How do you guys deal with people still plugged into the matrix who act like your the strange one for avoiding monogamous relationship in order to foucus and improve on ones self? (21 years old)

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March 24, 2019
139 upvotes

This tends to happen at family events and such where they concistantly ask me "have you got a girlfriend yet?" Or "are you seeing anyone?". Truth is I haven't found any girl during my plate spinning that's even close to being worth of ltr status/time investment. I'd rather continue to further myself in my goals and have the power of being able to freely take my life in any direction I want without having to think about some ltr. Of course I don't spurt out redpill theory to them or even the fact that I prefer non exclusive relationships because we know how that shit storm would go. I normally brush of the question with some joke and try and move on but after a while they just don't want to drop the topic. It's a little frustrating and I was just wondering how you guys deal with situations such as this. Thanks.


Post Information
Title How do you guys deal with people still plugged into the matrix who act like your the strange one for avoiding monogamous relationship in order to foucus and improve on ones self? (21 years old)
Author YallmindifIhitthat
Upvotes 139
Comments 54
Date 24 March 2019 08:57 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit askTRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/223101
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/b4uas0/how_do_you_guys_deal_with_people_still_plugged/
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Comments

[–]rnsbrum75 points76 points  (4 children) | Copy

Yeah I have the same problem and my parents think I'm gay

[–]Jabbermouth105 points106 points  (3 children) | Copy

Plate your mom, that will send them a message.

[–]Enlightened_Chimp65 points66 points  (1 child) | Copy

Alternatively, "Agree and Amplify".. have gay sex and send them a video

[–]mrpoopistan2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

It's very hard in 2019 to prove gay sex. He may just be a straight-identifying man having sex with other men.

[–]Frebaz14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy

If he’s still new, he can break his arm and cross his fingers lol

[–]berna_maia82 points83 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don't spill them redpill theory, but just clarify to them that you have other goals in mind and a LTR isn't a priority to you, avoiding will just make them more curious and make them talk about it more. Be honest and tell them you aren't looking for one right now.

[–]Atheist_Utopia135 points136 points  (7 children) | Copy

You really shouldn't be caring.

[–]m4t3134 points35 points  (4 children) | Copy

True but it does not answer his question of how to deal with someone insisting on the topic.

[–]xddm265310 points11 points  (3 children) | Copy

"Why dont you set me up with one"

Free plate, or if it's a family friend maybe an LTR

[–]WindIsMyMusic1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

A family friend for an LTR? I don't think it's the brightest idea tbh m8. Imagine your relationship not working out. It'll be way more drama if it's hard to avoid one another from there on.

[–]BreddyCougar 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy

Pump and dump a family friend will probably stop the incessant "wHeReS yOuR gF??" though hahahaha

[–]WindIsMyMusic1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Haha I didn't think about it that way lol

[–]peerschenk5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Exactly

[–]BurnoutRS56 points57 points  (2 children) | Copy

"Have you got a girlfriend yet?" yes

"Whats her name?" which one?

[–]Impulsive66631 points32 points  (0 children) | Copy

This. They don't care about a gf, they just want to know if you can pull girls.

[–]BurntYams2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is great, saved haha

[–]macheagle19 points20 points  (0 children) | Copy

OP, I have the exact same issue with my family and relatives. All my bluepilled cousins married “early” with toddlers and more kids on the way, and all I get asked at the family reunions and BBQs are when I will have an LTR, because you know, apparently my time is “running out” at early 30’s LOL. Seriously it is becoming such an annoyance that I actually wonder whether there are certain things I can say to make them understand my POV without explicitly spilling RP theory on them.

I’m focusing a lot on my career and physique, and while IMO some of my plates are LTR worthy, I have a good feeling they there will be more of them and likely even better ones as I hit my SMV peak probably a few years from now. So I am not at all rushed in any way. However literally no one in my family circle understands this. My parents are actually ok with as I am redpilling them gradually (it’s working), it’s my relatives that are completely clueless.

[–]ShinyRedKetoPill23 points24 points  (4 children) | Copy

The people asking this feel so much sadness for you. But if you look at yourself and look at them 5 years from now you will see you chose the right path.

When they are in their sex-less marriage with their second child on the way and 40 lbs of body fat gained and you are doing your thing. Unshackled and empowered.

[–]thewrestler6 points7 points  (3 children) | Copy

What about in the 65-90 year-old stage of life, when you don’t have kids/ grandkids to look forward to seeing and you’re literally alone?

[–]Impulsive6664 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

[–]classylassy287 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy

This has no scientific merit. It's been proven time and time again people do not like being lonely. It's against our biology.

Also working in health care I can tell you, the happiest people have familys that visit and are around all the time. The most depressed are the ones with nobody, some haven't had a normal in depth conversation with another human in yeaaars.

[–]StopGaming12344 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yep, when my grandmother was in a hospital, family members visited her atleast twice per day. I could tell the other older womans were visibly miserable that no one came to visit them.

You literally made their day with small talk.

[–]2INNASKILLZ2K1831 points32 points  (0 children) | Copy

Crabs in a bucket, fuck it. Most people want to live in their bubble, and expect life to be handed to them. Hold frame. Tell them they can join you at the gym if they want to lose the love handles.

Or 'I see where sitting on their ass gets people', and give them a sly wink.

[–]WoodWizzy8716 points17 points  (1 child) | Copy

Here’s your problem. If you’re plate spinning that much and you can’t find a girl that even worth a short term relationship, you need to up your standards like a lot dude.

Always just say your casually dating, and say that you haven’t found one that’s a right fit. Because as you know, most girls besides like 5% are trash

[–]CasaDeFranco1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Indeed, honestly even plates I find frustrating to be around; after sex one asks to watch netflix. I usually decline but one afternoon acquieced, she proceeded to have the most vapid conversation; I can't concieve how men choose to commit to these women. She was pretty but had the personality of a child. Most women below my SMV, that agree to being a plate tend to only bring physical attractiveness to the table and not much else, virtue or character wise.

[–]good-look7 points8 points  (4 children) | Copy

brah just tell em u havent found the one yet maybe theyll hook u up w new plates too

[–]WindIsMyMusic2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy

Plating somebody whose family is friends with yours is really NOT a good idea, my friend. I barely dodged a bullet there, I know what I'm talkin bout.

And one of my closest homies didn't dodge, shit now generates various inconveniences to this day, even tho the whole drama took place back in like 2012 or so

[–]good-look-1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy

dont be autistic, socially calibrate

[–]WindIsMyMusic0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Tf u mean? Being on bad terms with somebody who you got a number of common friends with means creating inconveniences for the said friends. They now have to pick which one of you to invite, they now need to be careful around even mentioning the other one in conversations, yada yada yada.

And if the family or clan ties get involved, shit gets even uglier.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

It hurts at the beginning to say to the people you love and who are your friends to be against them. The best thing you can do is be quiet, nod and agree and then do what you want anyway. It's just one of those things of becoming a TRP high value man.

On a side note, the idea that plate spinning is an audition process for finding the One is of someone that's still plugged in and needs to die. Read Plate Theory I.

[–]thisisnotme__--3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

They probably think you're gay and are too afraid to come out. Seriously.

[–]Victorious6663 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Just tell them you're happy being single and to mind their own business. If they insist on setting you up, take them up on it, pump and dump, and they will eventually stop setting you up with their friends.

[–]DirtyBastard132 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

"'I'm too busy to with work/school to date", "I haven't found the right one, I guess", "So many out there who aren't marriage material" tends to work.

[–]SexualOnion192 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don't talk about TRP like you need to impress others or get buy in. Just say you don't like monogamy and you're all about self improvement. If someone asks enough of the right questions, redpill that faggot and save a life. But don't go looking for reasons to talk about keeping frame and spinning plates.

[–]nevalutionary2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I went with my dad to meet some old friends of his. A man, his wife, their adult children, and children's children. I haven't seen them since I was a little kid. They're doing the usual, commenting on how much I've grown (sub-communication: damn you're a stud now)

Towards the end the wife says, "When are you bringing us a wife?"

I turned to her with a smirk and said, "I'll bring you several."

She laughed and that was that. We said a lot with a little.

Moral the story:

1) You're young and you're still taking people's inquisitions seriously. Maybe on some level you haven't truly broken from their approval. Ultimately what they think doesn't matter, and many people, especially people much older than you, are out of touch with the realities of dating today.

2) Confidence and frame wins. You choose your life. Do it righteously. Have fun. If people think you're losing rather than choosing, maybe on some level you're communicating that you're losing. And this may loop back to point #1.

[–]Endorsed ContributorUEMcGill4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

"All the stripers I date just keep stealing my money."

"There's only so many single moms I find attractive."

"You know any girls I can save? I love fixing girls!"

they just don't want to drop the topic

This isn't about them not wanting to drop the subject, this about frame. If people want to ask intrusive questions give them absurd answers. You joke because it's uncomfortable, and want to change the subject. Instead of that, own it and make them uncomfortable. Eventually, people will learn not to ask stupid questions.

[–]warburgio1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

have you got a girlfriend yet - yh, ive got few gf. End of story

[–]StopGaming12340 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I always answer with "Which one do you mean?" if they ask how my GF is.

[–]RedSkeller1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You'll get shamed well into your 40s, better get a good line for it.

[–]xddm26531 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Ask them for an arranged marriage

[–]2alpha-zach1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Hold frame and treat it like a shit test.

It’s only annoying because you are in their frame. (Which may make some sense because they are likely your elders)

Just latch onto the knowledge that as you improve yourself you’ll be improving your SMV. One day you’ll walk in with a smokin hot girl 5-10 years younger than you, well vetted, and submissive. Their jaws will drop, and it will have all been worth it.

[–]TRP VanguardHumanSockPuppet1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Depends on the context.

If the people in question can impact your prospects for career advancement, then feed them a pleasant-sound Blue Pill flavoured lie ("I just haven't found The One yet").

If the people in question have no impact on your ambitions or prospects for advancement, you can mostly ignore them.

[–]WindIsMyMusic1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Say "not your fucking business" in the nicest and least offensive manner possible.

The skill of doing so will serve you very well in many, if not all fields of life.

[–]StopGaming1234-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Butthurt answer

[–]youngbull240 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Redpoll information makes you sound crazy. They are going to find the info themselves because they’re open for the info to seek in their head or stay plugged in because it’s more comforting it’s a choice

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I just had very short 'relationships' but that was mostly out of personal laziness and convenience. I'd 'commit' to shitty girls but never really invest. They'd be more like a crappy live in maid that I fucked for a few months then I would get sick of her and ask her to leave.

It helped me recognize and deeply understand that few people have the ability to change. Most of who a person is, is set by the time they start having sex, true adaptive souls are rare.

Tell them plainly that you are looking but you haven't had the one. I'd say I was saving myself for someone that fit me.

[–]WiredT0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Keep walking your path and make a great life for yourself and eventually theyll stop asking that and ask if you can give YOUR advice. Thats when you speak, or at least thats the point im trying to get to. But until then, other people have better advice to side step it.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

If you've done the required reading, then you have the tools to deal with this. Start with fogging.

[–]Zegiknie0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Some people just want to watch the world burn.

If you are one of those people, ask them to set you up with a nice girl. Then plate her.

[–]Nov516050 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

man, be a diplomat , be smooth and "naive" . Luckily youre young enough to where they wont scrutinize as hard.
use lines like , "well if the right one came along, id get married", "just dating right now", etc...
We all know there is no "right one" - they are all hypergamous whores due to long programmed evolutionary biology, but just use the "right one" even when asked by women regarding if you are married or have been married before, etc...

[–]htowntrav0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Weak frame?

[–]_Anarchon_0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I've had a number of friends tell me I'm the smartest guy they know for never having been married. I don't have that problem. But, if I did, I imagine I would challenge them on it. The problems in their marriage will be obvious. If they start pressing you, press them...and point out how miserable they are, how much less of a man they are, how cucked they are, etc. They won't bring it up again.

[–]StopGaming12340 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You probably make too big of a deal out of it.

Since I started having one girl after another I get way more respect everywhere, especially in my own family.

When people ask "How's your girlfriend" I usually answer "Which one?" or "Which of those?". I always get a smile and positive reaction.

Dad is proudly telling everyone that I am spinning multiple plates at once (Of course he doesn't use TRP vocabulary).

I always thought you would get looked down for "cheating" or having multiple partners. But even my own mother suprised me when I once showed her a picture of my latest plate WHILE I was being in a relationship and all she said was "What a bomb!" with that proud look. One of the best moments in life as a son.

[–]Just15150 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I dont. Realise that they are PLUGGED IN. They all WANT a relationshio, and or kids etc. They want to find “the one”. A relationshio and maintaining one is of it ost inportance for plugged in men and women at all times. Not just for sex or their sexual fulfilment, but even a shitty relationship. Its a status thig and also a blue pilled goal.

They probably genuinely feel sad for tou are are genuine worried. You are not seemingly succeeding in this extremely important blue pill want and goal, and thry assume you want it(how can you not? Thats the way it is!) because they believe you are plugged in too.

You cant show someone the other side with words. At best they will just look at it through same lens but change it a little for your situation.

Dont bother. Just say you would perfer not to deal with a relationship or kids for now. It’ll mindfuck them.

U cant convince them. Blue pilled plugged in people will have ego identification with their relationships, even the shitty ones. A sexless mariage, with overweight wife, annoying kids and no time for yourself or your goals is “making it” to them because if it wasnt they would be forced to stare at the red pill truths in the face and it hurts.



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