Girlfriend fuxked a whole frat house right before we met

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June 13, 2016

Basically found out that my "I swear im not a slut!" girlfriend fucked a whole frat house after a night where she was 'only going to hang out with someone and it just happened' except that someone was the very first guy she fucked so him and like 3 other of his frat brothers in one night, just 2ish weeks before meeting me. She swears it was a mistake and shes sorry and only wants me but I cant even look at her without seeing her getting railed facedown ass up by all of alpha beta kappa. do i run? i really do like her and want to be with her but fuck

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Title Girlfriend fuxked a whole frat house right before we met
Upvotes 73
Comments 149
Date 13 June 2016 01:17 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit askTRP
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[–]TRP VanguardArchwinger186 points187 points  (42 children) | Copy

I'm sure she was very forthcoming about her sexual history and this wasn't concealed from you - she was the one who told you all about this without any pressure, right?

No? You mean she concealed her slutty past to con you into thinking you were dating a non-slut? Then, when you found out through other channels, only then did she explain that since this was a "mistake", it doesn't really matter and that's why she never told you?

Hmm. I wonder how many other things that don't really count she's done.

You can't LTR a lying slut. Fuck only. Non-exclusively.

[–]BPasFuck45 points46 points  (3 children) | Copy

Boom. This is the thing right here. Double-damn guarantee OP is only at the tippy-tip of that slutty iceberg.

[–]The_Wisconsonite19 points20 points  (0 children) | Copy

"Just kisses...and some tippy-tips" -Lying Slut

[–]JourneymanTRP8 points9 points  (1 child) | Copy

For someone inexperienced, he'd be better off going no contact instead of trying to plate her.

[–]thrway13123 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Agree if he's incapable of remaining uninvested; otherwise I see no point in dropping an opportunity to improve plate game

[–]Yoji_848 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

This, and never forget to wear a condom.

[–]FlamingCucumber1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

No one can say it better

[–][deleted] 3 points3 points | Copy

[permanently deleted]

[–]TRP VanguardArchwinger22 points23 points  (31 children) | Copy

Some guys really like relationships. If you're one of those guys, do what girls do. Have a never-ending string of STRs. Once things start getting to be more trouble than they're worth (e.g., once you start getting shit tested out the ass and the relationship stops being sex-on-tap, or once she starts acting shady and probably cheating or putting out feelers for other options), end things immediately. No conversation, no debate, no reasons, just tell her "not working out".

Then move on to the next STR. Possibly plate her or another one (or more) of your exes in between relationships.

[–]ShreckOpener880 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Spot on the point there LAD

[–]PantsonFire12340 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

This girl already proved to him that she doesn't give a shit about staying truthful. So what's to stop her from banging Chads on her off-days.

Zero mercy, end relationship right away. Say nothing more than "This isn't working for me, you are not my type after all". End of all communication.


[–]menial_optimist0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Would her at 17 dating a 27 year old coke dealer be considered slutty?

[–]Butcherboy8645 points46 points  (2 children) | Copy



Hard next. Trust me. BP butch tried doing what you are proposing.


Get the fuck out. If you've got the feels for this broad, you probably won't be able to plate. Put her in the rear view. Go out and fuck 10 women.

Avoid LTRs, unless you want to do some fucking M&A level due diligence.

[–]waspynerd6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

What do you mean by M&A? Mergers and Acquisitions?

[–]mty_green_go2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Lmfao, yes that must be it

[–]TheStumblingWolf73 points74 points  (1 child) | Copy

She's sorry you found out, not sorry she did it.

[–]someboringdude25 points26 points  (0 children) | Copy

do i run?


[–][deleted] 19 points20 points  (0 children) | Copy

The milk is free. If you can get it for free, drink it, why not?

If she tries to up the price...well


I live with her

Scratch that. You already fucked up. Next and GFTOW

[–]quicklogaccount12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy

I cant even look at her without seeing her getting railed facedown ass up by all of alpha beta kappa.

This image will take months to wear off. And it'll come back the moment your confidence blinks. She needs to be a very special woman that understands and works actively towards this never happening.
But she lied about it, so, she's probably not this special person.

I strongly advise you to have her moving out. Just don't use the fact and "I can't look at her" as the grounds for it. Just tell her you see no future. If she demands more, tell her she lied.

[–]ktchong10 points11 points  (6 children) | Copy

Do you seriously need to ask us to do with that girl??!?

Just know that you will be the laughing stock of the all those frat boys if you stay with her. And they are frat boys, so they will tell many other guys that they gang banged her (if they have not already.)

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (5 children) | Copy

Luckily for me it was at a different school then ours and Im pretty sure they all graduated now and moved away. But I still know it happened and I know I'd be laughing at me too if i saw myself with her from a 3rd perspective

[–]ktchong8 points9 points  (1 child) | Copy

You just want to be careful with any potential trick that she may use to keep you. She knows that you found out about her gang bang, so she should expect that you are ready to dump her. Many girls in her position will try to get knocked up as a way to keep you. She has already proven that she can be very deceitful. So you want to watch out for that.

[–]sqerl5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Many girls in her position will try to get knocked up as a way to keep you.

This is worth repeating....

[–]Yoji_847 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

Luckily for me

Does not compute. In no way does this situation and those words can come together. EVER.

[–]Late30sMasculist3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

If it bothers you as much as you say, then you should dump her. There's not much you or she can do to change the past and it doesn't sound like you'll be able to "get over it."

I'm dying to know, if this happened at another school, how did you find out about it?

[–]flatox1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Geez remember to relax that fucking hamster of your or it will die from exhaustion.

[–]Senior EndorsedVasiliyZaitzev11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think you mean your EX-girlfriend.


[–]Endorsed Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

If your bed was swarming with bedbugs would you lay around in it hoping for the best or would you get the fuck outa there?

[–]Andorli6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don't get into LTR with her, don't be exclusive with her. Just plate her and have fun.

[–]hamsterbator6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

sorry bro. you'll never be able to unsee it. plate her.

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (16 children) | Copy

As long as she's as much of a slut for you than those frat guys there's no reason why you can't have a little fun of your own.

Just don't catch the feels and demote her to plate. Fuck other girls.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (15 children) | Copy

well she hasnt even fucked me that many times in one night for one. and as i said it was with the first guy she ever banged who shes hooked up with repeatedly over the years since then despite other boyfriends, only stopping after that night where she fucked his whole frat because she was too embarrassed to go back to him again after

[–]TRP VanguardArchwinger18 points19 points  (4 children) | Copy

Wait.. So this girl has been hooking up with an ex. She's a casual sex slut.

You knew this. And you made her a girlfriend? You reap what you sow.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy

I didnt know until recently. If I'd known sooner this would be a lot simpler.

[–]TRP VanguardArchwinger27 points28 points  (1 child) | Copy

It's really simple. You don't LTR casual sex sluts. You have casual sex with them.

Just tell her it's not working out and move on. No explanation. No debate. No argument. If she comes crawling back in a few days, fuck her, but don't date her again. Repeat as many times as she'll let you. You get to become the ex she's hooking up with and let her slut past be her next boyfriend's problem.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

This, this and a thousand times this.

[–]yumyumgivemesome1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You're not married or engaged to her. This is really quite simple.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (9 children) | Copy

Still a plate, do not STR, do not LTR, do not pass go and collect $200.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (8 children) | Copy

we've already been long term is the problem. I live with her.

[–]Senior EndorsedVasiliyZaitzev15 points16 points  (0 children) | Copy

we've already been long term is the problem. I live with her.

Iron Rule of Tomassi #4

NEVER under any circumstance live with a woman you aren’t married to or are not planning to marry in within 6 months.

[–]legion3273 points4 points  (6 children) | Copy

Based on other comments, you already caught feels for her and you seem unwilling to demote her to plate since you live together. (So she would obviously notice if you brought another girl home.) That said, your best bet is to find somewhere else to live or tell her to find somewhere else to live depending upon whose name is on the lease for your place. If you can't even look at her or talk to her, that's a sure indicator that you need to bail.

I looked at your post history and found your post in r/ relationships regarding her studying abroad 4 months ago. You talk about how you were staring at her texts over and over because you're so hung up on this girl. You need to move the fuck on. You're also exhibiting strong beta traits so you're in the right place to try to sort that out too.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (5 children) | Copy

the study abroad lart is one the reasons I feel like this is so hard. i feel like i'll have wasted all that time now that i had just gotten her back. and it sounds like it wouldnt, but her being gone actually let us connect a ton because all we had was talking about everything for those months. shes pretty much my best friend.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy

You can cut your losses now or get heartbroken later, your choice

[–]legion3276 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

What you're describing is called "sunk cost fallacy." Read this

[–]Caucasian-African0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

How did you find out what she did at the frat? Who did you hear it from?

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy

You're a faggot

[–][deleted]  (5 children) | Copy


[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

We already are/have been long term which is my problem. I live with her. I want to be with her but I cant even fucking look at her or talk to her without feeling disgusted.

[–]aDrunkenWhaler2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

'I want to be with her'

Jesus, your stupid... enjoy your honeymoon!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

How long have you been together?

[–]BenjiDread0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

The "her" you're talking about is the "her" that she lets you see. Why would you continue to be in a relationship with someone you can't stand to look at or talk to anymore?

[–]nastynickdr3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Not LTR material. She lied to your face, made you belive she is something she is not, and theres prob a lot more that you dont even dream about. What she should have done is be open about her past if you asked about it, and then you could decide if you would accept it or not. But, meh, lying is a lot more easier.

Yeah you have feelings for her, yeah you live with her, but its better to cut it now than later.

[–]MeatCurtainRod3 points4 points  (15 children) | Copy

She is broken. And a liar.

Trust us on this. Hitler didn't turn evil overnight. It took him many years of baby steps of following an idea, and then over years of doing things worse and worse, it was all of a sudden easy to do full blown genocide.

There is no difference with this girl. It takes one innocent step, one exciting kiss or blowjob. The next step is easier, up the ass or with two guys. Over time, she follows the path, because it gets easier and easier to do something that ethically and morally goes against her. So now, she has no problems fucking an entire gang of dudes in one night.

So yes, she is broken. Contrary to popular belief and movies, girls like this are broken and cannot be fixed. Years of extreme fun will and DO permanently damage a person. We all know this, which is why they want to keep their past a secret. They want their cake and to eat it too.

But this isn't about her. It's about you. You need some self respect. And fucking her unprotected is kinda risky.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (7 children) | Copy

So yes, she is broken. Contrary to popular belief and movies, girls like this are broken and cannot be fixed.

My brother is a psychiatrist. He agrees.

[–]MeatCurtainRod1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

My sister is too, and even one of my lesbian friends who has a specialty in youth behavioral sciences also says the same thing.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (4 children) | Copy

Men like me have to watch out. I like to help people. Sometimes we want to "save" a girl from a bad situation, or rescue her from a shit life. Can't think like that. Chivalry died for a reason; Women killed it.

[–]boning1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

Save them from what. At the top of every slut's fear list is BOREDOM. Boredom brings time for self-reflection.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

A bad life, I guess. You can't save somebody from themselves. Don't bother trying. I fell into that trap one too many times.

Help a girl out with whatever;

Watch her date somebody else.

No more of that. Next girl who wants help from me, she can get it from her dreamy biker.

[–]boning0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Why help someone who does not want it. Especially if they are prone to self-sabatage.

Read up about the sunk cost fallacy:

Your time and energy is far too valuable to be invested in a lost cause.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I agree. This is a mistake I have yet to make 100%. I say 100% because I did attempt to stay with a girl who I knew had problems. But eventually it was just so frustrating I had to end it or go insane. Or in her case, convert to Judaism. (she wasn't Jewish, thats how crazy she is) five years after we break up, she's a Mormon.

[–]Ika-1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I am a psychologist and I would say that they can be fixed, but for that happen they need to get professional help. This is the part that makes fixing her impossible, since she will not seek this help, but seek the D instead

[–][deleted]  (6 children) | Copy


[–]MeatCurtainRod4 points5 points  (5 children) | Copy

Some women are broken faster and sooner than others. Some women don't break at all. Let's not use a generalization argument to this one anecdotal situation.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (4 children) | Copy

and some women have self control.

[–]MeatCurtainRod1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy


[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

What does TRP think of David Deangelo?

[–]MeatCurtainRod0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

He is the dude who brought me into theredpill light before reddit and before it was theredpill. This was almost a decade ago. He has some solid ideals that match with a lot of the sidebar theories.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Ok. I have his DVDs, didn't watch them yet. They were a hand down from my brother.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Basically this.

[–]TheRedStoic3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Drop her.

Since you live with Her, start making plans to move out, find a sublease, replace yourself. If you continue fucking control the condoms and dispose of them yourself, I recommend some Tabasco sauce in them when you toss them, this kind of discovery often makes girls resort to dropping a baby anchor in order to tie you down.

You already said you'd laugh at yourself from 3rd person perspective, you obviously know staying with her as anything more than a plate is completely self respectless.

Move on. The mental image will never go away, the respect is already broken, repairing it doesn't happen -only temporarily forgetting it. It'll always resurface.

[–]Il1282 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Just remember all the times you went down on her? Yeah, you were probably eating another man's spunk. Next her.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (4 children) | Copy

Just keep in mind that this is the story of pretty much every attractive girl that has been to college. If you keep looking for unicorns, you'll just "swap six for half-a-dozen".

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (3 children) | Copy

This is one piece Im having trouble understanding. Most, if not all or close to all, girls are sluts. So why not pick the one Ive already been with a long time and meets every other criteria for being my girlfriend. I just am in shock and disgusted and trying to see if others with experience can judge whether its worth trying to get over for, but I think the majority rule of leaving is starting to break into my head.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

You're having trouble because right now you're thinking: should I bet my heart and life on this here horse that is missing one leg, or that other horse that can't run straight?

And of course the answer is the third option: you don't bet on any of the horses. You understand that both horses - all horses - are potentially fucked up and betting on this rigged horse racing is a bad bet in general, so you just watch the race and have fun without betting your life savings on any one horse.

This girl you're so crazy about, you already said that she was dating other guys and cheating on those guys with her first boyfriend. Is this a sign of someone stable? Someone you should emotionally attach yourself to? Bet your heart on? You are already infatuated with her, that's why your heart is divided like this and you can't think straight. This girl is NOT the kind of girl you want to emotionally tie yourself with and YOU FUCKING KNOW IT, your gut is ripping apart telling you this, that's why you're divided.

So here's my suggestion to you: you already know that "most if not close to all girls are sluts" and you're wondering how you're gonna pick THE ONE lesser slut. The answer is that you DONT PICK ANYONE - pick all of them. Don't tie yourself emotionally to some unstable slut that's gonna be thinking back about her frat house spitroast to get wet when having sex with you - treat her like the creature she is: a human being with flaws, someone that has cheated on other boyfriends before and will cheat on you. So knowing that, have fun with her, fuck her, make her choke on your dick for all your heart's pleasure, but you don't BUY THE DAMN THREE-LEGGED HORSE. Forget her on an emotional level - and the best way to do this is to get other girls, so you'll see she's not the special snowflake you think she is.

[–]Caucasian-African0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

God dammit! I wish this ^ wasn't great advice. But it is great advice.

[–]i_forget_my_userids0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

So why not pick the one Ive already been with a long time and meets every other criteria for being my girlfriend.

I'm about to step back from TRP advice for a second, because you're asking an interesting question here that I have thought about myself before.

"Better the devil you know than the devil you don't."

If you insist on having a relationship, no girl you date will be a saint. Nearly every girl lies about how many dicks they've handled. This story from before you met her has nothing to do with your relationship with her.

If you think pressing forward is what you insist on, TRP advice on how to do that would be to stop talking about it altogether with her. If she brings it up, just say "I'm dropping it." Actually let it go, because it has zero to do with the context of your relationship. Judge her actions in the relationship and trust your gut. Never stop improving yourself. Maybe fuck someone on the side.

If you want TRP advice about what to do in general, detach and demote to plate.

[–]Endorsed Contributorbalalasaurus3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

You've been told to leave and you should. As for your living situation, how long is the lease up for?

If I was you, I'd speak to your landlord about and explain the situation. If you can find someone to take the place over, most landlords will be understanding enough to get you out of the lease. Just say things aren't working out between you two anymore and staying together is not an option.

In the meantime, you should have a bro you can hit up for a place to stay. The longer you stay in that house the more damage you do to yourself.

She is trash and you shouldn't be living with trash.

[–]frerri2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Start to acknowledge girls love sex and spin plates until you've felt REAL abundance then consider upgrading your best plate to LTR status.

[–]walkingthelinux2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

If you stay with her, expect all of the respect you deserve.

[–]Auphor_Phaksache2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

She dont wanna be saved dont save her

[–]TheBeardedMarxist2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

"Your girlfriend sucked 37 dicks.... In a row?"

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

You wanna get over this? Date a few strippers...

Easiest way.

[–]RedPillMeditations2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Get out. Leave her. It's gonna hurt you, because you're already so invested. You said you live with her. Find a way out. End it. You can lost a lot of shit in this life, but not your dignity. Get out now, go fuck a bunch of other girls, and you'll be so happy you left when you did.

[–]TRP VanguardWhisper2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

You misspelled "ex-girlfriend".

[–]emein2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

4 guys isn't the entire house. It was before you she met you. At the very least you know you can get some swinging action in if you play your cards right.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (9 children) | Copy

Also I live with her which complicates things since I can barely look at/talk to her. And I should mention it wasnt a gangbang, it was more like she fuxked the first one to hit on her, then a break, then fucked the next, and basically repeated until she got through all of them. I just am disgusted.

[–][deleted] 23 points24 points  (0 children) | Copy

Dude. This story hit me right in the gut. This will be hard to hear, but if you stay with her you deserve zero respect and will eventually have no self respect because you'll at least subconsciously know that you're with a nasty whore and that your behavior is not respectable. Maybe she wants you right now, but the moment things turn she'll be fantasizing about dicks of every shape and color in every orifice of her body. She doesn't regret what she did. She thinks it's hot. She regrets that you know.

Please leave. It's easiest to leave when the wound is fresh. If you stick with her it only gets worse. Trust me.

[–]Interweb_OD4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

How the fuck did you end up living with her? Did it (living) happen before or after you were a thing? Either way you fucked up. Dont shit where you eat.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

We've been dating for a while. Started living with each other because we were together all the time anyway. I then just recently found put about this a few days ago.

[–]Interweb_OD6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'll say it again, as other people have: Hard next. Asap. Sort out housing and dont fall for shit tests. The past is an indication of the future and that is something I live by.

[–]Pillredpopper3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

So she didn't get gang-banged, she got the train ran on her... Result is still the same, move out and move on.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Why the fuck do you live with your girlfriend? How dumb are you?

How long have you been with this girl?

You're fucking up in all kinds of ways

[–]flatox1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

you need a serious fucking wakeup call dude. And she told you there were 3? Do you remember what we tell you about women and them talking about numbers? you need to read the sidebar. And if you believe you've already done so, then you plainly just don't understand it.

[–]BenjiDread0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Move out. Do you really want to live with this person? What else has she done that she hasn't told you about? Get out now before it gets worse.

[–]yumyumgivemesome0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I fail to see a meaningful distinction.

[–]casemodsalt4 points5 points  (9 children) | Copy

If you like her and she is cool and seems genuine then try to ignore it.

Can you say you wouldn't want to bang 4 sorority sisters if you all happened to get drunk together and they basically throw themselves on you?

Men and women are both capable of being sluts AND faithful. Just try to look for odd behavior. Usually if it seems even slightly odd, something is up and should be a good sign

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Except a guy that did that is likely a stud and not some damaged chicken head that got passed like a blunt then laughed about.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (7 children) | Copy

This is the thing, besides this whole situation she's never given me any reason to doubt her or question her 'ethics', she's always made me happy and I'm a better person around her. We just went through a long distance stint where we really grew together and I just got her back. If I lost her now I know I'd be losing my best friend.

Despite all that, this whole scenario has just really left me checked out. I cannot look at or talk to her without picturing it and feeling disgusted. I just can't even fathom how you just pass yourself around a frat house like that. Sure I might hook up with sorority sluts one after another if it was presented but as a man I would have to work for it, earn it. She literally just had to throw herself around like the frat cum dumpster.

Even beyond that it was with her very first boyfriend that she's hooked up with multiple times even when she's had other boyfriends in between. So I feel like if anything I ever do upsets her she is just going to go right back to him again, unless she's too embarrassed since she fucked all his frat brothers. All this not to mention the fact it happened literally just a couple weeks before we met and started dating. I feel like a laughing stock and like I'm just scrounging for leftovers since she hasn't even ever fucked me that many times in one night. My respect for her is just.. gone.

[–]Caucasian-African0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

"So I feel like if anything I ever do upsets her she is just going to go right back to him again, unless she's too embarrassed since she fucked all his frat brothers."

Exactly! She would probably go back that easily, and you probably wouldn't even know about it!

How did you find out about her escapades?

[–]casemodsalt-3 points-2 points  (4 children) | Copy

Well my only comparison is the one I already said.

Would you have a 3 some with 2 women? Would you let 4 women have their way with you?

If a girl came up to you and asked to bang, would you?

Don't judge girls based on human nature. Sex is not a big deal.

Maybe talk to her about this. Seriously. You can also judge her body language and see if she seems like she's lying or truthful.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

Sorry, i just added a line addressing that to my previous comment, but yes if given the oppurtunity I probably would hook up with mutiple sorority sisters in one night. But as a man Id have to work for it and earn it, not just throw myself around and spread my legs open for the whole frat house to dominate as a cum dumpster and I surely wouldnt go looking for a boyfriend just a couple weeks after degrading myself as such.

And yea casual sex may not be important to some but in a LTR I do want it to be meaningful. I dont want to feel like another guy she's just giving it up to. I want to feel like she wants me and that the sex connects us in atleast some way.

[–]Caucasian-African0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Unfortunately, it seems like you are just another guy she is giving it up to. Some people may try to shame you for feeling as you do, but I like to call that gut feeling you're having "men's intuition". (That's right, men are entitiled to have "intuition", too). You know what feels right in your gut and what doesn't. Learn to listen to your instincts, whatever they tell you. It's something everyone should cultivate. That is all that matters. Personally, I would bounce, but it's not my choice and you need to do what you are comfortable with. Don't be ashamed to have standards for yourself, and for those you surround yourself with. People like to say "the past is the past", and it doesn't matter. We all know that is bull*hit.

As much as some weirdos and SJW types try to deny it, men and women are fundamentally different. A man sexing his way around a sorority house is completely different than a woman making her way around a frat house. Women are the gatekeepers to sex, like it or not. People can bitch all they want about "double standards", "social constructs", and other bullsh*t, but nearly everyone, man or woman, who is honest with themselves will acknowledge that those two scenarios are completely different.

Whatever you decide, I wish you the best of luck.

[–]casemodsalt0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Sorry, i just added a line addressing that to my previous comment, but yes if given the oppurtunity I probably would hook up with mutiple sorority sisters in one night. But as a man Id have to work for it and earn it

But hypothetically, if you didn't have to really work for it. Imagine a porn scenario, but not as corny. Imagine a world where women weren't as shy about sex or approaching men first.

not just throw myself around and spread my legs open for the whole frat house to dominate as a cum dumpster and I surely wouldnt go looking for a boyfriend just a couple weeks after degrading myself as such.

Do you know how it went down though? Might want to ask the guys who banged her, or better yet just ask her and tell her to be honest and talk to her about what she wants. Just tell her that you just want her to be honest with you about it and that if she truly does want something meaningfull, she needs to just be honest about everything.

And yea casual sex may not be important to some but in a LTR I do want it to be meaningful. I dont want to feel like another guy she's just giving it up to. I want to feel like she wants me and that the sex connects us in atleast some way.

Tell her all that. Tbh the roles are reversed these days and men who want to settle down are getting the short end of the stick...women are doing what players have done to them - used them for sex. It's a vicious cycle and I've seen it happen personally.

The truth is, do you feel experienced enough to judge her actions/body language and make an accurate assessment? Because it's very hard to really understand what someone truly thinks or wants. But in general, the dumber ones usually are not as good at being slick.

A few signs to look for:

Avoids eye contact.

Has resting bitch face. (Looks bored, annoyed, etc)

Makes excuses.

Of course these are fairly general and it's up to you to assess your specific situation.

As a final thought, I would say try not to fall too much in love until you know what her intentions are. And for fucks sake, talk to her about this stuff! I know it's hard for us guys to be emotional and talk about our feelings, but believe it or not, long term relationships usually work because the guy is open and honest. Confident with himself. Boys are typically shy, and not open with their feelings. A good woman will appreciate a man who is open about himself.

But never forget...she did bang 4 guys at you can't really get that image out of your head and it really sucks when you care about one girl. I know how you must feel bro. Nobody is perfect and there are many girls out there

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Men and women are different and sex is a big deal.

[–]MrGoodStuff051 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I can guarantee you that this feeling won't go away. Cut your losses and let this be a lesson to you on how women feel once they see you as weak or beta. The same way you can't let go of her being a slut is how women can't let go of you being weak. Learn from her mistakes.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Honestly I would just ignore her and pretend she doesn't exist. If I were you I wouldn't care less and I believe you SHOULD try to feel the same.

[–]selfsufficientnigga1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Keep using her for sex. Tell her she's on a probation period now until you feel you can trust her, and from then on just keep fucking her without wasting your resources on her.

As soon as she balks, complains or whatever, inform her that she has failed the test, and to get lost.

Have every intercourse recorded, because of possibility of false rape claim.

[–]top-notch-alpha1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I've been in your shoes before... You just cant let her go because shes beautiful to you. Let me tell you something buddy, that though thats in your head of your girl getting big balls clapped on her clit while getting donkey punched by young ripped dudes will never go away. 1, 2, 8 years together it will still be there. When shes not around and your home alone or at a party drinking even when your mad at her this image will pop up. In conusion its not worth it.

[–]The-Ban-Hammer0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Run, unless you like the fact that any effort you put in for her is still more than an entire frat house had to put in in just one night. Or, maybe you have cuckold fantasies.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

How long have you two been together before you found out? There's no amount of time that will mean you should stay with her, but I think it makes for a good cautionary tale.

[–]ecosci0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy


[–]PantsonFire12340 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It looks like you finally found that quality woman

[–]xamcali0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I'm not even that redpill and this sounds idiotic and not even worth asking jeezus

Drop her like a rock

[–]prodigy2throw0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Lol. Your just got burned. Learn from this. Really.

There are no unicorns. You're only question here should be what lifting program is best and how to day game.

[–]r6_rider0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy


[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Marriage material, then?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

LOL, might as well marry her if you're even considering things.

[–]jtzabor0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thats not your girlfriend thats the Frat bicycle.

[–]Ali_s19870 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

First- Get yourself tested. Second- Dump her.

[–]flatox0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I love it when people come here asking for advice when it is so clear that they already know the answer but just don't want to see it.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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