Even with abundance I still catch oneitis

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March 31, 2019

I got a couple girls in rotation but I seem to be “falling” for a specific one, despite the many red flags she displays. For some reason I don’t give a shit about banging these other bitches and I only care about this specific girl. She’s definitely into me but in my opinion she’s made it clear that she doesn’t want anything too serious. So should I just cut it off with this girl before I get hurt

Post Information
Title Even with abundance I still catch oneitis
Author Ayethrowwybruv
Upvotes 59
Comments 36
Date 31 March 2019 10:35 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit askTRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/223912
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/b7tr2b/even_with_abundance_i_still_catch_oneitis/
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Red Pill terms found in post:

[–]johnn2015106 points107 points  (5 children) | Copy

Let me guess. She's the hottest.

[–]Ayethrowwybruv[S] 55 points56 points  (4 children) | Copy

You’re right

[–]EvolvedVirus61 points62 points  (2 children) | Copy

You're not doing anything, it's your dick that feels the oneitis.

I had a bit of a similar thing happen once, I thought I had this one chick in the bag, so I kinda ignored her a bit more and pulled back a little, and then a youngun protege started dating her and he tried to box me out a bit (violation of bro code and I found out cuz she kept inviting me to things) and I was furious, but really it's my dick that was furious, a night out at the bar and I was back to normal after having some fun with some hotties. I was furious because I had felt rejected and wanted her more because of the fact that she was unavailable (but that means I'm vulnerable to jealousy tactics and scarcity tactics so I simply decided not to be because that is the way of the alpha).

So remember, all these feelings you have, it's really just you thinking with your dick. Same thing happens if you dump a super hot girl and then have a very long dry-spell and you're like "shit should I go back to her crazy ass; at least the sex was great!" <--- NO, you are thinking with your damn dick.

[–]chanakya009 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy

Hail Lord Virus!

Same thing happens if you dump a super hot girl and then have a very long dry-spell and you're like "shit should I go back to her crazy ass; at least the sex was great!"

Stuck in this loop like forever.

[–]EvolvedVirus1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy


[–]resnine6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yep. Evolution at play there.

[–]asorals29 points30 points  (1 child) | Copy

Before starting to change my life with TRP I had a few plates going. I met one girl who knocked my socks off, she was the hottest out of them all. I had banged my other plates but was fixated on getting in the pants of the hottest one. As a result of this I made the error of dropping the other ones and focusing all my attention on one.

Biggest mistake ever. Shit ended up going south with the one I really wanted. And she eventually ended up flaking on me a few times so I cut contact. Don't make the same mistake I did. Reciprocate the same attention she gives you.

[–]EvolvedVirus7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

Reciprocation is the key to good relations, and should always be appreciated when women do so.

It usually doesn't end well to overpursue even a mediocre-hottie. They very flaky and know what they can get.

[–]Endorsed ContributorFereallyRed28 points29 points  (16 children) | Copy

It's natural to want what you can't have.

She's using that to hook you.

And it's working.

Take the overview...why do you really want her?

[–]Ayethrowwybruv[S] 10 points11 points  (15 children) | Copy

I don’t know why. I think I’m getting more anxious and insecure because I’m losing my hair and I feel like I won’t be able to get hot bitches anymore with a shaved head. So it’s making me less confident

[–]animalapemachine6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy

u/Fereallyred is telling you she's playing "take away" to get you revved up. Imagine I am selling you an Acura lx. I tell you that you cannot afford this car. Then I take you over and show you one of the Honda Civics. It makes you want the original car even more.

The girl is telling you she doesn't want nothing serious which is the takeaway cuz that's what she does want. Then she gets you spinning and jumping like a monkey from hoops trying to prove yourself and how good of a quality male you actually are.

Then she's got you trying to please her, which is impossible cuz she moves the goalposts. She tells her friends how much of a fucking weak-ass faggot you are. And then tells you how sorry she feels for you because all you do is try to please her.

And brother I got to remind you that this whole game Dynamic is not about your hair.

[–]Ayethrowwybruv[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

So what should I do? Because I’m definitely not trying any harder to please her. That’s kind of why I’m confused. She’s into me but the reason she said she doesn’t want anything serious is because she doesn’t want to get hurt. She knew I was spinning plates at the beginning and that I didn’t give a fuck. Now I do give a fuck but it’s seems like the dynamic is changing and that makes me want to gtfo

[–]animalapemachine4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Q: what should you do?

A: do what YOU want.


the red pill is not a LAW dictated down from on high. rather, it is a praxeology: a study of action, conduct and behavior. the study of action gives you options how to live your life for the results you want.


are you going to hold back on living life due to fear of pain?

is that how our ancestors behaved?


everyone alive today is the descendant of a warrior who did not get killed 100, 500, 1000, 5000 years ago.

the losers and the dead did not breed. we are the sons of winners. it is your birthright to be the architect of your life.


sir, we are designed by nature to love our women and children with all our hearts. it's not a design flaw it is a feature. you are built and bred to love.

perhaps your journey as a Man requires you to experience the fullest expression of your own emotion. yes, scientifically our perception of life is nothing more than neurotransmitters zinging around in our brains and our "feelings" are phantoms sperged from hormone soup; however, do you want to live a life afraid of your own emotion?


refer to Heartiste's 16 commandments.

XVI.  Never be afraid to lose her

You must not fear. Fear is the love-killer. Fear is the ego-triumph that brings abject loneliness. You will face your fear. You will permit it to pass over and through you. And when your ego-fear is gone you will turn and face your lover, and only your heart will remain. You will walk away from her when she has violated your integrity, and you will let her walk when her heart is closed to you. She who can destroy you, controls you. Don’t give her that power over yourself. Love yourself before you love her.


Q: what should you do?

A: in short, don't drop your plates (love yourself), keep spinning the side girls while you focus on she whom you enjoy the most. feel all your emotions and experience the bliss that springs from your connection knowing that it is TEMPORARY (it will change, it will end).

Ride that Tiger.

[–]failingtheturingtest19 points20 points  (0 children) | Copy

"I feel like I won't be able to get jot bitches" is the antithesis of abundance.

You don't have an abundance mentality. You might have a few sheilas in the go, but you still have a scarcity mentality.

Nip that shit in the bud. Bald guys do not have a harder time. Fat, loser bald guys do. Keep fit, keep your frame, nothing will change.

Having hair won't help you if you are scared of losing on sheila.

[–]newlifeRP5 points6 points  (3 children) | Copy

I just read another question from a dude that had long hair his whole life and had just shaved his head.

His impression was that he projected a much more aggresive and dominant image, so no need to fear. If anything, shave and find out. I'm considering this myself (and I'm not even losing my hair).

Muscle + beard + shaved head = pussy magnet

[–]pussykiller0090 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Oh please!

[–]animalapemachine0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy


[–]rare_specimen_indeed0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I just posted above about how that happened to me too. I'm lean, tall, great beard, and now shaved head. Feelin good about it

[–]animalapemachine 1 points [recovered]  (4 children) | Copy

Pussy...u. r.

[–]Ayethrowwybruv[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Thanks man appreciate the solid advice

[–]animalapemachine0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Ok. More clearly your comment about going bald you need to check that. If women did not like bald-headed men it would have been bred out of the evolutionary chain a million years ago. But guess what... bald men are everywhere.

No matter what they say women fuck bald men. there are a lot of bald men around and they're all getting fucking laid so you can too... so stop being soft.

Men who worry about their hair are pussies. do you really think that men who have an important Mission are worried about their goddamn hair?

Was the world explored and conquered by sissy boys worried about their hair?

Do men have more important things to think about other than their hair?

There are guys who have lost their limbs in combat --there are guys who have lost their lives in combat, vets with amputations are accomplishing more than all of us put together

and yet we're having a conversation about your fucking hair

[–]EvolvedVirus6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

I love your comment and I don't mean to ruin everyone's dreams, but... Men bald after 30s and 40s. Evolution has nothing to do with it because men have for hundreds of thousands of years have died and bred before their 30s/40s. Also why you get more diseases/weakened system after 30s/40s.

But also why women love older men, because that's just really good genetics if you survive that long. So bald or not, you have advantages that 20-year-olds don't have. Let me tell you something... Toooooons of men live their entire 20s without getting laid much if at all.

The 20s are women's golden years, the 30s are men's. Tell me I'm wrong and you probably have a great body or face or just super good at game all the time.

they are accomplishing more than all of us put together

You're damn right!

[–]animalapemachine1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Solid argument. Props sir.

[–]rare_specimen_indeed0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I have a nice head of hair, always wore it a million different ways, and then the day i finally shaved it clean i got crazy positive responses from all girls, including my GF at the time. They loved it. Some girl at the bar nearly took me home because i looked so "dangerous"

[–]discohumpty4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Do whatever you want. Have fun. But always outcome independent. Yeah it might sting if it doesn't work out but always another "one", as in hot one, to pick up.

[–]Gordon-G5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

We’re all just one great blow-job from being pulled back on the Plantation!! Stay on your purpose... Its a Trap !!

[–]DerpJungler5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

No matter what, never commit to just one woman. And always be outcome dependent, if you choose to do so.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Recalibrate, live in such a way that if she ghosted you tomorrow, you wouldn’t be bothered because girls of similar caliber are on your radar... or better yet, focus on your missions to the degree that you don’t have time to think about pussy, drugs, booze and other vices

[–]Ayethrowwybruv[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Damn I wish it was as easy done as it is being said. Because you’re exactly right

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You learn the lesson the hard way once or twice and you’ll figure it out

[–]forsaken_in_the_dark1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think the key is to have infinite lives within finite time we are given and be looking from above with admiration.

Clinging to that one life despite it not being meant for you is a nature's trap as we think we desire something we can't have more.

But think what kind of shitty life you are going to have with all those red flags up your arse? Looking from above, would you admire that?

I have ignored many red flags and looking back, this was my biggest mistake in this life.

[–]zxcvb78091 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Until you realize that isn't dried tooth paste on her mouth when she shows up.

[–]hrm08941 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

If you truly have an abundance mindset (and understand female nature) you will never catch oneitis. Read the sidebar and improve yourself some more and you'll never get oneitis again.

These nasty hoes can't feel anything for you, so don't catch feelings for them. AWALT.

[–]WiredT0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Shes the “one you cant have so easily “ that’s probably why. Shes the hot one, shes the challenge

[–]uptimex0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Have the same problem. I think it is because of two variables she is the hottest + she doesn't give as much attention to you as you want.

I personally found the solution in detecting her interest:

  1. you feel that she is not quite much interested
  2. you do several attempts to gain her interest (including giving her IOIs or negs, IOD etc. )
  3. you detect if you gained her interest or not
  4. if not, just do nothing, stay where you are and do nothing, and detect if she wants to communicate with you as a friend, if yes - just go away, if nothing happens - go away, if you feel "more than friends interest" you can dive in

[–]2INNASKILLZ2K180 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You're in her frame, brother. Sounds like she's the one dictating the terms.

You MUST have less investment than her. You MUST need her less than she needs you.

You need to kill your emotional investment ASAP.

The second you give a shit that she doesn't want anything more serious, is the second you lose.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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