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Wife pushing back after upping my SMV and holding frame.

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July 1, 2019
22 upvotes

So hopefully I get some decent advice.

Wife and I had issues found TRP/MRP and started working. I post to OYS, I lift, I've been STFUing, passing tests (or so I feel and seems). I've made l progress, but I want to continue to grow and make progress, any advice, brutal honesty, ect is appreciated.

The only unique part of this relationship is our son is severely special needs.

Things have been going well, until Saturday. Our son was in the room sleeping and our baby monitor went off, she went and handled it, and came back. The second time it went off I was reading and as it went off she said "your turn". I simply was trying to finish reading the last part of the paragraph of the book (maybe an extra 10-15 seconds, this was non-emergency) and didnt respond (I assume in a timely manner suiting her) and she just snapped at me "are you just going to fucking ignore me?!"

I set my phone down, told her not to be shitty with me, in firm tone. Got up, took care of kiddo, and then changed clothes and went to work out. When attempting to leave she insisted I stay with a compliance test "Wait, come here. Dont leave." Nope, I left to worship Odin in the iron temple.

Came back, trying to bring good energy. I told her I wouldn't fight or argue, and was in a pretty pleasant mood. She however was distant, obviously angry, and cold.

I maintained my attitude but withdrew attention from her.

The next morning I attempted a fresh start, and she was still clinging to this ridiculous event. So once again, withdrawal of attention and went on about my day. Even went as far to hang with the boys for a few hours that night.

Now for the interesting part, last night she left this elaborate page of a note detailing how she's worried for the marriage. How she wants love, respect, and compromise (interesting she says compromise, because I refuse to compromise on some shit I dont want to do). She also stated she doesnt want to have sex then go on about our separate missions (not sure what to make of that?) Long story short it was an emotional appeal for beta behavior and to give her power. Perhaps I've been failing comfort tests?

I spoke to her and stood my ground. She wants better communication, which I agreed to. She dislikes that I "shut down and refuse to fight". I told her that wont change because I refuse to spend energy fighting. She played very female games, basically saying that I go on about my mission and dont entertain her, told her that's not my job to entertain her, but I've invited her multiple times to join me on my journey.

She then hit me with a test, a hypothetical question. Saying she feels I only act closer to her if I receive sex, I told her yes that's the main way I feel loved. Never hid this, never denied this our whole relationship. She asked "What if I couldn't have sex for 6 months, or a year? Would you leave?" I answered honestly and said I didnt know.

I then took this opportunity to express my vision of how the marriage should go. I laid it out and asked if she would grow with me. She said she needed to think, so I shrugged and went on about my shit. A few hours later I asked if she had come to any decision. She had but the concern was my answer to her stupid hypothetical question. And then tried to correlate it to if I lost my job. (This happened in the past) and I sharply (probably a mistake here) reminded her that when this did happen she was disrespectful, mean, and cold.

This lead to her shifting into me being hung up in the past. Before feeding anymore into this mess I realized I was DEERing and decided it was best to just STFU. I refused to fight and told her to stop, and left for work with no affection given.

So, advice? How do I move forward, keeping my frame and keeping attractive traits? What can I expect? Critiques?


Post Information
Title Wife pushing back after upping my SMV and holding frame.
Author TheDeathOfMorality
Upvotes 22
Comments 47
Date 01 July 2019 02:15 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/244080
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/c7t3f7/wife_pushing_back_after_upping_my_smv_and_holding/
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Comments

[–]CrazyLegs7831 points32 points  (2 children) | Copy

When she hits you with rhetorical questions about sex "what if's," hit her right back with "why, do you plan on closing your vagina for 6 months?" or "Is sex not enjoyable enough to want to have it more often?" and do this in a fun, light-hearted manner. It's a joke to you that she would ever ask such nonsense.

When you ask her to get on board with your mission and she says she needs to think, she's grasping for power. You yielded to her when you came crawling back for her decision. Don't fucking ask what her decision is, you don't care! Next time don't ask her about being on board with anything. Assume she is and act accordingly. This goes for everything, including sex.

Remember, you have to do all this yet still be fun to be around. Everything is fun and enjoyable.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (1 child) | Copy

Noted.

I wont make that mistake again.

I know some or most of this is a grasp at power, hate that I failed here.

I'll try to be more fun.

Thanks.

[–]CrazyLegs789 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

It's all good, a mistake would be not learning form this. It gets easier, and it sounds like her little hamster wants to submit. Show her enough comfort that she can.

[–]HornsOfApathyMod / Red Beret22 points23 points  (5 children) | Copy

I'm going to show you something, and you're not going to like it.

You're expecting your wife to operate within your magnificent frame that has zero butthurt and is a safe place to land.

Problem is, you're still a faggot who gives way too many fucks.

She isn't attracted to you like you think she is and you clearly have a shitty track record of boundaries.

How do I know? She snaps at you all the time, then you fail a comfort test, and dream up this big journey for the two of you in which you give no direction or place or mission for her to be in that journey - just "it's not my job to entertain you" comments.

Therefore, your wife feelz like she has no place in your life so she goes and writes long letters, shit-tests you, comfort tests you, and snaps because YOU ARE NOT LEADING HER.

Saying she feels I only act closer to her if I receive sex, I told her yes that's the main way I feel loved.

Geez man this is some faggot shit right here.

Her: You only act closer to me after sex!

You: Hmm. Maybe you're right.

Learn to fog, motherfucker. And stop talking so fucking much.

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (4 children) | Copy

You're right, I fucking hate this, but you're also on point. This is the shit i come here for, ruthlessness in checking my ass.

In the past I did have boundary issues. I'm continuing to work on this.

Feedback to make sure I understand: I need to STFU more, up my IDAGAF, and work on leading?

You're call out is more appreciated than you know!

[–]HornsOfApathyMod / Red Beret7 points8 points  (3 children) | Copy

You need to STFU more, but do so with intent. You need to figure out what that word means to you.

she just snapped at me "are you just going to fucking ignore me?!"

I set my phone down, told her not to be shitty with me, in firm tone.

This is exactly where you failed the test. I bet if you look at the rest of your post here you'll see that everything you saw and heard thereafter was a result of her knowing you failed that test and upped the ante.

How did you fail?

You provided her drama, and not in a good way.

A simple 2 second STFU stare in her direction would have sufficed.

[–]man_in_the_worldRed Beret9 points10 points  (1 child) | Copy

Your inconsistent overreact/underreact behavior projects frustrated beta (unattractive; no leadership; worthy of caution but not of respect), not the attractive alpha frame that you imagine.

The standard beta approach to conflict is to

  • avoid it by DEERing, lying, hiding, surrendering, and sacrificing boundaries,

  • respond with passive-aggressiveness and resentment,

  • which builds up until he reaches a breaking point, giving him the momentary courage to explode with an emotionally uncontrolled, excessive retaliatory response intended as a "Back off!" warning rather than a permanent change,

  • and then subside back into beta behavior to repeat the cycle.

Your first order of business is to break the beta behavior cycle, and learn to take a more consistent, alpha "measured, dispassionate response."


The second time it went off I was reading and as it went off she said "your turn". I simply was trying to finish reading the last part of the paragraph of the book (maybe an extra 10-15 seconds, this was non-emergency) and didnt respond

Underreact ...

and she just snapped at me "are you just going to fucking ignore me?!" I set my phone down, told her not to be shitty with me, in firm tone. ... then changed clothes and went to work out.

Overreact.

Came back, trying to bring good energy. I told her I wouldn't fight or argue, and was in a pretty pleasant mood.

You volunteered a preemptive beta DEER; how much bluer could you be?

She however was distant, obviously angry, and cold.

Typical reaction to unattractive beta behavior.

I maintained my attitude but withdrew attention from her.

Overreaction to, and within her frame.

The next morning I attempted a fresh start, and she was still clinging to this ridiculous event. So once again, withdrawal of attention and went on about my day. Even went as far to hang with the boys for a few hours that night.

See the reactive beta pattern? And how your behavior is always in reaction to her frame, instead of emerging from your own? You're "sometimes not following" her frame, not "leading yourself (and eventually her)" from your frame.

You're still in Phase 1, learning to Stop Operating in Her Frame. Avoid Rambo overreactions for several months until you have some semblance of your own frame, not just your current reactive not-her-frame that seemingly all n00b career betas mistake for frame.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You're right. I need to double down and work on congruence and nonreactive behavior.

[–]JudgeDoom6912 points13 points  (7 children) | Copy

Saying she feels I only act closer to her if I receive sex

Remember to still be fun. Still be her friend. You've gone full Rambo and now it's time to dial it back a bit.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (4 children) | Copy

Well hopefully this doesnt sound like DEERing, but I've been playful and fun recently. I go be her friend, and try to not Rambo.

Is it Rambo to cut attention/affection when she acts out or is shitty? If so, then you're absolutely right.

[–]umizumiz7 points8 points  (2 children) | Copy

Not cut, withdraw.

Your attention is still there, but she receives less of it when she acts poorly.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

Then the rambo comment is spot on and I've failed to understand.

Could you expand for me to understand?

[–]JudgeDoom691 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

"Redpill-Rambo" is when a newb goes overboard and tries to apply everything he learned at once and goes way overboard with it. You can be an alpha male without being a douche.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Is it Rambo to cut attention/affection when she acts out or is shitty?

Define shitty. In a bad mood -> I wouldn't cut it out. Shit testing you -> don't cut it out. Denying sex for multiple days -> cut out time and attention. Saving a Low Sex Marriage talks a lot about this. It's a great book and helped me navigate this area on attention/time/affection/presence removal.

Just be the fun guy. Let her rage at the world and you just be the oak in the storm.

[–]ReddJiveRed Beret5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

Her friend?

Don’t know about you but I don’t want to fuck my friends.

[–]MrChad_ThundercockBig Red Machine0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yep good catch.

Friend or lover, pick one.

[–]SepeanRed Beret4 points5 points  (4 children) | Copy

This is so normal I put worrying about it on https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/bsxtu5/10_ways_to_fail_at_mrp/

Just pass the shit test, and move on. There will be more and harder tests in your future, this is part of the process of alphaing up and making your wife submit.

Instead you got butthurt and tried to debate her about the future of your marriage.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

You're right. I did try to debate her and took me a bit to realize I was falling for the trap.

This shit test got me because it was unexpected with the letter. I've been doing well with tests but this tripped me up and had/have no clue wtf to do considering it was some elaborate note.

I trust this community because its helped me tremendously. Looking for feedback on whether or not I'm headed down the right track and making decent moves.

[–]SepeanRed Beret3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

This shit test got me because it was unexpected with the letter. I've been doing well with tests but this tripped me up and had/have no clue wtf to do considering it was some elaborate note.

You pass one test, she’ll test your frame with a different kind. She’s probing for weaknesses. When she tries a different approach, don’t let it throw you - it’s not a sign you’ve failed, on the contrary.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

What would be a practical approach to a letter like this?

And appreciate the guidance, it's been a hell of a ride and you guys are a wealth of true objective information.

[–]SepeanRed Beret4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

I’d just ignore it. If she brings it up, tease her a bit, say she’s cute when she sends written instructions or something. It’s a shit test, just hold frame. Don’t for a second think you should listen to her, it is just a test to see if you can remain cool and unfazed.

[–]stoicstephen4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

4 words...

Don't Take Women Seriously

[–]Tbonesupreme9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

"If I can't have sex for 6 months, would you leave?"

Just tell her that the odds of her vagina and mouth both being shut down is like zero.

[–]BostonBrakeJob3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

Things have been going well, until Saturday.

Still keeping score, eh?

Our son was in the room sleeping and our baby monitor went off, she went and handled it, and came back. The second time it went off I was reading and as it went off she said "your turn". I simply was trying to finish reading the last part of the paragraph of the book (maybe an extra 10-15 seconds, this was non-emergency) and didnt respond (I assume in a timely manner suiting her) and she just snapped at me "are you just going to fucking ignore me?!"

So.... you didn't have to respond when she says "your turn", but it may be worth figuring out why you chose not to. Anything from "I got it" as you finished your paragraph, to a totally honest "a few more sentences and I'll get up."

You can't expect her to know you were 10-15 seconds away from a good stopping point, unless she's an accredited psychic?

told her not to be shitty with me, in firm tone.

"Learn to read my mind, bitch."

Got up, took care of kiddo, and then changed clothes and went to work out.

You're butthurt. Why? What bothered you so much?

When attempting to leave she insisted I stay with a compliance test "Wait, come here. Dont leave."

She was telling you she didn't mean to get shitty right here. Closest to a sincere apology you'll get in a situation like this, and she gave your fragile ego way more than it deserved, given the circumstance.

Came back, trying to bring good energy.

Good, you reset...

I told her I wouldn't fight or argue, and was in a pretty pleasant mood.

.....oh boy. You're idea of bringing good energy in is by bringing up previous negative energy??

She however was distant, obviously angry, and cold.

Just as expected.

I maintained my attitude but withdrew attention from her.

Punish her because your ego got hurt and you're too boring to shift the mood with actions? If you're gonna push, you better know how to pull. That, or give so little shits that you don't need to come here to recap the whole "ordeal".

The next morning I attempted a fresh start, and she was still clinging to this ridiculous event. So once again, withdrawal of attention and went on about my day. Even went as far to hang with the boys for a few hours that night.

What did you want her to do, sprout a dick and fuck you to break the tension? Seriously my man, you clung to it too. Get to the why.

Now for the interesting part, last night she left this elaborate page of a note detailing how she's worried for the marriage. How she wants love, respect, and compromise (interesting she says compromise, because I refuse to compromise on some shit I dont want to do). She also stated she doesnt want to have sex then go on about our separate missions (not sure what to make of that?) Long story short it was an emotional appeal for beta behavior and to give her power. Perhaps I've been failing comfort tests?

Perhaps she literally has no fucking clue if you even like her anymore. She told you she was worried about the marriage, the rest is the hamster wheel squeaking. She was worried you are ready to walk, who cares why she was worried, the fact she was fucking worried about losing you should be enough to show this woman is on your team. Figure out if you're ready to walk or not, then start acting congruently to that decision. Or, let the perceived power go to your head and spin your wheels for another 6 months. You do you.

I told her that wont change because I refuse to spend energy fighting. She played very female games, basically saying that I go on about my mission and dont entertain her, told her that's not my job to entertain her, but I've invited her multiple times to join me on my journey.

She's begging you to fight with her. What do you suppose her lizard brain is asking for here? Feelz, maybe? What do you suppose that means then? That you're boring, maybe? You decide.

She then hit me with a test, a hypothetical question. Saying she feels I only act closer to her if I receive sex, I told her yes that's the main way I feel loved. Never hid this, never denied this our whole relationship. She asked "What if I couldn't have sex for 6 months, or a year? Would you leave?" I answered honestly and said I didnt know.

You've been told to use AA or fogging by others here. And eventually, you'll get to a point where you can, and will, respond with some smart ass response. But if you don't understand what she's really asking you here, and what that kind of response communicates back, then that could only lead to more trouble.

She's asking a lot in that question. She's asking if you actually like her. She's asking if you enjoy her company enough to stick around without getting your dick wet. She's asking if you could leave the house and go get laid at any time. She's asking a lot. And "I don't know" said a lot as well.

And instead of understanding the fear behind your avoidance and lack of abundance, you choose to keep pointing the mirror back at her coldness.

I sharply (probably a mistake here) reminded her that when this did happen she was disrespectful, mean, and cold.

See? You knew enough to know it was a mistake, but not enough to start asking yourself the right questions. There's your que. When you hear that voice in your head saying "oops"....it's time to start digging.

So, advice? How do I move forward, keeping my frame and keeping attractive traits? What can I expect? Critiques?

Figure out if you even like her. Figure out what you want. Figure out if you're setting a good example of that want. Figure out what your frame even looks like. How it speaks, where it speaks from. And most importantly, quit worrying (past the point of learning from it, anyway) about this particular situation, and all other situations like it that will inevitably come.

And btw, do you see your own ego literally trying to cling to all of it's "progress" in your last rapid fire of questions? Are you afraid of losing all those attractive points you've got on the scoreboard?

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I do. This entire post has been eye opening thanks to the MRP community.

I'm aware now that I need to back off and pass these comfort tests.

I'm irritated I let this grow to what it is, and that I didnt AA, or any tools this community has given me.

As far as the ego, you're right. I'll work on it.

Thanks a lot for the breakdown, critique, and calling my bullshit.

[–]helaughsinhidden2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

she's worried for the marriage..........she wants better communication...."shut down"....

Extended STFU turns into stonewalling. You are not understanding when to let it go and resume being awesome again.

[–]ReddJiveRed Beret1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

So hopefully I get some decent advice.

You hope? Hope?

Is this how you go through life? Hoping things work out? Hoping that your efforts pays off, hoping beyond hope that she will just get you.

What I was hoping you’d just shut the fuck up already. Much like your wife was likely hoping.

Hope isn’t a method.

You talk too much.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

You're right. Hope isnt a method.

The true statement is I want advice and to understand.

[–]ReddJiveRed Beret11 points12 points  (1 child) | Copy

Shut. The. Fuck. Up

That’s your advice. You weren’t doing anything other then using Red Pill words to justify blue pill actions.

HER: What if I couldn’t have sex for a year would you leave?

ME: No, of course not. I need someone to clean the house too.

———-

HER: You only act closer to me when we have sex.

ME: Sex, you say? Sure, you might get lucky tonight, if you play your cards right." (with a wink and/or a smirk)

———

HER: You only act closer to me when we have sex.

ME: No, I care about getting some sleep, too, so we're going to have to limit ourselves to only half a dozen orgasms each.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

God damnit....

You're right.

Thank you, this is the shit I needed.

[–]SorcererKingMod / Red Beret0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

So many fucks you're giving. Look at all the fucks all around on the floor. I'm going to pick some up and take them home so I can give out someone else's fucks instead of my own.

6 months no sex what? Translation: you only want me for sex!

Better commun-uh-kation? Translation: I want you to run your mouth and prove you're still my beta.

Jesus man, head out of ass. Your frame is non-negotiable. If you get divorced would you really be worse off? Think carefully on that one.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You're right. This whole situation I slipped back into BP mindset.

I've put considerable thought into divorce. And have a date set to push forward with that plan, but I want to refine and build myself while attempting to ensure I can be there for my son. If I cant, I cant.

But that day is on the books

[–]Red-Curious0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

"are you just going to fucking ignore me?!"

Acceptable response: Well, I've already done the ignore part, so that just leaves the F-ing. I'm game.

I set my phone down, told her not to be shitty with me, in firm tone

I.e. got butthurt. "No, I was setting a boundary." That's not how setting boundaries works. You got upset by her tone and showed it with your sternness.

Got up, took care of kiddo, and then changed clothes and went to work out

So you gave into her demands anyway, despite her bad attitude, then gave her the cold shoulder. So many guys haven't watched /u/BluepillProfessor's youtube videos yet. You don't walk out right then and there as a display of your anger (unless things are so heated that you have to to protect your legal safety). You wait a while. You generally withdraw your presence, not withdraw it in the heat of the moment. The first is conditioning, the second is emotionally reacting.

She also stated she doesnt want to have sex then go on about our separate missions (not sure what to make of that?)

This is perhaps the most significant thing in your entire post. If you can bear through the Christian stuff, I made a post titled "Mission Matters, Nothing Else." The 16 Commandments of Poon has this as one of its main points too. Your mission is your greatest asset toward improving sexuality and respect in the marriage. If you don't have a solid mission, you'll be spinning your wheels in the mud on everything else. If she's on a different mission than you, then your top priority is getting her on board with your mission. If your mission is something garbage, like "having a great family, good home, and being happy in life," you're wasting your time. It has to be tangible and presently out of reach - and preferably something you can't do alone, ergo needing a wife to help you at your side. Like every bond chick who is not only his arm candy, but also has a role to play in the plot.

She wants better communication, which I agreed to

Yes, because communication is the life-blood of marriage and something every man should strive to improve on. /s

You ceded to her frame.

She dislikes that I "shut down and refuse to fight"

Classic guy move. Most guys think this isn't butthurt because they're not getting angry at her. In reality, it's just a different manifestation of butthurt. Incidentally, the very next post I wrote after the one I linked above was An Anatomy of Butthurt, which goes a lot more into this "robot mode" form of butthurt. That was my go-to. Trust me when I say that yelling and screaming butthurt is better than robot-mode butthurt. With women, emotion is always better than no-emotion. Robot mode guys get crap for make-up sex. Angry guys get the better end of the make-up sex deal because when the relational tension has been resolved their anger is interpreted as passion (note: women have retroactive memories, experiencing past events through the lens of their present emotions; so if they're emotionally positive toward you, they will interpret your past anger in an emotionally positive way ... ergo every battered wife after the make-up).

I've invited her multiple times to join me on my journey

Good. What is that journey? Is it something actually worth joining?

She asked "What if I couldn't have sex for 6 months, or a year? Would you leave?" I answered honestly and said I didnt know

Comfort test failed. Acceptable answers:

  • "Babe, that's what threesomes are for."

  • "There are other holes I can work with."

  • "Yes."

asked if she would grow with me. She said she needed to think

She throws out a possible future contingency. You say, "I don't know what I'd do in the future if that happened. But follow me into the future." Her: "Hmm ... I need to think about that." What's so shocking here?

I realized I was DEERing and decided it was best to just STFU

Yes you were. Good thought. But that's not what you did.

told her to stop, and left for work with no affection given

I.e. you "told her" instead of STFU, then got butthurt again.


So, advice? How do I move forward, keeping my frame and keeping attractive traits? What can I expect? Critiques?

What frame do you want to project? You just projected your frame as the guy who gets upset and can't handle it when his wife gets pissy at him. If that was the frame you were going for, bravo! You played it masterfully.

If you want to project the frame of a fun-loving guy who DNGAF about silly complaints and emotional outbursts, instead finding them cute and laughable ... then learn to AA, practice AM, develop your fogging and negative inquiry skills to buy you time while you figure out how to AA and AM, and just have fun screwing with her when she's angry. Yes, it will tick her off more at first. But when she realizes you're not an angry, butthurt guy anymore ... well, I'll let you figure that out for yourself.

Also, get your mission stuff figured out. You say you have one, but I'm skeptical about the utility of your mission in your marriage and sex life.

[–]screechhaterRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Just quit talking so much

When she wants to hang on to yesterday, or a few hours earlier, redirect, ignore or go do something else.

Your actions must dictate your frame, that you will be living in it, and not pulled into hers. Eventually, she will follow the new you, or not

[–]InChargeManRed Beret0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Your behavior sounds very spastic, is it possible you have been exposed to any 5G or RF attacks?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Ha, possibly. Luckily I got my tin foil hat my dude!

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red-3 points-2 points  (5 children) | Copy

Next time, stand her up against a wall and fuck her with your pencil dick as hard as you can, rather than vomiting words from your whore mouth.

Faggot.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (4 children) | Copy

Alright, guess I'll give that a try.

What if theres physical push back..?

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red7 points8 points  (3 children) | Copy

I am not going to whore myself out here.

(Yes I am)

You close the distance face to face with her. As you get closer your smile gets bigger and bigger. Dont break eye contact. Once face to face hands go to hips and you go in for a 10 second kiss.

Keep walking her back to the wall. All while kissing and keeping your hands on her hips. Remember that lil move from middle school dances?

One you are a few feet away from the wall you have a few choices. Start moving down her front to get her pants off, or if you have the dexterity (I do not shoulders are to big) spin her around and unbutton her pants while she is facing the wall.

You can trigger ASD at any point. So just keep going

She physically pushes you away?

I am not dealing with that here. Whole nother level.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Generally when I say she physically pushes me away, shes in an emotional state that isnt receptive to sex. I've tried this approach in the past and she pushes me away.

Maybe you know something I dont, but i cant seem to shift her emotional state from angry/fight mode to engine revving.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Generally, Generals who enter war expecting to loose, do.

[–]Mukato0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Can confirm, this approach works like a fucking charm and they EAT. IT. UP.

[–]intentional26-1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy

it sounds like you dgaf about your wife anymore. if thats the case why are you even with her?

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Because divorce is a motherfucker?



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