What’s your “walking around” Dread Level in your marriage/ LTR?

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June 7, 2019

I(48) am 2yrs divorced (18yr marriage - married the wrong girl - bluegill life - took 3yrs to work from D1 through to D10 before pulling the trigger) and in a LTR(32). She’s probably more RP than most people posting here. No relationship issues beyond occasional comfort tests.

That being said, I vetted this girl strongly and don’t see her negatively negatively impacting my plan at all. Either way, the go plan is same as the stay plan.

So for me, I’ve lived the BP life, I understand and apply RP principles, vetted a First Mate and using RP tools and I know I’m the prize and her behavior is appropriate. I’ve never had a problem getting sex. I happily divorced my Ex even though we were having sex daily and regular threesomes with younger single unicorns.

So, what’s a healthy Dread layer to walk around with when the relationship works and the good behaviors are there and bad behaviors are manageable? For me, I’m thinking it’s around D2 or D3.

What say you?

Post Information
Title What’s your “walking around” Dread Level in your marriage/ LTR?
Author Big_Daddy_PDX
Upvotes 7
Comments 30
Date 07 June 2019 05:23 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/241242
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/bxqvx3/whats_your_walking_around_dread_level_in_your/
Similar Posts

Red Pill terms found in post:
dread gamelong term relationshipcomfort test

[–]MrChad_ThundercockBig Red Machine15 points16 points  (1 child) | Copy

It’s a relative scale. Just keep your SMV higher than hers.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah, agreed. Once you hit a certain point it's just game and frame. If you are fucking when you want you don't need dread. Good girls don't need dread, they need dick.

[–]beta_buxxx12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy

I would say 6. I don't see these as any different from being a high value man (which you are, right?):

Dread Level 1: Learn to recognize and start passing Shit Tests.

Dread Level 2: Develop an action plan to improve the major areas of your life.

Dread Level 3: Begin to build a life apart from your wife.

Dread Level 4: Begin conditioning your availability to your wife with her treatment of you.

Dread Level 5: Upgrade your clothes and start dressing ‘up’ more of the time.

Dread Level 6: Begin to study pickup artistry. Before you do anything stupid, use your newfound knowledge about the stages of seduction and pickup artistry on your wife.

Why would you ever want to be any lower?

[–]itiswr1ttenRed Beret10 points11 points  (7 children) | Copy

I came up with a really great situation. My OLTR is 22 and bisexual. She earned her promotion through excellent behavior.

We are currently vetting girls to be our shared girlfriend. As a result, I'm permanently at max dread - I can openly fuck these other women with her, and without her once we've fucked them together. She is away for 10 days so I am rotating thru 3 candidates while she is gone.

While she has a sexual kink for sharing me, she is still a woman. I'm the only dick allowed. So her competition is right here 24/7.

I recommend it highly AMA

[–]Big_Daddy_PDX[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Been there, done that. Fun while it lasts, but that lifestyle gets old. I did enjoy going out for drinks w/ both and watching people try to figure out which one I was fucking.

The biggest issue becomes scheduling. Career, kids, and man time all limit exposure. Pretty easy to hunt for fresh blood pit on the town as a team though. That’s good times. At one point I was using an app to track both their cycles to help w/ scheduling.

[–]RPeed4 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy


Is the chick a fat goth? I’ll know if you’re lying.

[–]itiswr1ttenRed Beret1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Blackanese big titty island princess who grew up in USA. Total Stacy

[–]FereallyRedHard Core Red[🍰] 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Itiswrit is legit.

I've seen pix. Not of dicks. Dark brown nips. Sexy hips.

I do so like green eggs and ham. Thank you. Thank you, Sam-I-am.

[–]RPeed1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

And they say prose pornography is dead. Nice word picture. I am 100% there.

[–]WolfofAllStreetz1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Same situation as written however we lost one and back on the hunt for another. Pain in the ass it is because mid 20 somethings are about as logical as a 3 year old after four Monster energy drinks.

[–]redwall9210 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

She’s probably more RP than most people posting here.

Ask her.

[–]BostonBrakeJob7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy

All those hot-words just to ask a retarded ass question?

[–]black_jack_davy5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

It's like someone trained a bot on /r/askMRP.

[–]RedPillCoach7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

5, sometimes 6.

[–]SBIIIRed Fucking Commando6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

BPPs book is a good book. But it's just a book.

If you live your life according to prescribed "levels of dread" that someone else wrote in a book, then you're a fucking idiot.

Live life at your own level.

[–]IRunYourRiver0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Fine, but it's a heuristic everyone here knows and can relate to. Sure, at some point the structures disappear, but most of us don't get to that point w/o some guidance.

[–]0io-Tsundere5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

You want other women to be checking you out and flirting with you.

I like to think of abstract art. If you spent $200 buying some paintings your wife hates at a garage sale the wife might say you're an idiot and put the paintings out in the garage.

Then imagine she's at a friend's house and they have book on the coffee table and it turns out the paintings you bought sell for hundreds of thousands of dollars at auctions.

All of a sudden she loves the paintings and wants you to find more of them.

Whenever wife sees some hot girl checking you out, it sends the message that what she thought was worthless is actually very valuable, and all of a sudden she likes you a whole lot better.

So... Dread level 7 or 8? It's not so much that she's afraid you'll leave as it is she sees there's a lot of demand for you.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

Dread only works if you are ready to walk away.

So I am always walking around like I am ready to walk away.

[–]RPeed2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Seriously underrated comment IMO. Without this, it’s just building a better beta.

[–]BobbyPeruRed Beret5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Passive dread is much more powerful and long lasting, so dread level 7. Ultimately, this is about you, not her - that’s important.

[–]mrpthrowa3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

You're asking the wrong question IMO.

You should strive to be a high value male, period. That should do it.

Not because you want to have "dread", but because that's what a man should be.

You need to be a Man. A MAN.

Either be, or you're not.

[–]Big_Daddy_PDX[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

That makes better sense. Thanks

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

I think its different one you have gone up to 8 and gotten compliance and plenty of sex. I went up, got compliance and went back down to 4 and hang out there. I continually dress nice and stay busy. She wants to please me and fucks me on demand, why would I up the dread? I've noticed that upping dread combined with compliance and fucking just makes her freak out and I get more comfort tests. In an LTR dread is less important once you establish frame and she knows what the fuck is up. I am the prize and she knows I can fuck other women if she stopped, why continue pushing dread if the point has been made and I get what I want?

[–]Big_Daddy_PDX[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Solid. I agree w/ that assessment.

[–]SepeanRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

At 8. Not that I actively do anything for it, but the way girls are, it’s effectively 8.

[–]UnbreakableFrame2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

If you have to ask this question then you are not as experienced in the pill as you claim to be. This is basic as fuck.

[–]helaughsinhidden1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Dread is an answer to hypergamy. Hypergamy floats, so it is a constant adjustment. Typically all you need to do is remind her that the dread waterline rises too.

[–]AZ2MT1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

DL 8. Anything less and you aren't really applying dread.

[–]useful_stranger1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You’re experienced so you have a feel for it, more than targeting a number on a scale. I’d say act 80% player /20% provider. Sometimes amplify more player based on the situation (eg you’re in a place with lots of women around), other times more provider/ comfort (eg she’s going through a tough personal time for some reason).

Congrats on landing a nice LTR with a young gal.

[–]muzzy_w1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

8: She has to see that you can still turn heads and she'll point out to you the women that are looking at you.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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