The most frustrating thing just happened...

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May 16, 2019

I was hooking up with this new girl and I was driving her wild. I was teasing the shit out of her and she was wet. She was trying to make me wait to have sex but she eventually gave in, but at this point i was tired as shit. It was 2:30AM and I had a pretty long day. I pull my dick out and it went soft. It fucking sucked. She still wants another date with me. She was pretty understanding saying that I looked pretty tired but kept teasing me by saying that I was all talk. Anybody else have stories like this or any tips on how to shake off this frustration?

Post Information
Title The most frustrating thing just happened...
Author thankyouhaveanice
Upvotes 95
Comments 85
Date 16 May 2019 10:08 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askTRP
Original Link
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[–]StopGaming1234131 points132 points  (14 children) | Copy

Happened to me multiple times. It's always when it's with a new girl. Sucks, but stopping porn helped a lot.

[–]dtyler8635 points36 points  (9 children) | Copy


[–]StopGaming123418 points19 points  (0 children) | Copy

I am honestly surprised with how calm girls react to it. Many even tell me it's not their first time happening. Usually we hook up again and 2nd time it works.

[–]dark_dragoon104 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

I've found not giving a fuck about having sex and feeling really confident / idgaf / having fun in the moment made fuck like a champion on the first date and had the girls messaging me after for more. I'm assuming this is what you want yeah?

[–]rnsbrum6 points7 points  (4 children) | Copy

If you nofap for three days you will cum in one minute

[–]Red_Pill_Brotherhood17 points18 points  (0 children) | Copy

Not true for everyone.

[–]StopGaming12345 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy

Not true. I can smash them raw for an hour and not cum. I ruined myself with the help of porn & grip of death.

[–]rnsbrum4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy


[–]StopGaming12345 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Nothing worse than getting soft while inside of her lmao

[–]AGameofTrolls1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Look, in my personal experience I discovered that faping the days before gets my dick ready, and when I don't I can hardly get it up and I struggle to do the deed. I'm also type 1 diabetic and that age takes a toll on me. When ever I go monk mode it doesn't work in my particular case.

[–]StopGaming12342 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I guess we all have some ways that make it work best for us. I notice a performance boost if I don't fap days prior.

[–]thankyouhaveanice 1 points [recovered]  (3 children) | Copy

Funny thing is I'm well aware of nofap and have a fairly healthy balance of fapping. This is what is frustrating me because I thought that would be the solution from this happening. I've been exercising and dieting well on the regular and I haven't fapped in over a week. I'm thinking maybe I should start implementing fapping with just my imagination.

[–]StopGaming12340 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Try not fapping at all. I know it's hard, but atleast you can get some unsolved questions answered.

There is also a high chance that it's all psychological. I always thought I had a problem until someone asked me whether I can get hard on porn. Infact I get hard on porn 100% of all times. Which made me realize that it must be a psychological problem and performance anxiety instead of an actual physical problem.

[–]thankyouhaveanice 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy

With my own experimentation with nofap, I've noticed that sometimes fapping helps my sex drive to be more consistent in some cases. There was one time where I didn't fap for a couple months and I didn't think of sex for a good period, then it all came in a big rush out of no where. I've noticed fapping once a week keeps it in my mind but also allows me to practice self control. Is there an actual study on what is best for your sex drive?

[–]StopGaming12340 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Once in a while is not bad. It's actuallyconsidered healthy. It only becomes a problem if it's something you do out of boredom and multiple times per day.

Find out what works best for yourself.

[–]laserdicks74 points75 points  (8 children) | Copy

at this point i was tired as shit. It was 2:30AM and I had a pretty long day

Difficult as it is to avoid adding to a sunk cost, sometimes you gotta call it - secure in your knowledge that there is an abundance of other women out there for next time.

I don't care where I am or who I'm with - at 2am I'm going home and to sleep. You pay for those extra hours at night for the next week. They aren't free and time is expensive.

[–]marcus8crassus15 points16 points  (0 children) | Copy

This. Time is the one thing you can’t get back.

[–]slamdunktiger862 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

username checks out like a mofo

[–]thankyouhaveanice 1 points [recovered]  (5 children) | Copy

Yeah this is probably the lesson I learned from this. You want to fuck the girl like you're a super human, but you honestly got to listen to your body when you're tired and save it for when your body does feel super.

[–]laserdicks1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Also, why shouldn't she fuck YOU like she's a superhuman?

[–]DerpJungler-1 points0 points  (3 children) | Copy

you honestly got to listen to your body when you're tired and save it for when your body does feel super.

Not trying to be a dick but how old are you? And do you lift consistently? One thing i've learned through lifting for many years is that pushing your limits is one of the best feelings, especially when combined with orgasm(s). If she's hot and she turns you on, you can find a way. What I did in some cases, is ask a girl to give me a mild blowjob, it's like fuel for me. However, I get that sometimes you're out of it. if that's the case, you should call it off, accept the responsibility of her ghosting you (worst case scenario) and then proceed to post here asking "where did it go wrong?".

My point: You're a man. When she wants it and you want it, you get it done. That's confidence gained.

[–]thankyouhaveanice 1 points [recovered]  (2 children) | Copy

I am in my 20's so it's not an issue of age. You know, I recently stopped lifting because I started doing MMA training instead. But now I am thinking I should start lifting again. (Do you recommend any lifts in particular that boosts testoserone/libido?) It's also not that I wasn't able to get hard at all. I literally kept a hard for like 2-3 hours of foreplay and was teasing her and she felt it. But then she finally couldn't restrict herself and that was the moment I gassed out. I've also been up for 18 hours at that point so I was generally just tired as well. It was really just a matter of bad timing.

[–]DerpJungler0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

There's no reason to make excuses, you look like you're looking for validation. That's a big NO from TRP.

I think you still have a lot to learn brother, but you're in the right path. My advice is simple, keep reading the sidebar, practice abundance and IDGAF mentality. That way, nothing will ever put you down and you won't need to make excuses to random dudes on the internet, like me. And yes, get back to lifting, even casually. Like 3-4 times per week is enough. Focus on Flat/Incline Bench press, Overhead Dumbbell Press, Squats, Pull ups and then different exercises you enjoy (to hit all muscle groups). It's simple. Good life is created through your choices.

[–]Helpcalculus20 points21 points  (1 child) | Copy

Just 2 weeks ago I hoocked up with a girl in Moscow. Vacation tires the fuck out of you and I wasn't feeling like fucking at all. She told me to come over and I thought fuck, I'm about to give her a "meh" sex.

I had 70% dick the whole time, but there's so much more you can do, that bitches don't care if your dick isn't rock hard. Chocking, slapping, fingering, scratching, scratching with unwrapped condom wrapper, etc. Use your imagination and don't let it get to your head.

Make sure you give her good dicking the next time.

[–]RevolutionaryPea733 points34 points  (9 children) | Copy

Happens to the best of us. I was having a threesome and went soft because it was too strange. Only thing you can do is laugh about it.

[–]SupremeBBC3 points4 points  (7 children) | Copy

2M1F or 2F1M? The former would definitely make me soft. My brother and I once had a threesome with this chick and it was kinda hard to stay hard with his cock in my vicinity.

[–]RevolutionaryPea75 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

2F1M. The good type, sadly. The girls were hot, but many things were "off" about that evening not least of which my brain was basically trying to work out how to have sex again because the dynamics of having a threesome are totally different...

[–]LSDparade1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

lmao I couldn't do that myself

[–]SupremeBBC2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

I gave it a go and told him never again lol

[–]LSDparade0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Was his dick bigger than yours?

[–]SupremeBBC2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Yeah but that wasn't the reason it was awkward. It was more so the sharing of a woman with him. Sounded great in theory but not in application.

[–]DerpJungler0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Shit man, your relationship with your brother must be cool at least. My relationship with my brother is super awkward but casual.

I would NEVER had a threesome with him. He's also 100% blue pilled so there's that..

[–]SupremeBBC0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah it's pretty lit dude. No animosity or dick measuring. Unwavering support of one another. In fact he's been red pill longer than I have, and it took my two year relationship with my ex to see women for what they really are (he advised me to run within months of making her my LTR, but my blue pill self was pretty strong and I was full oneitis mode). Unfortunately he's also a bit of an alcoholic but we all have our demons lol.

[–]somebullshitrp1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

The same thing happened to me last night. I was watching my girl eat another girl's pussy, and I just couldn't get it up, even though it was hot as fuck.

It usually isn't an issue after the first couple times

[–]FREECRACK66 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Just laugh it off and pretend like it never happened

[–]BIitheFooI7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

I’ve had this problem with whom is now my favorite plate. Stop porn and definitely don’t masturbate a few days before seeing her. Also, it may be a comfort thing. I had trouble getting hard with her on and off for 2 months after we started having sex - she was my first plate after exiting a 7 year LTR.

The key is you need to make her orgasm with your fingers on her clit or G spot, or use your mouth. This is essential to retaining the plate if you care. Just make eye contact with her while you make her orgasm via her G spot - she’ll never say you’re all talk again.

Now that we’re more comfortable I can get hard at 3AM and fuck her brains out in my car AFTER hitting the gym. Just did so Monday night. This only ever happens with a new girl for me...

[–]poundaweek16 points17 points  (10 children) | Copy

L-arginine dude. Take 1000mg x2 daily and you’ll never be soft again

[–]FREECRACK611 points12 points  (3 children) | Copy

Weird I started taking arginine this week, didn’t help my dick but my gym pumps got insanely better

[–]askmrcia0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Surprised this didn't help. That shit had me hard for the next four days and made me super horny.

Did you drink plenty of water? Drink a lot of water and it should help tremendously.

[–]FREECRACK61 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Yeah I do, probably like 5 litres a day. I don’t have any problems getting hard tho so it could be working and I don’t notice it. For you is it like viagra in the sense that it works straight on your dick or does it only aid if you are already getting hard? No homo lmaoo

[–]askmrcia0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I think its more when I'm getting aroused then I'll get an erection.

I never took viagra, but I'm guessing it works as soon as you take it you get an erection.

L Arginine works where you take it, but you won't notice it's effects until you get an erection. So you'll notice it when something gets you aroused.

[–]Stargazer347 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

Even better - just take Citrulline Malate. Much better and converts to L arginine anyways but better absorption. Doing this currently and dick is rock hard

[–]Blaze-Bless5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is the truth mate

[–]Emerald__Faith2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Can someone tell the purpose of this stuff? I've never heard of it before.

[–]natod122 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Most use it as a preworkout supplement, can confirm it gets me 18yr old hard if I take it consistently a few days

Edit: I use the citrulline version

[–]askmrcia1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I don't know all the science behind it. But it's normally used as a fitness or workout supplement. I believe it's supposed to increase your blood flow.

I know it works on me personally. I've been using it the past year. If I take it 20mins before a workout and drink plenty of water I will have a ton of energy.

And yea, it gets you an erection. You take two pills I swear in 20mins you'll be hard and horny for days.

So I recommend not taking it every day.

[–]DeatCoreBoy17 points8 points  (2 children) | Copy

Happened to me a few times. It sucks. I learned how to push some buttons on myself to get hard. I'm in a point where I get laid like 4-5 nights a week the whole night. Coming 2-3 times per night and it's exhausting. So I had to learn how to get myself hard (telling her nasty things, pulling her hear, softly slapping her face) to avoid this.

The best thing you can do is make fun of it like you don't care.

[–]1984Survivor2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

this. also, find what you like them to do and tell them to do it.

i personally get insanely hard from her whispering in my ear begging for penetration. if i see im not that hard yet, i tell her to say those things.

win-win: she takes pleasure in fulfilling your desire and you get hard af

[–]DerpJungler0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Blowjob does the trick for me

[–]ChadTheWaiter1002 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I’ve usually only dealt with this in an ltr. Get tired of same girl over and over. But I’ve had it happen once with a rando. She sucked me off hard and when I put it in got soft. I was drunk af. I really didn’t care that much and never saw her again by my own choice.

[–]riggedved2 points3 points  (6 children) | Copy

Fuck the meds. Your main work right now is to secure a second date with her. The rest, in completely in your hands. This has happened to me some times too. It drove me nuts. Here's what you can do:

  1. Avoid alcohol.
  2. 3-4 hour period before fucking is inevitable, have an apple. If not, other fruits are ok.
  3. Eat some dates about an hour before. They give that special energy to get the 'lil you' rock hard.
  4. Here's the golden thing that works for me, especially on days when "come too quick":When in the act of penetration, don't think about it. Try thinking about your work or your hobbies. They key is not think about how hot she is or how hot you're feeling.

[–]777views1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

What’s the significance of apples or dates? Interesting advice

[–]riggedved0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

Dates: I run long distance, and my trainer had advised me to eat 3-4 dates 30 minutes before my run. I did, and I saw clear performance boost. I voluntarily tried it before coitus, the same way. My performance was better. Tried it again, worked again. Then I asked a nutritionist what special about dates, he told me that they have highly concentrated energy that gets digested really fast and is available for use almost immediately after digestion.

[–]777views0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Wow man that’s cool. I do notice a little energy when I have dates too. Do you think it’s due to the sugar content? One thing I’m worried is the sugar would be bad for sex/erection. What do you think?

[–]riggedved0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Yes, I think it is because of the sugar content. But, dates have high quality sugar that is expended by the body almost immediately. Sugar from say, a soda like Coke or Pepsi, or candies is high in quantity and is the kind that makes you fat. About dates, you needn't worry if you're not living a sedentary lifestyle.

[–]777views0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

That’s awesome, I’m gonna give it a try. What other tips/advice do you have for libido and erections?

[–]riggedved1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

This one again, don't underestimate this:

Here's the golden thing that works for me, especially on days when "come too quick":When in the act of penetration, don't think about it. Try thinking about your work or your hobbies. They key is not think about how hot she is or how hot you're feeling.

Also, read the Kamasutra. It has all the ways you enhance your sexual performance: diet, mentality, exercises, breathing patterns etc. The book also has ways you can lure a woman, a married woman too.

[–]Red_Pill_Brotherhood2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

No worries. You were trying to shoot pool with a rope. It happened to me with my first girl. We had an intermission in our first date so she could go home and shower and shave. She comes back and gets all over me, only a night dress when she arrives, and we try for like 2 hours for me to get hard but I am too nervous. It wasn't happening. We had a date a week later and I took a viagra that time(she brought wine, brussels sprouts and snacks that were all about getting me hard) and I was a bit nervous still but it went up and worked great. I was pissed as fuck for a couple days after that first night thinking I blew my chance to finally lose my V card and she wasn't gonna want to see me again. It all ended up working out good.

Anyways, don't be hard on yourself(no pun intended). Its all good, you were tired and it was a long night. Just go for it next time and you'll be fine. If you're paranoid, try a Viagra.

[–]warburgio4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Next time give her hell. You can pop some small dose of sildenafil for first times. Just dont get freaked out, dont make a big deal out of it. Fuck her good next time.

[–]Kickaxe1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Take a Viagra or Ciallas next time you're out with her and fuck her till she passes out. She will never forget just how hard it was when her expirations were low to start. ;)

[–]temerity181 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Serves her right for trying to make you wait.

[–]Gawernator1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

2:30 AM is why

[–]loloLogic1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'll preface this with stating I'm 35 and a PED user, but I always use viagra/cialis with new girls. I figure a) why take the chance and b) you'll be legendary.

[–]omega_dawg931 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

if you're typically asleep at that time, don't try to fuck.

next time at that hour of the am, get her warmed up, eat her good and whisper, ”in the morning, you’re gonna get it.”

then go to bed. wake up. and give her hell!

[–]Mzo20160 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Don't worry bro, It happens to the best of us. When it happens with a new girl, I just say mann shit happens. But i make sure when we fuck, that I fuck her Hard and until she shakes 😁

[–]jrr6415sun0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

How old are you?

[–]Bruchibre0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It happens, don't think about it. Meet her next time like of nothing had happened, and if she mentions it shrug it off, laugh about it.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Wanna pro tip?

Tell her it’s her fault. No shit. Tell her you thought she’d do it more for you but maybe not.

This will bug them. This will cause her to orbit.

[–]omeeezy0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

This happened to one of my friends but the reason he couldn’t get hard was because her pussy smelled bad lmao.

[–]CosbySauce 1 points [recovered]  (2 children) | Copy

Happens to most of us. I stock up on generic cialis pills/powder. Costs like 50 cents a dose if you know where to look.

[–]PepeInfiniti 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy

where would i look

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Wow, check your diet? I’ve never had this. Add some basic supps into your life and some basic weights training and the issues becomes that you’re too horny... too often.

Oh yeah, get Zinc tablets, eat bananas, and yeh ... don’t touch alcohol

[–]777views0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Do you do anything or eat anything in particular to help erections?

[–]randomTATRP0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Beef is great. And lifting heavy. But really heavy. Gets me horny AS FUCK. Edit: Doing heavy leg work*

[–]Irtotallynotrobot0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

The best girls I've been with knew how to fix that. Part if it's on her.

[–]worktillyouburk0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I would say, felt pretty dry the other day, can't get wet...bitch?

[–]_DonDraper_0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah, happened 2 or 3 times for me too. The last time, recently, I was with this new girl and we were both really really into eachother. However, we had a couple of glasses of wine which I suspect was the cause and I even had the damn flu so I could hardly breathe. We laughed it off when initially I didn't get hard, but I managed to gave her a decent fuck after all. Choking, slapping and hair pulling helped when I wanted to waste time while trying to get hard again haha. I should definitely quit porn and masturbating, I sometimes feel like I'm desensitized and doing that one or two days prior to getting with a girl is not the best idea...

BUT, I got a little concerned and ordered some Viagra to have it just in case... and gave 25mg a trial an hour ago. Dick is getting really hard and it stays that way longer, but only if I initially touch it lol. Will take 50mg in two days when I'm meeting another girl, even if I may not need it, just to see how it works. I'm really curious.

Again, definitely should quit porn.

[–]slamdunktiger860 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

The penis knows more than I can anticipate.

Looking back, when this sort of thing happened (rare for me, I lift and I'm vegetarian on nofap — a sort of magical mix honestly), it was because the woman was toxic and I didn't know why consciously yet.

Not every girl deserves the gift of cock. I, big bob and the twins reserve the right to refuse service to anyone. Sometimes I wish I got some advanced warning. I most likely did but probably ignored the little head. lool

[–]thrwy754790 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Testosterone is highest in the morning, it's the best time for sex.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

pop some blue pills

[–]signsoflife6200 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

This exact thing has happen to me too! She finally wanted to like at around 7am and we had stayed up all night + smoked weed. I couldn't stay hard and it traumatized me ngl. But don't worry man, usually girls understand and actually think it's their fault anyway.

If she thinks less of you then she's not someone you'd wanna hook up with anyway tbh. But yes I know it sucks.

The girl it happened to me with ended up fucking me a few weeks later anyway, so no long term damage or anything. We didn't even talk about it again

[–]1XXXMersenne0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

graze her pussy with your lil worm. DNA will give you the second (first?) wind.

NoFap will also help a lot!

[–]SolidLiquidGasPlasma-2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy

Uhhh tap it on her leg? “Suck me hard” just shove it in?

[–]thetotalpackage7-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Get your T checked bro

[–]TigerTamingSword-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

  1. Tribulus terrestis is great for getting you horny. Every other comment I make here is about tribulus lol, but it works.
  2. I've been testing a method of massaging my dick with baby oil daily in order to improve my sensitivity and protect it from friction, since I'm circumcised. As you get used to it, I suspect you reinforce the neural pathways that induce an erection, which could make them easier to attain, especially if you work with a very light touch. It's important that you do not orgasm or use any other stimulus other than your imagination, and, even then, try to focus on "softcore imagery", i.e. no penetration or rough sex, but a girl's eyes or seductive smile. Sounds like poppycock, I know, but I think it's making a difference. Think about it: if you can train yourself to get hard with just your gf's lecherous smile, anything sexier than that will be overkill for your dick. Essentially, it's about learning to appreacite subtle feminity in a sexual manner. Modern midia and porn has desensitized us in this regard, I think. Think of those Mayflower types blowing a load in their pants just from seeing some lady's ankle.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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