Hello, gentlemen. I write this post with tears in my eyes. I found this sub at the beginning of this year, and there have been growing pains ever since. However, I've hit the biggest one so far.
I'm currently making the move from AL to NY and I decided to take my mom, brother, and aunt with me to NYC to apartment hunt. After the grueling and exhausting search, I was torn between two places: 1st option was a place I personally fell in love with, but my family disliked and the 2nd option was a place that was so so, but my family loved it because it was...safe.
I decided to tell my family the news (I chose the first option) at a nice dinner tonight, and it did not go well. My mother disagreed with my decision and tried to change my mind, but I was pretty set with my decision. My mother started to belittle me saying I'm not ready, I'm making a huge mistake, I'm being stubborn/hardheaded, etc etc. Every time I tried to voice my opinion, she would shut me down or speak over me. We had a terrible waitress that added to the stress. We eventually left and my mom pulled me to the side to "discuss" more.
The discussion devolved to her yelling and talking down on me and every time I tried to talk she would say "I don't want to hear what you have to say". Seeing how we were not going to have a conversation between two adults, I resorted to just nodding my head which infuriated her even more. Seeing I was staying as calm as possible, she pushed the nuke button. "You are acting just like your deadbeat father."
I've told her multiple times how I hate when she says that to me knowing damn well I'm doing everything I can not to be like him, yet she still did it. Well, she got the emotion she so desperately wanted from me, but instead of blowing up, I simply got up and stormed off before I said anything I would regret. I went to a nearby bar to cool down and texted my brother to let them know I was safe and needed some space, but HE got on my case. He started saying how dare I treat Mom how I did and how I have serious anger issues I need resolved before entering the real world. I told him how I have respect and love for myself to not sit there and be treated like that and he said I should have taken it because it's our mother???
Anyways, by this time, it's around 1:00am so I head to the hotel only to find out my card doesn't work. I go to the lobby and am notified that my card is deactivated. And here I am. I've been on the streets of NYC for the past 2 hours.
I am glad that I found TRP. It has allowed me to regain purpose in life and begin the transformation of becoming the man I want to be, but I'm not going to lie, I'm hurt. My mother has controlled the past 22 years of my life and now that I've finally put my foot down and made my own decision, I'm treated like this? What the absolute fuck.
Anyways, I'm sorry for the long post, I just needed a safe place to vent.
Thanks.
Edit: Btw, I was able to find a hotel to crash at for the night! I'm good now. On my way back to my family to make amends and head back south.
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