Evening, fellas. Hope you guys are well and that your self-improvement is going great.

Just wanted to touch on something I see on here often, and that’s the sentiment that what you like and don’t like doing is a key factor, if not THE deciding factor, in making you an Alpha.

This is a sentiment I’ve seen echoed across posts where some gentlemen dismissed certain hobbies outright as Blue Pill and Beta, no exceptions. Life isn’t fair, I get it, but I would like to state that said sentiment isn’t fair either.

A man shouldn’t be automatically branded a Beta just because of what he likes. The key is his attitude about it and whether he rocks it. Confidence has always been the backbone of this sub’s philosophy for making yourself better; it means owning what you like doing as part of building your frame.

Some of the most alpha guys I know, in addition to the pastimes and hobbies that DO appeal to women, like things that would initially make you scratch your head given their appearance.

One acquaintance of mine, in addition to being a boxer, is an anime fanatic. He wears DBZ T-shirts while we lift. It’s just part of who he is and he owns it. He’s also a badass I’d hate to catch a right hook from. Two other ripped guys at my gym play World of Warcraft in their downtime.

...and then there’s me.

I enjoy the following:

  1. Boxing (been doing it for a couple months now, love it.)

  2. Running 5ks

  3. Played the Fiddle for 6 years (rusty as Hell, need to pick it back up)

  4. Learning languages (Chinese and Spanish, proficient at both, not quite fluent.)

  5. Marksmanship (16+ years of experience on all platforms)

BUT, I’m also passionate about the following:

  1. Theater (did some shows for a couple years, loved it)

  2. Video games of all stripes (about to hop on a WoW server in a month or so with some old college drinking buddies)

  3. Magic the Gathering. Yep. The granddaddy of all “neckbeard” hobbies, admittedly one of my favorite pastimes when not shooting or exercising. Been doing that for a couple years now.

By all accounts, I am a huge nerd and a weird cocktail of interests and hobbies. People who meet me at bars say I look and clean up like a frat boy or a banker. The nerds I know say I look out of place wiping the floor at Magic tournaments (grooming and attire work wonders, folks). And the guys and gals I know in my boxing gym would never guess I like any of the shit I enjoy. When I told my closest buddy who knew me from collegiate business organizations and tailgating that I played Magic and did Theater he did a double-take and was like “whaaaat? No way.” Then I taught him how to play and he likes it too. I don’t hide my nerdy interests from the girls I’ve dated. They just see that I’m passionate about something that isn’t them. The key is that I own that shit. I WILL concede the point that those girls wouldn’t have given me the initial attention if I ALSO wasn’t athletic, into guns, spoke foreign langauges, had stories from global travel, etc. You STILL NEED TO DO COOL STUFF, MY DUDES.

My ultimate point is that you need to strike a balance. My fellow geeks out there, for every nerdy hobby you’ve got, you need a badass hobby to counterbalance. Lift, run, fight, do something that involves being outside. Then find a sophisticated hobby. NEVER be ashamed of what you like, just ADD to it to make yourself a more desirable man. Who doesn’t like a truly multi-faceted man that’s confident with what he likes?

There’s hope for us geeks out there, I believe in you guys.

Now throw some gloves on, hit the gym and then come find me for a round of Magic. I’ll kick your ass.