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Female Psychologist wants husband to become Beta

by ITlover | July 11, 2019 | askMRP

27 upvotes

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Wife went to Female psychologist/sexologist, she told the psychologist I was being dominant and still hold traditional roles at home (I do). Psychologist told her I am the reason why she has issues, and I am has-been. I am supposed to treat her very kindly whatever she does (it's only natural), sex is not her duty, she can only give it if she feels like it. Even If i pay more I should help in the kitchen and do everything like her, and she won't even has to thank me for that.

When I heard that from my wife, I said : "What about your issues (the reasons she went to psychologist in the first place) ? did she give you any advice on it?" she said : "She just told me everything is your fault, you should treat me better."

I mildly surprised by this, because I believe that WHATEVER happens in the couple it's the man's fault anyways. and while I don't really need to answer this. I think I need to have a talk with the wife one day or another. How to address this in a smarter way than : "my way or highway" ?


Post Information
Title Female Psychologist wants husband to become Beta
Author ITlover
Upvotes 27
Comments 33
Date 11 July 2019 07:27 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/245151
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/cbssb7/female_psychologist_wants_husband_to_become_beta/
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Comments

[–]brattykids12339 points40 points  (2 children) | Copy

Ok dude, I've read both your threads and then some.

You're so wrapped up in your beliefs and misconceptions you're not seeing woods from the trees. Here is an experience that's very close to yours.

Your wife has "vaginismus" yes? she comes from a traditional background yes? she has been supposedly raised on trad values where girls are shamed and trained from a young age to guard their virginity and what not right? she probably also had to show blood on the first night to prove her virginity may be? perhaps there is a strong religious background as well, perhaps where she is from some girls are shamed or probably killed if they had extra marital affairs. You've also been conditioned to seem understanding and loving, "it's not all about sex", blablabla

All sounds familiar?

My ex-wife had "vaginismus", she ticked all those boxes.

I read your thread "Feeling bad about I have become" and your situation described our situation 10 years to the Tee. Your first giant puke paragraph might well have been written by me.

We've been through years of shrinks, psychologists, reading books, support groups, fights, romantic holidays to set the mood, blablabla

We never really properly fucked... except handful of times, the vaginismus would suddenly stop and she would become the biggest slut, notably on these occasions...

  1. When I literally just said "I've had enough of this", got up and left. Dread. Sudden Niagara falls down there.
  2. When she was trying to conceive. Sudden Victoria falls down there.
  3. When I finally got hold of myself, lifted, got 9/10 physique, and she literally saw women fawning over me... the sudden hunger in her eyes...

The reality is that before this, I just wasn't man enough to fuck her

It took me years of improvement and plating girls and fucking women to overcome my ego enough to just admit it

I was a beta shmuck not worthy of fucking her, or any girl

I didn't stand up for myself

I let myself go, i didn't lift

I wallowed in self pity and support forums and blaming her and talking to her parents (ha!) and believing psychologists

I didn't have a direction in my life

I blamed her for my failures

I listened to her, i listened to her rationalising her vaginismus, I believed it even. I believed the psychologists, I was trying to fix it like an engineer, like a software engineer trying to debug a program

Story of my 20s

Eventually, realising female nature, fucking other women, the resentment that I built for her and for the years of self pity, then suddenly seeing and experiencing with my own eyes what it is to have a girl beg you to get fucked and so proud to swallow your cum, thanking you even...

I had my own matrix moment if you will...

It was too much for me to stick around and tolerate any of her behaviour and at some point I just killed the puppy and left

During the final weeks she would literally lay down naked on the bed rubbing her tits and I couldn't bring myself to fuck her, not good enough for me...


So here is what you should do dude...

It is not the vaginismus that you need to fix. It is not her, it is not finding a new shrink, or anything else...

it is..

YOU

looking at your responses... i see an aimless person blaming everything but himself, being defensive, wallowing in self pity, crying even, having no sense of direction, I see myself a few years ago.. I look at you and I'm literally seeing myself 10 years ago.

I wish someone wrote this post to me 10 years ago.

you need to fix YOU

What are your lift stats, what is your social circle like, what is your mission, what is your SMV, can you go down to the pub tonight and pull an 8 or a 9? how much of the side bar have you read

Start there... improve yourself, everything else is a distraction

Your woman is a reflection of you.... fix yourself and she might slowly fix follow... or she might not...

It's you who you need to fix... nobody is going to do it for you but you, act.

[–]matrixtospartanatLVRed Beret14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy

This IS the answer.

Great job.

[–]hmpanon2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

That really hit hard for me, saving this to read again, thank you.

[–]SBIIIRed Fucking Commando41 points42 points  (21 children) | Copy

Female Psychologist wants husband to become Beta

You ARE beta. Being an old fashioned Muslin doesn't make you Alpha, it just makes you an old fashioned Muslim.

If you were alpha, your wife would be fucking you instead of going to a psychologist to cure her vaginismus (yeah, you left that part out, didn't you?).

Somewhere along the line some medical fuckwit came up with a fancy term called "vaginismus". Here at MRP, we call it as it is - it's called a pussy that's as dry as the Sahara Desert and as impenetrable as Fort Knox. The causes of it are numerous but they all basically boil down to one thing... she ain't fucking you because you ain't attractive... you're just a fat little Muslim boy who doesn't lift, doesn't know how to lead, doesn't know how to own his shit and blames all his woes on other people.

[–]RP_PO16 points17 points  (8 children) | Copy

Is your flair “Red fucking commando” because you always do such hardcore reconnaissance on folks before commenting? Fucking hell haha

[–]SBIIIRed Fucking Commando24 points25 points  (6 children) | Copy

I was being nice today. I even left out the part where he mentoned that his wife sticks a condom on him before she sucks him off.

she latelly initiate bjs (with condoms)

[–]rp-d25 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Reeeeeeeeee!!!

[–]RP_PO5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

Jesus

[–]WesternhagenWinner4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

No, Allah.

[–]helaughsinhidden2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Oh FFS

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

She sounds like a real terrorist.

[–]RP_PO0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Hahaha- fuck i peed

[–]SorcererKingMod / Red Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

That and once the recon is done he kicks in the fucking door and takes no prisoners.

[–]ReddJiveRed Beret7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy

OP believes that if he can only reason with her. OP doesn’t even realize he can fire her.

[–]lololasaurus2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

That's a really good post. Glad you shared it.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

I don't know what you want us to tell you.

7 months ago you posted on multiple subs that your fat, bitchy wife of 5 months still hasn't fucked you, and you were repeatedly advised to leave. You didn't.

2 weeks ago, you puked all over the DB sub that you hadn't done anything about it and (surprise!) were still dealing with the same problems. You were repeatedly advised to leave. You didn't.

Now you're here, and you're rejecting the most useful insight about why this is happening because your ego is too frail to hear it. Why should anyone believe that you're willing to put in the work this time?

The quick fix is to leave your wife, but even then chances are you'll be back in 6 months because the core problem will remain. Your wife isn't fucking you because you aren't a man worth fucking. If you want to start fucking women, you first need to unfuck yourself. Start lifting, hit the sidebar, and for fucks sake stop berating your wife about the fact that she isn't fucking you.

Do that until you feel like a whole new man, then start at the beginning of the sidebar again because you probably fucked it up the first time through. Become a man with options and then decide which woman or women you want to be fucking.

Or just keep doing what you're doing... maybe the replies to your next post on surviving infidelity will finally get through to you.

[–]SepeanRed Beret5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

The psychologist is obviously clueless, tell her to find someone that will work on her issues.

If she brings that stuff up, just make fun of her and what her great psychologist told her to do.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Psychologist told her I am the reason why she has issues

She’s right. It is all your fault but it’s because you’re a faggot. You care wayyyy too much what your wife thinks and does.

[–]youcantdenythat2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

I doubt she even went to one or is greatly exaggerating what she said.

[–]hack3geRed Beret5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

She visits Chad for her therapy - he’s got a good cure for her vaginismus.

[–]nantucketghost1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is when you tell your wife: I don't care what the psychologist says, this is the way it is here and if you don't like it, there is the door.

So many of you fucks are trying to save a marriage that shouldn't be saved around here. Seeing a psychologist/sexologist? Really? You're already fucked you just don't know it yet.

She won't meet you half way so why the fuck are you trying to meet her half way? It is my way or the highway here, or at least until she's willing to give a whole lot more and stop seeing some nut job.

[–]aggierogue30 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

A lot wrapped up in here. My question is are you working more or just making more? You can do what you want and still do stuff around the house. I workout, climb, hang out with friends, read when I want, but I also pick up some slack around the house when I can.

[–]SorcererKingMod / Red Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Real simple answer here. Would your wife's issue go away if you divorced her right now? If you walked out the door and never saw her again, would she magically be "fixed"? No? Then she needs to STFU and go to a real shrink. Or you need to STFU and actually walk out the door.

[–]mrrooftops0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Whatever you really are, her psychologist is acting unprofessionally and unethically. I would report her to her governing body as, if your wife's story is true, the psychs approaches go against her training and professional oaths which her practicing license is bound by... assuming she is actually a licensed psychologist.



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