Stats:36, Married 9 years, 2 kids 1 and 4. Been lifting regularly for 20 years, smaller but very cut >10% BF, visible abs.

Deadlift 315 1Rm. Bench 245 1RM. Currently 5'8" and 157. I own my own business, make 150K (although wife makes more). Style and hygiene have always been on point. Never been full beta retarded ever, but never 100% alpha either. My wife doesn't boss me around, doesn't tell me what to do, still hot as when we met. I'd say we are both 9's. I do get the friendly shit tests, which I am improving at. We've had sex at least 1x/week since we got together, still get bj's about 1/month (I just have to ask really) but I don't over do it.

Sidebar: The Book of Pook. NMMNG (90%).

So here's where I'm at:

I started taking TRT after our last child (we are done), as my levels were 400. I love it, feel awesome and I am never going to stop. However, I also started taking low dose viagra as well, no issues getting it up ever, no sexual complaints from wife. I just love to have sex, and it lasts so much longer while on the Viagra, and you can just keep going after busting, allows wife to get off a couple times. I've never lasted long, ever, and I had a couple GF's that I was crazy about put me down about it. Never my wife. She can typically grind and get off quickly even after I nut. She is aware that I feel this way, but tells me she could care less.

The issue it's caused is I initiate more now, which I know comes off as a needy bitch. I do seek validation from sex, I've learned this. The wife says that sex is different now, and she doesn't like it. She literally says it just feels like "drug fueled sex" and not genuine. Also "I'm not the person she married". She thinks its the test and wants me to stop, but it's 100% because of the V. I know I'm lying because of fear, as lying is such a bitch move.

Should I man up and confess to the viagra? Or just stop taking it and keep improving and not go thru with that shitty conversation? No wife wants to think their husband needs viagra to fuck them.