One Year On TRP - Updates & Lots Of Soul Searching

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jagdecat
June 3, 2019
175 upvotes
askTRP

Dear Brothers,

Today marks my first year since i took the pill. To say the journey was hard is an understatement - to give up decades of beliefs and conditioning towards becoming a better version of me made me feel like Cypher (The Matrix) " I know this steak doesn't exist. I know that when I put it in my mouth, the Matrix is telling my brain that it is juicy and delicious. After nine years, you know what I realize? Ignorance is Bliss".

But no turning back now.

This has been my streak so far:

  1. Went from XXXL (that's three X's) to M/L in sizes (that's almost 15% Body Fat Loss.
  2. Started to work on my hair and my personal grooming (new for someone who didn't even own a hairbrush).
  3. Meditation unearthed the 'Woman' residing in my soul who used to whine, bitch and complain about everything at a moment's notice. She's still there and prone to episodes of appearance but more and more there is a calm and collective manner in which I'm approaching life.
  4. Career improved 2.5X (judged by income I'm making now) as i took on more responsibility and more importantly, developed (over time) a "have to get this shit done" attitude where previously i was more of a 'What Can I Do' kind of guy.
  5. 'No-Fap. No Video Games. No More Porn.

Results:

  1. First time in my life I understood what 101's mean. I'm still not attractive and still too much body fat (nearly 27%) but because of a better and toned skin and improved personal style, I still attract at the least 5's. Two 3's (cute but fat) even sent me nudes.
  2. Went out with 1xHB9 and at the end of it, she was the one wanting another date. Stroked my ego a lot. No f-Close though.
  3. Went to a technology event and got 21 phone numbers, 8 WhatsApp conversations, 3 dates (1 with a green-eyed beauty that in another life I would have fapped to for months over). Still no F-closes.
  4. I'm more confident and more sure of my self then a year ago.

​

Now the next stage in evolution where i need your help:

  1. My frame doesn't hold - Pressure (esp. from boss) of any kind and i crumble into a Groveling Beta. How do i develop this. I've read all sorts of posts and books and still can't seem to develop the 'dominance' roosh talks about.
  2. My beliefs are limiting my growth. Over and over i catch myself spouting negative things about myself. I would love ideas on how i can change these.
  3. I Lack "Substance" - everything that comes out my mouth is a cliche, something i read or someone else's words or pre-existing beliefs. Because of this i'm often accused of being childish (note that this has nothing to do with my performance at work which is always above par).
  4. Respect from other men. It's improving but I'm still at the bottom of the feeding bowl.

This is probably the most original document i've written in my life and well most of you will realize it's probably still not good enough. What do i have to do further to be the RP Chad people talk about? Where am i going wrong?


Post Information
Title One Year On TRP - Updates & Lots Of Soul Searching
Author jagdecat
Upvotes 175
Comments 37
Date 03 June 2019 10:44 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askTRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/240609
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/bw98dr/one_year_on_trp_updates_lots_of_soul_searching/
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Comments

[–]its-mystery83 points84 points  (3 children) | Copy

I respect you for realising your 3rd problem. Many people have it but not many realise it

[–]Thrawy1278 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

I have this problem. Often finding myself in arguements that I don't even believe in.

I have another friend like this and then he'll end up arguing with me, trying to prove a point that I told him after reading some guys opinion. Weird stuff.

[–]Mintopforte3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

Solution?

[–]superbad4life4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think you read a sidebar, maybe even meditate over it. Then practice using it in place of said cliche(s). It will be normal for you, but won't come off as cliche to the other.

[–]TRP VanguardHumanSockPuppet78 points79 points  (6 children) | Copy

(1) Understand the dynamic of bosses and underlings. The chain of command is really a food chain. When you do well, you make your boss look good to his bosses. When you do poorly, you make your boss look bad.

The real job of an underling is to make his boss look good. The real job of a boss is to make his employee's job easier, so they can make him look good.

To start out this process, think of yourself as your boss's wingman. You're trying to make him look good so he can get credit with his bosses. When you think of yourself as a wingman, it's easier to think of yourself as his peer rather than his bitch.

Don't let him exploit you, of course. Make sure he's doing what he needs in order to improve your quality of worklife as well, such as addressing problems in the workplace, protecting you from problems that crawl down the food chain, increasing pay, or whatever else falls under his authority.

(2) Keep your fucking mouth shut. Everyone has doubts. Just don't speak them aloud and know one will know for sure you have them. You will appear invincible.

You will gain confidence as you gain experience. If you need to gain confidence in a certain area, expose yourself to experiences in that area.

(3) See (2). Wisdom, and your own insightful ideas, will come from experience.

(4) See (3). When you become wise from experience and develop a reputation for reliability, other men will respect the value you have to offer.

Respect is the act of recognizing value.

Keep at it. As you said, there's no going back.

[–]olinvomibo1233 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Humansockpuppet's guide to managing your bosses

[–]superbad4life2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

(2)

Keep your fucking mouth shut. Everyone has doubts. Just don't speak them aloud and know one will know for sure you have them. You will appear invincible.

Always say less than is necessary - 48 Laws of Power

[–]inittowinit7773 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy

Excellent comment. Loved that line about respect being the act of recognizing value. I’ve never thought of it along those terms.

[–]HectoSexual-1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy

That’s just the normal definition of the word, lol. What else could it mean...

[–]TRP VanguardHumanSockPuppet5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

It's not immediately evident, since different people have different definitions for the word (in practice).

I will write a theory post on this shortly.

[–]HectoSexual1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Looking forward to it, your advice is legit.

I’m totally going to use the idea you brought up about the job of an employee being to make the boss look good.

[–]IvyExcess22 points23 points  (0 children) | Copy

DUDE! You are crushing it. Keep it up. Keep trying things with girls, keep asking questions. You are doing fantastic

[–]omega_dawg936 points7 points  (7 children) | Copy

number 3 will be fixed when you develop a true, natural, organic, IDGAF attitude about everything, esp. women.

[–]jagdecat[S] 2 points3 points  (6 children) | Copy

Can you share how you did it

[–]omega_dawg938 points9 points  (5 children) | Copy

it's one of the hardest things you'll have to learn to do.

the first thing is... don't worry about the outcome. good or bad just deal with it.

from your job to that girl over there... realize that rejection only stings for a small while .

if you don't ask, the answer is always no.

[–]okuli4 points5 points  (4 children) | Copy

- the first thing is...

- don't worry about the outcome.

- good or bad just deal with it.

Congratulations, three cliches in a single sentence. Didn't mean to bash you, just found that ironical.

[–]pillkill0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

As cliche as it might sound, it really helps me as a beginner anyway

[–]omega_dawg930 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

thank you. i specialize in cliches.

bash all you want... I'll show you and others how IDGAF about your opinion.

[–]inittowinit777 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy

*Ironic

Maybe work on your own vocabulary and writing skills before trying to be snarky and put down others to feel smug about yourself. Also, congratulations.

[–]okuli3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Ironical is a word, so follow your own advice.

[–]_-resonance-_6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

1) Whoever needs the relationship less is in control. Develop your self professionally in the same manner you do personally; this way you are never afraid to “lose” your job. They’d be afraid to lose you. This is the only way I imagine you could genuinely hold frame without bluffing. The other option is to basically “risk it,” in other words, not have a backup plan, and figure that if they do “let you go” for whatever reason, that you will have the motivation and confidence to get where you need to be (since the old job isn’t tying you down any more).

2) Observing your thoughts (being conscious) is step one. Give yourself credit. The best way to inspire growth is remind yourself of how far you’ve come, and step 1 is arguably the hardest. Nice work. Moving on, don’t fight or argue with negative thought patterns. Merely observe them in the same manner that you DARE (not DEER) with women. It’s the exact same, and most effective at rewiring neural networks.

3) Mystery, man. You don’t need to talk. Spend this chapter of your life listening. Work on the “half-smile smirk” that says to those in your presence, “Something about this situation is hilarious. I’m not quite cracking up though because that would be inappropriate.” Develop body/facial language (demeanor) that 1) actually allows you yourself to enjoy the situation. Remember, you have nothing to prove. 2) could potentially inspire others to ask your thoughts, or why you’re smirking. “I’m just listening. I enjoy your company so much and it makes me a better person.” True facts.

4) I don’t respect you because you care if I respect you.

Love you brother.

[–]soundspoon5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

I need help for the 3rd problem too!

[–]oooKenshiooo5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Realizing the thris problem is solving it half way. Whenever you encounter this in yourself, ask yourself: can I rephrase that opinion on different words so it still means the same thing?

It is a bit like music. There is only 12 notes, but you can still make a conver song your own by understanding its essence and applying it to your very own psychological makeup.

[–]ZR19874 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Way to go!!! This is inspiring! Your outlook is going to carry you further than you imagined.

[–]_Ulan_3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

My frame doesn't hold

I admire how you understand that you frame is fragile - but you don't pity over it. That alone is a great mentality, everyone fails to maintain it at some point in their lives.

[–]WillSalt2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

There's thin self confidence you get from just thinking well about yourself, and there is true self confidence you get from actually getting good at stuff. You are already taking the right steps by becoming better at things. Just be stoic about your self doubts and they will take less space.

[–]swervoooo1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Start doing affirmations about yourself, there allot of videos on youtube that will help you and do them everyday!

[–]0io-1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Hey OP, great work, keep it up!

You'll find things get a whole lot easier when you drop from 27% body fat down to under 15%. You're lifting weights, right? Keep lifting.

With the job, you're already doing great to get your income up 2.5x but to really break out of the issues with your boss you'll need other job offers that pay more. Then it's a lot easier psychologically to push back and request the resources that you need.

Frankly, if I were you, I wouldn't worry too much. Just keep doing what you're doing. You're on a great trajectory right now.

You've gone from "invisible and unfuckable" to "mildly interesting fat guy just appeared on the radar". If you keep it up for another year you'll be at "hot guy with a great job". When you drop below 20% body fat you'll see an uptick in IOI's. When you drop below 15% BF you'll have girls making excuses to come hug you and grab your arms etc.

Never heard IOI's called 101's before. Indicator of Interest.

[–]ogkushinjapan1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I hope the 21 numbers you got was out of like a 100 business contacts at the tech con tho. Goal is still to network for prospects.

Pussy should never be the goal but a supplementary to yourself.

[–]mega_kook1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

This might seem weird , but for problem 3 you need to break down your "filter" so to speak. Start saying what comes to mind instead of what you think you should say. It will be awkward at first but it is a skill you need to practice, just like anything else. I have personally been learning what to observe and how to translate that into words for different social situations.

[–]ThinSpiritual1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'll use an analogy to provide some color on this. Every dancer started off learning basic, standard, moves and sets. Great dancers eventually create their own and develop their own styles. TRP is the same, in fact, don't even need to call it TRP at all, because TRP is just a combination of "moves".

Don't force yourself to absorb everything. Read, verify, practice and then take in those that work for YOU. That's how you develop wisdom and frame. If the words coming out of your mouth sound childish, then you've still internalized nothing. Remember the key is to self-validate. It doesn't matter if something you believe in appears to be contradicting TRP, if it works for you now then use it.

Eventually, you'll have more context on more things, experience builds upon itself as long as you're still walking the path. Until then, just ask yourself a simple question whenever you feel your frame is crumbling:

"What the fuck am I afraid of?"

Did dare to touch that HB9's ass? What are you afraid of? Rejection? Kill your hamster. Didn't dare to speak your mind to another male even though you knew you had a good argument? What are you afraid of? Is he gonna punch you then fuck you in the ass? Let's say he does, because two of your are fighting in prison right now. What are you gonna do? Do you fight or just let him stick his dick in you to destroy your confidence?

If for any reason you die in the next moment, and I mean, the next fucking moment. Can you die free? Visualize that, then do what you wanted to do. Take that first step and walk the fucking path, get there and feel it for yourself what it's like. Don't like it? Turn around at any time.

Bro you just gotta step out of your edge and try things, because that's how you redefine your edge and expand your world and your frame.

[–]a7000-a0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Reminds me of Red Pill Dad's post on his year being Red.

[–]Nighthawkdragon80 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Nice! Il give some advice based on your problems you mentioned:

Don't worry about "respect" from other men. More so be authentic, and learn from instances where you get good or bad feedback. Respect is simply ego inflation, does not matter at all.

In terms of substance, focus on trying to enter a creative state when you are out. Like don't necassarily TRY to game, but rather allow game to come to you through your mood your in. Say things to pump your own state rather than to take from the girl.

[–]Standgrounding0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Wow, your self-awareness is straight up amazing. It's great to be able to see your problems and progress so far!

[–]redbananaboard0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Dude, I think you already got a fair amount of useful advice here. So I want only to say congrats brother. It takes courage to do what you're doing, be consistent and in a couple of years, you'll certainly be an even better version of yourself. Keep it up!

[–]Zoole0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

My friend, concerning on how to become a true alpha and full of substance, I believe I can answer that question.

A journey. You can never change who you truly believe yourself to be until you cause the catalyst of change. It can be anything, but to be a true alpha, you need to walk in the room and know that no man could stand before you.

It Doesn't require size, looks, hair, or anything. Simply true confidence in your power. A rich man can become alpha easily. I became one once as well, when I was young and the leader and role model of a large group of friends. My power over others gave me mentality of a father, or big brother, and I changed. Power comes in many forms, through your accomplishments, wealth, charisma, but ultimately it must be gained through trial and character for the poor or weak.

[–]HIJKelemenoP0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

First of all this is the first post in a long time that I’ve said, “wow!” Out loud.

Good for you man. You’re fucking killing it. You’re not doing anything wrong from what I’ve read. Just keep on keepin on dude!

You’re talking to hotties, losing weight, improving your style all around, and are far and above a lot of the guys on this sub. Good job! Don’t change anything, just keep adding to it slowly. You know where you need to improve. We all know where we need to improve. It’s not about winning every single day but finishing the marathon. You’re killing it.



You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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