121 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Upvoted. They know very well.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

No she doesn't.

[–]Sero-Flex68 points69 points  (8 children) | Copy

Why not cash in yourself on all the free shit she gets from those weirdos? That’s what I’ve done in the past when my LTRs has orbiters (although I wasn’t aware of all the TRP terminology at the time). One time this dude sent my gf at the time and I dinner to my house (on the assumption it was just for her) and when I saw him a few days later I made a point of audaciously thanking him for dinner the other night. The look on his face when he realized I was fucking his dream girl and that he bought me dinner as a result was priceless.

[–]ChesterRickman12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy

That's amazing lmao, I have to do that

[–]Moldy_Gecko7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah, that's usually my go-to as well. My ex-FWB gave me shit for my daughters (like hairclips) that her orbiter would buy her. Other random shit as well. Not sure why people get bothered by orbiters.

[–]AnakinRebornRage0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

This guy gets it right here. If you feel threatened by orbiters then you need to lower your ego. Might she fuck one of them, hey absolutely but 9/10 they are just beta providers and emotional tampons. If you really believed the premise of this forum then you wouldn't feel threatened by these guys in the first place. I have absolutely told FWB's to take full advantage of her orbiters and sometimes it benefits me as well as have my friends done in the past as well. You're looking at things all the wrong way if you see beta orbiters as anything other than a resource. This comment gets it.

[–]vivid_mind 1 points [recovered]  (4 children) | Copy

Maybe his face was like that because he cum in the plates and didn't expect to be in a threesome?

[–]andrazte0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

We don't need content like this here.

[–]Sero-Flex-1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy

What’d he say?

[–]andrazte1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Forgot, something about blasting cum all over. More like a troll comment.

[–]kellykebab96 points97 points  (9 children) | Copy

receive gifts mailed to her house and free uber credits

You want to date a spoiled teenager?

I could next her... for being a successful female?

You understand that your dad never dealt with this bullshit, right? The more we enable this incredible entitlement and insanity, the longer it will go on.

Friends are fine. Constant gifts and bugmen slaves are bullshit. Tell her to shitcan the crazies and if she doesn't, hard next.

These spoiled chicks are out of their fucking minds. To say nothing of the dudes.

[–]slayer_in_midst 1 points [recovered]  (8 children) | Copy

How to use the vertical blue line to quote text?

[–]kellykebab10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

"> quoted text"

(no quote marks, just what is inside the quote marks)

Click on "formatting help" when leaving a comment for basic formatting tips.

[–]thirstybitch1349 points50 points  (6 children) | Copy

by never breaking your frame. Be alpha as fuck and the text quote line just appears.

[–]slayer_in_midst 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy

by never breaking your frame. Be alpha as fuck and the text quote line just appears.

Thanks man, you rock!

[–]Flintblood1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

Lol, dude. I’ll try that with everything else I can’t figure out today.

[–]thirstybitch131 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

My tech support consultancy is taking off... I can feel it!

[–]Flintblood1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

If you need more business just whip it out and show dominance. Alpha dafuq out of it

[–]thirstybitch132 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is really going to help me reach the next level with my catered children's birthday party business! Thanks TRP!

[–]mrdeeds197218 points19 points  (5 children) | Copy

If she's your LTR, you obviously didn't vet her properly. There's no way to right this ship. Soft next. Set out expectations and boundaries early next time.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

He can right the ship, if he shows that he has balls, she will almost certainly find that attractive and follow suit... but I wouldn’t consider the ship right for long term... but then again I don’t believe in marriage or monogamy or that women are worth being in an LTR at all... maybe OP does, each to their own.

[–]sealdream[S] -1 points0 points  (3 children) | Copy

It’s hard to soft next when I already give her so little compared to what she gives me.

So maybe I should be giving more, so that my leaving is more powerful.

But giving more lowers my attractiveness.

So I should raise attractiveness in other ways.

But instead of raising my attractiveness for women, I’d rather just work on what I think is important. Which is attractive.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten8 points9 points  (1 child) | Copy

Do not listen to these losers. Yes you have boundary problems, but every girl worth having will have orbiters. Refer to auvergnat's reply and then VasililyZaitzev's. You can either gradually set boundaries or just not give a fuck. I recommend the latter

[–]Prysefighter1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Exactly these guys need serious mental counseling. You're in a precarious position but you don't need to NEXT the girl because she's not your incredibly insecure slave.

[–]Duke31862 points63 points  (10 children) | Copy

How old are you?

Can you imagine any POTUS, CEO of a major corporation, business owner, elite athlete, sitting there and accepting that their wife is talking to a bunch of beta orbiters? If she's over the age of 25 that's a red flag, she should be setting boundaries and honestly having very little if any unnecessary communication with guys that are trying to get into her pants.

She should be busy bettering herself as a person and giving you attention than wasting more than 5 minutes entertaining some guy that just wants to screw you over and get with her. Also, any man that pursues a taken woman is a beta cuck orbiter. Why would she waste two seconds of her time entertaining a person like that?

Like, how is this supposed to work these days? When you're 35 years old and possibly have a few kids, is she still going to be snapchatting guys she's had sex with before? This culture is seriously a joke.

Call her out on it, but don't be controlling. Tell her that you don't like it and you don't feel respected. If she has any sense or respect for you, she will distance herself from them.

[–][deleted] 35 points36 points  (6 children) | Copy

Yep, she may test you on calling them out, this is a shit test.

She will say “we’re just friends, can’t I have guy friends? That seems a bit controlling”

The correct answer to this shit test is simply

“You can do whatever you like, I’m not forcing you to do anything, and vice verse, but our actions decide where this relationship is going... we can keep it for polyamorous if you prefer”

[–]chadsvasc12 points13 points  (1 child) | Copy

Yes this exactly. Women's brains don't work with confrontation well (God forbid their make decisions on their own).

She's essentially trying to walk all over you with that orbiter shit. She's either extremely naive or a complete attention whore in her subconscious

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yep, like a child she naturally has to test boundaries ... pushovers are quickly identified... attraction loss naturally follows...

One of the many survival instincts engineered into our DNA due to the fittest surviving over the course of our entire evolution.

It’s all really about procreation in a very primal way

[–]GrinninGremlin1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

“we’re just friends, can’t I have guy friends? That seems a bit controlling”

"....Relationships always involve control, but in healthy ones it is voluntary self-control. It is being honest about what you want in a relationship and then choosing to live according to the boundaries that you have promised to respect. It is two people being the guardian of each other's hearts and never allowing situations that would cause hurt...even if it is strictly-speaking a "right" because what is best for your partner is important to you. This is my hope for us, and so when girls approach me, I don't shun them as friends, but I also make sure that my words and actions make clear that friends must respect the boundaries of my relationship with you. If she wouldn't hug me in front of you...then she shouldn't do it when you are not around. Intimate physical contact, intimate language or terms of endearment, intimate communications about personal matters would all be evaluated on the basis of "How would you feel if you were sitting here ?" Friends who can't...or won't...respect my choice to reserve special parts of my life for my partner are acting against my wishes, and as such, are not being "friends" as I define friendship.

If something like this isn't what you are seeking in a relationship, please be honest and let me know."

[–]sealdream[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Did you write this or take it from somewhere?

[–]GrinninGremlin0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I just let it flow...except for that phrase "guardian of the heart" part which I read somewhere long ago. I'm sure if you dissected it you could find bits of NLP mixed with emotion-evoking wording, but I just approached it like a first draft with the idea that someone else might suggest modifications. Generally what I was going for was the frame shift of a non-ultimatum way of getting her mind to accept compliance based upon voluntary choice rooted in a sense of equality. I don't think a frame of disinterest will encourage change...so the trap of demonstrating trust by tolerating orbiters just seems to send a message of neediness or perhaps fear of reacting because of a scarcity mindset. On the other hand, being labeled "controlling" is also leading toward being seen as needy via jealousy issues...which again signals that she is in control of your emotions. I believe the answer is in the middle...an attitude of non-threatening, non-demanding, calm assertion of "This is a description of what I want and am willing to accept." It offers a hint that you are considering commitment, and approaches her response as a question of "Does she qualify?" rather than some sort of begging or negotiation from a position of weakness.

[–]sealdream[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think your advice is golden.

Many responder seem to have extreme outlooks on the matter, and yet no consensus can be met. In these cases, I like to search for a middle way as well.

[–]vivid_mind3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

I don't feel respected

Maybe OP should also cry a little like a bitch he is to show how hurt his feelings are?

Your advice is sound apart from the last bit. I think OP should hard next.

[–]jackandjill22-2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy

Lol

[–]ArthurTheAstronaut21 points22 points  (2 children) | Copy

She’s cute both behavior and looks-wise. It’s like she really believes the world is happiness and sunshine and that these guys are all good friends and don’t masturbate to her every night.

I didn't believe people like this existed until I met one last year. There really are women out there that see the world as nothing but rainbows and butterflies and truly don't see the attention they're getting from other men as anything other than the men being as friendly to her as she is to everyone else.

That said, I think the other guys here are onto something; Depending on how old she is, she should be cutting most if not all of that communication out of her life completely without needing to hear about it from you whatsoever.

Regardless though you've just got to call her on it. She appreciates either you or the beta cucks more than the other. I'd say find out sooner rather than later.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

I disagree, if you prove them on any of it, they will admit it. You can checkmate the truth out of them, they’re just not going to openly admit to enjoying the attention of beta males... I don’t think they really feel the need to articulate it

[–]positiveredpill38 points39 points  (3 children) | Copy

They all have orbiters dude. Stop trying to get rid of hers and start trying to get some of your own.

[–]Yvan_btw-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

You got my up vote!

[–]dalkride22 points23 points  (2 children) | Copy

Fuck the comments saying that this is bad behavior. Who the fuck cares? She comes home and fucks you.

You should WANT a bitch that other guys want to fuck. Who wants an ugly bitch that nobody wants to fuck? Nobody.

Keep her in check if she gets a big head around you, but otherwise who the fuck cares? If she ends up fucking one of them, just hard next and move on with your life.

In the wise words of the legendary Patrice O'Neal, you have to be willing to take the L. Your frame in this scenario is "I don't give a fuck about those guys because your pussy is mine" and that's that.

[–]BookyMcBooks9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

Right, this is what I'm thinking.

If you're truly red pilled, you don't really give a fuck what any woman does.

A truly red pilled man will just fuck women and live his life.

[–]Duke3188 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

It's whether or not she chooses to engage with them or not is what makes the difference.

A good woman never puts herself in vulnerable situations with other men. Would I as a taken man, be alone in a hotel room with another attractive female? Absolutely not, because it puts me in the shadow of doubt, it straight up looks bad, and it also puts me in a vulnerable situation where something could go down. No one is invincible to cheating or making mistakes, but smart people avoid situations where there is even a chance that something could go down.

There are VERY few women that don't attract SOME men. Even average looking women have guys that go crazy for them.

As far as I'm concerned, any woman that puts herself in the shadow of doubt, is not relationship material. I don't know a single woman that has been successfully married 10+ years that talks to other men that actively pursue them.

When you truly have options, you don't even waste time with these attention seeking women. I feel like this is a younger person issue, because when family, kids, careers, and real life comes into play, nobody has time to be talking to orbiters.

Go ahead and downvote me while your girlfriend gets dick pics sent to her behind your back on snapchat from other guys.

[–]8380atgmaildotcom6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

You should take those gift cards and uber credits. Not sure how but that's how a pimp functions

[–]sealdream[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

I’ll try it on and see how it fits.

[–]juggernaut87 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

What's so difficult? Your frame is she fucks you and you (and her) make fun of those pathetic losers. Occasionally call her out when she goes too far. For example: she tells her orbiter to do something like drive 100 miles to get her some flowers (ridiculous example for emphasis), you tell her that decent people don't use other people like that because it's true.

[–]BookyMcBooks6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

Bro. ANY attractive female is ALWAYS going to have hundreds of dudes trying to fuck her.

If you are an attractive female, you cannot leave your house without being harassed by orbiters.

Really attractive women have like, an orbit radius of 1 mile, you should know this bro.

This is a simple fact of life.

[–]mrpoopistan4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don't forget the benefits of sitting in that perfect spot in the 6 to 7 range, where a chick is just low enough in SMV that friggin more guys plow in giving her attention because they think they have a chance.

[–]mrpoopistan22 points23 points  (15 children) | Copy

Let's remember that the alpha-beta hierarchy is a complete mischaracterization of primates in nature.

An alpha is the top ape.

The betas are the apes who benefit from being near the alpha. Some betas will kill the alphas and take over.

Gammas are the wimps surviving by not picking fights.

Omegas are the apes on the outside looking in. An omega is a dead ape who just doesn't know it yet.

The reason we get the hierarchy wrong is because in nature the omegas exist on a conveyor belt of death. In our world, they just sit around playing video games and fantasizing about mass shootings.

We have a tenancy in modern human hierarchies to lump the alphas and betas together into one cluster of alphas and lesser alphas. This leads to us mislabeling the gammas and the omegas as betas.

My point?

The guys you're worried about would be, in an early human society where death was more common, the wimps hanging on for dear life at the edge of society.

You're worried about something that isn't worth worrying about. In the eyes of the average woman, these dudes don't even count as human. They're basically the birds that pick the alligator's teeth in a symbiotic relationship. They give her attention. She makes them feel barely human.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Lmao gawd that’s brutal and so... so fucken true.

[–]chubz4you4 points5 points  (5 children) | Copy

Good point. So is the real question, “why would you be in an LTR with someone that comingles with the riff raff in the first place?”

[–]sealdream[S] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

Would you prefer she “hangs out” with other alphas?

[–]chubz4you1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

No, im wondering if she has low self worth and thats why she enjoys attention from bottom feeders

[–]sealdream[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Hmm, it’s possible. I’ve thought about that myself. Why does she value her time so low as to spent it receiving low-value people’s attention?

But that’s kind of a man’s way to think. She’s just going with the flow.

[–]mrrooftops0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

If you think they're the alphas then you are being beta

[–]mrpoopistan1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Humans are traders of social capital, and a free dollar is a free dollar.

[–]Mailman73 points4 points  (5 children) | Copy

What if one of these guys is the beta waiting to kill him?

[–]BookyMcBooks17 points18 points  (2 children) | Copy

This subreddit is so fucking autistic sometimes.

[–]mrrooftops4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

haha

[–]Pluglord3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

This was a good laugh to start off my day

[–]the-cat-killa1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think they all probably are.

[–]mrpoopistan0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Now you're committing the exact binning error I said people should avoid.

These guys are gammas and omegas.

[–]jackandjill220 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Eh.

[–]ChesterRickman0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Oh shit, I have to remember this one

[–]red_matrix3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

She knows exactly what she’s doing, and she wants you to be the captain, you’re ability to be stone cold to her cries and tantrums is what turns her on. If she’s rubbing this in your face - you need to have an IDGAF attitude, A&A and treat her like a child.

Always remember: she’s not yours, it’s only your turn. The glass is already broken.

[–]ChesterRickman4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Been there. You can try to make it work, but it's an exhausting LTR. The fact she keeps and enables so many beta orbiters means she needs constanst, and I meant fucking CONSTANT ego validation because she has some major self-image issues. She will value you as a guy "that's just different", until you'll get tired of her shit and slip up in your game, then she will most likely devalue you and become resentful as shit towards you. Your choice man, just don't whatever you do don't catch feelings. That's just my experience tho.

[–]DevilMayCry4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

I have to disagree with most people in this thread. I actively encourage my LTR to have more beta orbiters. For every additional beta orbiter she gets, my life becomes a little easier. I told her to get a car guy, a computer guy, and a handyman. The nature of beta orbiters is that they provide services in the blind hopes that their feelings will be reciprocated one day. However the woman rarely recognizes them as potential mates. They are just”good friends”. Instead of fighting a woman’s hypergamy, take advantage of it. A meal always tastes better when it’s on some other dude’s dime.

[–]zxcvb780914 points15 points  (2 children) | Copy

My lady friend had like 3 orbiters that I knew about. I was stressed and jealous and angry and like wtf. Then one day I just said fuck it. I actually realized that I don't care if she fucks all of them when I am not around. I could care less.

[–]Barkingtaco2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

hmmm, so not caring is the way?

[–]zxcvb780911 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

I mean if roles were reversed and you had a harem of women that just were in your life doing nice shit for you, what would she think? This is what made me not care.

I figured it is fucked up. I wouldn't do that because it doesn't seem like something someone who "loved you" would do. She must know how this makes you feel. I am sure you feel like you can be replaced by any one of these orbiters. They are literally trying to contest you for your position in her life. It is so pathetic and a mind fuck.

So I adopted the mentality. I don't care. We can talk, hang out, fuck etc. When my lady friends aren't here I don't care what they are doing and I think it eats them alive. They want someone they can manipulate but they want someone that they can't manipulate, it makes no sense.

[–]haxewep243 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Like every girl above 5

[–]Senior EndorsedVasiliyZaitzev11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

Have any of you dealt with this kind of situation? I basically just ignore them and her interactions with them...

I have a slave girl who has like 7 or 8 orbiters. They mostly creep her out. They mostly come off as subservient which is the opposite of what she wants. She minimizes her contact with them to the extent that she can, but has to tread carefully with the ones she works with, and there are one or two who she sees in social situations that cannot be avoided. She works out a lot and it shows, and even the soyim like a toned body.

Anyway, I have abundance, so I don't give two shits about the little simp betafags following her around asking if they can drink her bathwater. They're morons. Women want LEADERS not LOSERS. Simples.

[–]Endorsed Contributorvandaalen2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

how long have you been fucking her?

[–]sealdream[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Only ~9mo. Calling her LTR is probably wrong - more “girlfriend” 24m 22f

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

It sounds 100% identical to my ex wife. I called her out on it, and she definitely tested me on it, but I ultimately put it to her that I’m allowed to maintain friendships with some of the girls I used to fuck off of tinder. “But just as friends!”

I love a good logic checkmate... where you use their own game back on them

[–]Schhwing2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Only way you can turn it to your favour is if you involve yourself in it without being possessive or jealous. Like “haha look at these douchebags, get them to send x for me”. Then her abundance becomes a tool for you to use. You have to be unruffled by it or she will be turned off

[–]mrp_awakening2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Theres no abundance and shouldn't be dread as these guys are beta orbiters and not alphas. The correct response is to not care, or show any concern.

[–]Jabbermouth2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think if you mention her orbiters at all, you lose. You can’t bring it up because then she’ll call you “controlling” and say “they’re just friends. So that leaves you with 3 options:

  1. Ignore it and get used to her having orbiters

Beta move because this clearly bothers you to some degree and it will burn you out eventually.

  1. Hard next her for having orbiters

Weak move if you ask me, like you said you shouldn’t punish her for being a successful female.

  1. Get some orbiters of your own

This is the way to go if you ask me. If you get some female orbiters of your own, which shouldn’t be hard if you’re attractive and in a relationship, she will eventually realize you have them and get uncomfortable (girls don’t like competition). She’ll bring them up and then you can say “well it’s no different from what you’re doing”. The key here is that SHE brings it up first and that if she wants you to cut off your orbiters then she will have to do the same.

[–]SwoleyMoleyFrijoley2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

OP abuse these braindead retards into giving her free shit that YOU want. When my LTR has an orbiter pop up on Facebook I usually encourage her to go out with them and see how she reacts. Without fail, "Fuck no I'm blocking him" then she shows me her phone and blocks them and deletes their contact information. That's a well-vetted LTRs proper response. It's on her to show ME that she's worthy of my dick. This girl knows precisely what she's doing and it's time to either take advantage of it or next her. Allowing it to continue in anyway is like tattooing "Doormat" on your forehead.

[–]throwawayycheyeah2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

You say orbiter, I say plan C. You are probably plan B because A was alpha enough to tell her to get fucked.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

What sort of shit do they send her? What's the cost/value? Does she talk to these guys on the phone daily? Does she see them alone? How does she engage with them and how often? Have you met any of them?

In an LTR, you should have already met most of them if they are important to her. If you haven't met them, they are just acquaintances that don't matter.

Dread has more to do with your value and your ability to engage with women wherever you are without fear of retribution.

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Your options are either accept it or walk away.

Be careful though, they're all lined up to fuck her. You know it. SHE KNOWS IT. And you don't have comparable options. This is a power imbalance and you need to fix it in order to maintain attraction.

You can't stop her doing it, it's too innate in her.

So you have to get more options for yourself, somehow some way.

[–]0io-2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

As long as you're getting what you want from her, I wouldn't worry about the beta chumps showering her with gifts. I had a gf for a couple of years who worked at a bar as a cocktail waitress who literally had thousands and thousands of guys giving her business cards, multiple stacks of cards that could have filled a dozen rolodexes. I'm sure they all wanted to have sex with her, and I doubt any of them ever did. Spending thousands of dollars on bottle service to try to impress.

When you go out with a girl who is good-looking enough, you start getting "celebrity" problems. People will approach you on the street or while you're having lunch to offer her free tanning, gym memberships, ask if she's interested in promoting their new club, is she interested in modelling, etc. I would just sit there with a knowing, smug, very slight smirk. OK, thank you, sure, here's your card, that's nice. OK, good luck. Have to have lunch now, bye.

On the downside had one ONS / occasional lay (cute, but not all that hot) who had a crazy guy give her a new car who ended up stalking me for a decade trying to find out information about his "girlfriend". "I saw you go into the movie theatre, were you there to meet her?" No dude, I haven't seen her for two years. The guy would call me at work every couple of weeks, following me around to see if I would ever lead him to the love of his life... absolutely psycho. I never even saw what the guy looked like. So watch out for obsessive stalkers.

But for the most part, if she's got orbiters they're just there to orbit and provide free stuff. I've never seen them get anything.

Think of a movie star with millions of fans always sending her love-letters. I'm not sure she could get rid of orbiters if she tried. You're fucking her because you're not like them. They're no threat to you, they might as well be a different species. The more famous and glamorous and good-looking your girl is, the more it is like dating a celebrity. She's got millions of fans, and that's not your problem.

[–]2comment8 points9 points  (3 children) | Copy

It’s like she really believes the world is happiness and sunshine

You're assuming innocence where none exists. She knows what she's doing.

Cultivate abundance by having abundant options. She's not yours, it's just your turn.

[–]jrr6415sun6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy

There are innocent girls in the world

[–]Shanguerrilla4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

But everytime you tell yourself "AND this IS one of those unicorns..." you have a lotto chance of being correct when the opposite was near guaranteed... from their and my experience. While from time it is apparent it logically just becomes more true with age as well to stack greater odds.

[–]2comment0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I know, I'm one of them.

[–]Nergaal1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

one of them talked with her the whole way on a long car trip on the phone

Weird. Trip with you and she kinda ignored you to talk to a beta orbiter? Seems disrespectful

[–]sealdream[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

She told me about it after.

[–]mrrooftops6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

So it didn't happen in front of you? Shit test.

[–]Nergaal2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Seems like a weird shittest and/or disrespect. Do you usually tell her you've been flirting with girls the whole way on a long trip?

[–]ChemicalGiraffe1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Next time you post this, change the LTR to plate. Problem solved.

[–]Phoenix_20151 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Plate. See if you can get free shit from the orbiters though. Give her a list of shit you want.

[–]htowntrav1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Sounds like you’re dating a girl one step away from being a sugar baby (escort).

[–]BookyMcBooks1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Who the fuck cares? A truly red pilled man does not give a fuck what any one woman does. A truly red pilled man simply fucks women and lives his life. TRP is not complicated.

[–]mushroom_overlord1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You already have the right mindset. Never mate guard by keeping a girl away from orbiters, simply be better than them and establish a strong pair bond. Having to ensure men are blocked out of her life signals weakness within yourself.

Of course, she has to know that if she does anything with them, you leave, as the only thing you can trust about them is that they want her. To that end, you need comfort game as well as giving her the alpha dick; her world gets turned upside-down in a bad way if she makes the wrong move.

She’s cute both behavior and looks-wise. It’s like she really believes the world is happiness and sunshine and that these guys are all good friends and don’t masturbate to her every night.

She knows. All the hottest ones have these guys and its way easier to string them along than to deal with fallout cutting them off; plus they get shit.

[–]djc_tech1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I dated a girl with a large social media following and guys paying for her trips to competitions she did and stuff. I was the one fucking her so I didn’t care. She was nexted for a couple of reasons and glad I did. She ended up being s dumpster fire and I can say with all honesty no matter how hot she is someone is tired of her shit.

In my case some of the ex-bfs were orbiters and she complained they didn’t have a sex drive. I do so I did what she wanted. She likes it aggressive and likes to be lightly strangled, hair pulling and dominated. In all honesty it got tiring. And because the fact she took advantage of these other guys I never trusted her. In this case you shouldn’t either. Don’t trust her one bit and treat her like it. She’ll branch swing in a second and remember that every time you are with her. That’s what I did and when I was done I was literally balls deep in another women two days later....went back and fucked her and then called it quits for good.

[–]beginner_1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

The fact you came here and asked the question means it bothers you. Therefore sooner or later this relationship will fail due to this. But that can be said about any relationship. It's just your turn. So standard advice is keep your skills/game sharp and enjoy as long as it last and once it bothers you too much, next. This could be now, in 2 month or 2 years. Important part is not to get complacent.

Besides that you could also use those orbiters for your own gain for tasks you don't want to do. Not my GF but once had a female roommate with especially one extreme orbiter (her ex). Let's just say his orbiting and doing favors for her like getting furniture (couch, table,...) using his truck and caring into the apartment saved me a ton of work too.

I mean be lucky she didn't want you calling her for hours...

[–]HurricaneHugues1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You're taking this girl far more seriously than you should. Too many orbiters is a problem because it shows a constant need for male attention in abundance. You'll never be her only man. Each of those orbiters and you get a part of her.

Your best bet is to mentally check out of this relationship, and start using those orbiters to your favor. Want a Starbucks gift card? Tell your girl to ask an orbited for one. Got a new book u want to read? Get an orbiter to buy it. Want new shoes? Get a giftcard from an orbiter. Use her and her legion of followers to your advantage.

[–]RedSkeller1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Came here to confirm the notion that your GF knows better and is playing the game. You're only move is to hold frame or break up with her. These women are the worst though, you'll see her true colors in a matter of time.

[–]CahiersDuVidya1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

What should my frame be?

Mockery. And try to get her to get them to buy things she'll give to you. Get her thinking of them as worms who are there to provide and receive, not potential suitors.

Was banging a girl in college who had some orbiters. We met at a bar unplanned one night and one of her orbiters bought her an expensive bouquet of flowers. I mocked it and said 'looks like you're getting lucky tonight.' She groaned and rolled her eyes. When leaving in my car I told her to throw them out the window in front of the bar, which she did. She had such a huge, devious smile on her face knowing she was hurting a weak man. She started blowing me at the second redlight we stopped at.

Had an orbiter constantly calling another girl I was with. We were hooking up and he called, I told her to give me the phone and said 'she's busy' and hung out. She laughed and then went back to moaning.

Girls innately hate weak orbiters, you really don't have to worry about this as much as you can, betas are never a threat.

The amount of dread I’d have to do to match her level of abundance is absurd and I have no time for it.

If she's really cute and naive, dread might not be necessary. But I will say that dread game isn't a numbers game. Her seeing you being dangerous with two or three other girls is enough to offset a legion of harmless betas.

[–]iceporter1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

where can I learn about these beta orbiter things? I want to avoid to be one of it

[–]ChesterRickman1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

They give away freely men's most important resources in the sexual market - their time, attention and validation (and sometimes even money!) to a girl they want to fuck, constantly rewarding her for just existing and acknowledging them in some way hoping to get laid some day. They are pretty much the reason the red pill exists, because now women have so much reach with social media/pubs/clubs/dating apps/travelling/etc it's extremely easy to have a steady supply of beta orbiters, who over time inflated every average and up woman's ego to a ridiculous degree, at the same time devaluing "good guy" qualities (devaluing men as a whole even) and old school dating to the point of being seen overly abundant, a display of low SMV and plain boring. They are the real reason every normal man (or if you prefer "Chad") now has to know game.

Edit: Also, I don't think they are some bad or defective people, I believe they are just a side-effect of modern lonely society, their longing for real companionship being understandable. But at the same time, their methods are what's destroyed dating. On the other hand, it's never before in history of man been as easy to get laid by just being cool as it is now. Take it for what it is.

[–]iceporter0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I've already become one of it then.

any words or tips for me? I want to get out of it and evolve to be a chad

[–]ChesterRickman0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Learn to love yourself and control your impulses to do beta shit. Go out more and immerse yourself in your social life. Start meditating and read the sidebar. Improve your style and skin/teeth/hair/beard care. Begin lifting. Get into a mindset of abundance, because right now you are in a scarcity mindset and everytime the girl you are orbiting gives a little bit of attention your brain goes nuts and says “AAAAAAH PUT A BABY IN THAT WOMAN RIGHT NOW, YOU’LL NEVER HAVE A CHANCE TO FUCK SOMEONE SO HOT AGAIN”. Learn to value your time and don’t give it away to anyone who asks at a moment’s notice. You are a man with his own purpose and values, don’t let yourself become some spoiled girl’s toy.

[–]Mangasbzo71 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Lol OP, how you gonna be driving with her and she gonna be on the phone the whole trip there to some other dude that wants to fuck her

Lol open your eyes and think, my guy

[–]BurningOrangeHeaven1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

She a down low hoe. She isnt getting free stuff for nothing. She knows, they know, and you know.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You’re her plate. A beta buck provider.

I don’t think a conversation is necessary to apprise her of what is going on. She knows. And she doesn’t respect you enough to be loyal. Normally you can demote a girl or play dread game to train her, but you’ve put up with so much already that I don’t know if that’s gonna work now. The only thing I think you can do is to try to play some drag game The only thing I think you can do is to try to play dread game. And read the guide.

[–]hrm08943 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think you mean your ex-LTR.

[–]civilizedfrog3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

She knows what she is doing. Telling to stop contact with her orbiters is mate guarding. It would be better for you find someone else.

For now you can ask her to add stuff that you want on her Amazon wishlist and then ask her orbiters to buy it.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

This made me really laugh lol thanks 🙏

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Why would you even LTR a person like that. Shows just as much about your character as it does hers. Like attracts like

[–]sealdream[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Probably.

[–]chumjetze1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Why do you have a LTR with male friends, let alone many many beta orbiters? A girl wuo can't set boundaries (read: who needs/likes the validation) is not LTR Material.

She knows exactly what she is doing.

[–]Buchloe1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I got my gf something for her birthday one time. But some random online she didn't know bought her the same thing before I did, because she showed a picture of it on fb. That relationship was done.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Unlike people here telling you to dump her I will offer you a different perspective

THEY ARE ORBITERS

Chances or her promoting them? Damn near 0.0%

She’s just using and manipulating them to get what she wants why do you care ? Don’t fix what’s not broken , if she cheats then yeah it’s done but no just leave her.

[–]AstuteBlackMan0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Good. they're not gonna pass her shit tests, value tests and they're gonna orbit her and lower their own value and shes gonna play them on and always come back to you.

She just wants the attention. Dont stress it

[–]Totsean0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

She is ur LTR and goes on chatting with orbiters? That's not how it should go, put your foot down or find someone else. She ain't yours anyway and not worth the LTR status. Make her a plate and go back to spinning.

[–]Jsieijejeieokkd0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Go back and watch the movie something about Mary. She has high value for sure, but she is no unicorn my friend. Knock her off her pedestal and keep her there. Dominate her in the bedroom. Own that shit. Then Tell her to drop the shit heads. Tell her what they want and that that is not acceptable to you.

[–]rmcassio0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Same happened to me. Got tired. Nexted her.

[–]DarkOneoftheOutside0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I think you're the only one in the LTR bud. She's not. If she was she'd shut these dudes down. There is this married chick who messages me ever so often with some random BS. To me she's reaching for something because we have never been friends. She's creating an opening for me, an invitation to step in. Perhaps she is trying to use me to run dread on her husband...

If she's interacting with dudes and letting them do things for her it's because she's giving them an opening to do so. They aren't sending her shit for nothing. Even if it's just minimal attention and the illusion that they might get some pussy from her, she's definitely giving them fuel to do the things they're doing.

[–]Bedtimeshine0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You need to put a cap on the level of commitment you give her. I would worry about frame or shit tests or none of that shit. I would let her do as pleases with out care, and I would keep this casual. She’s plate material, don’t bother trying to fight it.

[–]magx010 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It’s like she really believes the world is happiness and sunshine and that these guys are all good friends and don’t masturbate to her every night.

Don't be silly.

[–]StopGaming12340 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You literally just described an ex girlfriend of mine. So many red flags that I ignored because I thought I was some kind of exception. She had 10+ males texting her and validating her every single day.

One of them was an extreme beta cuck, telling her all the time to leave me etc.

In hindsight they were all cucks, validating her while she tells them how I fucked her again.

I am not sure how she gets through with her manipulative behaviour but it seems to hypnotize every male she encounters.

Eventually I found out she cheated on me with a skinny small wannabe "fuckboy" (one of her validaters) and later got together with him, just to cheat on him too.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Your LTR knows exactly what she is doing. She loves her power. She is probably already testing your boundaries by passively mentioning her beta orbiters all the time as my narcissistic gf did with me.

I don't want to destroy your happieness, but it is just a matter of time til she is gone. These girls are impossible to satisfy. They need insane amount of attention which you can not deliver no matter how much you earn, lift, etc.

[–]Moldy_Gecko0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Honestly, if you're a guy with high value, why give a fuck about the orbiters? I'm with /u/zxcvb7809 when it comes to this. You care too much. Every chick has orbiters. Shit, if the first lady got out of the house, she'd have them too. They are basically filling in for some of the "boring shit" that you don't want to do. But you have to keep it in line. Keep dread and comfort at good levels. There are lots of girls out there with natural Alpha men that could give 2 shits about the shitstains attempting to talk to their girl. I'm friends with some Green Berets out here and we go out quite often... THEY have orbiters, and aren't concerned with their girl's orbiters because their women are of high enough value that the little orbiters can't compare to their man.

[–]Senior Endorsed ContributorFieldLine0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

LTR-worthy girls don't have male friends.

You mean that you think telling her that keeping in contact with these guys is not acceptable behavior is a good idea?

No, telling her that will just cause an argument ending with her calling you an abusive, controlling asshole. And then she'll probably continue to do it anyway.

The answer is to not LTR up a girl who doesn't intuitively understand the problem with this behavior. It happens to be that such a standard excludes most women, which is why we tell you to generally avoid getting into an LTR as a rule.

[–]Suchnamebro0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

How would she feel if you had chics sending you gifts and constantly texting you?!

[–]Whitefarmer0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Make fun of these loosers at every chance worked for me. It’s fun to!! When she’s mad at you and threats to talk to them tell her “go for it make my day”

[–]slamdunktiger860 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

WOW. I just went through this a bit ago. Dated this girl for a few months and she had tons of betas on deck. They were dropping off potted plants and even food. Giving lavish gifts for her birthdays and xmas.. I was like uh... Thanks ya'll, I'm fucking her tonight. So I didn't worry.

She played dumb and it even convinced me. We went exclusive after 2 months. It was wonderful.

However, the breakdown started. She'd always had a near panic attack when I went into her texts or messaging apps. Rather than just a red flag, that should've been a freaking commie flag parade for me. I didn't think much of it.

I was looking for a picture of ours in her photo gallery one day and out of curiosity, went into the "deleted" folder of photos and saw a screenshot of a chad from Coffee Meets Bagel.

This was red alert. Later when I confronted her about it, she lied and said a friend sent it to her.

I then went into the app store and then installed all the dating apps she ever used. Used the existing FB OAuth and HOLY FUCKING SHIT. Bitch had been installing and reinstalling MULTIPLE dating apps for several weeks. When she's with me, she deleted everything since I had her passcode. When I'm away... she's messaging with them, updating her profile pictures.. holy fucking shit. One of them was a PAID account. Bitch said she didn't know, "I'm not that detail oriented." What the fuck? You don't see your chase bank account alerts? Fuck, I would see those notifications

I couldn't believe it. I sat on this for half a week.

She said later her chief beta orbiter had told her to use dating apps "just for networking." I was like wtf. You took life advice from a soy boy you've had on deck since middle school? I had warned her before about him too. We had a birthday dinner and he was just a blackhole of beta dread with me next to her.

The thing about betas is that they don't engage you on the field of battle. Why would they? They'll lose. They have no pull, no attraction. They fight in the shadows. They'll poison you the way they did my girl. "Ya.. just use dating apps.. just make some friends. No big deal."

So ya, this girl blamed the guy, I told her, fuck you and GTFO. Ya'll can have a nice life together.

After I saw the dating apps and figured out what was happening. Oh ya, holy shit. It is UNBELIEVABLE to see what it's like to be a girl on a dating app. Holy fucking shit. The sheer volume of men. Chads to betas, Jesus fucking christ. If you haven't seen this before, really, ask a friend or just make a fake account. Sweet baby Jesus... I was looking at the message log to figure out how far back this went and it just stopped loading at 50 convo's or something. And that was only 4 weeks worth. Either she was deleting the rest or there is an actual limit. Idk, don't care.

So ya, betas fight in the dark and use manipulation. Alphas just take down the score.

Man, if I learned anything, you gotta fucking get rid of the betas or else. They're just waiting. If it was just one beta, no big deal, but if there's a whole zoo of them, man, they're just throwing wrenches into your LTR all fucking day.

And these broads, they fucking know how hot they are, what betas are and exactly what they're doing. They may play dumb and rationalize. When caught, they'll blame, rationalize and say anything. You just can't trust someone if they are a serial liar at that point. If they're willing to warp reality itself, you're gonna second guess them forever and that ruins the past/present/future.

Ya, as a plate, whatever, just put out. But if it's your LTR, fuck no. Standards. The mother of my children cannot lie or betray me. Period.

In general, I wasn't really worried about the betas, I was worried about her. I had turned on her GPS tracking with the iOS Find Friends function and shit just didn't match her stories because she started having beta play dates with other single girls, I was like wtf? Friends would post group outings on social media and then she'd quickly get them taken down. I realized after a few days, if I was willing to breach her privacy and all, then shit was already bad I should prep to bail. That intuition was thusly proven correct with the dating app reveal.

I also went through her recent messages and recent emails. Found out she was seeing a whole coven of mental health th0ts and she was on at least 7 SSRI's/anti-depressants (that was all mentioned only via TEXTS... god knows how polluted her brain chemistry was on such a heavy rotation... over only half a year. Fuck.) Hey, I fully respect mental health efforts, but not fucking 10 day cycles of Prozac and then on to the next. What the fuck is that?

So yea, between that and the lies, GPS shit, game over. There were other major issues, but outside the scope of this convo.

Shit man, the old adage is correct. "If you have any doubt, then there's no doubt."

Don't let bitches slide. It's a soft serial shit test and you gotta lay down the law. Here's the fucking boundary. Period.

[–]stare_at_the_sun0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Picked up a new term today.

Going to be using it to bring awareness to the beta orbiters in my life.

[–]thesnowman170 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Get them to unknowingly buy you shit. Straight pimping baby.

[–]NextForever0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Your ego is dangerous mate. Real men don't harbor this sentiment in any relationship; they address what they control and then move on. Doesn't even sound like you've said anything to her. Grow a pair and establish your boundaries instead of searching for validation on here.

[–]redpill69910 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Bro - are you me? I'm in the same position as you and have no idea what the fuck to do. Free shit all the time: food, travel etc. What are the options? Call her out? Look insecure. Do nothing? Look like a bitch. Glad you posted this. Imma read up these other responses.

[–]Retuov0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Beta orbiters doing a pretty good job if they fucking ur girl dude.

[–]syf3r0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

it seems to be part of the territory. if your girl has orbiters she must be attractive. its the fugly ones with no options thats are truly orbiters-less.

[–]FZ_BA0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

If she has a fuckload of beta orbiter, you are the real beta

[–]aDrunkenWhaler0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Have frame. Laugh at her for her behaviour. Fuck her brains out, however you want. Demote to plate.

Nexting her is stupid, just as having an exclusive LTR with her is stupid. Enjoy her while it lasts.

[–]htowntrav-1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy

Sounds like you’re dating a girl one step away from being a sugar baby (escort).

[–]sealdream[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

She has a full-time job and is self-sufficient.

[–]htowntrav0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Awesome. So why does this matter so much to you then? Are you focusing on something or someone else’s success more than your own. Where’s the introspection and evaluation of yourself.



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